It was an average abandoned, supposedly-haunted mansion- furniture covered with sheets, dust-covered tchotches lining many flat surfaces, brick and hardwood and a massive stone fireplace off to one side of the parlor.
"Not bad," Ashley murmured. "With some work, this place could be stunning."
As they were taking in their home for the night, they suddenly heard a clatter, mingled with a long, consistent scrape.
Nikki jumped into Jackson's arms, sending his guitar case tumbling to the floor. Taylor whimpered and grabbed Ashley's arm; Kristen gasped and whirled around, arms up and ready to fight.
Rob threw himself flat against the wall. "Jesus Christ, what the fucking hell was that?"
The room was filled with laughter. Not the menacing, ghostly kind, but the booming, jock kind.
"God, you guys, it was just Kellan!" scolded Kristen. "Why the fuck did you move that bureau in front of the door?"
"So none of you could puss out. Plus, who knows what's out there at night? You're much safer, trapped in here with friends. Especially since *I* am one of your friends," Kellan winked, flexing.
Rob inched away from the wall, pulled out a pack of smokes and lit one. "Christ, my heart is pounding."
"Ooh, Rob, can I borrow your lighter?"
"Ashley, why would I give you the only working source of light in this house? I've tried every light switch and lamp I hardly trust myself with this lighter."
"Fine, you can start a fire in this gorgeous fireplace yourself, then."
Rob looked at it with disgust. "Do you think old Mrs. Allen ever had this chimney swept? Or used a creosote sweeping log? And how long has it been since she lived here? Do you know about creosote? And there are probably birds nests and other shit in the chimney too. This house could catch on fire and we would all d-HOLY SHIT WHAT WAS THAT?"
Rob plastered himself against the wall again. "Something touched my leg you guys, shit, I swear, something touched my leg. This house really is haunted, god, Kellan, move that fucking thing away from the door!" He scrambled, back never leaving the wall, toward the door.
"I'm not letting you out, dude. It was probably just a mouse or a roach or something. This is an empty house. I bet it's not as bad as the stuff lurking in that dingy hut you share with Tom. And why the hell are you sticking to the wall like that?"
"Kellan, I watch those fucking horror films. I know people always get taken from behind. Plus, there are no black people or blonde girls here. They're gonna get the Brit first!"
"I can understand your fear of being taken from behind. I'm sure you have to walk around that way at home too."
Everyone else laughs and Taylor is especially happy that Kellan has found someone else to mock for awhile. Over the group's jeering, Rob starts to get defensive.
"I've told you all a million times, it isn't like that. He's like my brother, and we don't fu-"
TICK-tock…TICK-tock…TICK-tock…CUCKOO CUCKOO CUCKOO CUCKOO CUCKOO CUCKOO CUCKOO CUCKOO CUCKOO CUCKOO CUCKOO CUCKOO …TICK-tock…TICK-tock…TICK-tock…
Everyone screamed. Nikki flattened herself against the wall next to Rob. Rob scuttled as close as he could get to Ashley, tossed her the lighter, and begged her to start a fucking fire already.
"It's just a clock, dumbasses," said Kristen, trying to keep her voice from trembling.
"It's 9:23. That had to be more than 9 cuckoos, and isn't it only supposed to do that on the hour?" Taylor said with his back turned so the group couldn't see his tears.
Jackson laughed. "Like we know how a fucking cuckoo clock works."
From flat against the wall, Nikki added, "Why did it only start ticking now?"
