Disclaimer: The humor continues, mostly at Marshall's expense of course. And now for the introduction to the two other Shannons that are slowly getting bigger parts in the TV series. (No offense to those who like the Shannons more than Mary and Marshall… I'm objective that way. Sorry.)
Anyway, Here's chapter two. By the way, I love these play on sayings. I'll continue that.
Meet the Parents, Again
"We're here," Mary interrupted as she pulled into the driveway.
She turned off the car, pulled out the keys, and leaned back against her seat with a heavy sigh. It was quiet for a moment as Mary stared at her house, imagining what new surprises she would find as soon as she entered. She didn't like the thought of it.
"We could still go to the movies," Marshall offered as he unlatched his seat belt.
"No," Mary sighed and leaned forward to press her forehead against the steering wheel. "You know how much I hate dark, closed-in places."
"Yeah," Marshall sighed quietly.
Mary didn't trust anyplace that was small with few exits. Call her paranoid, but she wasn't going to risk meeting up with some guy who wanted her dead. She had had enough of those encounters. One such encounter had left Marshall lying on the ground with a bullet in his chest. She didn't want that happening ever again. The very thought of it made her shiver.
"Hey, you're going to be fine," Marshall said, misinterpreting Mary's shiver. He gave her shoulder a sympathetic pat.
Mary turned her head to look at Marshall. He offered her a small smile before opening the door and getting out of the car.
Mary leaned back with a sigh and brushed the hair from her face. She reverted to drumming her fingers nervously on the steering wheel as she watched Marshall walked around the front of the car and stop at her door. He opened the door expectantly.
Mary took a deep breath as her drumming sped up.
"Come on, you've survived situations much worse than going home," he assured.
Mary gave him a disbelieving stare. "If I snap, you better get outta here," she warned. "I'm sure you can escape while I attack my mom."
Marshall chuckled lightly, and with slight concern. "If I go, then who's going to tame you?" he asked half-mockingly.
"Oh, don't worry. The taste of blood will calm me I'm sure," Mary retorted sarcastically.
Marshall made a forced chuckle but his eyes seemed to say that he thought that Mary – and everyone else around – would be safer elsewhere.
"Just kidding," Mary smiled with some effort.
Marshall sighed and looked at Mary sincerely. "You'll be fine." He took Mary's still fidgeting hand and pulled her out of the car.
"Hey, if you get through the day without killing your family, you can have Stan," Marshall offered with renewed sarcasm.
"Deal," Mary smirked. She'd get her revenge later for Stan making her go home long before she actually needed to.
Marshall led Mary to the front door, still towing her by her hand. It unnerved Mary ever-so slightly with a strange mixture of belonging but she shook the feeling away. He was just holding her hand to ensure that she didn't escape. Nothing more.
Still…
Mary pulled her hand out of Marshall's grasp and knocked on the door – with a little too much force than necessary. Marshall glanced at her. She didn't quite get the look in his eyes but he turned away before she could figure it out.
They waited, side-by-side, as a loud flurry of noises emerged from behind the door. The sounds were a cacophony of curses, banging pots, and some hurried feet. Apparently, there had been some sort of surprise party or celebration that Mary was unaware of that was currently being cleaned up.
Mary was going to kill them. Here she was, working hard in a dangerous job day in and day out, and her mom and sister were just lounging around, having party's, and spending Mary's hard-earned money. Oh, yeah, there was going to be hell to pay.
"Have I thanked you yet for coming with me?" Mary asked through clenched teeth. Marshall would at least ensure that no deaths came up on her record.
"I can't recall how long ago the last one was," Marshall replied smugly. He was enjoying this a little too much.
"Well then, thank-you for coming with me and I'd appreciate it if you stay in the same room with me at all times," Mary seethed as a crashing sound came from within followed by another string of curses.
"So, I should keep a firm grip on your leash?" Marshall asked, raising a brow.
"Not the metaphor I was going for but that would probably be for the best," Mary answered.
"All right."
Marshall slipped his arm through Mary's and pushed his fingers through her clenched fist. He slid closer to her so that her shoulder was touching his upper arm. Mary froze and her former tensions were washed away to be replaced with this new unexpectance.
"What are you doing?" she asked slowly, keeping her eyes forward.
"Keeping a hold on your leash," Marshall replied smartly. She could hear his smile.
"You idiot," Mary hissed and pulled her arm out of Marshall's hold. She slapped his arm, making him back away in defense. A small smile was still evident on his face.
"I thought that's what you wanted," he explained, holding his hands up to fend off Mary's attacks.
"Not like that!" Mary shot back, her voice rising. "You don't have to… touch me, just tell me to relax… or something! We're not a couple."
Her voice had almost risen to a yell and when her tyrant was over, there was silence on the other side of the door. Marshall watched her calmly, his smile still sparkling mischievously in his eyes.
"Relax," he commanded.
"Unbelievable," Mary muttered with a disapproving shake of her head.
"Mary!" an over-excited voice squealed as the front door opened.
Mary snapped her attention to the new arrival; plastering a smile on her face.
Her mother rushed out on her high heels and embraced Mary lovingly with the occasional pat on the back. Then she stepped back and looked Mary over, slight displeasure crossing her face.
Jinx was one who loved fashion and jewels. She always decorated herself in the newest fad of an outfit complete with jewelry and perfume. It was how she got men into the house. But a relationship never lasted with her. Maybe that was why Mary dressed plainly: more of a tomboy than a girl. Jinx was always trying to get her to put on something "pretty" that usually included frills or bows. Mary always denied.
Even now, Jinx was wearing a thrown-on pair of khakis and a non-matching floral shirt that dipped down to expose some of her full chest. An elaborate pearl necklace was askew on her chest. Her hair was also in slight disarray. Same old mom.
"And she brought Marshall," Jinx squeaked with a clap of her hands. She shuffled to Marshall and wrapped her arms around him in a hug. Marshall patted her hesitantly on her back as Jinx stroked his.
"Marshall's here?" a new voice asked.
Mary turned back to the door to see her sister, Brandi, emerge; dressed in the same hurried fashion as Jinx. She had on embarrassingly short shorts that showed off her tan, fit legs and a slimming tank top. She wore no jewelry but plenty of make-up to replace it. Like mother, like daughter.
"We're always glad to have you visit," Jinx said, Marshall still trapped in her embrace.
"Glad to Miss Shannon," Marshall said uncertainly. He was starting to fidget in Jinx's grasp.
"Please, how many times do I how to tell you to call me Jinx?" Jinx asked as she released Marshall to stare up at him affectionately.
Marshall smiled hesitantly, his eyes shifting to Mary for assistance.
"And you can still call me Brandi," Brandi said as she strutted over to stand next to Marshall. She looked him over approvingly and stopped to smile at his face. Marshall smiled back half-heartedly.
Mary rolled her eyes and clapped her hands to gain attention. "All right, here's the deal," she stated in her professional voice. "Marshall and I are here to take a day off. So I-" she saw Marshall's frantic wave "-we would like a calm visit minus any boyfriend or sexual talks.
"We'd also like a clean room to relax in with some snacks." Snacks were good. If she didn't want to talk, all she had to do was throw a handful of some sweet treat into her mouth.
Mary finished with a reassuring nod at Marshall. He gave her a grateful nod in return.
Jinx and Brandi exchanged worried glances.
"Well, I'll get your room ready," Brandi offered and hurried inside after giving a quick wink to Marshall.
"And I'll get your snacks," Jinx piped and hurried after Brandi. "Champagne?" she asked quickly.
"No," Mary and Marshall said forcefully.
Jinx nodded sadly and turned back to enter the house; closing the door behind her.
It was quiet again except for the occasional crash and flurry of words.
"So," Marshall sighed heavily as he moved back to stand with Mary. "We suffer together, huh?"
"That's' right," Mary replied curtly. "Thanks again."
"I'll admit, I'm starting to have doubts."
"No escaping now. You're already involved."
"And whose fault is that?"
Mary flashed Marshall a somewhat apologetic smirk that contained little relief at the fact that he was staying. It would be easier to survive the day with him taking some of the attention off of her. Sure it was cruel and Marshall might be scarred for life, but they were partners. It came with the job.
"I should sue for cruelty and violation of human rights," Marshall joked, trying to pull off an adequate glare at Mary.
"Ha, ha," Mary sneered as she met his gaze. She couldn't help but smile.
"Ready," Brandi exclaimed as she flung the door open on the staring contest.
"Oh, I'm sorry," she said sheepishly. "Are you two busy?"
"No!" Mary and Marshall replied as one, although Mary's was a little more forceful. She exchanged looks with an amused Marshall.
"Good," Brandi scoffed and grabbed Marshall's arm, dragging him inside. "Then let's go."
Mary smiled and followed Marshall into her house, closing the door behind her.
"You owe me," Marshall mouthed to her as Brandi led them to a smaller room.
Uh-oh. Are Brandi and Marshall going to hook up? J/K I know Brandi and Marshall aren't a good couple and they're not going to be. There's an explanation for her actions in the next chapter. Bear with me and review. Thanks.
P.S.: I'll try to get at least two chapters in per day.
