Eric Cartman is No More

Acknowledgements: "South Park" and all characters belong to co-creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone.

Disclaimer: The following fan fiction contains murder, coarse language and may be illogical at some instances.

Chapter 2 – The Act

At 5:00 pm, I reached his house and I was brought to his room. "Are you hungry? I could look for food in the kitchen." I asked Cartman. He replied, "Sure. I want some Cheesy Poofs, they are my favorite. Just look in the pantry, there should be plenty. After mum died, I now buy them by myself." I quickly rushed downstairs to the pantry. I found a packet of Cheesy Poofs and poured it into a big bowl. Secretly when he was unaware, I sprinkled some rat poison onto the Cheesy Poofs. I have always kept spare rat poison in a bottle with me to prevent the rats from biting me when I was asleep at home. It is odorless and hard to distinguish from the cheesy powder in the Cheesy Poofs, and will be able to kill Cartman in the cleanest, quickest and least obvious way.

I brought the bowl up to him and he immediately snatched it from me. Knowing that he would finish the bowl of Cheesy Poofs by himself, I was sure that the amount of poison would kill him quickly. He started munching on the crispy chips, while I stared at him slowing dying from the poison. He was whining about Stan and Kyle having vacations as they got to go overseas, when he suddenly complained of a pain in his stomach. He was about to get up from his bed and go to the bathroom to take a s***, but he soon became light-headed and fainted, with foam coming out of his mouth. When he stopped moving, I went to him to check, he stopped breathing. Finally, the asshole was dead.

I quickly dragged his body from his room to the garage. It was filled with cobwebs and had been locked for so long that the garage door became rusted and could not be opened easily. I hid his body inside a long chest, and shut it tight, taping it up with duct tape I found in the garage. I then used his bundle of keys and locked up all the rooms in his house, destroyed all the evidence I could find and left the house, locking it up. I hid the keys in my orange parka and went back home just in time for dinner. My parents high and drunk as ever, just fought in the living room, while I went into my room and slept.

To be continued in Chapter 3 - Tying Up Loose Ends...

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