Presented for people who would read load of my crap. I am being sarcastic bitch here. I dont expect live to be good but hey, it's too hard sometimes, you see.

ENJOY~


They were called down to the lobby by China's mother. And so, he met his step siblings for the first time in seven years. China kept his silent through out the awkward moment. The older of the Korean sibling couldn't make it, but the rest was there.

"It is unfortunate that the visiting hours were over, Yao." China's mother smiled as she grabbed China's hand softly. "But we can have a dinner together and then we can meet your father tomorrow."

China nodded, watching as the whole family gathered together. His stepmother smiled at him, saying all those polite greetings while his step father smiled, kinda hiding behind China's mother. China nodded to them. The family would look awkward even from stranger's point of view. Meanwhile, England kept his distance from China as far as he could to not make China's mother upset, and as near as he could to not make China upset. He set on a distance of 1 meter behind China, smiling and handshaking the member of the family China never told him about. China never told him that he had that many step siblings. He wondered when he handshake a teenage girl, whom battled eyelashes made England felt embarrassed. He knew that the girl was trying to get him.

"Hi. My name is Mei*" the girl smiled. England nodded and smiled back, politely.

"This is my brother Kaoru; and I think you have known my older brother Kiku."

England nodded again. He knew he shouldn't do this in front of China, but having at least one person from China's family warming up against him felt good. England was a sensitive guy; being born and raised in England most of his life had made him as sensitive as Asian about manner and hidden emotions between expressions. He knew the little girl was trying to seduce him; and he knew he didn't feel anything because although he wasn't gay since the first day he was born, he suspected he had tendencies to swing that way. It needs big boobs and beautiful face to actually pull him from China (whose beauty was not easy to match) and a mere teenage girl with fake diamond eyelashes and blushers wouldn't move him at all. But; and there was a but; he still wanted to be remembered as a good guy if something ever happen.

Something like, for example, China exploded and cut off the ties with his family entirely. England wasn't sure he wanted to take the bad guy position there. But if the circumstances made him to, he would. All for his lover. Yet, he still could hope for the best and he would be glad to impose a good impression on his future in-law family (or families).

So he toyed along when the little girl took his hand to their cars—and they were separated. China was taken into another Mercedes where his mother and her family sat on, and England was taken (like a hostage) to the BMW which owned by China's stepmother and her children.

Throughout the journey (pure, pure torture**) England acted as much as he could like a gentleman. He smiled and answered their questions properly, and digging information as he go. He just found out that actually China's family wasn't that bad. In fact, they were actually quite well off. It appeared that China's father was the head director for a popular development company in that nation, while China's mother was actually a nation-wide renowned dermatologist (and Taiwan added on the gossips about how her clients were all celebrities). Meanwhile, the stepmother was his father's favourite secretary and China's stepfather was his mother's favourite nurse (the information was whispered into his ear as the teenage girl was trying hard to catch his attention by whispering 'secret's).

England now knew why China was so smart yet so charismatic. He remembered how he was mesmerized the first time they met. It was the art lecture; language. It was an elective for England, that's why he looked down upon the subject. And when he saw an Asian beauty walking to the front of the hall to give a presentation, he expected nothing much from an international student. They always talked heavily accented and while some might sound good, Asian students never failed to sound good enough for his ear (Yes, England was an arrogant man). So when China's voice resonated through the hall, England was forced to hold his breath.

That was the perfect. The sound, the accent (almost non-existent, except for some occasional aru's'), the content, the charm. Everything was perfect.

Since then England followed China. Asking around to find out that China was famous as the campus (man) whore—the guy pretty enough to make even the straightest guy in campus slipped under the cover with him. But no-one stayed long. Every single week, no, even every two days, England saw China walking beside different men. No, Not actually. China wasn't walking beside the men; they were walking beside him, trying to get his attention.

It's not like China was gay too. He was famous as a bi—he kissed a very pretty girl in front of the library main hallway, a show for everybody's delight; and he had a string of pretty girls name on his relationship history chart. But England didn't want to be one of them—those used up for one night only partner—and aimed straight at the head.

He literally smacked China's head with a bunch of roses.

"What the fuck, aru!" was the first line China ever spoke to him.

"I am challenging you—go out with me."

"Are you crazy?" China, clearly annoyed and pissed, threw the bunch of flowers to the ground. "Smacking my face with roses will get you a date? Keep on dreaming, moron!"

"I am not moron. Arthur. Arthur Kirkland. I am in your art lecture. Wa..wait! Listen! Hey, Yao Wang, I think you are interesting. I want to challenge you."

"Challenge what, aru? Shut up. I am late for my work."

"I heard that you will do anything for money."

"I will, but not with you. You have lost your chance the second you hit me with those, aru!"

"Come to the uni café this evening. My treat. I will tell you the challenge."

"Say it now. I have work aru."

"People are looking." England smiled as he spread his arms around. True enough, people were staring at them, like a kind of show. It was interesting of course, the campus whore versus the campus gentleman. "And I want to be private."

"I don't have time."

"When are you free?"

"I am not free unless you can pay me more than 50 bucks an hour aru." China looked at his watch. "So scram."

Of course, unknown to China, England could afford to give him 500 dollars per hour. And thus, the date was set.

There goes their first date. And first night. And then second date. Second night. Third date. First fight. First make up sex. Fourth date. Twentieth rounds of mind blowing bed session. And so on. As the time passed, they got more comfortable with each other. Their 'friend with benefits' label was changed into 'dating'. They wticked to one another. Slowly, even China's label as a campus whore disappeared. And now, they were an inch away from 'moving together'.

England stopped reminiscing the past when he saw the Chinese-style building. Maybe he got the chance to really understand China that night because apparently, the Chinese restaurant was the starting point of everything.


It was a decent medium class Chinese restaurant, filled with the smell of good Chinese yum cha variety and families. England followed as Taiwan dragged his hand across the room, to a secluded room behind the Chinese styled-room divider.

China suddenly appeared beside him, taking his hand and pulling him away from Taiwan. "… You like Chinese food, right Arthur?"

England smiled. "Yes."

"But I didn't know you like Chinese girl, aru. Or my step sister, in that matter."

England couldn't believe his ear. He grinned from ear to ear. "Are you jealous?"

China blushed. "No way, aru. It's just… well, felt weird looking you like a paedophile trying to pry on a girl way younger than your own age. It's inappropriate, aru."

England couldn't help but grin and felt happy for the first time in the day. "Hey." He whispered softly on China's ear. "I want you tonight. The best Chinese cuisine."

China blushed even redder. "Shut up, aru."

"Please sit over here." Suddenly China's mother was beside them, showing two chairs by the side of a round table. "You can sit beside this gentleman and show him the food, right, Yao?"

China nodded. England stopped grinning as he saw the stern face China's mother was having on her face.

The dinner went fine. England noticed that the families were not so close with each other, and he felt pressured to find new topics every time the conversation ceased to continue. And he saw how China silently watched as the round moving plate swirled. He saw how everybody was busy trying to be calm and composed, when what they wanted was to run away from the table. It was so tense.

England saw how China refused to be the main topic of any conversation, shutting himself further and further. England helped him by answering most of the question (though with some difficulty—although everybody around the table could hold a decent English language conversation, most of them didn't get England's sense of joke), and the conversation grew into how they wanted to go to China's place once all his step siblings have their holidays. China smiled, saying that his place was small and insignificant, and they all laughed as China's 'modesty'. England noticed how China tried desperately to make them forgot the plan to 'visit' him.

The food came, and everybody was busy for a while. Silent overcome them for a while, everybody busy choosing their own food. England received a generous amount of food on his plate, shoved by Taiwan. He tried to stop the girl's generosity to no avail, and the food piled on his small plate like a mountain. Meanwhile, China watched as his plate was filled by his mother.

"Do you remember, Yao? You love the dumplings so much."

China smiled weakly. It wasn't him who loved the dumpling; it was her. But he kept his silent and watched as a piece of dumpling landed on his plate. His mother smiled.

"You should eat a lot! It's been so long since you've eaten here!"

China nodded. England watched as China ate the piece of dumpling. Without even thinking, England took a piece of chicken feet from his (mountain!) pile of food and put it on top of China's plate.

China seemed surprised from the gesture, but he smiled gently as England filled his plate with many other food—boiled prawn dumpling, cha siu bao, congee, lou ma gai, etc.—and scowled playfully.

"Stop it, aru! My plate is full!"

"Never too full. You need to try everything, Yao." England smirked. "I won't let your plate empty tonight."

China stopped smiling. He slowly moved his hand under the table, and squeezed England's thigh gently. "Thank you."

His lover smiled, while trying to control his chopstick—it seemed like England wasn't born to use chopstick at all. Unbeknown to them, China's mother watched the whole scene in silent.


"I am really full."

"You need to move a bit, aru! Otherwise you will get fat from eating those food! I couldn't believe you finished those piles of food!"

"She kept giving me those, I couldn't refuse her." England moaned, patting his bulging stomach. He was lying on top of the bed, while China made some hot water for some cups of tea. "She was flirting with me."

"… So, Mr. Popular now, are we?" China hissed.

England chuckled. "I am always popular, Yao. Don't you remember how many women tried to break us up this year?"

"…You are such a bad playboy. Just as bad as Francis, aru."

"He? Pardon me, but he is a frog. I am way better than that French. I thought you should be very clear about that."

China went to the bathroom. "You should see yourself in the mirror sometimes, aru! Oh, I will use the bathroom first, so please help me to make the tea when the water's done!"

The bathroom door was closed. England closed his eyes. It wasn't bad. China seemed to be pretty cheerful now, and his sarcasm has returned. China didn't look sad anymore. It was good.

"I never thought you are a rich, Yao. I thought since you seemed to need money so much, you come from a, well, lower class family."

"Don't judge the book by the cover, aru! Anyway, I did pay everything by myself, so I need all the money I can get, aru!"

"Oh yes… I forgot about your independent obsession. Ya~o! I want to use the toilet too! Are you done?"

"Not yet! Give me a moment!"

England patted his own stomach, trying to keep his urge in control. "We should get a room with two toilets, not beds. By the way, I never know your parents are a doctor and a director, Yao."

"Who told you that? That's the worst combination, aru!" China shouted from the bathroom. "They was so busy and never at home! They were married to their works!"

"Maybe that's why they were having affair with their secretary and nurse. Talk about easy access." England sighed. "I can imagine why people say proximity is what love is all about. It's good you are moving in with me now…"

"… Secretary? Nurses? What do you mean, aru?"

England stopped thinking. He just realized he had accidentally, innocently dropped another bomb. "… No. Nothing, Yao."

"Tell me, aru." China shouted from the bathroom. "So you are saying they have an affair even before the divorce?"

"…"

"Who told you?"

"Your sister."

"You mean, my step-sister, aru." China scowled and then silence overcame them. "You are so comfy with her, huh? Until she told you these…"

England bit his lips. "Yao…?"

No answer. China shut himself in the bathroom until England gave up and went to the hotel's lobby bathroom to relieve his urge. And even when he returned back from the lobby, China was still inside the bathroom. England knocked the door softly. It was locked from inside.

"Yao? … Are you OK?"

"…I am fine, aru." China answered. "It's just… It's… Well, I get stomach-ache. You can go to sleep first, aru."

"You really OK? Want to talk?"

"Nothing to talk about. You should rest, aru. I am fine."

In the end England spent his night alone on the single bed. It felt weird because he was used to sleep with China in his arms. But apparently, China didn't come out from the bathroom until morning.


China stopped in front of the hospital room door. His mother walked in front of China and England, showing the room. It was only them that day, since the other family members were busy with their own daily businesses.

"Your father wants to see you, Yao. We missed you so much." His mother's hand was on his, grabbing China's cold hand. China flinched.

Did you? China looked away, holding his breath. Did you, really?

He felt bad for always questioning his own mother's words, but he couldn't help it. It came from experience and memories. And his mother's touch made him felt disgusted. After the sudden fact from England the night before, China started to understand why things happen they way it happened. And he just realized his mistake.

He thought they were divorced because of the quarrels. But the truth was, they separated because each has an affair.

They don't even love each other anymore. Of course they wouldn't even think to care about China.

China opened the door to see a man, in his fifties, lying down weakly on the bed. it was the first class room; with the bed occupying the middle of the room, two nice beige sofa on the side, a table with nice flower in a vase on it, and a 24 inch flat TV on the wall showing news.

"…Father."

"Yao."

The man was smiling at him, but it was clear that dialysis done nothing good on him. He looked so much weaker than what China remembered, and those hands, whose hands he used to love because they were big and strong and always held him in weekends, has wilted into bone covered with skin.

China walked towards the bed. His father was smiling.

"How… is life, my …son?"

"I am fine, aru." China nodded. "Life is good."

"Good…" His father smiled weakly between his laboured breaths. "I always regretted for… never coming to your graduation… Thinking I can do it once… you finish uni… well. Now I cannot leave this room… Funny, huh?"

China looked away, searching for England. But England was standing by the door frame, furthest from where China was standing. China immediately understood he couldn't turn to England to get support, so he looked forward. And watched how his father has become so frail. How his mother has become so small. How they were in front of him, smiling and looking good together. They looked like the perfect couple. China used to be proud having them as his parent. But they didn't love each other anymore. Maybe even from the start. So maybe he was a sad case. Maybe China being born was a mistake. And now they were gone, frail, small, and they were looking straight at China, their only son, the mistake which turned to be the only possible salvation.

And so he made his decision.

"…It's Ok. Graduations are boring and unimportant, aru."

"Do you… have a wife-to-be… in mind?"

"…I do, aru."

"You need to… introduce her … to me sometime, before…"

"You don't need to wait. He is here, aru. Father, this is Arthur Kirkland, my partner."

England was surprised when China walked towards him, pulled his hand, and walked together to the bedside. China's mother twitched in discomfort, but his father was smiling.

"I knew it… You are afraid of woman because of our divorce… right?"

"No. I had girlfriends, aru. It's just… he was the only one who stayed with me by the end of the day. Unlike you. Or mother."

His father frowned. "I don't like the way you…. Put it. It's not like that, son…"

"Stop pretending to be my father and trying to make me offering my kidney, aru. You and I know what's happening here. You might just as well offer your money for my kidney, aru."

China's biological parents looked embarrassed and sad; both looking at each other for help. England could feel that China's hand was shaking. But his voice was as clear as ever, resonating through the room.

"Tell me, aru. Am I right that I am called here just to provide you a kidney? Or do you really… did miss me, aru?"

Everybody could tell how China felt hurt by his own wording. His mother opened her mouth, but China stopped her.

"No. Listen to me. You never listen to me, ever since I was small, aru. And it was my fault too, for never tells you what I felt. I am silent, thinking that it's Ok, being alone in the house in weekdays because in weekends you will be home and played with me. In weekends, I am Ok with being alone, thinking that at least, at least we will have the Sunday night dinner together in the Chinese restaurant. And I am fine, being silent in the Chinese restaurant, because although you are always fighting with each other, at least you were both there, and both of you gave me piles of food on my plate aru.

"I am fine with the divorce. I am fine with new families. But I am not fine with the dinner. Because you bring something else into the only thing that I looked forward in a week. Because it destroyed my only good memory of you. Because my plate stayed empty until the end. I was… disappointed. Jealous. Why you look so happy and peaceful when we were sitting with foreign families with foreign children, while I am hungry and alone and my plate was empty, even though I was… I was you two's only son? …Was I even your son?"

"Yao… we never realized we hurt…" His mother started to cry, but China ignored her.

"I didn't know they were your affairs back then. But now everything makes sense. You were relieved when I said I want to get out of the country, right? You were happy because then you don't need to fight over my custody. Because frankly, I am an ugly remainder of what a rotten marriage you two had. So I know my place, I disappeared. And don't tell me it's not true, because even a stranger can tell how suspicious it was to have an 11 years old boy working in Mc D***. An eight years old boy sat, waiting for a nonexistent letter in front of boarding house. A seventeen years old boy who skipped grades and getting scholarship, yet with nobody to share the joy with when he was chosen as the best student of the year in his graduation. They thought I was an orphan of some sort, aru. Maybe they were right, because I don't have parent who would care, aru.

"You never care, you just wanted to give me money, to cover your guilt, or maybe I am wrong, since you just want your face, but all these years… you never really tried to contact me, so neither I did, aru. I understand that I am a mistake. But I have made it all up with my early independency. And now… asking me to give you my kidney… don't you feel ashamed of yourself, aru?"

"…My son…"

"Are you sure I am your son? You were never there and I never remember having any kind of help from you since I went away, aru. I didn't use your money, I didn't use your name, I don't use your influence. I am what I am now because of me alone. And now… you call me your son when it's convenient for you? Isn't it a bit too cruel? What do you think I am?"

"Yao…"

"I am here because he made me, aru. Arthur is everything I have, the only one who will love me, aru. So you don't get to call him sin, mother. You don't get to judge my choice, father. You don't have the right to see me as a son. Not anymore."

China's tears started to fall. He turned back, burying himself inside England's chest, clutching tight. "I am finished. Bring me out, Arthur. Take me out aru. Please. I don't want to be here."

"Yao…" His father's voice was hesitant. "I never know, and we …never thought… Do you want to come back? Is that money what you want?"

That was it.

"NOW! ARTHUR, GET ME OUT FROM HERE!"

England nodded and carried the sobbing man out. China sobbed, surrendering his whole to England to guide him. He was breaking into pieces. All the emotions he had buried in his memories flooded out. It felt so painful that China couldn't help but sobbing like a child who was lost in the mall and realized nobody was searching for him.

England guided them to the empty corner of the corridor and sat on the sofa with China on his lap. The sofa was cold, but China wasn't cold because England's lap and arms gave him so much warmth he needed. His sobbed hasn't stop and yet to stop. It was a lifetime worth of crying, and China didn't have the will to stop.

"You did good, Yao." England whispered. "You did good." He gently patted the Asian who was sobbing hard against his blazer.

"You did good."

"…"

"Do you want to go home now?"

To England's surprise, China shook his head.

"…You want to stay?"

China nodded, despite the continuous sobbing. England nodded softly.

"All right."

"Bring …hhh… me… to the… lab…hhh… aru."

"What lab, Yao?"

"To… test… whether I am…hhh… compatible… with… kidney… transplant, aru…"

England clutched the distressed beauty tighter. "Why…? You don't need to—I think you had made your point clear, Yao. You don't need to do it, sacrificing yourself anymore, Yao."

"He… is still my father." China sobbed. "I want to show… that a mistake like me… can be useful, aru. I want.. hhh… him to ….live."

And China sobbed again, continuing his rush of emotion, channelling all the emotions to sobs. England sighed softly. "… You did good, Yao. It's all fine now."


* = Mei is name for Taiwan in most of the ff I know.

**= I am liking the word torture. I typed it over and over again.

****= Mc. Donald. Dont sue me.

If you read this, and think it's a crap, please tell me to my face. I can handle a pussy fight here. but for others who kindheartedly think this is good, please review so. I would be very happy to have a boost of serotonin in the middle of my mid life crisis.