Siopao: (12/24/2017) Back with an update! It's quite a long chapter (at least, longer than what I typically write). Think of it as a holiday gift, lol. I'm really happy with this story's positive feedback, despite this fandom being dead. Thank you so much to bucielle, insouciance18, fan reiya, and an unnamed guest for your wonderful reviews. Yes, Gals! was a huge part of my childhood and I really identified with Aya, since I used to be a self-conscious honor student, myself. Her romance with Rei is probably something I'll be obsessed with for my whole life.
Disclaimer: I don't own Gals!
I'll be switching from Rei and Aya's POVs in this second chapter. We'll start with Aya's. Recall, this story is 3.5+ years post-series.
Rainy Way Back Home
Chapter II — Okaeri
I stepped through the automatic sliding doors and onto the hard, dull pavement outside. I cherished my first steps back onto my homeland. I took in a breath of the cool, late October air and felt a chill run through my bones. The air around the airport wasn't the freshest; it smelled of gasoline and fumes from the many taxis and buses driving about. Still, it felt good to be home.
"Aya! Over here!" I heard a woman's voice shout from across the walkway.
I turned my head and looked over towards the direction of the voice and find a familiar-looking face.
"Ran!" I replied back, ecstatic to see one of my greatest friends. She looked the same, despite it being over three years of seeing her face to face. Of course, we did video chat from time to time while I was away, so I wasn't surprised to see that her previous curly bob was now well past her shoulders. The copper color was still the same but she made away with the prominent red streak that she was so well-known for during our teenage years. It was a shock that the police department let her keep her dyed hair, to begin with. The fact that her father was police chief probably had something to do with it. Not to mention, Ran was one of the best cops they've recruited since Yamato-san.
"It's so good to finally see you again," Ran stated as I ran up to her. Immediately, I was engulfed in one of her loving hugs.
"I know! It's been too long," I replied with a tear in my eye. It felt so good to be back in Japan. It felt so surreal to be finally home again.
"How was your flight?" she asked as we strolled towards her parked vehicle.
"Extremely long," I complained, massaging my neck. I'd totally forgotten to bring along a neck cushion for the twelve-hour ride. It didn't help that the man next to me was an incredibly loud snorer. Needless to say, I was downright exhausted at the moment.
"Here, let me help," she said as she took one of my large rolling suitcases and loaded it in the back of her red SUV. I followed suit and placed my other heavy suitcase, duffle bag, and backpack in the trunk. I wiped my brow and heaved a heavy sigh. Moving your belongings 5,000 miles across the globe sure was tiring. It was crazy to think that all I ever owned was able to be packed in such a small amount of luggage.
"Thanks so much, Ran," I thanked as we both hopped into the front seats. She turned the key in the ignition and I heard the engine of the large vehicle roar to life. "When I called you last month, I was really hoping you'd be available to come pick me up and let me stay the night, since my apartment lease doesn't start until tomorrow. After all, I didn't want to bother Miyuu since she and Yamato-san are married, and all. I'd definitely feel like I was intruding in on them."
"Aya, don't even mention it! Even if you called me yesterday, I'd still come get you. I know Miyuu would too, married or not," Ran beamed.
"Still, I appreciate it," I said. "Only you two would go such great lengths for me."
"You bet!" she laughed. "Well, that statement isn't all that true, you know," she continued.
"Hm? How so?"
"Miyuu and I aren't the only ones who'd do anything for you. There's also someone else you're forgetting about."
Ah. I saw where she was heading with this conversation.
"Ran... please don't bring him up again," I pleaded. I really didn't have the energy to talk about him right at this moment.
"Okay, okay. I'm just saying, Aya. He was pretty persistent during your first year in Germany. Wouldn't stop bugging me and Miyuu for your new contact information," she explained, even though I'd heard this numerous times on the phone or during our video calls. No matter what, I never gave in to the requests. I was quite proud of myself for keeping my resolve.
"And I appreciate you both for respecting my wishes. I wasn't ready to face him, back then," I said, resting my chin on the palm of my hand as I looked out at the nighttime scenery passing by. Tokyo was still the same, yet it was ever changing. I was so glad to be back.
"But are you ready to face him now? It's been over three years since you left, you know," she spoke seriously.
"I... I don't know. He's moved on, from what I could tell. After all, he eventually stopped bugging you for my number, right?"
That's right, he's continued on with his life. Plus, I still kept up with Japanese tabloids while I was away; after all, he had progressed from being a local celebrity to a nationally-known model. I saw that he had several girlfriends after me, according to those paparazzi photos and celebrity articles. Actually, I was pretty sure that he had a girlfriend at the moment. He had moved on, for sure.
"Well, he only gave up because you never came back after one year, like you promised you would!" Ran said as we stopped at a red light.
"You know why I couldn't come back. I got really busy with a summer internship that I miraculously landed, you guys know that," I defended.
"Yeah but he had other speculations. Flat out gave up on bugging me and Miyuu after you never showed. He waited that whole summer for you. He's changed, you know."
"Oh, Ran. Can we save this for another time? I'm really tired from the flight."
"Fine, fine. But he's still part of the group so if he happens to show up during certain functions, don't be alarmed."
"Alright, fine. I won't," I said firmly, even though my insides went absolutely haywire just thinking about being in the same room as him.
"And, er, I know you told me not to say anything directly to Otohata about your return but... I may have told Yuuya that I was picking you up tonight," she mumbled under her breath.
"You... what!?" I erupted as I clutched onto her arm. That was basically the same thing as directly telling Rei that I was back. She might as well have just done that! Yuuya would for sure call Rei right away. Ran was pretty slick at finding loopholes to my instructions.
"He would have figured it out anyway!" she yelped as she tried breaking free from my hold. "I've kept quiet all these years! I couldn't help but just tell Yuuya!" she defended. I sighed. She was right. There was no use in getting all riled up.
"I... I suppose you're right. We're all adults now. I should just handle it maturely. I was going to see him eventually."
"Glad to hear you say that because... we're all meeting tomorrow night," Ran mumbled once more under her breath. My eyebrow twitched in protest. Ran was really testing my patience right away, huh?
"You're lucky I missed you so much. Otherwise, I'd probably be strangling you right now," I murmured, too tired to argue.
"Damn! Germany made you violent as hell!" she laughed. I couldn't help but join her.
I looked out at the city lights once more. I was finally home. It felt like an eternity since I'd been back, yet the memories with him were still so fresh, as if they just occurred yesterday. The wounds had definitely healed but being back in this environment was beginning to open up the scars once again. I just hoped that I wouldn't have to suffer so much this time around.
There was no use in running. I'd been running for three and a half years. It was finally time to face the music.
"Ready?" Yuuya shouted as he held a bottle of champagne in his hands. He wrestled with the cork for a few seconds until it finally flew off with a loud popping sound.
"Alright!" cheers from everyone reverberated around the room. Palm Tree was as lively as ever with all my friends surrounding me. I felt truly blessed to be in their company again. I felt like the luckiest girl in the world to be surrounded by such loving people.
"Welcome back, Aya-chan!" Yuuya shouted as the champagne fizzed out of the mouth of the bottle.
"Welcome back!" the rest of the gang repeated after him, surrounding me with their warm greetings. I looked around the room at everyone's cheery faces: there was Towa, Tatsuki, Ran, Yamato, Miyuu, Mami, Yuuya... I felt so happy to see all of these familiar faces that I'd missed so much over the years. Yet, I couldn't help but shake off the fact that one particular person was missing. I tried my best not to dwell on it and just focus on being with my friends.
"Thank you, everybody!" I replied, smiling from ear to ear. "It's great to be back with all of you!"
Towa took some champagne glasses and helped Yuuya pour the drinks. Miyuu picked up two glasses and handed one of them to me.
"Here, girl! Drink up!" my blonde best friend exclaimed as she wrapped an arm around my waist. Like Ran, she hadn't changed much either. Her short, blonde hair was now a bit longer, covering her entire neck, and the orange tips were gone.
"Miyuu, you know I can't handle alcohol too well," I stated, shaking my head. Nevertheless, I took the glass from her.
"Oh, please, I know you definitely gained some tolerance with all that German beer," she teased.
"I honestly didn't drink much in Berlin," I confessed. It was the truth, for the most part. I did grow fond of the local beers, though, I wasn't going to lie about that much.
"I bet you were a major party girl," Ran laughed after she took a sip from her glass.
"You kidding? Aya-ppe, a party girl?" Tatsuki laughed as he slung an arm around his girlfriend. The Machida boy hadn't changed much either and was still as goofy as ever. The only thing that was majorly different about this baka-purru was that they were now both Shibuya cops. I was glad that he and Ran were doing well, both in their relationship and their career. It was a miracle that they both pulled through police academy, what with their carefree attitudes.
"Aya's way too classy to be partying like that," Mami chimed in, taking a small sip of the bubbling champagne. The Ikebukuro debutante was as elegant and beautiful as ever. The major difference now was that there was a large, shimmering diamond ring on her left hand. Yuuya had proposed to her on New Year's day, I recalled Ran and Miyuu informing me about it soon after it happened. I congratulated her as soon as I saw her tonight.
"It is a bit difficult to imagine," Yamato agreed as he took his place beside Miyuu. The first Shibuya cop of the group and his loving wife were going still going strong, as expected. That much wasn't a surprise since, after all, they were soul mates.
"Anata, here," Miyuu said as she handed the other glass of champagne in her hand to Yamato.
"Thanks," he said as he kissed her temple.
"Miyuu? You aren't drinking?" I asked, observing the scene before me.
"She doesn't know?" Yamato asked his wife. I arched a curious eyebrow.
"Know what? Is everything okay?" I asked worriedly.
"Actually, Aya, I've been meaning you tell you in person," my blonde best friend started with a pink blush on her cheeks. "You see, well, I'm actually sixteen weeks pregnant!"
"W- What!? I couldn't even tell! Miyuu, Yamato-san, that's amazing!" I exclaimed, my eyes growing wide with surprise. "Congratulations, you two!"
"Thanks!" the couple said in unison. I was truly happy for them. I felt so grateful to be home in time to be able to witness this pivotal point in their married life. I wouldn't want to miss the gang's first baby, after all. That kid is going to get so much love from all of us.
"So, Aya," Mami said in a flirty voice, leaning in close to me. The room suddenly got very quiet, save for the lively music in the background. "How's the market back in Berlin?"
"M- Market?" I asked, confused. "As in the job market? Or could you be talking about the open markets? Well, there are good deals on produce during the weekends, I suppose."
"No, Aya," Mami huffed, smiling at my oblivious disposition. "A different market. The men."
The girls all laughed at my innocent mistake. I felt a bit embarrassed by my naivete but laughed along with everyone else.
"Ah. Well, German men are quite handsome..." I stated, blushing lightly. I guess it was better if this topic was coming up now rather than if he were here. That would just be a tad bit awkward for me.
"So you had a boyfriend, right? Or even multiple?" Towa asked from behind the bar.
"N- Not really!" I defended. I felt a blush dusting over my cheeks.
"Liar," Ran murmured under her breath. Miyuu giggled at Ran's remark and my look of frustration.
"Okay! I had one boyfriend," I finally admitted, throwing my hands up in defeat. Only Ran and Miyuu knew about him but even they didn't know all the details about our relationship.
"Had?" Towa asked.
"Y- Yes. We broke up recently, actually. I met him soon after I arrived to Germany and we became friends right away since we had a lot of the same classes together. He was in the same department as me and was also on the pre-med track. We were friends for a year before he asked me to be his girlfriend," I explained a bit shyly. I felt quite embarrassed to have all the attention on me.
"He was German?" Yuuya asked.
"Half. His mother is Japanese," I said. "Oohs" and "ahhs" echoed around the room. Well, save for Ran and Miyuu, who already knew about my past relationship. I was surprised that they actually kept the information from the group.
"What's his name?" Mami asked, intrigued about my love life for some reason.
"Kei. Keisuke Wentz is his full name." I smiled to myself a bit. Just saying his name aloud brought back our memories. I missed him, I wasn't going to lie. Our break-up was bitter but we ended up resolving most of our issues before my flight back to Tokyo. We still deeply cared about each other; it's just that we both were heading on different paths in life. I hoped that he was doing well. I still cared for him, despite all that we've been through. I hoped that someday he could forgive me for what I've put him through. I felt a bit sad thinking back on it again.
It was actually Kei's idea for me to keep out of touch with Rei. Keisuke was always the one I could turn to whenever I needed to vent about my frustrations with Rei. Kei became a good friend, since we clicked almost immediately. Before I knew it, he asked me to be his girlfriend. And after almost two years of dating, he asked me to marry him.
I looked at my left hand, focusing on my bare ring finger. I was constantly reminded of what I'd done to him. I still felt terrible for what I did and wondered if I'd ever forgive myself, too.
"What happened with him?" Towa asked, snapping me out of my melancholy thoughts. "If you don't mind me asking, that is."
"Not at all," I replied with a smile. "We're still friends. He even helped me pack and everything. It's just that... he was set on staying in Germany for medical school while I had other plans. He tried desperately to make me stay."
I didn't tell the entire story. I felt bad for withholding vital information; even Ran and Miyuu had no idea about my previous engagement. I thought it was for the best. They didn't need to know all the dirty details. Plus, I'd probably start crying if I were to speak about the ordeal.
"I still can't believe you're going to med school," Ran groaned. I was glad that she was changing the topic. "Another four years of classes? Then your internship and residency? I'd rather die."
"Still, I'm so glad that you decided to come back home for medical school," Miyuu chimed. "I know you were considering staying in Germany for a while."
"Yeah, I was. But I guess a huge part of me was ready to come back home," I said, staring at the sparkling bubbles in my champagne glass.
Staying in Germany was the plan, ever since the beginning. Actually, I interned at a hospital in Berlin and was even accepted into an M.D. program already. It wasn't until just a few months ago that I suddenly changed my mind, surprising all my professors and Keisuke. It set my plans back a little and I'd now have to start at University of Tokyo's medical program next year instead of already being enrolled in Berlin right now, but I didn't mind it. Now, I'd have several months to just focus on preparing for the program and settling back down in my new place. Not to mention, it would give me a lot of time for self-care and reflection.
What caused me to change my mind about coming back home? Maybe I was just getting way too homesick. Maybe a part of me was just trying to put off going to med school... I guess you could call it cold feet. I knew it was what I wanted to do but I just needed a bit more time for myself.
But a major reason— no, it was the main reason— was that I just couldn't help but think about a certain raven-haired boy. I know it sounds irrational to put your life plans on pause just for a single person, but meeting him again was really important to me. Despite my efforts to forget him and move on, I just couldn't do it completely. From within me, I knew it was time to put our past behind us for good. I wanted to go home to see him, even if it was just to give a simple apology for my long absence. Whether he accepted it or not was up to him— I just had to say what was on my mind. Only then could I truly move on and perhaps I could even start seeing other people again.
Being briefly engaged to Kei was what showed me that I had to come back home. As soon as I realized that a significant space in my heart was still occupied by Rei, I knew I had to return that ring. I knew I couldn't fully devote myself to anyone else until I faced my daunting past. I hated myself for being so weighed down by him but I just couldn't help what my heart was feeling.
Actually, since my flight left for Germany, I knew that I would eventually find my way back to him— I just didn't expect it to be so soon. No matter how I looked at it, our paths were fated to cross again. Sometimes, I even believed that an invisible red thread tied our lives together. I wouldn't ever be able to completely escape his grasp.
Then, bells. They came from the door, since someone new had just entered the cafe. My heart dropped to my stomach instantaneously. There was only one person who it could possibly be.
"Look who finally decided to show up," Yuuya teased. I didn't look back towards the door. I wasn't sure if I was ready to face him.
"Shut up," the voice replied as he took a few steps nearer. I hadn't heard his voice in over three years. I felt like I couldn't breathe; I was being suffocated where I stood.
Finally, I gathered the courage to turn around and look at him. Slowly, I turned my head and saw a tall figure standing only a few meters away from me. He looked the same, his expression was the same, his demeanor was the same, everything about him was the exact same way as before. He was still so beautiful to me and I cursed myself inwardly for still being so irrevocably attracted to this man, in spite of everything.
"Rei," I mouthed, almost inaudibly. I wasn't planning on calling him by his first name like that but it just automatically escaped my lips. It was just a whisper in the air and I was surprised that he was even able to hear me.
"Hey, stranger," was his simple reply. I smiled at his snarky response. It was quite expected of him, honestly. Anything else would have been out of his character. "Welcome home."
And, for some reason, out of all the "welcome homes" I'd received in the past twenty-four hours, his sounded the sweetest to my ears.
-Rei's POV-
I finally got myself to walk into the cafe, after just standing at the front entrance for a solid five minutes. Several times, I thought about just turning around and going home. I knew I'd instantly regret it if I did that, though. I took in a deep breath, twisted the bronze doorknob, and strolled in at last. It was ridiculous how nervous I was feeling. I didn't feel like my usual self, at all.
All eyes were on me as I took my first steps in. I heard her whisper my name, making my heart jump into my throat.
"Hey, stranger," I greeted. I didn't know what else to say. I hope she didn't take that as sarcasm. "Welcome home."
"Thank you," she replied bashfully. "It's nice to be home, again."
"Sorry I'm late," I apologized, scratching the back of my neck. Aya knew this was an awkward habit of mine, ever since high school. She probably didn't remember a meaningless tidbit like that, though. Why would she?
"It's fine. Yuuya-kun already informed me that you had a meeting at your firm," she said sweetly. I gathered up the courage to finally look her in the eye and immediately regretted it. I had to use every ounce of self-control within me to keep myself from embracing her where she stood at that very moment.
She was as breathtaking as the day she left me, despite the fact that my last memory of her was a heartbroken face, misty eyes, and a body that was drenched from the frigid rain. She looked as ethereal as ever, with wide brown, meaningful eyes that held infinite curiosity for the world. Her midnight hair kept its mystical sheen; I would do anything to just kiss a strand of it. Seeing her now made it clear: I never fell out of love with this woman. If she was beautiful before, I don't know how I'd even begin to describe her now. She was a sight for sore eyes, indeed.
"You just going to keep staring there, or you going to join us?" Yuuya said, breaking me from my trance. I was going to have to strangle him later for making a comment like that. I mean, I wasn't really staring... was I?
They popped champagne earlier and just recently opened two bottles of white wine but I opted for a beer, instead. The gang shared stories— Kotobuki and Kuroi talking about their idiotic police antics, Miyuu and Yamato discussing baby names that they were considering for each gender, Yuuya and Mami explaining their wedding preparations for next summer, Towa informing Aya that she had actually expanded the business and opened up a second location (which was actually news to me, just goes to show how mentally present I was during these gatherings), and Aya telling stories of her three and a half years in Europe.
"It's actually quite easy to travel in Europe!" she was explaining to everyone. "Last summer, I traveled from Berlin to Paris, Madrid, and then Rome... all within two weeks!"
"No way," Yuuya said, astonished.
"Amazing!" Mami chimed. "Sounds like you really took advantage of your time there."
"Makes me want to go to Europe, too," Towa said excitedly as she refilled Aya's wine glass.
I stared at her as she continued on with her stories and anecdotes. Over three years of events was told, and this was the first time I'd heard of any of it. It made me feel a bit left out; Aya had done a lot while she was gone. She was the girl who used to be so shy and reserved. The girl who I always thought would need me by her side to make any major decisions. That said girl from before was no more and she'd been dead for a while now, as far as I could see. Aya was now an independent woman who held many years of overseas experience tucked under her belt. I was proud of her, even more than before. She'd completely blossomed to the best version of herself; it's what I've always wanted for her.
"Ah, look at the time," Miyuu said, staring at her cell phone. It was about to be midnight. "I guess we should head home soon, huh, anata?"
"You do still have a kindergarten class to watch tomorrow," Yamato said. I had almost forgotten that it was still a weeknight, with all the celebrations going on right now. "And plus, I have an early shift."
"Right, you need to sleep for two now!" Aya said, placing a delicate hand on Miyuu's belly. She was so damn cute.
"Aw man, we're calling it quits already?" Kotobuki complained. Of course she would, that girl, along with Kuroi, could stay awake all night.
"Yeah, it's pretty late. Yuuya and I will head home, too," Mami announced.
"Aya-chan, how will you get home?" Yuuya asked her. Yet, he was obviously making eye contact at me. Damn that Yuuya. He was always so slick.
"I'll probably just catch a cab. My new place is on the opposite side of town, away from everybody," she replied.
"Like hell," Ran said. "Cabs are expensive. And it's such a late hour; there's a tons of creeps and weirdos out right now."
"I'll be fine, really," she insisted. With my peripheral vision, I could see Yuuya tilting his head as if he were saying, "Come on, dude! Now's your chance."
I sighed inwardly. I guess it was now or never, right?
"I've got my car. I'll take you home," I suddenly blurted.
"W- What?" she said, turning to me with wide eyes. "It's okay, Rei-kun, I couldn't possibly—"
"I don't mind. And plus, I need to make up for my lateness," I said coolly, shoving my hands into my pockets.
"Ah, o- okay. If you insist," she said, a hint of pink on her cheeks. So she still held that old blushing habit of hers, huh? Pretty cute.
I walked out of Palm Tree with her once she bade her goodbyes. Having her right beside me felt like the old days. She was so animated back in the cafe but was now quite shy and timid as she strolled beside me. Maybe she really did still hate me, after all. Maybe I shouldn't have offered to take her home. The last thing I wanted was to make her feel uncomfortable.
"So, medical school, huh?" I said, breaking the silence in the parking lot. "You're still following through with that plan, after all."
"Ah, yes. I'll start next year, so I'll just be working at a hospital till then," she explained. I sighed.
"I'm... glad," I said, stopping at my car.
"W- What?" she said as she paused at the passenger's side door.
"I'm glad you decided to come back," I spoke lowly as I looked at her.
"Ah... M- Me too," she stammered, looking down bashfully. I smiled. Same old Aya.
We got into the car and she told me her apartment's address. She explained how she just moved in this morning and had to crash at Kotobuki's place last night until the apartment was ready for her today. She hadn't unpacked yet, nor did she really have any furniture. I was almost tempted to ask her to stay at my place for the night but decided against it.
I inconspicuously looked over to her and was relieved to find her not paying any attention to me. She was staring out of the window at the passing buildings and lights with curious eyes. She must be taking in all the changes during the years of her absence. Sure, she hadn't been gone for that long but Tokyo was an ever-changing city. I looked down at her hands, which were folded neatly on top of her lap. How I wanted to just reach over and take her hand in mine. I restrained myself, with much effort.
"This is it," she announced as we pulled up to the complex's parking lot. "Thank you for taking me home, Rei-kun. You didn't have to do this."
She unbuckled her seat belt but, before she could gather herself and step out of the car, I had already walked to her side and opened the door for her. Her expression was shocked and, needless to say, adorable. Scarlet dusted over her cheeks, and I wasn't sure if it was due to her blushing or the alcohol from earlier tonight. I helped her out of my car with an outstretched hand, which she reluctantly took.
"Aya." I saw her flinch as I said her name. Did I still make her nervous? Or did she just hate me that much?
"Y- Yes?"
"Can we... talk?" I asked. I needed to seize this opportunity I had with her.
"What about?"
"About us. About that night you left."
o0o0o0o
-Aya's POV- (flashback sequence within her thoughts.)
Ah, that night. I knew that he would eventually want to speak about that night but didn't think he'd spring it on me so soon. I mean, I'd hardly even been home for a full twenty-four hours. I tried so hard to suppress the memory of that night many times, to no avail. It was dark, dreary, and rainy. Well, not at first. It began to downpour as we were both sitting in our usual cafe. I had my usual matcha latte, he had his usual cappuccino. Nothing out of the blue, nothing extraordinary. I was writing a few things down in my planner while he was on his phone. We were simply enjoying our final hours together.
"So you're all packed right?" he asked nonchalantly.
"Yes. My flight is pretty early so I'm going to triple check my things tonight," I replied excitedly. "I don't think I'll be able to sleep a wink."
"Don't forget your winter clothes. Germany can get pretty cold, I hear," he reminded me. It was his way of worrying. I smiled.
Actually, there were many things weighing on my mind at that point. I wanted to tell Rei sooner but I always backed out. I was still pretty much a coward back then, after all. I was afraid of how he'd handle my announcement.
I remember looking out at the dark sky and heavy rain. A storm was brewing. Who knew that it would actually act as a premonition for the events to follow.
"Rei-kun," I said nervously. "I wanted to talk to you about something."
"Hm?" he simply grunted. I saw it as a sign to go on.
"The pre-medical program that I'm transferring to in Berlin... is really prestigious," I said. "It's a miracle that I even got in, considering how competitive it is."
"Yes, I know. You've told me," he said. He was only half-listening, I could tell, by the way he continued to nonchalantly scroll through some news article on his phone. Nevertheless, I continued on. If I didn't say this now, it would never get out.
"Ah, yes. Well, I was wondering what you thought about me attending medical school... in Germany," I timidly explained. This got his full attention.
"In Germany? I thought your plan was to come back home for med school," he stated, a bit of surprise evident in his tone.
"Yes but I actually looked into the program over there and did a lot of research. Med school would be free for me if I stayed there and became fluent in the language. And I really mean one-hundred percent covered. I'd have a higher chance of being accepted if I stayed on their pre-med track and transitioned into their M.D. program," I said meekly, feeling his intense stare on me.
I agree, it was a bit uncalled for to have brought this all up the night before my flight... but I just couldn't find the courage to tell him until now. I thought it'd be easier for me to ask for his forgiveness rather than his permission.
"But that would mean another four or more years over there, right?" he asked.
"Yes, but... it's a really great opportunity. I mean, I was already going to be gone for three years to finish undergraduate work. What's another few years of medical school, right?"
"How about Tokyo U?" he asked skeptically. He knew I was looking into their program, too.
"Tokyo's medical program is great as well but that was before I found out about—"
"I've heard enough," he interrupted.
"W- What?" I asked, taken aback. I didn't expect this type of reaction from him. He was so supportive of my move to finish my undergraduate studies in Berlin, after all.
"I can see that this relationship is already not going to work," he blurted out, running a hand through his hair. I felt my heart breaking on the spot. Was this really happening?
"B- But, Rei-kun, we were going to keep trying when I left, right? What's different now?" I asked as I felt tears stinging my eyes.
"The difference is that you'll be gone for, what, seven... eight years?" he stated, closing his eyes deep in thought. He was obviously quite vexed from my proposition. "Do you really expect a person to wait that long? I..."
"You what?" I asked, on the brink of tears.
"I already had my doubts that we would even last the next three years with you gone. Or even the next year, for that matter."
He did? He had doubts? I was so certain that he was going to be supporting me, all the way. At least, that's how it seemed. I supposed that he was just forcing his support in the first place and that my idea to stay longer in Germany finally made him snap. I guessed that all the cards were on the table, now.
"I- I know it's a long time but I would definitely come back during the holidays and summers and—"
"It's not enough."
"But we should at least try—"
"What's the point when I already know how this is going to end? I can see I'm weighing you down."
"But you're not!" I said, getting the attention of some of the customers around us. I didn't care, though.
"This... This all might have been a mistake to start with," he said. His eyes reflected disappointment. His words were crushing me like a boulder. A bright flash of lightning lit up the dark sky for a split second. A roll of thunder growled soon after.
"Please..." I whimpered. I didn't know what else to say.
"Aya, I think we should break up," he spat. I felt a tear finally release itself onto my cheek.
"I don't want to break up," I whispered.
"We shouldn't have done this in the first place. What was even the point in pretending that this was going to work? We were kidding ourselves. It was a waste of time to try," he said, stinging me with his harsh words.
"W- Waste?" I see. So his true feelings were coming out now. I'm sorry, Rei. I'm sorry that I was making you feel like this this whole time. I was just thinking about myself all along, wasn't I? I was being so selfish that I didn't even notice his real feelings. I felt truly and utterly horrid. I really was the worst girlfriend.
"Sorry, Aya. I don't think I can do this anymore."
"You should have told me not to go, then," I cried silently. I wiped my wet cheeks with my sweater's sleeve.
"Do you really think you would have listened to me?"
I was silent. He was right. I would have gone, with or without his approval. It was a once in a lifetime opportunity. This was the best thing for me, after all. And I guessed that this breakup was the best thing for us, right now.
I calmed myself down as I sat silently to dwell in my thoughts. I was so busy thinking up options for us to avoid breaking up... but maybe this was the only thing left for us to do. Maybe he was right.
"I- I need to go," I said, standing up and excusing myself. I couldn't bear to hear any more of this from him. He flinched at my sudden exit. Was he thinking about stopping me for a second? The thought that he would even think about doing it, even for just a split second, made me a bit happy. But, in the end, he never followed through.
I ran out of the cafe and into the pouring rain. I didn't have an umbrella but I didn't care. I let the freezing cold rain overtake my body. I looked back at Rei and saw him staring back out at me through the large, glass windows. That was the last time I ever saw his face. It looked like he may have been just a tad bit sad but it was probably only my wishful thinking.
I left the next morning without saying goodbye. It was for the best. I needed to move forward and facing him again after hearing all of that would surely be unbearable.
Goodbye, Rei. I'm sorry for everything.
In my mind, I wondered how he could say such cruel words. I wondered how anyone could say those types of things to another person and be able to move on. But over my years in Germany, I came to forgive Rei. In the end, it was never really his fault. I was asking too much of him to begin with. We were both young and he had a whole life ahead of him to experience. I didn't want to weigh him down with my selfish requests. And, so... I let him go.
Or so I thought.
o0o0o0o
Back to Rei's POV
"I... please, Rei-kun," Aya whispered, shying away from me and looking down towards the pavement. I wanted to hold her face; I wanted her to look me in the eyes as I apologized to her. I wanted her to hear it all. "That night was so long ago. I don't really want to talk about it right now—"
"I'm sorry," I blurted out, interrupting her before I got too discouraged. I don't know if it was the beers from earlier that gave me the extra courage but, on a whim, I took hold of both of her hands in mine, gently caressing them. God, it felt so good to feel her warmth. I swore I'd never let her go ever again.
"What?" she asked, confusion marring her fair face. She was so beautiful in the moonlight, despite her quizzical disposition. She looked down at her hands in mine and felt relieved when she didn't pull herself away. Was there still a chance for me?
"That night. I'm sorry for saying any of it. I regretted it all as soon as I said it, but I knew I couldn't take it back. I really have no excuse... I know I really hurt you. I was so blinded by my emotions and doubt that day and ended up saying really hurtful things. I've been waiting to say my apology for over three years. I know you probably hated me after you left, that's why I wasn't angry that you didn't even want me to contact you."
I glanced up at her. I could tell that she was at a loss for words, so I continued on.
"You still probably hate me today, but I just wanted to say that I'm sorry. I know that the apology is extremely late but just know that I've felt like shit for all this time. You don't have to forgive me at this moment but I hope you will eventually. I just really wanted to let you know," I managed to all finally say. It was as if all my years of mentally rehearsed apologies went in vain. At this point, I was just saying anything and everything that was on my mind.
"Rei-kun..." she whispered. I loved the way she said my name. It was simply music to my ears. I could hear her say it forever.
"I couldn't take it. When you said you were going overseas to finish university, I wanted to support you. I knew it was best for you to go. I tried my best to be strong but then when you brought up staying there for med school too, I went crazy. I snapped. I couldn't take the idea of not being with you for that long," I admitted, squeezing her hands slightly.
"I... I don't know what to say," she whispered after a period of silence. She was so close to me that I felt her warm breath hit my collarbone. She was close enough for me to kiss her but I didn't dare try that, no matter how much I wanted to.
"You don't have to say anything. I just really needed to get all that out," I stated. It felt as if a huge, overbearing weight had been relieved from my shoulders.
"I- I don't hate you," she said, suddenly.
"Really?" I asked, not really expecting her to say that. She didn't hate me? Even though she left me without a word? Even though she didn't acknowledge my existence for the past few years? She could have fooled me.
"Rei-kun, about that night before I left—"
"Oi, it really is you," a woman's voice said from a few meters off. I looked off to the side and saw a figure coming out of a vehicle and making their approach towards me. As the person came closer, the light from the street lamps illuminated their face. A feeling of dread and the slightest bit of horror washed over me once I recognized who it was.
Shit.
"You never showed up for drinks tonight, what the hell?" Asako's screetchy voice nagged at me. Her hands were on her hips. I saw her eyes dart down to my hands, which were still holding Aya's. She arched an eyebrow at the scene.
"What are you doing here?" I asked, offended by her presence.
"I've been calling you all night. I saw your car pass by while I was at a nearby gas station and wondered what you were up to."
"Asako. Not now," I simply stated. I looked at Aya— her face was confused, needless to say. She softly shook her hands from mine and I internally groaned. There couldn't possibly be a worse time for this wench to show up.
"So, what's the deal? You coming over again tonight?" she asked, making me want to be instantly swallowed by the ground beneath me. I couldn't believe she was saying all this shit in front of Aya. She was doing it intentionally, knowing Asako. "By the way, who's this?" Asako asked as she eyed Aya with a scrutinizing look.
"I'm Hoshino," Aya apprehensively introduced. No, Aya, don't even speak with this sub-human piece of trash.
"You're Hoshino? The Hoshino Aya?" Asako asked, amazed. Yeah, Asako knew of Aya. After all, I still had photos of us in my phone. I never got rid of anything that belonged to her.
"Ah, y- yes. I'm sorry, it seems I'm in the way of your business here," Aya apologized to me as she took a step back. Her eyes reflected a bit of hurt, as if she had just been slapped. Aya, don't leave. You've got it all wrong. God, what a terrible situation.
"Aya, wait, this isn't—" I tried to stop her from entering her apartment but she had already swiftly turned around.
"Goodnight, Rei-kun. I'll... see you around," she bade without looking back. I watched her back retreat, just like during that stormy night. Damn it. My luck is absolutely shitty. Guess this was the universe's way of returning my karma.
"Asako, what the hell?" I turned to her as soon as Aya was within her building.
"What? Did I do something?" she asked maliciously, shrugging and acting as if she hadn't just ruined a pivotal moment with the love of my life.
"Don't try to act all innocent," I spat. "You know Aya was my last serious girlfriend."
"How could I forget when all you do is murmur her name in your sleep? Well, sorry for intruding on your precious time with your beloved ex that you never got over," she said sarcastically. She wasn't the least bit sorry. As a matter of fact, it looked like she enjoyed ruining my life. "I can't believe Hoshino is back. I thought she left you for med school?"
"Just shut up, you don't know anything. Why the hell are you stalking and following me now?" I asked, annoyed beyond anything.
"I didn't stalk you, I just saw you. You weren't picking up my calls all night, so what was I supposed to do?" she said, rolling her eyes. "So are you staying the night or what?"
I rushed to my car, sighing with frustration. I didn't want to speak with this person ever again. I'm going to have to call my agency in the morning. My manager was probably going to be pretty furious with me for letting it get to this point with Asako. No matter how great she was at doing her job, I didn't want to work with this wench another day more.
"Answer me!" she shrieked.
"No. This ends here, whatever the hell this is," I spat. This really was the last straw; I'd had enough.
"Are you breaking up with me?" she asked, offended.
"I don't recall you ever being mine to begin with," I replied, ducking into my car and slamming the door. "And I sure as hell was never yours."
"Rei, You jerk!" she shrieked, obviously angered by my statement. I didn't care, though. This woman meant nothing to me, even if she was my publicist. Now that Aya was back, nothing else mattered to me.
I sped away into the night without ever looking back. I hated leaving Aya on this note, especially since it was her first day home, but now that she was back in the country, I'd luckily have more encounters with her. I'd definitely be able to get my thoughts and feelings across. The thought of being able to see her again soon set my mind at ease.
Rainy Way Back Home
Chapter II — Okaeri
End.
Siopao: Okaeri means welcome home. Please view your thoughts and comments! And happy new year to all!
