Me- ok, I've been thinking…
Everyone- (thinking 'wow I'm surprised!')
Me- Inuyasha, Sesshomaru, I know you have a lot of problems. Is there any way you can work this out?
Inuyasha and Sesshomaru- No.
Jaken- my master does not speak with petty half-breeds such as Inuyasha.
Inuyasha- why you little—FUCKING IMP!
Me- Jaken, you seem to serve Fluffy loyally.
Sesshomaru- my name is Sesshomaru.
Me- whatever. So, is there anything you want to say to Fluffy?
Sesshomaru- (yells in background) SESSHOMARU—!
Jaken- well…it would be nice to get some recognition for my services. That little Brat gets more attention than I do!
Sesshomaru- (steps on his face) leave Rin out of this.
Jaken- (from under Sesshomaru's shoe) yes milord.
Jaken's staff- (laughs at him in background)
Jaken- (gives staff middle finger)
Staff- (burns him to a crisp)
Jaken- damnit…
Me- ok, now that he's out of the way…(to Inuyasha and Sesshomaru) you two are brothers. While it's normal to fight every now and then, hating each other and trying to kill one another is a bit more than sibling rivalry. So, Fluffy, why do you hate Inuyasha?
Inuyasha- Ain't it obvious?
Jaken- (who's now a pile of ashes) Show my master some respect wench and call him Lord Sesshomaru!
Sesshomaru- (major anger cross)
Me- Ok, 'Sesshomaru'. Why do you hate Inuyasha? Don't be shy; we're here to find your inner selves.
Inuyasha- (in a mocking voice) we're here to find your inner selves cuz you don't have a life and—I'm gonna rip your fucking head off if you don't stop butting into our business!
Kagome- Sit. (Inuyasha grumbles in background)
Sesshomaru- the reason I hate Inuyasha is none of your business, as is nothing we do to each other. But since we're not free to leave until our problems are solved, I will comply. My hatred of Inuyasha is because he's a half-breed and can wield the Tetsusaiga when I can't. Even though I would use the Tetsusaiga for a much better cause than he. Also, I hate his love for these worthless humans.
Kagome- hey!
Inuyasha- ha! You're just jealous because I'm better than you and you know it! (Points finger at Sesshomaru)
Sesshomaru- (anger cross) AND HE CUT—MY FUCKING—ARM OFF! (Jabs finger at arm. Anger cross throbs and threatens to explode)
Inuyasha- YOU DESERVED IT FOR DISRUPTING FATHER'S TOMB AND TRYING TO KILL KAGOME! NOT TO MENTION PULLING THAT CRAP WITH MY MOTHER!
Sesshomaru- IF YOU TOLD ME WHERE IT WAS IN THE FIRST PLACE I WOULDN'T HAVE NEEDED HER!
Inuyasha- I DIDN'T KNOW WHERE IT WAS UNTIL YOU RIPPED THE FUCKING THING OUT OF MY EYE! WHICH HURT BY THE WAY!
Kagome- Inuyasha calm down!
Inuyasha- stay outta this Kagome! I'm gonna finish this ONCE AND FOR ALL! I'LL KILL YOU!
Fluffy- Good idea, however it is YOU who will die today! AND STOP CALLING ME FLUFFY!
Me- (laughing uncontrollably)
Shippo- (sighs) sometimes I just wanna put them in a room and have them battle it out…
Sango- (grumbles) I know what you mean…
Me- hmm…you know, that's kinda a good idea, but I don't want either of them dying…
Kagome- yah, it could get pretty rough…
Inuyasha and Sesshomaru- (still yelling and threatening each other. Lightning bolt connects their foreheads zapping fiercely)
Me- OK YOU TWO! SHUTT—UPP! We all know why you hate each other, so now we gotta figure out how to fix that…any ideas?
Inuyasha- I could just kill him…
Me- THAT'S NOT AN OPTION!
Inuyasha- well, jeez, you don't have to have a hissy fit…
Me- I'LL HAVE A HISSY FIT IF I WANT TO!
Inuyasha- looks like you could use some anger management…
Me- KAGOME SIT HIM FOR ME WOULD YA!
Kagome- SIT!
Inuyasha- oww…(gets up and mumbles under breath) not my fault she has problems…
Me- ok, I'm ok…now. Sesshomaru, I can see why you're frustrated about getting stuck with a sword that doesn't cause harm. But I think I know why your father gave it to you. Can you guess?
Sesshomaru- as you should know, if I knew why he gave it to me, I wouldn't be frustrated about it. So just spit it out human, I haven't all day.
Me- jeez, you guys need proper educate too, how about just being polite once in a while?
Sesshomaru- (gives me disinterested look)
Me- fine. I think your father left you Tenseiga to protect your brother.
Sesshomaru- (scoffs) I doubt that you are correct.
Inuyasha- yah, that's ridiculous—I don't need protection!
Everyone else and Audience- …no comment…
Me- Think about it! Your father made the Tetsusaiga to protect your mother, and knew his first son couldn't wield it! He also must have feared for your life Inuyasha, so he needed a way to protect you! How else than to make a sword that could heal?
Inuyasha- Except for the fact that I don't need protection. I have Tetsusaiga.
Me- true, but when you were younger you didn't, and you didn't have it until just recently. Then you had to find out how to use it, you almost got killed in the process, but eventually, yah, you probably don't need protection now.
Inuyasha- exactly.
Audience and everyone- (rolls eyes. Sweatdrops) idiot…
Me- but it still ensures your safety. He probably didn't expect you to learn so quickly.
Inuyasha- I'm his kid, why wouldn't he expect it?
Me- you're missing the point…
Sesshomaru- I have a point to make. Did he actually believe I was going to protect a half-breed?
Kagome- well that's what family USUALLY does!
Sesshomaru- between humans, maybe, but demons are different wench, you need to understand that.
Kagome- it's no different!
Inuyasha- Kagome let him be. He obviously isn't going to admit he's embarrassed!
Sesshomaru- (anger cross throbs) I don't get embarrassed.
Me- so, you're going to forsake your father's wishes?
Sesshomaru- father was a fool to love a human!
Inuyasha- yet you care about Rin don't you?
Sesshomaru- Rin has nothing to do with this, leave her out of it!
Inuyasha- Just admit it! You have the same weakness with humans that father did! You've gone soft!
Me- you know, once you open up, it's that much easier to overcome your differences. And that's why we're here, so you aren't leaving until then. I'm getting hungry myself, and the caffeine's starting to wear off, so I suggest hurrying up.
Sesshomaru- you're right, I do care for Rin and I'm not certain as to why, but that still doesn't mean I'm going to protect you.
Me- but what good is it to kill your only brother and take the Tetsusaiga when you have to keep going through arms just to hold it?
Kagome- right, you're already strong, fast, and not to mention clever. You don't even need the Sacred Jewel because of it, so why would Tetsusaiga make any difference?
Sesshomaru- I believe it's hopeless to argue anymore, since I seem to be fighting a loosing battle quickly.
Inuyasha- That's it! surrender!
Sesshomaru- I must admit you humans are making more sense than I've ever thought of. Very well. My hunts for the Tetsusaiga will end as of now, and I will cease to try and kill Inuyasha.
Me- (looks up into heavens) YES LORD! (somewhere in back ground music is turned on--HALELUYA HALELUYA!)
Kagome- good! Now we're getting somewhere!
Me- ok Fluffy, hug and make up!
Sesshomaru- don't push it.
Me- oh come on, show some brotherly love!
Fluffy- as I told you before, my name is Sesshomaru.
Inuyasha- what, you afraid I'll bite? (opens his arms and smirks teasingly)
Me- Do it! Do it! Do it! Do it! Do it! Do it!
Sesshomaru- (gives Inuyasha and I death glares)
Me- ok, well than I guess it's pointless. We'll have to try again tomorrow. Just let me…(scribbles a reminder in notebook) ok! Let's hear from the people who we've been ignoring…let's see…oh! News to Audience! ('if I have one…') I forgot to erase Tsubaki from the list of attendants because I don't know anything about her and I think she's just pure evil so that doesn't help. SO! She's a anger management class dropout! (laughs uncontrollably)
Tsubaki- (from out of nowhere) HEY!
Me- so she's outta the way, but I have another person to take her spot—Kohaku!
Sango- (sobs)
Me- you must be really pissed at Naraku, huh?
Kohaku- (nods)
Me- well, actually, who isn't? everybody who hates Naraku raise your hands!
(every one raises their hands, along with the whole demon world, regular world, the audience and the universe)
me- (Raising both hands while giving Naraku the middle finger—if that's possible…)
Naraku- (gives all of us death glares)
Me- ok, well I think that's all for today people! We'll pick up tomorrow by going back and making fun of Naraku! Stay tuned cuz this is gonna be great! Next time Naraku releases some JUCY secrets and Inuyasha and Sesshomaru HUG! And I'm thinking of attacking Inuyasha…(giggles) Bye for now, but before you go…EVERYBODY POINT AND LAUGH AT NARAKU! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA(cough)HAHAHAHAHA(ech) HAHAHAHA(ouch my sides hurt) BYE BYE MY FRIENDS! (goes back to laughing at Naraku)
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