EsméPOV - Post Eclipse

'Oh!'

'What was that, Alice?' I asked, it seemed she had just had a vision.

Alice looked up with an elated expression on her face, 'Oh, Esmé! You're going to have a very good time today!'

I looked at her in surprise, 'I am? I hadn't planned on anything…just a bit of grocery shopping.' I expected Alice to tell me more, at least to give me a hint of what was to come.

'Oh no, Esmé, I wouldn't want to ruin the surprise,' she said with a mischievious grin. I smiled back affectionately.

Of my two daughters, it was Alice I felt closest to. Even though I had known Rosalie for longer and I still loved her very much - it was Alice who I felt most secure and easy going with. Perhaps that was just her nature but I knew that she would never judge, never complain and never say or hear a bad word against me or the ones I cared about.

I wondered about Bella, would our relationship be like that? If all went according to plan, she would become one of us soon after the upcoming wedding. Her relationship with Edward was so unique, I had never spoken to any of my children before they were changed. This time, I knew Bella; I had cooked for her and talked with her. True, I wished I knew her better but there was really never much time. She was always sleeping or with Edward - both activities taking up a lot of her time. There will be plenty of time after she is changed, I told myself and went back to studying the Home Improvements magazine which had arrived that morning.

--

Around the time most humans would be finishing lunch, I took my red Audi R8 into Forks for some shopping. Usually, I brought enough groceries to satisfy a human family oursize then just took it down to the homeless centre in Port Angeles. It was a lot of running around but it helped keep up the charade - and I enjoyed feeling the wind in my hair as I kicked the car up to 160 mph.

Lately, I had had to keep some of the groceries for Bella, often she stayed over for dinner and breakfast the next day.

Bella is coming around for dinner this evening, I thought, I want to make something special. I mentally ran through various cookbooks and recipes. I finally decided on a Indian curry - nothing too spicy - with a cheesecake for dessert just as I arrived at the supermarket.

As I hopped out of the car, pulling my ecobags and designer handbag from the passenger seat, I heard a loud noise that nearly hurt my sensitive ears but I smiled. The loud noise was also very familiar to me - it was the sound of Bella's truck. I turned to see Bella, by herself, at the far end of the parking lot, sliding out of her truck. I hoped this was what Alice had meant when she said I was going to have a good time today.

I quickly crossed to the end of the parking lot where Bella was parked, my excitement growing exponetially. Bella rounded the end of truck and caught sight of me.

'Esmé!' she seemed excited to see me as well, causing my undead heart to swell. 'What are you doing here?'

'Doing the grocery shopping of course!' I said with a laugh. As I reached her, I pulled her in to a hug and she gave me a kiss on the cheek. 'Shall we shop together?' I asked.

'Of course,' Bella replied with a smile.

--

Walking through the fruit and vegetable section of the supermarket I asked Bella what she had been up to.

'Well, yesterday I came over to your house and we went for a picnic,' she said with a blush. I laughed.

'Bella dear, don't worry. I couldn't possibly be against ditching class - all my children do it on a regular basis.' This time we both laughed because it was so true.

'So did you and Edward have a nice time?' I asked.

'Oh no, it wasn't just us. Rose, Emmett, Alice and Jasper came as well,' she replied. Noting the surprise on my face, she added, 'Yeah, I was surprised they came along as well. It was Alice's idea, but still…,' she said trailing off.

I sensed that when she said they, she really meant Rosalie. 'Rosalie does try her hardest, Bella. She really does,' I said.

'Yeah, I know she does. It has definitely become easier - I think she's really starting to accept me,' Bella replied with a small smile. 'We did some online shopping down by the lake.'

'Oh, excellent! The best way to Rose's heart is via presents,' I said. It was a well-known fact in our family - Jasper hadn't really won her acceptance until he had arranged for her to test drive a new McLaren F1 around one of the most prestigious race tracks in America.

Bella looked worried, 'I don't have much to give her though.'

'Oh, but you do Bella! You have the best gift of all. You have given Rose the opportunity to experience life through a human perspective. You may have not seen the change in her, but we certainly have. Although she may not show it as pointedly as Alice does; but she lives through you,' I replied passionately.

'Oh,' was all Bella could manage.

As we were passing through the sauces, I remembered tonight's dinner. 'You don't mind curry, do you Bella?'

'No, curry's great,' she said absentmindedly.

I wondered what was troubling her. I put my hand on hers hesitantly, 'What's wrong, Bella?'

She snapped out of her reverie and I snatched my hand back, fearing she did not want to be consoled. But as she looked up, her chocolate brown eyes welled with tears and I could not help but pull her to my stone chest.

As I enveloped her in my cold arms, the tears began to fall freely and her sobs shook her body. I hushed and rocked her gently in my arms, looking around but luckily this corner of the store was fairly empty. I felt her step back away from me and I released her from my grip.

'I'm sorry, Esmé,' she hiccuped.

'Nonsense, Bella! You are as much my daughter as Alice or Rosalie. If there is anything you want to talk about or you need, don't even think of hesitating,' I said, pulling her into another hug.

'It's just…everything...is just…,'she said, unable speak coherently through her tears.

'Ssshhh, Bella. Let's go sit down and talk,' I said, rubbing her back reassuringly. I quickly found a store attendant who I gave 10 dollars to hold our trolleys, half full of items until we came back.

I steered Bella towards the café located next to supermarket and sat her down in a quiet corner booth.

'Is there anything I can get you ladies?' the waitress asked. Obviously I wouldn't be having anything but I thought Bella might like some chocolate - something I greatly missed from my former life.

'Just some water and a large chocolate cookie,' I said twisting around to see their selection. 'The triple chocolate one, thanks.'

Bella looked at me with wide eyes, a tissue dabbing at her mascara smears and runs. 'How did you know?' she said with a small smile.

I laughed, 'Of all the things I miss from my past, chocolate has got to be the second greatest.'

'What's the first?' Bella asked, before gasping and slapping a hand over her mouth. 'I'm so sorry, Esmé!'

I leaned over to rest my hand on hers, 'Don't worry, Bella. Although it makes me sad, I know that he's not coming back. I've just had to learn to move past it.'

The truth was it ripped my heart apart everytime I thought of the little boy I had lost. I visited his grave every year and each year it was no easier. I could never bring myself to say the words 'moved on' as if it was something in my life that I could leave behind. Even though I thought about him every day, I could bring myself to admit that he is part of my past and that's where he will remain.

Fresh tears welled in Bella's eyes. 'That's what I'm actually worried about,' she said, lowering her eyes to her lap.

I gasped, 'You're not…?'

'God, no!' Bella said with an equal amount of shock, shaking her head vehemently.

I didn't know how to feel. It may have been nice to have a grandchild. I nearly giggled. No, it would have been fantastic to have a granchild. But I was glad, she was so young and it couldn't possibly be Edward's. I rebuked myself for thinking it.

Obviously not offended by my comment, Bella continued. 'I'm scared…of losing everyone. Charlie, Renee, Phil even. I mean, I know I'm going to be happy with you guys, but I've really come to realise how much everyone means to.'

'Bella, it's totally natural to be feeling that way. Don't think that this decision is easily made. Imagine how different it would have been if Carlisle hadn't found me dying. Could I have ever made the decision to become a vampire? I don't know, but I know I wouldn't have made it lightly.'

'But the thing is,' she replied, 'I know I want to become one of you. I'm not afraid of the pain, the thirst or anything like that. But Charlie! Who will look after him? He can barely use the microwave, for Christs sakes! And I won't be around for a year or more!' This brought out a new round of tears.

I scooted my chair around to Bella's and put my arm around her shoulders. 'Sshh, Bella. Have faith, Charlie managed to survive all these years without you. Don't you think he'll be able to manage a little longer? We'll still be around to drop by him every now and again so you'll be able hear how he's going. But you do know, that if you ever had any second thoughts about doing this, you will talk to Edward, won't you? I couldn't bear it if you came into our lives not 100 percent certain that this is what you want.'

Bella sighed. I continued, 'All Edward wants is your happiness. He certainly wouldn't begrudge you a few years if you wanted to leave Charlie at a more gradual rate.'

'You're so right, Esmé. Thanks for listening, I know I look like such a fool.' She tried to go on but I interrupted, 'Bella, you never looked more beautiful. As my daughter I want you to know that human or vampire, we will always love you. Everyone will always love just the way you are.'

A smile lit up her tear-stained face. 'I think I'm going to be okay,' she said, sounding very relieved. 'Shall we get back to the shopping?'

--

When I arrived home from the shopping, later than usual that afternoon, Alice bounded down to help me with the remaining groceries.

'Did you enjoy yourself, Esmé?' she asked.

I grinned, I had enjoyed myself immensly that afternoon. It seemed my wishes for a better relationship with Bella had been answered.

Rosalie came down the stairs to discuss some curtains that she wanted to put in Bella and Edward's little cottage that we were renovating as a wedding present for them.

After a while we heard the soft purring of Edward's Volvo down the driveway. As they both walked into the house, hand in hand Emmett dragged Edward away to play some new video game and Bella joined us in the kitchen.

She smiled knowingly and I hoped she was more resolved after our discussion.

I was happy. I had my three daughters. I had my three sons. I had a beautiful husband. I was so happy.

--

A/N: Well, there's another conversation with a vampire for you! It was really interesting to write from Esmé's point of view. It's so different from everyone else. Anyway I know there are people out there reading this, thanks to all for the alerts and favourites! Please review, let me know how I'm going or if you've got any more suggestions! I want to hear from you!!! x

Link for Esmé's Audi R8:

http : // i163 . photobucket . com / albums / t294 / groovy_person11 / esmesaudir8 . jpg