Shinpachi paused in front of the apartment/temple thingy, as Yamazaki's head tilted back to look at it. It was completely quiet, and the house was dark. "That's odd…" Yamazaki murmured. "Somebody should be here."
"Well, one of them works at the same place my sister does. I'm not certain what the other one does though."
Shinpachi stepped up to the door, knocking loudly. "Excuse me, is anyone home?"
Silence. Yamazaki began patting down his pockets, before pulling out a badge. "Excuse me, this is the Shinsengumi- we're coming in-"
The door slid open to a scene of destruction. The table was smashed, and pieces of cheap looking pottery decorated the floor. Shinpachi looked around, looking panicked. "Where- where's the priestesses?"
Yamazaki shrugged as he knelt down, searching for any trace of what happened- obviously a fight, but were there two bodies lying around? "Shinpachi, its best if you stay here while I go and investigate-"
"THIEVES! THIEVES! SOMEBODY CALL THE POLICE! THIEVES!"
Yamazki turned to see a frail, old looking grandma waving her cane at them as she shouted on the top of her lungs. Heads were poking out of doorways, and fear began to worm its way onto Yamazaki's face as he took a step back. "I am the Po-"
"THEY'RE CLAIMING THEY'RE POLICE! THIEVES! THI—"
"SHUT UP OLD LADY!" Came another answering roar.
"DON'T INTERRUPT UNLESS YOU WANT ME TO DO XXXX!"
"YEAH RIGHT, IF YOU TRY I'LL XXXX YOUR *Censored*!"
Shinpachi looked at Yamazaki, as he began edging for the door. "I'll leave it to you, Yamazaki."
He darted for the door, and managed to escape through it, leaving behind the hapless, defenseless Yamazaki. "NO! Shinpachi! Come back! Don't leave me here alone with this old lady!"
"Jimmy hiding in plain sight skill- BEGIN!" Was Shinpachi's only reply, as like a master Jimmy, he began disappearing into the crowd, mixing like a master Jimmy he was and fading from sight.
That was, of course, until the largest man they had ever seen, wearing a western-style suite and a large scar across his face, appeared in front of him. "So, you're the thief trying to steal from the Miko, eh?"
Shinpachi's right eye twitched, as a look of total horror crossed his face. Yamazaki was tempted to burst out laughing, but the mans gaze twitched towards him, he shut up, and took a step back. The old woman smirked.
The man's hand descended upon the old woman's shoulder as he said, "Miss Thief, I suggest you come with me."
Then, with an indomitable glint, and moving through the crowds like a bulldozer, he left behind the two stunned, unexpectedly grateful men. "Th-That was close."
Yamazaki turned to Shinpachi. "You tried to abandon me."
"Survival instinct." Came back the prompt reply as he stared straight ahead.
"Wouldn't it of been better for you to stick with me?"
"And watch you get arrested by your own teammates?" The glasses gleamed impenetrably, as Shinpachi did not look at Yamazaki. The spy's eyes narrowed, before he sighed as his stomach gurgled mournfully.
"We're not going to find out what's going on if we just stand here. Let's get something to eat."
Shinpachi looked away, waving a hand. "You go ahead. I'm going to ask around-" Shinpachi's stomach gurgled, which he ignored. "Besides, I'm not very hungry."
"No, no, you look ready to faint from hunger? Is it just because you're poor? I can buy."
"R-Really?" A sparkling, pink background surrounded Shinpachi as he looked at the Spy.
Yamazaki could feel heat creeping into his face as he waved a hand back and forth. "Sure, just so long as you promise not to try and abandon me like you just did."
"Done-" Shinpachi's eyes widened as he grabbed Yamazaki's wrist, pulling him forward as he brought out his Shinai to block the falling sword. Yamazaki turned, pulling out his badminton racket.
"You have got to be kidding me." Shinpachi breathed as a large group of men began to form out of the surrounding crowd, each holding weapons.
"Yamazaki, you wouldn't happen to of made someone mad recently, have you?"
"No. Are they part of a fan-club you've beaten down?"
"Nope." Shinpachi drew his shinai, back to back with Yamazaki. "Due to unfortunate circumstances I haven't been able to go to a concert in several weeks. I'm sorry my one and only love!"
As Shinpachi clenched a fist and looked up to the sky crying, Yamazaki kept a wary eye on the enemies.
A sword swept downwards, as the two automatically leaped sideways. "Erm, Yamazaki…"
"Yes Shinpachi?"
"S-Should we run?"
"Yep."
With that eloquent speech hanging in the air, both began to run, Yamazaki's badminton racket breaking over one of the large goon's head. "GIN-SAN! HELP!"
Gintoki looked up from where he had managed to successfully mug a passerby and regain clothing. Silently he put his pinky in his ear and wiggled it, before looking up again. "Oy, perm-head, what do you think you're doing?"
"My Danger Sense is quivering."
"JUST WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE? SPIDERMAN? FORGET DANGER SENSE AND HELP ME TO BREAK INTO MY HOUSE BEFORE THE OLD BAT MANAGES TO SELL IT!"
"No, no," Gintoki continued, ignoring the raging Vice-commander, as he put his finger in his ear again, "I mean it. My Danger Sense is quivering- I should go find my costume."
"I ALREADY TOLD YOU THAT YOU'RE NOT A SUPERHERO!"
Hijikata took a deep breath, before looking away. As if right on cue, his Okita Sense quivered. "Sugou must be in trouble."
Gintoki sneered. "Bwahahaha! What kind of moron are you? Senses? What do you think you are; some kind of a Western Superhero?"
A vein on his temple was throbbing. "You moron! You were the one who first came up with it!"
"Huh? Is the feared 'vice-commander' a man who actually likes playing with dolls? Oh, yeah, that's right, you just gave in to that cursed sword, didn't you, so that way you didn't feel the need to hide it. Poor Gorilla-san to have such a bad person on his tea-"
Gintoki ducked the sword swing, as Hijikata thinly smiled. "Oops. It slipped from my hands."
Gintoki's eyes went flatter then their normal Dead-Fish-Eyes© (Now available in stores beside your Justaway) as his foot flew out, just barely missing Hijikata's head. "Oops. My foot slipped on a conveniently placed banana left by the Gorilla you call Commander."
Hijikata sneered, thin-lipped as eyes met and clashed. It was war.
Conveniently forgetting the fact that Hijikata was still trying to properly retrieve his clothes, the writer conveniently wrote: 'In a flash of black, tinged with gold, the handsome man thrust, grinning as a gasp filled the air. He leaned close to the pale face, breath coming out in small puffs as he whispered, "You can do better then that."
'In answer a moan filled the air, as he thrust again-'
*This Scene was Interrupted, and Erased due to Content. Please Excuse us While we Find the Original Content-*
'Hijikata pulled back, smirking in triumph at the pale man beneath him. The normally messy hair was tousled even further, and the Samurai looked rather stunned as he pulled back. "Come now, lets see you do something else. I'm going to enjoy your screams.".'
*Excuse us while we lock up the Yaoi Fangirl that has gotten their hands on this Fanficiton. We will be back in one minute.*
Hijikata leaned against the conveniently wall as the words imprinted themselves above them. "Crap."
Gintoki sighed as he stayed as far away from the man as possible. "Well, at least the story can't move on, right?"
A man clad in a black and red suite dropped before them, the spider markings clear on the skin-tight body suite. "I am Spider-man, here to steal upside-down kisses from every girl possible!"
"Wha-"
The man looked around, before looking to the top of the page. "Whoops. Wrong fandom. Sorry."
With that, he disappeared in a flash. Gintoki groaned as he massaged his forehead. "I gotta find the kids."
"Well, the idiot is with the alien, and Yamazaki is with Shinpachi."
"I'm surprised you know his name."
"One of Kondo's rules, all Shinsengumi members are to be nice to him so that way he can win over his sister."
"Oh. Gorilla-san wants to take the path through being her brothers' friend huh?"
"Yep. He got it from one of the gal-games he was playing."
Silence fell, before Hijikata groaned. "Screw this. I'm going to find a plot hole and use it to get my clothing back."
Gintoki jerked a thumb at a sale going down the street. "Or you could get your Authentic Shinsengumi Clothing from the old man down the street."
A black cloud of menace gathered around Hijikata's head, and a deep breath filled the air. It slowly came out in a long puff of cigarette smoke. "I'm going. Then we're going."
Gintoki flapped a hand at him, "Yes, yes."
As Hijikata turned around to leave, a thought made his pause as he snagged the other man around the neck. "You're coming with me. I don't trust you to not go after I leave."
"Well China, you've done it again."
Eyes narrowed as the Amanto shifted against the chains, trying to get a little more comfortable. The chains clinked in response, and the girl sighed.
She was practically suspended in mid-air from all of the chains, each link thick as a thumb. Okita had to settle with just being chained to the wall: Obviously they thought she was the worse of the two. "Why do you get so many chains?"
"Sadist, don't make me talk, or I'll puke all over you." Kagura warned, as she shifted again. The chains were biting into her skin painfully, and it was a little hard to breathe from the chains that wrapped around her chest. "I wonder who got us."
"How am I supposed to know? Must be a pervert though-" Kagura paused, trying to breathe as the chains tightened. Okita glanced up, something like, but not quite concern in his eyes.
The door swung open, and a man in a dumpy looking black cloak from too many super-villain stories stepped inside. However...
Okita watched as he quite calmly ignored the captured Shinsengumi member to grab Kagura by the chin. The Amanto regarded him through steadily narrowing eyes, as Okita stomped on the urge to snarl at the man.
She was his prey, no one elses'… "Hmm, you'll do. I know a lot of men that would love to try breaking in a girl. Especially one of such a hated race as the Amanto. You'll be a good attar-"
A shoe hit the man squarely in the face, as a gob of spit smacked him in the eye. "IT BURNS! IT BURNS! IT HURTS!"
Okita blinked as he carefully tucked one socked foot out of view of China, as Kagura snarled at the man. "You think I'm going to give in, uh-huh? I'll kill anyone of you that tries!"
An unwilling smile curved his lips. That- that was definitely China.
"Well, why did you capture us anyways Shoe-Imprint Guy?"
"Don't call me that! Besides which, everyone knows that if the Yoryuza becomes involved with something then something else is going to be destroyed! It's happened over and over again. So it's better to split you up where you guys can't do anything!"
China let loose a small, low laugh, as her head fell, bangs covering her eyes. When she looked up again, the Shoe-Imprint Guy recoiled. "Huhuh- If you think we're strong together, you ought to see us apart! Gin-san will definitely come for me, as will Four-eyes. Then we're going to tear down this place."
"Ha- Good luck having them find you. They ought to be having lots of trouble right now." The man tried a confident smirk.
The effect was spectacularly ruined by something yellow dripping from a pants leg. The Shoe-Imprint Guy fled.
"So, China-"
"Use my name correctly Sadist!"
"China, do you have any idea what happened?"
Kagura shook her head, before her eyes widened. "Ah! Sadaharu! Where is he?"
"Don't know. When I woke up we were already here."
"Fine job you did, snoring away." Kagura muttered. "Grrr- GIN-SAN!"
Something deep within him twitched at her reliance on Gin-san. Gin-san this, Gin-san that. It could make a guy puke.
Angrily he regarded a wall, wondering why exactly he cared.
a/n: Chapter two! Yayz! I hope you enjoyed! (And no, I don't have anything against fan-girls, I simply put it there for humor purposes. Please don't take offense) And please Review!
