Defying Gravity Chapter 2

Jesse had entered the auditorium via the back entrance and under the highest secrecy. Although he'd turned down the invitation to judge Regionals, he had agreed to make a pro bono guest appearance. There was just one condition: no one would know in advance that he was the guest performer. Secrecy was possible. Like Depp, Jesse knew how to buy privacy when he needed to. Also in his favor was the fact that over the past two years he'd kept a low profile, living and working primarily in New York. He didn't believe in inviting the paparazzi to follow his every move like some stars did.

Over the past few weeks Kurt and Jesse had been busy plotting their strategy and tonight was the implementation of phase one. His band for the engagement was selected from personal friends and they'd rehearsed in his loft in the weeks prior to the competition. Everything was in place, but for the first time in a very long time Jesse felt nervous. This was going to need to be the performance of a lifetime and so much hinged on the plan running smoothly, and on their gauging Rachel's reactions correctly. His cell phone vibrated and he checked the text. So far all was going well.

Jesse distracted himself by watching the choirs' performances and critiquing them as if he was part of the judging panel. By the end of the competition he could say without bias that New Directions from Lima deserved to win. Their talent was still developing but it was undeniable. They exuded joy mixed with the precision of a well rehearsed group. It was as if someone had combined the best aspects of New Directions and Vocal Adrenaline from the year he had won his fourth show choir championship.

As the judges left their seats to deliberate, Jesse made his way to the wings, taking a quick glance to where Kurt was seated and then to the woman next to him. She was so beautiful she took his breath away, but now wasn't the time to dwell on that. Jesse refocused and prepared to take the stage. Let the show begin.

)))))))

Rachel was in awe of her choir's performance. She was so proud of them and what they'd accomplished in less than a year. Kurt had squeezed her hand and grinned like a lunatic at her when they had finished and the crowd had risen in a standing ovation. Though basking in the glow of pride, a small voice inside her head was growing louder. It kept asking her: why wasn't she on a stage singing and doing what she loved to do the most?

For a moment her joy dimmed as she contemplated that not only did Finn not like her coaching Glee club, he also refused to come watch her choir practice or compete. In fact he begrudged any time she spent with them. Thus it had been no surprise that he'd conveniently had to go out of state this weekend on business. Over the past few months Rachel found herself growing increasingly unhappy with the state of her marriage. Why was it okay for him to pursue his career and not okay for her? Why was she expected to be supportive of him but he was either derogatory or cavalier about her interests?

She looked at Kurt sitting beside her. He and Blaine were so supportive of each other. They were pursuing their dreams in New York. She should have been there too. Where or where had it all gone so wrong?

Kurt patted her hand and she smiled weakly at him. He had been such a good friend to her, in fact he and Blaine were her only real friends. Her mind was diverted from its sad reflections as the judges left to deliberate and the crowd settled down for the introduction of the special guest performer.

All the blood seemed to simultaneously freeze in her veins and rush to her head when she heard the words Jesse St. James. What was he doing here? He was famous; he didn't need to come back to Ohio. Was he deliberately flaunting his success and enjoying her failure? Rachel's mouth tightened into a grim line and she crossed her arms across her chest.

Kurt glanced sideways at Rachel and noted her defensive posture. He'd hoped she wouldn't take Jesse's appearance this way, but both he and Jesse realized it was a distinct probability.

Rachel leaned over and hissed to him, "Why is he here?"

"I expect it is because he was asked. " Kurt replied soothingly, and patted her arm in reassurance.

Rachel uttered a humph, settled back in her seat, and glared at the man now walking towards the microphone. It didn't help her mood one bit to note that he was even more attractive now then he had been at twenty. The black t-shirt and tight jeans merely helped to emphasize just how fit and sexy he was, and his curly hair was a tiny bit on the long side, just the way she liked it. When he took the mike in hand and smiled, her stomach did a complete flip, which only served to anger her more. How dare he still have that effect on her!

"It is an honor and privilege to have been asked to perform here tonight." Jesse began. "It has reminded me of one of the best times of my life; when my hopes and dreams were all before me, almost within my grasp. I'll be honest; there were some hard times after that. The entertainment industry is a harsh business, and not everyone will succeed in making it as a career. But at the very least, participating in show choir will give you a foundation to work successfully towards future goals, whatever those goals turn out to be. And for those truly gifted ones, who have the passion, talent and the work ethic, it is so worth the struggle. To those ones in particular, I'd like to say: Don't ever let anyone tell you that your goals are unrealistic or crazy, or that they are unachievable. Don't let them convince you that you should settle for a mundane existence and the so called normal 9 to 5 life. To have the talent and not use it will stifle your soul. Reach for your dreams, reach for the stars, and you will have no regrets. "

And with that introduction, Jesse began to sing "To Dream the Impossible Dream" a capella.

Kurt was watching Rachel closely out of the corner of his eye, and noted immediately when the tears began streaming down her cheeks. He quietly handed her his monogrammed handkerchief and put his arm around her. She turned towards him and quietly snuffled into his shoulder. Kurt knew she wanted to escape, and the teenage Rachel would have exited with a dramatic flourish; but the adult Rachel had her position as Show Choir Director to uphold. Her students were sitting in the audience, she couldn't make a scene. Besides, Jesse was in very fine voice and Kurt was well aware how captivated Rachel had always been by Jesse's voice.

Slowly, Rachel soft sobs diminished. By the time Jesse had ended the song, she had regained her composure somewhat. As the audience applauded loudly she blew her nose as inconspicuously as possible and then settled more calmly into her seat to enjoy the show.

Jesse was then joined on stage by a small group of musicians and his next song was humorous, deliberately chosen to lighten the mood. For the next forty minutes he proceeded to cover a variety of song styles ranging from Broadway to rock and roll, all interspersed with amusing commentary. He had the audience totally enthralled and in what seemed no time at all, the time for his final song approached.

"It's been a great pleasure to be here, and to close I'd like to finish with a song that was performed at my last regional choir competition," Jesse paused, then grinned and added, "But not by my team. It was sung by our worthy opponents that year, New Directions. Their choir had one of the most gifted female vocalists it has ever been my pleasure to hear. I see that she's in the audience tonight, along with one of her talented teammates from that year, and I'd like to invite them up on stage for this song. Kurt? Rachel? Would you please do me the honor of joining me on stage?"

Rachel turned to Kurt in shock. What was Jesse doing? Kurt pretended to be just as surprised as she was, but stood up and waved as the crowd applauded politely. "You know I never give up an opportunity to perform in front of an audience and neither do you. Let's show them how it's done!" Kurt gently but firmly pulled Rachel out of her seat and propelled her towards the stage. Mikes were distributed to them as they ascended the steps at the side of the stage, and Jesse met them at the top. After shaking Kurt's hand and giving Rachel a quick hug, he signaled the band and the intro to "Don't Stop Believing" began to play as they made their way to center stage.

Just as both Kurt and Jesse had counted on, Rachel was seduced by the stage and the music. As Rachel's and Jesse's voices began weaving their magic, Kurt was content to join in on the chorus and leave the rest of the performance in their more than capable hands. When the last notes died away, Rachel came out of her near trance and realized the audience were all on their feet cheering. After they took their bows together, Jesse made Rachel take a bow by herself. They crowd whistled and cheered even louder, demanding more.

Jesse grinned and took the mike in hand once more. "Would you like to hear Rachel sing another song? I know she's wickedly good on this one." There was more applause and cheers, and her students were chanting "Rachel, Rachel." Rachel blushed then looked at Jesse in slight confusion. He mouthed "Defying Gravity" to her and after a brief hesitation, she smiled and nodded.

As the words poured forth, Rachel grew more and more empowered by them. She'd been like a plant deprived of proper light for too long and was finally receiving the sunshine necessary to grow, to bloom. Kurt and Jesse stood back and watched in admiration as the Rachel they knew emerged bit by bit. Again the audience applauded wildly, but Jesse, much to his regret had to wind things up as he'd received the signal that the judges were returning to their seats.

"I see the judges have reached their decision, so I won't be cruel and prolong the suspense. To the choirs participating, I wish you all good luck, not just tonight but in whatever paths you take. Thank-you again, it's been wonderful."

As they made their way off stage with the applause still ringing in their ears, Jesse turned to Rachel. "You were brilliant as ever, Rachel" and gave her another hug. He had missed this so much, the way she felt in his arms, the way she smelt like sunshine and raindrops, but he had no right to hold her. Regretfully he pulled away and turned to Kurt to shake his hand once more. "Please don't go anywhere you two, I have a couple of things I need to take care of, but I'd like to spend some time getting caught up."

They both nodded and Jesse went over to converse with one of committee organizers.

Still feeling the performance high, Kurt turned to Rachel, "I believe that in just a few minutes you'll be accepting a trophy with your choir. "

"Do you really think so? It's only my first year coaching them, but weren't they terrific." Rachel bubbled with enthusiasm. Kurt hadn't seen her this happy in years.

"If New Directions doesn't win it will be a travesty. And you! You were just amazing out there. " Kurt enveloped Rachel in a big hug and swung her off her feet. "Tell me again why you aren't a star on Broadway? Oh wait, the answer is two words, the first word starts with the letter F, and the second word with an H." As soon as the sarcastic words were uttered, Kurt mentally kicked himself. Damn it! He just hadn't been able to resist uttering that barbed comment. He closed his eyes and waited for Rachel to leap to Finn's defense as per usual. But no words were uttered. He opened his eyes in surprise and looked at her. Rachel was gazing out at the audience, a pensive expression on her face.

"Tell me the truth, Kurt. Has Finn been deliberately sabotaging my dreams?"

"Will you believe me if I tell you yes?" Kurt asked hesitantly.

Rachel chewed her lip for a moment then gazed up at him. "Maybe. Maybe I'm ready to listen properly this time at least."

But their conversation was suddenly interrupted, as the volcano known to them as one Santana Lopez erupted into their private conversation.

"Hummel, beat it, I need to speak with Berry for a moment. Alone." Santana glared at Kurt and he cast a quick look at Rachel. She nodded slowly so he withdrew, just far enough to be out of sound yet not sight, in case things got ugly. With Santana, one could usually count on the ugly.

"What can I do for you, Santana? And it's Hudson, not Berry, if you remember." Rachel's voice was stiff and controlled. Santana was always the bearer of bad news as far as she was concerned and there was no love lost between the two women.

"Life's been better for me recently and it's time I owned up to my mistakes. I've been in therapy and worked through a lot of issues. For some time now, I've been debating about letting you know the truth. I didn't expect to see you here though. I came to see my niece. She's in the Dayton choir." Santana paused and then asked: "have you never wondered how you managed to get pregnant your first year in college even though you were on birth control?'

Rachel stared at her in total bafflement for a moment before replying, "Because the pill isn't a hundred percent guaranteed birth control, and because my life sucks?"

"No. Well, maybe the part "your life sucks" is true, but the pregnancy was because I switched your pills and replaced them with fake ones during the Christmas party at your house. "

"You did what?" Rachel stood there in shock, not really believing what she was hearing. "But why?"

"I was still envious of you, of your plans, of your life. It was only a matter of time before you got out of Lima, and became star, while I was still stuck in loserville and miserable with everything and everyone. So when Finn asked for my help I…"

Rachel's hand was half way towards slapping Santana when her last words sank in. "Wait a minute!" Rachel's arm fell back to her side like a puppet whose strings had been cut. "My husband, suggested it?"

"Well, he was just your boyfriend then, but yeah. When he realized he had no hope of a football scholarship and getting out of this town, he was in a bad way. You were the only one who still believed in him. You hung the moon and stars on him and he knew you'd leave him behind and soon forget all about him if you went off to New York. He'd do anything to keep you with him. If it meant you had to sacrifice your dreams, then so be it. Honestly, I've never understood what you see in him. You should have kicked his sorry ass to the curb back when he stole Quinn from Sam and then played both you and Quinn. "

Rachel felt increasingly numb and sick as Santana spilled her story. "So what made you decide to tell me this now?"

"Tonight, after what St. James said, and after watching you perform, I just couldn't let it go on any longer. You deserve so much better than being Rachel Hudson of Lima, Ohio. I'm sorry for my part in ruining your life. I realize I can't expect your forgiveness, so I won't bother asking for it. But for what it's worth I hope you do reach for those stars." Santana turned to go, and then turned back again. "Just one more thing"

Rachel was still trying to grasp everything she'd just heard. "What else?" she asked, her voice now dull and broken.

"You might want to look into what Hudson gets up to when he's at one of his many business meetings out of town. Just sayin' " and with that Santana turned and left.

Kurt was by Rachel's side in a flash. He'd seen the increasing paleness of her complexion and tension in the way she held herself.

"Just what the hell did that b"

"Please, Kurt. Not now, okay?" Rachel pleaded. She leaned against him and closed her eyes. She would not cry!

Just then Jesse appeared with a sports drink in hand. He too had been observing Rachel from a distance. "Here, you'd better drink this, Rachel."

"No." she turned her head away.

"Please, Rachel, you are as white as a sheet. If you are going into shock you need to drink something sweet immediately. Just a few sips for now, it will help, I promise. They've just asked New Directions and two other teams to come on stage. You wouldn't want to pass out on stage and worry your students would you?"

Jesse's last words penetrated through the haze that had descended over her. "No, no of course not. I can't let my kids down." She grabbed the bottle and took a few sips, then a few more. The weakness in her limbs began to lessen somewhat after a couple of minutes and her mind regained some clarity. Kurt and Jesse exchanged a look, and though neither spoke, it was a foregone conclusion that Kurt would accompany Rachel on stage.

The next half hour was a blur to Rachel. She was vaguely aware of her choir winning, the screams, the hugs and the flashes from cameras going off as pictures were taken. But it all seemed like some kind of dream. The evening had been like a Greek comedy and tragedy rolled into one and she was emotionally spent.