Midoriya tried to be nice.

Nice was doing something without expectation of anything in return. Being nice was turning the other cheek, not because one was weak, but because they were strong enough to ignore it, accept it, and let go.

Midoriya tried to be nice.

He said his please and thank yous, something he learned and practiced early on. When his mother was sad from his father always being away, he tried to be strong for her. He didn't want to burden her any more than she was, it was the nice thing to do, right?

He didn't tell on the boys in his class who were more than a little rough in play, didn't get upset and throw a tantrum when no one showed up to his seventh birthday.

He ate cake with his mother and tried not to make a big deal because it was better with just her right?

Maybe all the things he had done, had nothing to do with being nice, a fact he was slowly realizing. He had thought nice went hand in hand with acceptance, and that just accepting how things were would be things easier in the long run.

No matter whatever he went through, he tried being nice, that was the right thing to do wasn't it?

If someone needed a pencil, if they needed to borrow some money or the answers off of his homework, that was being nice wasn't it? He was helping out his fellow classmate without expecting anything in return. He had been told when he was younger that he was being taken advantage of, but he didn't quite get it.

Not then at least, he was needed as long as he was helpful right? That was considered "helping" right?

His idea of what was nice was skewed. His current classmates were actually nice. He learned or more realized that when he did something to help his classmates, they wanted to help him as well in turn. Kindness wasn't supposed to be solely one-sided, being kind was helping and receiving help in turn.

He learned that being nice also means knowing when and how to say no to things. That kindness can be taken for granted, but it was always better to first extend a hand before extending a fist. That being nice wasn't just being kind to others, but being kind to yourself. That sometimes you do need to take into account your own needs in order to be better able to help others.

That being kind and acceptance or tolerance of abuse weren't so black and white, that one must and should be kind but firm. Open and accepting, willing to change but also willing to stand up for yourself and what you believed in and willing to point out not just your own wrongdoings but others as well.

But honestly, maybe none of that was quite right either, Kindness, Acceptance, they were words with simple meanings but when human emotions and thoughts came into play it became harder and harder to categorize what exactly being nice and courteous was.

Midoriya tried to be nice.

He wasn't perfect, something of which many a person had pointed out in many shapes and forms. He held darker thoughts like resentment, regrets, bitterness, and anxieties of the future and present.

Sometimes his current classmates would compliment his driving force, his endless optimism, and cheerfulness. And he would feel such a gut eating guilt, he was a liar.

He wasn't as optimistic about what his future laid before him, of his potential promise. He acted cheerful because honestly, things were so much better, he was so scared, scared if he showed even a bit of his darker thoughts he'd lose them. At his lowest points he wondered if he'd be missed, if he left the world would he have contributed anything?

Sometimes thought like that could be motivating, and he'd tell himself "I will become someone who contributes to society to make a better place!"

And other times he thought of the classmates from his past, he thought of all the great students of his presence and thought maybe the world would be better off if he was gone.

And to be fair, his optimism and cheerfulness weren't a complete lie, the people in his class were ones he could call friends and the reciprocated it.

The situation with Bakugou though,...was always something they danced around. He didn't want to bring them into the messy past that they had.

But it was hard to say he was over it, he had scars not just on his body but on his mind and brain and every day felt like it was getting harder to keep in.

Midoriya tried to be nice. He tried repressing the darker thoughts, the bitter, self-deprecating moments because he didn't want to bother or dump all the negative energy onto his new found friends.

Midoriya tried to be nice, but really, Midoriya was tired.

The lid that he screwed on tight to keep his emotions bottled in and locked up, loosened day by day, inch by inch.

What these held for 1-A would shake the foundation they had built for themselves, but could also be the start down the road to true Recovery.


ahhh gosh I hope you guys like? tell me what you think! hope this chapter made sense!