A/N: I so easily give in to peer pressure. Lol. I should warn you all,I only have the vaguest idea of what I'm doing here! If you see something off or anything like that, please let me know! Also, I'm going to vent a bit - Sheldon Cooper is a hell of a character to write!

To all of you who reviewed, who marked this as a favorite or followed...wow, just...wow. You guys are amazing! Thank you so much!

Chapter Two

"I find the idea of Amy wearing lip-gloss distasteful because of how agreeable I find the sight of you wearing it, Penny."

The words wouldn't stop repeating themselves in her head, stuck on a constant loop just like that moment where his lips touched hers, softly and hesitantly. Sheldon Cooper had kissed her. Willingly kissed her.

Whatever drunken haze she had attempted to force on herself post-break up had been effectively swept away by that shocking fact. In its place a riot of emotions collided relentlessly against one another. Had it been anyone else – she would have polished off the rest of that wine. But this was Sheldon and for some reason she couldn't bring herself to have anything but a clear mind when it came to thinking about what the hell he'd just done. Because it wasn't just a kiss. It wasn't just some breathless admission. It was a moment that had the power to alter both of their lives entirely.

She shifted on the couch, pulling her phone from her pocket and thumbing through the menu until she found her messenger icon. She had Sheldon's number in her phone but she'd never sent him a text message before. She'd never had a reason to. If she had a question or needed to talk to him about something, she could just waltz across the hall and talk to him. She thought about doing that now and a breathless laugh escaped her. That would go over well, especially if Leonard was there to provide an audience.

"Not going to happen," she muttered, selecting Sheldon's name and opening up a blank message box. Her fingers stumbled through typing out the only question she could really ask him right now.

Sheldon…why?

She stared at it for several moments, hesitating. There was a very large part of her that wanted things to stay the way they were, uninterrupted by confused emotions and lanky physicists. That part wanted to maintain a status quo where everything was simple and she and Leonard went back to being friends. Where she could go into their apartment whenever she pleased and not have to worry about the repercussions of it. Where she could distract herself with men that had no iota of brilliance but were well off enough in bed.

But then there was a different part of her, a new part that apparently had been unleashed by the simple peck of one Dr. Sheldon Cooper. That part of her wanted to know what he meant, wanted to step into unknown waters and be swept away into something challenging, frightening and exhilarating. That part of her was quick to point out how shallow and distasteful the other part was. How everything that part of her wanted sounded cheap and pathetic.

Before she could doubt her actions, she quickly hit send, then tossed the phone aside and stared at it as if it were some alien being standing immobile in her living room. She worried her bottom lip with her teeth, wrung her hands together and reminded herself several times to breathe. This was just Sheldon. He was her friend. She'd known him for years. There was no reason to be so anxious over something as silly as a text message.

Her phone buzzed and she jumped, cursing softly as she reached for it. She unlocked the screen and her breath caught.

Because it's always been you, Penny. And what you said holds a truth I am not able to ignore. Relationships cannot work when they are built on contracts and dishonesty. You would not allow that…neither should I. There's sound logic to your irrational romantics.

A startled laugh escaped her as she read his words over and over. Her irrational romantics – yeah, that was Sheldon alright. Drawing in a deep breath, she held it as she typed her next message.

That's the point. It's me. I'm nowhere near what a woman with you should be. I don't think on your level. I drive you insane. You drive me insane.

She hit send and then called herself a million different kind of stupid. Or she would if there were a million different kinds of stupid. Sheldon would probably know just how many there were. What was she playing at? What was she even doing?

Again her phone buzzed and again, she jumped. She was anticipating text messages from Sheldon. The idea became more and more "out there" with every second that passed.

I'm not doing this through text messages, Penny.

Her heart sank. But he was right. This was a ridiculous thing to pursue through text messages. Or at all. She was out of his league. Way out of his league. And yet…that thought didn't stop her.

Then come back over here.

This time she set the phone down carefully, slowly reaching over to place it on the coffee table and then leaning back. She pressed her hands together and held them up to her face, her fingertips resting against her lips and nose. She kept her gaze fixed on the blackened screen, once again holding her breath as she waited.

Knock, knock, knock. "Penny."

Once, twice-.

On the third, she got to her feet and went to the door, placing her hand on the knob and trying to still the frantic beating of her heart. She told herself it was only because he was her friend and he wanted to cross a line, that she was afraid of destroying a relationship. She ignored the persistent whisper that told her it was more.

Pulling open the door, she looked up into fathomless blue eyes. Without a word, she stepped aside and he walked in. Just like he did a half an hour ago, she thought as she closed it behind them. Except a half an hour ago her heart wasn't pounding in her ears and her mouth didn't feel like the Sahara. She joined him on the couch, keeping her eyes fixed on his hands where they lay folded in his lap.

"Penny," he started, his voice low but still holding that firmness that was so him. "I apologize for my actions. Though I do not regret behaving the way I did, it has become apparent that I may have acted a bit rashly and made you uncomfortable."

"Not uncomfortable," she said quickly, looking up and shaking her head. "I just…Sheldon…when did this…how did this happen?"

"I've always had a fondness for you, Penny. That shouldn't come as a surprise. You're the only one I've allowed to come in my room. With the exception of Amy, you're the only one I've shared a somewhat physical relationship with. You are the only person who's food I willingly eat." He twisted to face her, a small grin tugging at the corners of his mouth. "Do you remember the day you moved in? Leonard invited you over and you referred to me at one of those-."

"Beautiful Mind genius guys," she finished, her voice faint as she remembered the way he'd looked at her. That look that said he was both proud of his work and flattered that she'd given him such a compliment. It had vanished the second later when Leonard had eagerly pointed out his own scientific work, replaced by a stern glare and the clipped tones of someone who felt he was clearly superior. Leonard was the greedy, yapping puppy in the window compared to Sheldon's alpha male pacing restlessly in the wild.

"Leonard is my friend. And it was very clear that he was interested in you. Unwritten social codes dictate that when a friend is interested in a possible conquest, you graciously step aside. The 'bro code' I believe Wolowitz calls it."

"What's changed?"

He studied her, carefully putting together what he was about to say next. She could see the wheels turning in that complicated brain of his.

"You have," he stated simply, looking at her as if he was just figuring the fact out that very second.

"So, what. Now I'm good enough for you?" she said defensively. She felt like their conversation was going in circles with no sustenance to it. If they didn't get to the heart of the entire matter and soon, she was going to shove him out the door, lock it and never entertain the thought of anyone in apartment 4A again.

"I'm not Leonard," he said very simply. "You don't get to pull that hissy fit crap with me."

Penny's eyes went wide and her mouth dropped open slightly. Had he seriously told her she didn't get to pull hissy fit crap with him?

"I know you better than anyone, Penny. And when you walked out of our apartment tonight, I knew it was for good. You had the look of a woman set to take on life single-handedly and I admired you for that. And to be honest, that scared me. I thought if I didn't say or do something, I'd never see you again."

"Sheldon, sweetie…I would still live across the hall," she argued softly.

"Would you?"

She could only look at him, her mouth working to give him an answer. But she couldn't. As she'd walked out on Leonard, she had been actively mapping out an escape plan that involved moving. She had nothing here anymore. No job, no boyfriend. She could be just as successful in another apartment, another suburb…anywhere as far from Leonard as she could get. And she couldn't lie and tell Sheldon she hadn't been thinking that. So instead, she fought the idea of them.

"Look…Sheldon…I'm out of your league. And not in the whole 'hot girl/nerd' sense. You're brilliant. You have this life planned out with Nobel prizes and fame through scientific discovery. I'm just some ex-waitress from the Cheesecake Factory taking no-talent roles in shows that cut me from scenes and hoping for someone to come along and tell me that I've got what it takes. And you have Amy-."

"Who doesn't challenge me," he said, easily cutting her off. "She's my academic equal in every way and we maintain conversation easily enough. Intellectually we are compatible. But she doesn't infuriate me the way you do. She doesn't question me or argue with me or sing 'Soft Kitty' the way you do. With her…I feel pressure to perform to a standard and partake in distasteful activities such as holding hands or cuddling." He looked away then, a faint red staining his cheeks. "When it comes to you…those are all things I want to do."

"Sheldon," she persisted, forcing her voice past the lump of emotion that had formed in her throat. "I'm not good enough for you."

He sighed, pursing his lips slightly, then reached over and took her hands. His skin was cool against hers, the thumb brushing her knuckles causing a sudden and unexpected ache of longing to wrench her heart.

"Might I suggest that you take some time to rediscover yourself? You sell yourself short, Penny. Find the woman I see."

"And if I don't?" she asked, terrified to hear his answer.

He smiled then, one of his rare, boyish grins that she preferred. "Then I will help you find her."

Tears clouded her vision. She drew in a shuddering breath and nodded. "It might seem like I'm avoiding you."

"Luckily, I'm a patient and understanding man."

A watery laugh escaped her and she reached up to swipe impatiently at a tear that had started making its persistent way down her cheek. Together, they stood and she walked him to the door, feeling lighter than she had in years. She felt like she had when she had first moved here – optimistic, slightly shaky, filled with nervous excitement that was only slightly subdued by the bittersweet ache of leaving a life behind.

He turned to face her at the door and her fingers suddenly itched to touch him. Would his hair be as soft as it looked? Would he pull away from her? Or would he lean in and welcome it?

"So, what about us?" she asked.

"In due time," he answered. "Of course, I strongly recommend you give it some serious thought on your road to self-discovery."

"Of course," she echoed, unable to stop the wide grin spreading over her face. "In order to do that, I need to have all of the facts. That's right, isn't it? To form a valid theory I should have something to back it up?"
His eyes narrowed ever-so-slightly. "Something like that," he allowed, drawing it out to the point that it almost sounded as if he were asking her a question.

"I don't think a little peck is enough to backup a theory, Dr. Cooper."

She had the satisfaction of seeing his eyes widen slightly in surprise before she wrapped her hands around the back of his neck, pulled him down and pressed her lips to his. She expected him to resist, to stiffen and balk at the contact. Instead, his hands came to rest lightly on her hips and he tilted his head to the side. He caught her off guard. It was supposed to be the other way around. As she sagged against him though, she couldn't find it in her to care. Her mind went fuzzy and blank, her nerves tingled. She was suddenly seventeen again - standing under the bleachers and getting her first kiss from Edward Thompson, the Captain of the basketball team. Except this was so much better. Sheldon's lips moved against her with an achingly sweet tenderness. She could taste his innocence, his curiosity. He would easily be the thing that fueled her sexual fantasies and that very thought terrified her enough to pull her away from him.

Dragging in a breath, Penny released him, dropping her hands to her side. "Goodnight, Sheldon."

He smiled shyly, grasping the door handle. "Goodnight, Penny."

She closed the door behind him, waited until she heard the door to 4A open and close, then pressed her forehead to the cool wood surface. The road to self-discovery was going to be a hell of a long one if she couldn't stop thinking about how good Sheldon Cooper's lips felt on hers.