Characters borrowed from S. Meyer
Chapter 2:
Bella
I was in the guest bedroom for a few minutes when Rose came to find me.
"Can I come in?" she asked lightly.
"Not right now, Rose, I'm not in the mood for a lecture," I said, focusing on my hands in my lap.
"He's an asshole, B."
"He's not an asshole, he's just being honest. He can do what he wants," I reasoned. "We're not together, he's allowed to say those things. If he wants to fuck every bimbo from here to Timbuktu he can."
Rosalie placed her arms over my shoulders and pulled me in for a hug.
"Just because he can doesn't mean he should. You let him walk all over you, B. We accept the love we think we deserve and you definitely don't deserve that."
"He doesn't walk all over me, Ro. And I can't help it, he's got this hold over me. Every time I tell myself I'm going to get over him he does something to pull me back in. Like last week when I was on my period he brought me tampons and brownies," I laughed lowly. "Then we sat on the couch and watched The Office series finale for the billionth time and he let me cry all over him. It was really sweet."
"I thought he went out with Eric that night," Rosalie said.
"He did. After he left my house he met up with Eric and they went to some bar downtown," I mumbled, never looking up from my hands.
"Wait isn't that the night they set up that double date?"
"I guess. I don't really know."
"Liar."
"Woah, take it down a notch, Rose."
"You can't keep doing this to yourself. Either tell him how you feel or stop making yourself so available. You can't let him be at your place acting all involved and then let him waltz right into another girls bed that same night."
"He never said he hooked up with the girl," I protested.
Rosalie shot me a disbelieving face, "So you really think he just went out with this girl and had drinks and didn't try to sleep with her? This is Edward we're talking about, of course they hooked up."
"Well whatever they did, I don't want to know about it. It's none of my business," I sighed, wiping the tears threatening to fall.
Rosalie hugged me again and said, "You're amazing and any guy would be lucky to have you, babe."
"Yeah, just not the one I want."
Rosalie gave my shoulders one last squeeze before saying "Come on, it's almost time for dessert."
As I reemerged Edward's eyes immediately caught mine. He gave me a questioning look before I waved him off.
I resumed my seat and mustered every ounce of energy I had into playing it cool. I picked at my food and tried to hold normal conversation, and when everyone had finished eating I offered to clear the dishes.
"I'll help!" Edward offered, jumping up from the table to grab the dishes from my hands that I'd already collected. I handed the plates over silently and set my attention to the rest of the spread.
By the time I reached the kitchen he was already leaning against the sink waiting for me.
"Is that it?"
"That's everything," I confirmed, placing the stack of flatware in the sink. "Would you mind grabbing the cheesecake?"
"Sure," he drawled, going to pull the dessert from the fridge. He placed it on the counter in front of me while I grabbed a knife.
"Everything ok?" he asked, coming to stand shoulder to shoulder with me.
"Yep."
"You hardly touched your dinner," he observed aloud.
I merely shrugged, "I wasn't super hungry."
He nudged my arm with his, "Ohh come on, tell me what's up."
"Nothing's up," I leveled him with a nonchalant glance, starting to plate the servings of cheesecake. I could feel his gaze burning a hold in the side of my head, imploring me to look at him.
I didn't, because I still wasn't ready to face his beautiful features as they told me what a great friend I was.
He was about to say something when Ben interrupted us, "Hey did you see where Ang put that bottle of wine you brought?"
"I think she might have put it away already," I said, pointing to the wine fridge.
"Great. You guys want a glass?" he questioned, grabbing glasses from the cabinet.
"Sure."
"No, thanks. I'm actually not feeling that great so I think I'll head home," I elaborated, handing Edward a few of the plates of cheesecake plates before taking some myself.
"You're leaving? How are you getting home?" Edward asked in surprise.
I shrugged casually and brought the plates out to the living room where everyone was just starting a round of Cards Against Humanity.
"Ooh, thank you!" Alice cooed, pulling her plate from my hand.
"You're very welcome," I chuckled at her enthusiasm.
"Oh Edward, since you're up can you grab us some forks?" Emmett asked.
"And the bottle opener! We put it in one of the drawers but I don't remember which one," Angela added.
"No problem."
When I'd finished dropping off everyone's plates announced my departure, knowing that I had to do it while Edward or I'd risk him trying to come with me. I needed this time away from him, though, time to wallow in my sadness without having to put up a front for him.
"Thank you for everything Ang, it was lovely as usual. Ben, let me know when you get the word on the Marcs client, yeah?" I leaned down to hug the couple simultaneously before focusing my attention to Alice and Rosalie.
"Lunch tomorrow, ladies?"
A few hugs and fist bumps later and I was out the door towards Edward's place.
Twenty minutes later I had picked up my car and I was back in my apartment getting ready for bed. It was only fifteen minutes to nine but I was ready to call it a night. I looked forward to nothing more than the spare bottle of wine Edward bought and a DVR full of The Mindy Project. At half-passed the hour I heard the jingle of keys in the door and groaned. The only person who regularly used their key to my place was Edward, and I still wasn't in the mood to deal with him. I snuggled down into my sea of pillows and blankets with zero intention of coming out.
"B?" he started slowly, pushing the bedroom door open to reveal his 6'2 frame standing in the doorway.
I stared quietly at the TV, ignoring him, and then I heard him sigh. I also heard the sound of keys dropping on my bedside table.
"I know you're not asleep," he said.
I rolled my eyes and did not break my stare.
He walked around the bed and knelt on the floor in front of me.
"You're intruding on my sacred Mindy Project time" I protested lowly.
"Tough shit," he bit back, clicking the satellite box off with the remote from my bedside.
"Stop," I protested, sitting up and reaching for the remote.
Edward lightly tossed the object on the TV stand behind him and returned his attention to me.
"Not until you talk to me," he demanded. "You've barely said anything to me all night."
"Maybe I just ran out of things to say. We've literally been talking all day," I said, looking innocently up at him, hoping he wouldn't push me any further.
He barreled on, "Is it about me?"
I didn't give him any indication that it was or wasn't about him. Even though it totally was, and he knew it.
"B you have to tell me. How can I apologize when I fuck up if you don't let me know?" he reasoned, his words muffled because his head was buried in the mattress.
"I'm a girl, I'm allowed to make you suffer and pretend that you'll figure it out on your own," I whined, turning over and burrowing deeper into the covers.
"Fine," he said, and I heard a rustle of movement behind me. "If you won't come out then you're going to force me to come in."
He had stripped down and was pulling back the covers to take the spot beside me.
I didn't move as I felt the bed dip. He switched off the bedside lamp and scooted closer to me. He always did this. Whenever I was upset with him he pretty much went all "Occupy Bella", suffocating me with his presence until I was compelled to tell him what was wrong.
He threw his arm over my body and I felt the familiar tingle at the bottom of my stomach despite myself. The man had an effect on me, there was no denying that. I always unraveled as soon as he touched me.
He rested his chin on my shoulder and rubbed my stomach with his hands. The skin jumped at his touch and I closed my eyes, willing myself to calm down. It was impossible to ignore him when he was this close to me.
"Please talk to me," he begged, pulling me closer into his hard form.
I sighed before asking, "Can we just drop it? I'm over it. It's not even your fault, I'm just in a bad mood."
I had to admit that I had mood swings every once in awhile. Well, to everyone else they looked like mood swings. I knew that they were really just a result of me beating myself up about Edward.
Edward buried his face in my neck and whined, "No, don't do that. You always bottle it up when you're mad at me. You're supposed to tell me everything, it's in the best friends handbook."
I squealed at the sensation of his facial hair rubbing against my neck.
"Your beard is tickling me, stop!"
He rubbed his face a little more vigorously into the crook of my neck and I laughed, turning over to push him as far away from that area as I could. When I turned to face him he was smiling.
"There she is," he said tenderly and I smiled back at him slightly, despite myself.
"I don't like you," I said stubbornly.
He laughed, "I know. You love me."
"I do," I said slowly, those words carrying more weight than he knew.
"And I love you too," he affirmed, bopping me on the nose with his finger.
I scrunched my face and shook my head, urging myself not to fall for his charms. This shit got me in trouble every time.
"Since you won't tell me what you're mad about can you at least forgive me for whatever the hell it was that I did to piss you off tonight?" he asked innocently, propping his head up on his hand. After a moment I nodded silently and leaned in to hug him.
"Don't I always?"
"You do and that's why you're my number one," he said, hugging me back. "Now, about these TV choices. They're questionable at best."
"Hey!" I shouted, slapping him on the arm and he pretended to shy away from me.
"What? I can't help that you don't have good taste. We need to be watching a classic on a night like this, like The Godfather or something."
I rolled my eyes, "Absolutely not. We put up with the classics at your house but my house is light and fun, so we'll at least have to watch something funny. Besides, I don't remember inviting you to watch anything with me," I huffed, pushing the covers back. I walked out of the room wordlessly and Edward followed suit, scooting out of the bed as well.
"Fine, I'll choose something in between. A classic comedy perhaps?" he went over to the DVD collection.
The apartment was silent for a few minutes before he yelled, "Damn we have to make it a point to hit up Best Buy tomorrow. You need some more options, Swan."
"How about we skip the movie? We haven't finished Parks and Rec yet!" I yelled from the bathroom down the hall.
"Oh yeah," he shouted, the sound of his feet thumping to my office to grab my laptop echoing through the apartment.
When I found Edward again he had arranged our normal setup: laptop on the bed with every pillow I owned stacked against the headboard.
"Would you like a drink?" I asked mischievously, raising one eyebrow slightly.
Edward eyeballed me before realizing what I was saying.
"Oh no, I can't, not tonight. The shit you make always fucks me up. It's Thursday for crying out loud, I have to be at work tomorrow," he pleaded, but I just continued to smile.
"Oh come on, I've gotten so much better at mixing! It won't be that much. I found this new website and they show you how to mix stuff and it's great. Trust me," I ran out the room again and Edward shouted for me to quiet down all the sounds of glasses and bottle clinking together.
After making a few of my new recipes I returned to my bedroom with a tray of 6 shot glasses, all mixed differently. Back in my sophomore year of college I practiced mixing drinks for when I would go out. Edward would be my guinea pig but most of the time we just ended up sick. He had yet to let those unfavorable memories go.
"Dear God," Edward said in an astonished voice. "What have you done?"
I smiled mischievously and handed him his first shot.
"Bottoms up!"
Edward grimaced as he downed the first mix but found out it was surprisingly good. "Jager mixed with malibu and pineapple juice" I exclaimed. "Not too bad, right?"
"Not bad at all. You're taking the next one." He selected a bright green shot and handed it to me.
"Oh this one's good, its called The Irish Trash Can," I said, throwing it back. "Curacao, vodka, gin, triple sec, rum, peach schnapps and Redbull. I made one for you too."
I handed him the third glass.
"Not a fan, what's next? By the way, don't ever tell me that I don't love you. Only a crazy person would seriously sit here and try this." Edward grumbled, reaching for a pair of double shot glasses that looked similar.
"I know, thank you," I smiled. "Ok this one is….triple sec, orange juice and cherry vodka."
"Where the fuck do you get cherry vodka?" he mused, tipping his head back and finishing off the shot
"Leftover from a party we had at work. No one wanted it so I took it. This is the first time I've ever used it! I have to admit its pretty good. What do you think?" I questioned him.
He held his stomach, "Just the thought of mixing all of these is starting to make me queasy."
"Pussy," I teased, handing him one final double shot glass.
"Last one."
He looked at it warily before downing the shot and a few seconds later he coughed slightly.
I cackled, "Double shot of 1800."
"A little warning would've been nice," he glared at me. "You know I hate taking straight shots, they're terrible."
I threw my head back and laughed harder, "I know, that's why I poured it. I don't understand what it is with you and your cocktails."
"They're delicious and you can enjoy them without getting too fucked up."
I shook my head in disapproval at him, "You are such a wimp. How did I end up with you as my drinking partner? I swore I trained you so much better than this."
He flipped me the bird in response.
Half an hour later we were both buzzing.
"God, your tits are huge," Edward observed as we battled each other in Wii tennis.
"Edward!" I exclaimed, trying to cover my breasts with one hand and swing the controller with the other.
"I'm just saying, I can't ignore them. That's what happens when you play a game and don't wear a bra."
"Fuck off, I'm in my own damn house. If you don't want to see them then go home!" I swung and my mii hit a speeding ball past Edward's mii's head, effectively ending the game.
"Damn," he muttered at his defeat, tossing the controller on the couch. "I didn't say I didn't want to see them."
The butterflies that had been a permanent fixture in my stomach for more than a decade started to flutter. I examined his face for any sign of joking but he looked about as serious as a heart attack. He gulped and glanced back down at my chest.
"And I can see your nipples," he said gravely. After a beat of silence we both burst out into laughter.
"Why do you sound so upset about it?" I gasped through my uncontrollable laughter.
"Because I've never seen them before."
I glanced down at my chest, and they were definitely making an appearance. The fact that Edward was talking about them wasn't helping. Just the thought of Edward and my nipples made them go a little bit harder.
"They're normal."
"They're not. As weird as this sounds they actually look kind of…perfect. And trust me, I would know. I've seen more than my fair share." He breathed.
If there was anything that would slow my arousal, that was it. The mention of other girls he'd been with had effectively killed any sexy vibes.
"Right," I said as I cleared my throat. "Parks and Rec?"
Edward nodded enthusiastically and started fucking giggling, all talk of my nipples effectively forgotten.
"I've never heard you giggle. You're such a light weight; you're more tipsy than I am," I accused him playfully.
"Only because you poured me that extra double shot. I'm gonna feel like shit in the morning," he grumbled, dropping to the bed.
I took a seat beside his recline body and moved a piece of hair out of his face. He caught my hand in his and kissed the bruised knuckles lightly.
"How does you hand feel?" he asked, surveying the damage I'd done to myself earlier playing the Wii. I got a little excited and banged it against the wall on accident.
I shrugged, "It's not bad. Your kisses made it all better."
He pulled me down next to him and went to kiss my forehead but missed and the kiss landed somewhere between my eyes.
"Oops," he laughed and closed his eyes, "Sorry, my aim is off once I've had a few shots."
I reveled in his touch and slightly shuddered. Every little touch from him sent me into over drive. The press of his body against mine was heaven and hell all at the same time. I loved to be enveloped by him but I hated that he could touch me so platonically when it set a fire under my skin.
Honestly, it was hard to breathe when he was that close.
