Lee3: Hey guys, okay I know that last chapter was a bit slow…
Hanku: Yeah, no kidding.
Lee3: Please, don't interrupt. This next chapter rips through introductions.
Angry Reader: YOUR ENDING PROBABLY SUCKS (throws a screwdriver at Lee3 only to miss and the power tool is now stuck in a wall)!
Lee3: If he throws something sharper than that I'll shoot him.
Hanku: Let's just do the disclaimer before you shoot somebody.
Lee3: I don't own the Love Hina characters or the series if I did there would be no need for Naru-bashings.
Hanku: Because you would have bashed her in every chapter/episode.
Lee3: I don't own Hanku either, but I'm using him out of permission and request. I do own my SI and other characters that will show up in this fic.
Hanku: (laughs) Except the Ne…(catches himself) almost let it slip.
Lee3: (holding a bat) Good thing you caught yourself. For a second there I thought I would have had to knock you out.
Hanku: Time to start Chapter 2, RUN IT!
Lee3: Hey, that's my catchphrase get your own DAMMIT!
I Brought a Friend
While Lee and Hanku were finishing their mission (if you don't know what that is you're either retarded or you weren't paying attention last chapter), the Hinata Dorks were still trying to accomplish a hopeless mission.
Keitaro: (speaking with the narrator) We tried everything to get X to confess his true identity. We tried: torture, bribing, seduction and kindness.
Lee3: (as the voiceover narrator) How did you guys do?
Keitaro: Torturing someone doesn't work if the one being tortured through binding can use the same chains and electrocute you through them. Kitsune tried to bribe him WITH SEX! Instead he jammed his tail into her you know what, lifted her and through her out the window. I guess it doesn't pay to be constantly drunk and horny. Naru tried kindness, but X immediately materialized an anvil over her head and it fell on her.
Lee3: You guys suck.
Keitaro: Maybe, but I'm beginning to think that this X guy is not Lee.
Lee3: No shit Sherlock, the fans figured that out from the start.
X: Do you idiots enjoy annoying me as much as you annoy my master?
Kitsune: (barely conscious) Sort of.
Motoko: (struggling to stand) D…damn…d…demon (winces in pain).
X: Will you stop calling me a demon already? Just because I'm different doesn't mean I'm evil and I'm glad to see that you finally got your sword back.
Motoko: Fuck…you.
X: Have the hormones, lack the emotion and drive to.
Naru: (charred and smoking) Admit it…you're Lee.
X: My name is X…bitch.
Naru: You're Lee I know it.
Shinobu: (dizzy) Guys, maybe this guy really is…(passes out)
Naru: (pissed) Now look at what you've done.
X: What I've done, who threw her into my forcefield?
Su: (appears next to him all bubbly and happy) I did, I did (giggles right before she got punched out by X)!
X: (looks down at the bloody unconscious Su) That was totally not cool.
Motoko: Boulder Cutting (got shot by X's laser eyes)…damn (falls).
X: Please stop attacking me (kicks Naru in the stomach after she took a "hostile step" towards him).
Naru: (groaning in pain while hold her stomach) Just admit that you're Lee and (Starts hearing the base of a car stereo bumping a few miles away, but it started getting louder as if it was heading for the dormitory. The others immediately recovered anime style.) What's that?
X: It's coming from outside, maybe you all should check it out.
Keitaro: He's right, let's go (everyone rushed outside, except X who got up and slowly walked)!
Motoko: (hears the music) Is that…Rap music?
Sarah: You don't know what Rap music is?
Motoko: I don't listen to that Western Trash.
Sarah: (smirks) I'll tell Lee you said that.
Su: What song is it?
Sarah: Well…it sounds like the Beastie Boys.
Shinobu: What song is it?
Sarah: (listens carefully knowing that the wrong answer will get her tortured by the author) "Intergalactic".
The young girl was correct the music was the song "Intergalactic" from the Beastie Boys. The music got louder as the vehicle came speeding into view.
Kitsune: Is that Seta?
Shinobu: No, Seta drives a white van that truck is a pickup and it's in red and black…don't we know someone who is infatuated with those colors?
Sarah: I'm surprised you used infatuated in a sentence.
(The truck made a hard right, but the vehicle swerved and started to roll towards the residents as if it was done deliberately.)
Naru & Keitaro: (stares like a deer in the headlights) Oh my god…
Sarah, Su, Kitsune, Motoko, & Shinobu: IT'S ROLLING TOWARDS US AAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!
(Everyone stood there in fear screaming as the truck rolled towards them, the only one who wasn't screaming was X who was probably thinking, "These guys are fuckin' idiots".)
X: These guys are fuckin' idiots. Don't they know that Lee deliberately rolled that truck? Oh wait, they still think I'm Lee…this prank is working better than I thought.
(The truck rolled in total 31 times before stopping 20ft. in front of the bottom step, which happened to be where everyone, minus X was standing. X started walking towards the group.)
Keitaro: (raises his right hand) Who thinks that was deliberate?
All the girls: We do (raised their hands for three seconds before putting them down)!
(The driver side door opens and everyone, but X was shocked to see who emerged.)
Lee: (ecstatic) Don't tell me you didn't like that shit Kanako. You were saying the lyrics and headbanging (closes the door)!
Kanako: (blushing in embarrassment) I did not (exits the truck the same time as Hanku).
Hanku: (excited) YOU DID, YOU FREAKIN' DID!
Kanako: Okay I did.
Lee: Didn't you have a cat (Kanako opens her bag and Kuro flew out)? There he is.
Kuro: (trying to be cute) Hi everyone.
(A.N.: Whew, almost forgot that little bastard. This is what happens when you don't read the mangafor six months.)
Hanku: Hey guys, shouldn't we be getting a bunch of: hellos, oh my gods, what the hells, what the fucks or things of that nature from the residents right about now?
Kanako: (stoic) They're probably thinking of the shit Lee will put Naru through.
Lee: You know about all that?
Kanako: I arrived months after you left and what I've been told you gave Naru a hell of a time.
Lee: Only when she attacked Keitaro for no real reason.
Hanku: Going by what you've told me, that was almost everyday.
Motoko: (breaks up the conversation) Hold up! If you're Lee, then who is that (points to X)?
Lee: X, reveal yourself.
X: Yes my master (he removed his hood and what he revealed shocked everyone including Hanku).
Hanku: H-he's not human.
Kanako: He's a…a…
Everyone minus Lee & X: DRAGON!
X: Actually, I'm a…
Everyone minus Lee & X: WYVERN!
(A.N.: Hahahahahahaha, that's still funny even after writing it again.)
Lee: (annoyed) Wyverns don't have arms and X does retards.
X: I'm a Dragoid, a dragon with a human mind.
Lee: When he was alive he severed his emotions.
Keitaro: Why would someone do that?
X: I was born alone with no family and my fellow dragons shunned me because I wasn't like them for obvious reasons.
Su: (smiling while everyone gives blank stares)Don't follow(Hanku face faults and Lee gets pissed).
Lee: HOW STUPID ARE YOU PEOPLE! X couldn't bare his emotional and psychological suffering so he severed his emotions forever.
Naru: All that because he was persecuted and shunned…how sad.
Lee: None of these Hinata Shitheads will ever truly understand how that feels.
Sarah: At the risk of offending you and X I have to ask…was his presence here a prank or something?
Lee: Yes, it was and I'm not taking offense are you X?
X: No. By the way Lee also walks around in a cloak and hood at times.
(Keitaro and the others stood there dumbfounded that they fell for a half-assed prank and by how nonchalant X was revealing it.)
Lee: In other words, you fell for my Charlatan prank.
(A.N.: I know most of you readers are either in high school or college, if you don't know what charlatan means…LOOK IT UP!)
Kitsune: (arrogant for a drunk) How do you know we fell for it?
X: We are both linked telepathically, the faces you all made earlier gave it away, and I am incapable of lying.
Naru: Bullshit!
X: Really? People lie because they fear they will get in trouble and I have no fear. Thus, I am incapable of lying.
(A.N.: Philosophy/Sociology rules.)
Kanako: (smiles) They obviously got you all real good.
(Naru was silent for five seconds and then…she snapped.)
Naru: (Uber-pissed) GODDAMMIT, I HATE YOU AMERICAN BASTARDS! YOU'RE SUCH A MOTHERFUCKING ASSHOLE! BURN IN HELL MOTHERFUCKER!
Hanku: Damn, Naru went black.
Lee: (sees Naru running around like an idiot) Now she's running around like a chicken with its head cut off.
Hanku: Were those the reactions you were going for?
Lee: Yep, and the L-cams have secretly got it all on tape.
Hanku: (snickers) Dude, you're an ass.
Lee: (smiles) But I think it is funny and so does some of the audience.
Kanako: I knew that bitch was crazy and this confirms it.
Hanku: Look who's talking, Incest.
X: (appears behind Lee) Time for me to go back (returns to Lee's body).
Lee: (winces in pain) Every time he possesses me it hurts.
Keitaro: Lee, who is your friend?
Hanku: I am Hanku Royiaki.
Lee: Not only is he from my home dimension he is also from my home country.
Hanku: Too bad we're not from the same state.
Lee:If wewerewe wouldn't have all those California vs. Texas fights we love starting.
Sarah: He's from Texas?
Hanku: I'm from Dallas to be exact.
Keitaro: Things are going to get even crazier now when I think about what went on today. (Sees Naru still shouting obscenities and running around like a lunatic while everyone else is trying to calm her down.) Welcome back to Hinata House Lee & Kanako and I welcome you too Hanku Royiaki (smiles).
Hanku: Thanks man (shakes Keitaro's hand).
Lee: You're gonna love it here dude.
Kanako: (hearts for eyes) I am so glad to back here with my big brother.
Hanku: You know this is a shitty way to end a chapter.
Lee: Oh shut up Royiaki, the author is trying his best. Besides, he's getting warmed up for that one chapter (nudges Hanku with his elbow).
Hanku: What are you…oh that one!
To Be Continued…
Antics: How?
Lee3: Once again, it's Q & A time.
Su: Yyyyyaaaaaaayyyyyyy, it's that time where we piss you off.
Naru: (pouting) And I get hurt.
Hanku: It's not good to pout.
Naru: Oh shut up.
Keitaro: Lee3, how did you get Hanku to let you use his character anyway?
Lee3: Remember that chapter I wrote in the prequel uh, I think it was "Stuck on a Coaster"?
Sarah: (shudders) Not our finest moment.
Lee3: Hanku gave me a review saying, it would have been awesome if Hanku was in the arcade at the time of the nationwide panic. So I thought, "That's a good idea I think I will put his character in the sequel". Keep in mind that I thought up that chapter one year before I wrote it.
Motoko: You did get his permission didn't you?
Lee3: Two words…Final Chapter.
Hanku: He practically asked at the end of the finaleand I gave him permission through my review.
Naru: (crying) I'm gonna get double-teamed now!
Lee3: Maybe.
Hanku: Oh my god she's crying?
Lee3: That's what my reaction wasat first.
Su: Is reaction a food?
Lee3: No.
Shinobu: What surprises are in store in this time?
Lee3: A Puni Puni Poemy crossover.
Hanku: Dude, you gave it away!
Lee3: Who else besides us has actually watched that two episode long anime? Besides, I had todraw attention away from that one crossover you almost let slip!
Shinobu: Is there anything else?
Lee3: Yeah, a dimensional shift and I'm ending this Q & A on that note (pulls a random lever and everyone else except Hanku falls through a trap door).
Hanku: I've got a question?
Lee3: What?
Hanku: Are you gonna finish that Soul Caliber 2 fic?
Lee3: Yep, after this continuation is finished, which could be a while.
Hanku: Thought so.
Lee3: Chapter 2 is done. Chapter 3 is "Go Team America!", but it might be awhile before I post it since I have college papers due 5 days apart and I start working as a part-time Center Assistant at a university soon. I'll try to update as quick as possible.
Review or flame if you like just don't send death threats. See ya next time.
