Dipper pulled out a laptop he had stored somewhere under the kitchen table. He got the screensaver to turn off and launched straight into the presentation.

A lot of the basics were familiar to Wirt from being around Dipper and Bill so much. When it came to the safety measures to guard against something going wrong, he hadn't realized that there were so many. Or that several of them, Dipper had devised himself.

"Well, yeah, I mean, I didn't go into this blind," Dipper said when Wirt commented on it. "I know how Bill can be and the best way to deal with his worst aspects, is to prevent him from showing them." Dipper moved on to the next slide, which was covered with complicated looking symbols. "I know he cares about both of us but I also know that he doesn't care about this world, or the people in it, or human morality in general." He smiled at Wirt who struggled to return it. The whole thing, with Bill having a different set of ideals from any human, continued to be difficult for Wirt to grasp. He just couldn't wrap his head around how Bill saw the world. There was the surface level knowledge that he had gleamed from his partners but he lacked the in-depth understanding Dipper seemed to have.

Dipper noticed something was off. "Hey, it's ok. He won't intentionally hurt you. Bill's been semi-regularly possessing me for over a decade now and I'm fine. He knows what he's doing."

"You complain about how he leaves your body on the floor sometimes, though," Wirt pointed out.

Dipper gave a wry smile. "I never said he wasn't an asshole, just that he knows what human bodies can and can't survive. And hey," Dipper lifted himself from his slouch and flashed one his more charming grins. "I don't know if you know this, but I'm kind of the leading expert on demons."

Wirt attempted to return the grin but his heart was beating so hard all of sudden that he was sure he failed. "Sounds like I'm in good hands."

"The best." Dipper's eyes flitted down and Wirt could feel himself blush. It was ridiculous. His reactions were ridiculous. They had been sharing a bed every night for months now, had been intimate before that. It shouldn't get to him but it did. Dipper got to him.

"I, um." He paused to collect himself. "Weren't we talking about something important?"

"Am I distracting you?"

"Yes," Wirt breathed and it was Dipper's turn to color and look away.

"Uh, that's, that's um, ok." He got the far away expression that meant he was communicating with Bill. "So, he wants us to not get distracted by our mammalian urges and get on with the presentation."

"Right, well I guess there's time for that later." Wirt worked hard not to react to the long, warm look Dipper gave him. "What are these?" he pointed at the screen.

"Those," Dipper said, turning his focus back to the PowerPoint, "are some of the counter measures I was talking about. Most of these are just stuff we can draw on you to keep Bill from getting more access than you want him to. I mean, if he decides to be a dick about it and look for loopholes in your deal, which I doubt he'll do, but." Dipper shrugged.

The symbols weren't horrible to look at, and Wirt supposed he wouldn't mind having them on him somewhere. "Why do you think that?"

"Because he wants this, and he knows that if he fucks with you once he gets it, I won't be letting him anywhere near you again."

This was the kind of fierce devotion that had scared Wirt at first. It still hit him hard just how protective Dipper got over things, and people, he cared about. He had had his doubts: if Bill got a body, Wirt would somehow be less important. Because Bill and Dipper went so far back, because they shared a connection Wirt couldn't even understand, let alone be a part of. It was obvious to him now that he had been wrong. Dipper wouldn't view Wirt as less if he got to interact with Bill in the physical realm, because Dipper had thought from the start that Wirt had intrinsic value, separate from any relationship with Bill.

This wouldn't be like it was with the beast; he would still be himself and cared for.

"I think I'll do it," Wirt said.

Dipper looked like he had trouble keeping up. "Oh, um, you will?"

"I mean, not right now but, yes."

The way Dipper's eyes lit up made the uncertainty worth it. "Thank you," he launched to hug Wirt. "Seriously man, you are the best boyfriend. The most understanding person in general."

Wirt hugged back. "Don't thank me yet, I still have questions." He barely even noticed Dipper slump against him before the body pulled back with a grin too wide to be Dipper's.

"Lemme answer them for you!" Bill shouted in his face.

"Bill, I am right here." There was about two inches between their faces. At this rate, Wirt would be deaf before thirty.

"Yeah, what's you point?" The demon leaned even closer. "If you still want to kiss this body, now's your chance."

"No thanks. We're kind of in the middle of something, here." Not that he didn't want to kiss Dipper but this wasn't Dipper right now.

"Okay! So," Bill got comfortable right where he was, like having a serious conversation while hanging off of someone was normal. "Ask me anything."

Resigned, Wirt asked, "What's the meaning of life?"

Bill didn't miss a beat, "To carry out a bunch of meaningless actions in an uncaring universe until you stop existing."

"That's not what you said the last time," Wirt pointed out. "And we're getting off topic again."

"Your fault." Bill frowned, "Also this body is really hormonal right now. Did you for real get better looking in the last five seconds or is there something wrong with this brain?"

Wirt fought down a blush. Not well, but it was the effort that counted. "Maybe there's just something wrong with your perception."

"No, that's not it." Bill looked like he gave the problem some thought before getting back on track. "A n y way! I want to take over your body, you're okay with it, so what's the hold up?"

"I want to know why you want to," Wirt said, as level as he could. "I know Dipper's side of it but what about you? Why did you just bring it up yesterday? You've never expressed any desire to before, why now?"

Bill glanced up with a sigh, as though asking for strength. "Pilgrim," he said. "Pilgrim, seriously."

Wirt leaned away. "What?"

"I am going to speak very slowly so you can keep up," Bill said, moving to put his hands on both sides of Wirt's face to make sure he was following. "Last fall, you almost got taken over by an entity. We weren't in great terms at first. Pine Tree was extremely protective of you because of those two reasons. If I had brought this up any sooner, you wouldn't have even considered it. Pine Tree would not have sided with me on it." Bill gave Wirt's head a small shake. "Do you understand what I am telling you?"

It took Wirt a moment to suppress his anger at being condescended to, and to actually process what Bill was saying. "That's both really considerate and selfish of you."

"Thanks!"

They talked about possession until Wirt felt like his tongue would fall off. Bill was relentless in answering all of his questions, and Wirt started to see that the demon had put a lot of thought into the matter. Particularly to convincing Wirt to agree. Despite all the information Bill was ready to give, getting Dipper on his side had been the deciding factor.

"Look, Bill, we're not going to do it today," Wirt informed the demon on his lap. "Just let me up. I need to email my editor and get some writing done." It had been a slow process but with a little help from Dipper and his publisher, Wirt had managed to form some connections of his own.

"You can write whenever, you haven't seen me in weeks," Bill argued. "Don't you want to hang out with your favorite demon?"

"Saying that you're my favorite demon is like saying that skin cancer is my favorite cancer."

"But I am your favorite, though right?" Bill didn't let it go. Wirt didn't know why he had expected him to; Bill never let anything go.

"Fine, yes, you're my favorite. But I still need to work." He gave Bill a shove, not hard because he didn't want to harm Dipper's body but hard enough to get himself some space. "Now get off of me. I promise I'll go over some of the counter measures with Dipper later, and we can figure out the details together."

Bill eyed him. "Alright." Wirt saw the grin come back just before Bill pecked him on the lips and got up. "I have some work to do, too. See ya!" With that, he was out. Wirt sat where Bill had left him, blinking. Trying to process everything that had just happened proved futile so he escaped to his work for a few hours.

The sound of the door closing snapped him back to reality. He had just been considering which of his latest pieces he would show to his therapist. Last week, during his appointment, she had asked about his poetry again and Wirt had finally agreed to bring some for her. He knew that soon, if things went well, people would be able to read his writing but that didn't mean he wanted to be in the same room as they did.

Dipper walked in and threw himself on the armchair. He looked worn out, twigs stuck in his hair and a new tear on his jeans.

"What did he do?" Wirt asked.

"There was a thing, in the woods." Dipper gestured to the outdoors before letting his arm flop back down. "Apparently, some of the more sapient creatures are building a fence to keep the tourists out," he explained. "There's like this solar thing and they don't want humans in parts of the forest because of it."

Wirt watched Dipper sink lower on the chair. It was clear that he was tired but there was something else. "Is it bad?"

"No, not really. I'd fence myself off too if that was an option, I just." He sighed, closed his eyes for a moment. "I can't believe I missed it, you know? Every spring it's something so stuff going missing is normal. Usually it's just someone building a nest for their future offspring or something so I didn't think it'd be something else, but I should have." He regarded Wirt with a hollow look. "What if it had been something bad? What if the next time I miss something, it's life threatening?"

"Oh, Dipper, don't go there." Wirt got up and went to Dipper who rearranged himself so they could both sit on the armchair. "Hey," Wirt combed away the stray twigs from Dipper's hair with his fingers. "If it had been life or death, you would've noticed. The only reason this got past you is that it was such a small, nonthreatening thing."

"How do you know that?" Dipper leaned on him, letting himself relax just a touch.

"Because I know you."

For a moment, Dipper just looked at him like what he had said wasn't registering. Then, slowly, he came back to himself, a small smile playing in the corners of his eyes. "What did I do to deserve you."

Wirt smiled back, brighter. "I don't know if you remember, but you sort of saved me just last fall. But," he leaned closer, so that their foreheads were touching, "I'll tell you a secret."

Dipper made a small, curious noise and waited.

"I already liked you way before that," Wirt whispered. His heart leaped when Dipper's smile widened.

They stayed there, close and smiling for a few moments. Then, Wirt remembered that Dipper was still exhausted. He leaned back a little, laughing when Dipper followed. "Come on, it's warm shower and bed for you next."

"But what about the cuddling and research I have planned?" Dipper argued.

"I think we can fit the cuddling in your schedule but the research will have to wait."

After disentangling, Wirt maneuvered Dipper to the bathroom and headed to the attic. It was early for turning in but Dipper needed the rest. Who was Wirt to deny him cuddles?

Shower fresh and relaxed, Dipper climbed in next to Wirt and molded himself into him. "Mmh, hey?" Dipper asked.

"Hey?"

"Have you thought about what kind of a deal you want to make? With Bill?"

Wirt wasn't eager to talk about the deal right then, but Dipper was so warm and pliable that he relented. "I thought it'd be a one time thing, at least at first, and that I'd write down what I'm going to say. Maybe show it to you so you can look it over?" He felt Dipper nod, and nod off.


It was weird, looking at himself from the outside. Wirt wasn't sure he liked it. They had sat his body on the worn couch in the living room, Dipper had checked that he was ok with the proceedings for what felt like the millionth time, and he had felt his soul, or mind essence or whatever concept formed his self, being yanked out of his body.

A string connected him from the symbol on his physical wrist to the corresponding spot on his spirit. With the string, he could pull himself in at any time and Bill would be forced out. It was the precaution he had been the most comfortable with, not wanting to be locked inside while Bill operated his limbs. Free floating in the air wasn't so bad.

Wirt watched his body, Bill, blink a couple times and look at his hands. Bill wiggled his fingers, stretched his neck, and turned his head to look at Wirt.

"How you doing, Pilgrim?" Wirt's mouth formed the words but it wasn't his voice. Or it was, but there was Bill's echo behind it, the rhythm of his speech different. It was him, his likeness, it wasn't Wirt. The yellow eyes were the most obvious physical difference. What further set it apart from what Wirt saw in the mirror was the expression, the confident grin, the scheme just behind the eyes. The way Bill carried his body. Wirt hadn't known he could look like that.

"Pilgrim?"

"Is there something wrong?" Dipper asked, glancing at where Bill was looking. "Is he ok?"

Wirt snapped out of his wonder to answer, "Yeah, yes I'm fine, I think, it's just strange, is all." His voice echoed.

"He's fine, Pine Tree. A little less articulate than normal, though." Bill winked at Wirt with Wirt's face.

"Please don't do that," Wirt said.

The demon grinned all the wider. Something shifted in Wirt. This wasn't him, the body, he was Wirt. The fleshy part sitting on the couch was Bill now.

"Wirt, just, if it gets too weird, tag in any time," Dipper said to the air a little left of where Wirt was floating.

"I will, don't worry."

"He says we're okay to proceed," Bill said, turning to look at Dipper. He stood up, swayed. "Wow, this body's taller than I'm used to." Bill jiggled a leg, bent the knees. Testing how to operate his new flesh puppet. When that was done to his satisfaction, his eyes found Dipper's again. "Well hello there. I gotta say looking down at you like this is kinda fun."

Dipper's eyes were the widest Wirt had ever seen them. He swallowed. "Hi"

Bill laughed. "So this is what it takes to shut you up. You should see your face, it's hilarious! Your eyes! Do you think that if someone hit you on the back of the head, they'd pop out?"

Wirt made a face. Good to get some confirmation that Bill was a creepy bastard no matter which of them he was with.

It took a moment longer for Dipper to recover enough to shoot Bill a disgusted look. "Dude, no, that's not how eyes work."

"Whatever!" Bill spread his arms. "You have me here now, what next?"

"I, uh." Dipper looked at a loss now that he had what he had asked for. "I guess we'll hug?"

Without further ceremony, they did. Bill stepped closer and closed his arms, now with Dipper inside. Dipper let out a startled, high noise, blushed, and wrapped his arms around Bill.

Two things occurred to Wirt. First, if he had wondered what it would look like when two people who had apparently never hugged anyone tried it for the first time, he didn't anymore. Second, he was witnessing something that should have been a private moment. He was too curious and paranoid to turn around but he tried not to look directly at them.

"Is this everything you ever dreamed of?" Bill asked, still stiff but grinning like the lunatic he was.

"Are you serious right now? This is the worst hug I've ever been a part of," Dipper stated. "What gives? I've seen you hang off Wirt. I know you know how to do this."

"We're being watched. Maybe I have stage fright."

Dipper snorted. "Bullshit. You're made of showmanship and children's nightmares." For a moment he looked like he wanted to snark at Bill some more but then, a thought, "Unless you don't want to? I mean you seemed on board before but if this is uncomfortable for you..."

"Aww, Pine Tree, no."

"Then hug me like you're trying to show Wirt how to do it."

That spurred Bill into action. He tightened the circle of his arms, moving one to the small of Dipper's back and the other to the back of his head. As a final touch, he buried his nose in Dipper's hair by his temple and breathed in. Dipper clung to the the back of Bill's, Wirt's, shirt. "You know, Pine Tree," Bill said, softer than Wirt had thought him capable. "Even if this made me uncomfortable, there aren't a lot of things I wouldn't do for you."

Dipper buried his face where neck met shoulder. "Bill, I..."

"Mind you, a lot of this is just this body's weird human mating urges talking, but I would literally give you the world if you asked me for it, do you think a hug is too much?"

Wirt wasn't sure he could blush in his spirit form. He sure felt like trying.

"No you wouldn't," Dipper replied but there wasn't much force behind it. "I could maybe talk you into sharing."

Bill laughed too loud considering how close he was to Dipper's ear. Dipper pulled back, frowning and rubbing at it.

"I know you have no volume control but, ow, Bill."

"Oops!" The demon didn't look sorry. "I forgot."

"Well, now I know you're lying," Dipper said but it lacked the kind of venom associated with a statement like that.

"You can always tell, you're so smart for a human." Bill ran his knuckles down Dipper's cheek.

"Hearing you flatter me like that, makes me think you want something." He didn't look like he minded.

"This isn't about what I want this time, Pine Tree."

When their noses touched and Dipper's eyes started fluttering shut, Wirt panicked. The hugging and casual contact he had been fine with but this was going too far, too fast.

"Bill!" he shouted, voice higher than usual. The demon controlling his body froze. "You, you need to back off. I don't, I'm not, just." Words failed him. "Please."

To Wirt's relief, Bill listened. Dipper noticed that something was up, too.

"Bill? Is it Wirt? What-?" He went pale, jumped back. "Oh shit, I'm so sorry," he babbled, eyes searching for the spot Wirt was in, "this isn't what we agreed on, I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking."

It was Bill who sat the body down and yanked Wirt back in. Disoriented, during his first few seconds back in corporeal form, all Wirt did was stare ahead. Dipper was speaking.

"Wirt, Wirt, are you alright? Please talk to me."

Wirt forced his eyes to focus, then turned them on Dipper who looked about as close to panicking as Wirt had been moments earlier. "Dipper," Wirt managed. His voice sounded strange to him. "I'm fine now, I think." He frowned. The muscles of his face pulled at the skin around his eyebrows. "For a second there, it was just too intimate for Bill to be doing with my body," he went on, getting used to his voice again. "I thought it might be ok but when you..."

"It's ok, you're ok. How are you feeling?" Dipper asked, having crouched in front of Wirt so that they were eye to eye but not touching.

Wirt blinked at him. Eyelids were weird. "Tired. I'm so tired, suddenly." They had talked about it, Dipper had warned him that housing Bill could wear him out. "Can you take me upstairs? I don't want to sleep down here."

"Of course." Dipper helped him him up. Up from the couch, then up the stairs. Wirt was half asleep by the time they got to their bedroom. He felt like he floated to the bed but knew it was just Dipper laying him down.

"Is Bill around?" Wirt mumbled, "Tell him I'm not angry with him, he stopped." He pried his eyes open enough to see Dipper's concerned face looking down at him. He smiled. "I'm not angry with you, either." He slept.