They're barely off of her street before the first hiccup occurs.
Puck casually mentions that he hasn't packed any underwear for the trip, and he's the only one that argues it when Santana reroutes them all to the mall.
/
Puck and Santana face one another as they throw angry words back and forth at each other in the middle of the near empty mall parking lot.
Puck mostly shouts about how she ruins all of his fun, that she's changed because she used to love it when he didn't wear underwear. Santana ignores everything he says and switches between muttering low words in Spanish (that are definitely not on the high school syllabus), and screaming that she's leaving without him if he doesn't get the hell inside and buy at least thirty pairs of boxer shorts.
The rest of the group remains inside the cars, watching the showdown with bored intrigue. They say nothing, just listen and wonder how these two were ever in anyway together.
That's until Sam slowly breaks through the shouting with a cough and mentions that he actually needs to pick up a few things too.
Five minutes later, Santana's yelling that they have half an hour before she's high-tailing it out of there without them.
/
She ends up sitting in Starbucks with Quinn, drinking another gallon of coffee. Quinn sips on a cup of tea like she's nineteenth century British and neither of them say anything as she silently works out the new ETAs on their itinerary.
"We're already an hour behind and we haven't even left Lima," Quinn tells her like she wasn't completely aware of the fact.
Santana digs into her pockets for some cash. Four cups in thirty minutes has got to be a new record, or at least a personal best. "We should have just flown down there the night that Puckerman found out. It would have saved so much hassle."
Quinn steadies the table as Santana almost knocks their drinks over in a disgruntled war with her own clothing.
"But that would mean that Brittany wouldn't be here." Quinn says it like it's nothing, but it causes Santana to stop and stare at her friend, studying her carefully.
"Why didn't you tell me?"
Quinn shrugs and drains the last of her cup. "You want another?" she asks and then she's out of her seat before Santana can punch her in the face for being so damn annoying.
She doesn't even get to question her when she returns to the table because the others come in and ask them if they want to go get breakfast.
/
Santana shouts for another five minutes about being behind schedule and almost punches Rachel when she tries to back her up.
She abruptly stops when she's cramped in a booth beside Brittany and their bare thighs touch. It's electric and she darts away at the sensation. That's until Brittany shuffles closer to her and she has no choice but to feel it again and again.
They'll get there when they get there.
/
Breakfast, shopping, another coffee run, and a fifteen minute struggle to fit everything they've purchased into the cars, makes them three hours behind schedule. Santana's so past mad that she doesn't say anything, just sits with her hands firmly planted on the steering wheel.
They arrive on the highway a little while after and Santana finally feels like they're getting somewhere. She sighs in relief and turns her head to look at Brittany but finds her fast asleep, curled into a ball against the door.
Santana smiles despite the disappointment she feels. Car journeys with Brittany are one of her favorite things, but not when she's sleeping.
Quinn catches her eye in the rear view and gives her a knowing look. Santana doesn't know why, but she suddenly feels guilty.
The worst part is, is that she has no idea what for and it nags at some nameless part deep inside of her.
/
After a crackle over the radio, they stop at a mostly empty roadside diner just outside Louisville, Kentucky for some lunch. The little old lady running it looks terrified at the sudden amount of teenagers entering the restaurant and seats them all as far away from the counter as possible.
Santana remains behind after everyone has gone and gently coaxes Brittany awake. She stirs and opens one eye to view Santana.
"Hey," Santana says softly and she can't stop herself from brushing Brittany's hair from her face. "You hungry? We've stopped for some lunch."
Brittany's eyes flutter closed again and she shakes her head softly. Santana smiles and quietly exits the car, leaving her best friend behind to slumber.
/
"She only just made it," Puck tells her quietly once their food has arrived, but not before his entire face is covered in barbecue sauce. "Her parents nearly didn't let her come. She kept asking them for days and then yesterday morning they said she could take her mom's car. She didn't sleep so she could get back in time."
Santana watches her carefully out of the window, knowing that she'd do exactly the same thing.
/
They've been back on the road just over an hour when Brittany wakes up and stretches out her long limbs with a groan. Santana watches her with a sideways glance as she blinks then smiles once she realizes where she is, like she's waking up from a dream that actually came true.
"How long was I asleep?" she mumbles, turning to face Santana and curling back into a sleepy ball. She darts her heavy blue eyes to the back of the car and finds the others are asleep.
With full bellies, the rest of their companions had easily drifted off as soon as they got back in the car. Plus, the sun was beating down on them hard and the air was warm and stuffy. The only logical thing to do was to sleep in order to stave off enduring the tingles of the burning sun rays on their skin.
Santana checks the clock on the dash. "About seven hours," she says. "Tired?"
Brittany giggles low, sleep still thick in her throat. Santana almost shivers at the sound of it. "Not anymore," Brittany shakes her head.
Santana smiles rolls her eyes in response and changes lanes, watching Blaine and Mike follow her in her rear view. She turns back to the road, just in time to watch Brittany sit up and rub her stomach.
"Did you bring any snacks?" she says as her tummy grumbles in agreement.
Santana just hands her the take out box that's been waiting for her on the dash. Brittany gasps in excitement as she takes it. Santana waits nervously for Brittany to open the box, chuckling when she becomes so excited her fingers fumble at the opening.
The kiss to her cheek she gets when Brittany realizes that she picked her up her favorite sandwich is worth the swerve she almost takes into the center barrier.
/
An hour away from Nashville, Santana yawns in exhaustion.
Brittany nudges her, before giving her a bright smile, and coaxes her into a game of I Spy that has her laughing so hard she wakes the other three up.
They're not amused but Santana doesn't give a crap when Brittany's laughing so hard she can't breathe.
/
It's almost 9pm by the time they arrive and they spend a good half hour driving around searching for a motel. Santana's almost mad about it until she sees the disappointment in Rachel's face that she won't get to explore the musically vibrant area and suddenly she's overcome with joy that almost every motel they visit is without room. She really wants revenge for her 6am wake up call.
They wander the streets of Nashville just as the last streaks of sun disappear from the sky, searching for somewhere to eat. Brittany pushes Artie's wheelchair, but doesn't let Santana leave her side. Santana links arms with Quinn, finding it easy to relax, and tries to coax a smile from her by kicking loose stones at the backs of Rachel's legs. The one she gets doesn't have much heart put into it.
/
The boys demand as much meat as possible and they find a steakhouse that satisfies them beyond measure, but leaves Rachel muttering about limited vegetarian options.
Santana orders her first burger of the Taco and Burger Tour of America and laughs easily as the music sets the mood and her friends smile and joke around her.
The food arrives and Rachel ends up only being able to eat a salad and some fries. Santana attacks her burger like the cow is still alive and might run away. But Brittany's fond eyes gaze over her, reaching up to wipe away the ketchup that smudges her chin with the pad of her thumb, and Santana smiles despite how ridiculous she might look.
She starts to think that maybe something good could come of this trip after all.
/
They head back to the hotel. Kurt, Blaine, Rachel and Finn head back to their room with Mercedes and Sam following after them, and leave the rest of them behind in the hallway. Tina and Mike don't leave for their room a minute too soon and they're making out against the door as Mike struggles for the key.
(Santana makes a mental note to buy new bed sheets for her Grandma's bedrooms when they get to Florida, just so she can throw them away when they leave. It's the only thing she can think to do that doesn't make her want to vomit.)
Puck rolls his eyes once their door is closed, and leads the girls and Artie into their room, instantly heading for his bag. He pulls out a bottle of Jack Daniels and waggles his eyebrows.
Santana shakes her head when he offers her the bottle first and heads for the bathroom, set on finally getting some sleep. There's no way she's driving hungover, and she's glad when Brittany agrees and follows after her. They're brushing their teeth when Santana hears the balcony door slide open and the other three heading outside.
She crawls into the bed after taking off her shorts and sneakily taking off her bra. Brittany follows leaving them in nothing but their tank tops and underwear and, for the first time, it doesn't feel like the most comfortable thing in the world. They lay side by side awkwardly, watching the shadows of their friends talking quietly out on the balcony.
"How are you tired?" Santana whispers with a breathy chuckle. "You spent the whole day sleeping."
Brittany turns on her side and shifts closer. "I'm not," she says softly. "I just missed you."
Santana takes a deep breath and resists the urge to turn over and bury her face into Brittany's neck, soak in the smell of her skin from two days of driving. Instead, she reaches for Brittany's hand and tugs it to rest on her stomach.
She did the same thing when they were in New York and cramped up on the couch in the corner of the room. Brittany had been so close that she could feel every inch of her. Santana's pretty sure she didn't fall asleep those few nights they shared that small width of space, but blacked out from the effort of trying so hard not to touch her.
"I'm really glad you decided to have this trip," Brittany whispers when Santana doesn't say anything. "I like it that you let everyone come along. I'm glad that I got to come too."
Santana sighs then because responding to that is easy. "Me too."
Brittany shifts to share Santana's pillow and soon her arm is wrapped around Santana's waist. Santana tilts her head to look at her, their noses touching softly. It doesn't surprise her as much as it should when she notices that her arm has wormed its way around Brittany's back or that her hands are clinging to the fabric of her shirt.
They move closer at the same time. It's such a familiar action, to kiss goodnight. They used to do it all the time, but Santana can't remember the last time they actually did and pauses reluctantly. Things are different now, in a way that she both loves and hates at the same time.
It takes a minute or two, but Brittany nudges their noses together again, coaxing her forward to make the first move and letting her know it's okay. She does it gladly, eyes fluttering closed as her mouth moves closer...
"Quinn needs ice," Puck sing-songs as the balcony door slides open with a crash. They break apart, but he barely notices them anyway as he makes his way quickly through the room and out the door.
Santana waits a few moments before turning in Brittany's arms. Brittany understands the motion instantly and wraps her arms around Santana's body until they're spooned tightly together. Her face buries itself in Santana's hair and Santana lulls into a deep sleep at the feel of Brittany's breath steady against her neck.
With their hands locked over her stomach beneath the covers, she finds her first bit of peace.
/
Santana wakes at 5am with Quinn laying beside her. She stinks of Jack Daniels and cigarettes. That uncorroborated sense of guilt Santana felt yesterday tugs at her chest but it feels different and not really like guilt at all.
She reaches over and tangles her fingers with Quinn's, just in case.
/
Rachel wakes them at 7am, much to their disapproval. Santana throws the pillow beneath hers and Brittany's heads at the door, and Quinn just covers her face with the one she'd been resting on, groaning in pain.
Brittany switches to using Santana's shoulder as a pillow and Artie stares around the room, trying to focus his eyes without his glasses.
Puck doesn't even stir.
/
They leave for Memphis on the scheduled time that the itinerary says they should. Everyone's dressed, fed and watered; Santana has a fresh cup of coffee in the cup holder beside her, and she feels better about today than she did yesterday.
Brittany sits behind Santana instead of beside her, choosing to waste away the three and a half hour journey by watching episodes Friends on the DVD players set in the back of Santana's headrests. Quinn sits beside Santana, Artie next to Brittany with Puck laid out in the back clutching his stomach. The three of them are hung over and manage to sleep the entire journey, even with Brittany giggling every few minutes at something Joey says.
/
They arrive in Memphis around noon and head straight for Graceland. Rachel jumps out of the car and looks strangely excited even though she's never expressed a fondness for the King before.
She sings "Burning Love" all the way up to the entrance, garnering stares from everyone around them until Kurt stops her and kindly asks why, of all the songs in Elvis's catalog, she chose that one.
It makes them feel all the more awkward when she informs them it's what her dads used to sing to each other on Sunday mornings after date night.
/
Santana doesn't know why she agreed to this part of the trip. Rachel walks around telling them about Graceland and seems to know more of its history than most of the tour guides. Finn gets confused by half the things that she's saying and grows a strange obsession with Elvis's kitchen. Sam spends the entire time doing impressions, and Kurt just continually comments on the tackiness of the décor, no matter how many obese old ladies wearing Elvis shirts can hear.
The Jungle room is kinda cool though, and Brittany is genuinely confused to how there's grass inside. They walk through the rest of the house, admiring all the artifacts and eyeing all of Elvis' gold records. Puck follows behind them with Artie, both of them deciding what they'll do with their own Gracelands once they're huge, world-famous rock stars. Artie's greatest desire is a spiral ramp instead of a staircase, Puck's is a room for his harem of half-naked chicks in a hot tub.
Santana listens to them for a while, but when they start talking about video games, she goes back to listening to the tour. It gets kind of boring after a while. There's only so much Elvis she can take. She's pretty sure if she doesn't leave now she'll never be able to get "Suspicious Minds" out of her head.
/
Next stop on the Memphis tour is to see Sam Phillips' Sun Studio. Puck almost pees his pants at the sight of the birth place of rock and roll, and he and Rachel squeal for an hour about what it must have been like back in the day.
Santana chooses to wander up and down the street with Quinn. She's been quiet all day and Santana's starting to think it's not just the hangover that's dragging her down. She has that feeling again, tugging at her chest, and it starts to frustrate her that she can't seem to identify it. She just knows that something's not right.
"You okay?" she asks softly. The words feel foreign on her tongue.
Quinn nods and doesn't say anything. They walk up and down the street in silence.
/
The thirteen of them end up walking around Memphis for hours, relishing in a new place and new air, another corner of the world where no one knows who they are.
Santana stands between Quinn and Brittany at the back of the group. The back of her hand keeps brushing against Brittany's and she wants nothing more in the world than to feel comfortable enough to just tangle their fingers together and not let go.
Instead, she links their pinkies together and squeezes. For a while, it's enough.
/
They end up in an old bar that only plays the songs of the artists that made the area famous. It's like jumping back in time.
Brittany and Mike charm the manager with their too-fast dancing and he gives them all a free dinner for brightening up his day. When the food arrives, Brittany and Mike flop onto their empty chairs exhausted. The entire restaurant applauds them and Tina leans over to press a proud kiss to Mike's lips.
Jealousy begins to bubble inside of Santana and she purses her lips to tamp it down. She watches as they giggle together and whisper things in each others ears. She tears her eyes away, not willing to torture herself anymore, only to be greeted with Rachel, giggling with Finn, and Kurt and Blaine leaning in close as they whisper like there's no one else in the room. Even Mercedes and Sam seem more interested in each other than the rest of their friends and Quinn's talking intently with Puck and Artie.
Brittany's hand falls to her knee beneath the table and squeezes. She leans in close to whisper into Santana's ear while no one's looking, leaving her face there a few seconds to wallow in the feel of being so close to one another.
Santana sighs at the touch of Brittany's nose running over the tender spot below her ear, of her breath so soft against her skin. For a moment, she feels like she fits in, like she's just like everyone else.
"One day," Brittany tells her softly. Santana closes her eyes as hope and fear battle against each other in her chest.
One day, she repeats and maybe for a moment she can actually believe it.
/
They're waiting for desert and coffee when Elvis's "Can't Help Falling In Love" starts playing.
Santana watches and almost laughs at how easily it is for all her friends to migrate to the dance floor, like it's the only thing left to do in the universe.
Tina and Mike are first, smiling all the way there and wrapping their bodies around each other as soon as they arrive. Finn and Rachel are next, Finn nudging her softly until she blushes and lets him lead her to the floor. Blaine rolls his eyes at Kurt when Kurt holds out his hand and raises an eyebrow, but from the way that his eyes twinkle at his boyfriend's smile, Santana can tell that it's the only thing he wants. That bubble of curiosity grows in Santana's stomach again when Sam clears his throat and asks Mercedes if she wants to dance, but it stops abruptly when she sees the way that they smile at each other.
Santana looks at the rest of the table, eyes soft when she sees Artie kindly offer Quinn his hand. She smiles at him before nodding, and the pair head out onto the dance floor. Quinn sits on his lap and wraps her arms around his neck, pressing their cheeks together as he slowly wheels them around the dance floor.
She turns to catch Brittany watching them with a fond smile on her face. Her heart lurches in her chest, pounding wildly. Brittany turns to her with sad eyes and Santana knows that the sadness isn't because Artie is dancing with Quinn or because she's not dancing at all. It's because of her, because Brittany knows that it'll be a long time before they get to dance together like everyone else does.
Brittany's smile is resigned to that truth and she turns back to watch their friends in silence. They're the only people in the room not dancing, the only people not pressed against the warmth and comfort of another human body. Santana opens her mouth to utter the words, to ask, but her mouth just opens and closes unable to say them.
Brittany reaches over and hooks their pinkies together and Santana gives up.
/
They don't care that they're three hours behind schedule when they finally leave Memphis. They had too much fun and Earl, the owner of the bar, tells them they should come back to visit on their way back through when they go home.
They all wholeheartedly agree and Brittany even hugs Earl and promises to give him dancing lessons if his hip's better by the time they come back. Earl's wife Loretta packs three bags of snacks and sandwiches for them to take, forcing them to reassure her that they'll make sure they eat and get some sleep so she doesn't worry.
Not even when they all finally find Puck making out with one of their daughters by the restroom does Earl or Loretta offer them any ill words.
Driving well into the night doesn't seem such a tough deal when they're making friends with good and friendly people.
Plus, Earl makes one mean pot of coffee which he fills three flasks with and demands Santana, Blaine and Mike take one each for the seven hour journey that gladly awaits them.
/
Santana watches in her rear view mirror as, one by one, her friends all fall asleep. It's been a long day and the thought that they have a few more like it left to go makes something inside of her ache.
Only Brittany remains awake beside her, watching and counting the road signs as they pass.
"I'm sorry," Santana whispers softly, keeping her eyes on the road.
Neither of them have mentioned it, but Brittany knows why she's apologizing.
She glances sideways to see if Brittany heard and catches her checking in the rear view to see if the others are asleep. Once she's satisfied that they are, she tangles their fingers together over the center arm rest and Santana's chest burns.
Brittany falls asleep like that, with their fingers tangled together and her head resting against the window.
/
Around Jackson, Mississippi, Blaine radios in that he needs gas.
They pass a gas station twenty minutes later and she's the first to pull in, rolling up to one of the pumps and jumping out of the car. Blaine pulls in second, Mike swiftly after him and they both jump out of their cars to quietly greet her. Santana notices that, just like her her, all of their passengers are fast asleep.
Santana shivers as she steps towards pump, following their lead. She hates getting gas. Hates the smell of it if she accidentally gets some on her hands, which she almost always does, and hates how it lingers for days. Plus, you never know how many truck drivers have scratched their asses and touched those things. She doesn't even like to think about where else their hands might have been.
"Here, I'll get it," Blaine says, jumping in quickly. Santana glances to his car, where he already has the nozzle resting in his inlet. She mumbles a thanks and rubs her eyes tiredly. Blaine offers her a kind smile. "You look exhausted."
She scoffs, but gives him a half-smile in return anyway. "Starting to regret this whole driving there thing."
Concern coats his features, "We should stop for a while. Get a little rest before we hit the road again. It's dangerous driving for this long without a break. We could get coffee in the diner. I don't think anyone would mind."
Santana nods, too tired to argue.
/
Mike decides to have a nap instead and asks them to wake him up before they leave. Santana knows if she goes to sleep she'll never wake up, so she follows after Blaine as they walk across the forecourt to the diner.
"Hang on," she mumbles as goosebumps form all over her arms. "I forgot my jacket."
She runs back and grabs it, slipping it on over yet another tank top. She readies herself to head over to Blaine, but stops when she hears gentle shivers from inside the car. She turns to find the source and sighs when she notices that all of them are quivering from the drop in the temperature.
She figures it's okay to show her kind side while they're sleeping. She rolls her eyes and rounds to the back of the car, waving a hand at Blaine to tell him she'll catch up. She pops the back of the car and delves around inside, not really caring if anything falls on Puck because she's pretty sure she could sing Don't Stop Believing at the top of her lungs into his ear canal and he wouldn't even stir.
She finds the few blankets her mother made her bring with them in case there wasn't enough, and adds it to the one that she keeps in there anyway. She finds a pillow and grabs that too and rests everything atop the car as she takes one blanket and lays it lazily over Puck. She gathers everything and climbs into the front seat, leaning over the chairs to get to Quinn and Artie. Quinn sighs softly when Santana draws the blanket up to her chin to cover her shoulders. Artie yawns when she tucks the blanket around him so that it doesn't fall off of his legs.
But when she gets to Brittany, she can't help but stop and stare. The way the too-bright gas station lighting hits her face shouldn't make her look so beautiful, but it does. It fights with the pitch black of the darkness until Santana can see how every curve and contour of her face looks more perfect than should be allowed.
She gulps as she uses the blanket she always keeps in the car to cover over Brittany's bare legs and arms. Her mind flickers to all the times that she and Brittany put down the seats in the back of her car and lay on their backs to look up at the stars through the sunroof. Some nights they would end up making out, but most of them they would just stare up at the sky and dream of places far, far away.
It would be simple to say that things were easier back then, but it wouldn't be true. It was hard. It was hard to lay beside Brittany and pretend that she didn't want to just roll over and hold her close without their clothes coming off or their lips battling. It was hard not to chuckle 'I love you' every time Brittany pointed up to the sky and made up a constellation. Everything was so hard then, but it's even harder now.
She sighs and draws the blanket up around Brittany's shoulders. Her fingers push the hair back from Brittany's face as she slowly shifts her to slip the pillow between her head and the door. Brittany stirs, but Santana's there, making gentle sounds to lull her back into sleep. She settles easily with Santana's nose pressed to her hair.
Santana takes a deep breath and can't help herself.
"I love you," she whispers almost silently. Brittany's skin warms as Santana presses a kiss to her forehead. She hums contently in response.
/
The waitress follows her as she makes her way over to Blaine, instantly pouring her a cup of coffee as she sits down. He says nothing, but stares at her like he's the only nerd in class who knows the answer to a really hard math problem. She quickly becomes uncomfortable under his scrutinizing gaze.
"What?" she says, pushing her hair away from her face and shrinking into herself.
Blaine smiles and sips his coffee, picks at the blueberry muffin in front of him. "Does she know?" he asks and Santana's heart drops.
Her automatic response to scoff leaves her before she can control it. Denial seeps into her bones and she rolls her eyes at him in refusal. "I don't know what you're talking about."
She's a little shocked when he doesn't push it, but he doesn't stop staring at her and maybe, Santana thinks, her math problem is not really a hard math problem at all.
/
They arrive in New Orleans at almost five am. They don't even bother looking for their motel this early in the morning. They assume it would be useless considering that its front desk probably wouldn't be open yet. They just find somewhere quiet outside the city and fall quickly asleep.
Before she drifts off to sleep, Santana feels Brittany tangle their fingers over the arm rest again, underneath the edge of her blanket.
