DISCLAIMER: Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight saga and all the characters. I own nothing except my measly little plot.
A/N: This chapter is dedicated to my husband, who probably barely remembers what I look like without a keyboard and mouse attached to my hands! Thanks to everyone for the hits, reviews and favorites! I'm glad you are enjoying this story as much as I am. My strategies for shopping are based on my own experiences over the years in one small town mall, and my general theories on the retail industry. I never promised they were right!
A/N part 2: sorry! In my haste to post the chapter I forgot to fix a couple cosmetic things...all fixed now :)
Chapter 2: Military Preparations
Jasper POV
"Hey, what is the prize we're playing for anyway?" I looked at my beautiful, crazy wife, flipping through the endless stacks of newspapers hunting down each and every coupon. Honestly, the things she gets us to do…
"Oh, yeah, the prize…," she paused, smiling mysteriously, always dangerous. "What a wonderful surprise that will be!"
"Oookaaay then. So, what's our strategy for this thing? I know you will 'see' all the best deals tomorrow, but I think we might want to plan out our logistics a little bit. That's why you have me, your military strategist!" If I looked at this as a battle, I found it ever so much more entertaining.
"Unfortunately, like I told Rose, what goes on tomorrow is so irrational and completely driven by split second decisions that I am definitely going to be at a disadvantage compared to how I normally operate. Not that there are going to be plenty of opportunities to 'spot' a great deal in advance, but we are definitely going to need your mighty strategies." My little pixie grinned at me, leaping over the mess of papers on the floor and landing daintily at my feet. "So, what did you have in mind?"
I got up, and moved over to big whiteboard we had on the wall of our room. It often came in handy when planning battles over the years, and other, well let's just say more interesting, activities. "Well, the last century or so of following you around and carrying your bags has definitely rubbed off on me. I have formulated a plan that revolves around the following key points:
1. It is a well known fact that in order to get the truly amazing deals (like this $1000 laptop for $50) you need an army of people camped out at as many of the locations of whatever store is offering it, and they needed to be in line this morning at the latest. So, I propose we ignore all those biggies.
1.a. In addition, we also avoid any stores that advertise these things, since most of the other deals won't be that good and the amount of people will be practically insurmountable. It may be possible to check in during the afternoon/evening hours, but we will rely on your visions for that.
2. Most of the stores that have the best deals and reasonable inventory also have coupons. I suggest a two prong attack on that front…you finding the deals, and I optimizing the coupon usage. I plan on studying the internet sites for the stores, to get an idea of things that are eligible for the coupons, this way I can minimize the money we have to waste to use them.
3. After hitting the major department stores, we move on to the smaller, Mom and Pop type stores. These are the next in line to have the best discounts, since they don't have the finances of a major corporation underwriting a season long sale; therefore they try to get the most they can this one day, and hope people come back because they liked the merchandise available.
4. And obviously, the final weapon in our arsenal are our gifts. You will look ahead for any unusual opportunities, focusing on the stores we plan to avoid. We don't want to waste unnecessary time there, or make your focus to great. I will work on trying to persuade other customers that they don't want something we need, and that they aren't really ready to get in line. This should allow us to shop the maximum amount of time without having to waste much in line.
Okay, that is enough from me! I haven't really thought about how we should break down how much money to spend in one place though. What do you think, budget per store, or buy everything and then return what we don't need?" I was unhappy presenting an unfinished plan, but I knew Alice had plenty of ideas.
"Wow, that is quite impressive dear! I think you just earned yourself a step up in rank on our next shopping trip – no longer will you simply have to hold all the bags!" Thank goodness she was smiling her 'I'm just joking Jasper, but don't tell anyone else' smile, or at least, I think she was. Oh dear, what have I gotten myself into now???
She just shook her head and continued, grinning at me like a fool. "Well, I believe that I will 'know' which things we should buy, so it is definitely a good plan to have me go after the deals in the department stores. I already know we will benefit from at least one thing from Macy's, Nordstrom, Dillard's and JC Penney. So, you work on the coupon aspect for those four. We'll just wing it at the other stores, if I find we even need to go. You are definitely right about the 'big deals;' although I am having a fairly strong vision about a fashion makeover software program at Best Buy for 95% off. Regardless of the discount, that may be worth the fight."
"Ah, a virtual Bella Barbie? I think she would appreciate that." There was no way my Alice was going home without that software, so I altered my strategy to definitely include Best Buy. I picked up the flier from the pile and started thumbing through. "Ooh, look at the prices on these video games? Will they have any of the combat ones left by the time we get there?"
Alice ignored my question, stuck on the Bella Barbie comment. "Oh, now that she is perfect like the rest of us, she doesn't mind as much." I just looked at her; I knew exactly how Bella felt about her makeovers, even now. "Well, she hides it better now, since she can't blush! Don't take my fun away from me Jasper!"
"I could never do that to you my love. Obviously she didn't want you to know, so just continue on the way things have always been. Now that you've decided I'll make such a great shopping partner, she'll probably get out of some of those trips…" I tried to mumble that last sentence so she wouldn't hear, but stupid vampire hearing always gets in the way. And why I would think I could hide something from a psychic, I have absolutely no idea.
Alice POV
Oh, I knew it! This is a turn in our relationship I never could have predicted! I don't care if we win the game (OK, yes I do), but now I knew Jasper would really go shopping with me in the future. I saw it all: trips to the Mall of America, the West Edmonton Mall, outlets galore! All hand in hand with Jasper, people conveniently deciding they simply didn't need the last vintage Chanel dress in a size 0! They all thought I was out of control shopping before; there will be no stopping me now!
Oh, that is quite a look I'm getting; I better quit my daydreaming and go back to our "strategy session."
"So, we've covered three of your four 'weapons.' I totally agree about the Mom & Pop stores, especially those that have unadvertised specials. Now, if we combine point 3 and 4, I think you'll find we can be especially successful. As you've pointed out, those stores probably aren't counting on making a huge profit tomorrow; more likely, they want to sell high volume, as well as get a lot of customer traffic that likes what they see and comes back later in the season. The fact that they actually care about their customer's experience is where we have the upper hand. Many of these prices will be open to negotiation…and that, my dear, is exactly your area of expertise!"
Jasper's tentative smile broke wide open when he marveled at these possibilities.
"You cheaters! You are probably going to get everything for free!" Edward whined from his room, hearing what Jasper had been planning in his head.
"Who's the cheater now Edward? Stop eavesdropping and work on your own plan!" He had his own extra abilities that will come in quite handy tomorrow. He's the last one that should be complaining.
"Fine. But you guys are GOING DOWN!" Whew! I don't know how Bella handled him when he got like that. I heard her giggling in the background, so maybe she just thought it was funny.
I tossed Jasper my laptop. "Start your research. Since you are not exactly an expert shopper, I suggest you make a list on the laptop and include pictures and prices of the things you plan to buy. That way, you won't be overwhelmed. Plan it out by store. We will be going to JC Penney first, followed by Macy's, then Dillard's and finally Nordstrom. We can print it out before we leave. I'm going to look over their fliers to get an idea of what I want to buy, and then work over all the other store's possibilities."
We both got to work, building up quite a list. "Honey, do you think you could use a Menopause Survival Kit? It doesn't appear to be on sale and costs 10.99; I could use the '$10 off an eligible purchase of $10 or more' coupon on it and only spend $0.99!" Jasper ran over to me with the laptop to show me what he was looking at.
"What on earth are you talking about? Menopause Survival Kit? Why would I need something like that? Have I finally driven you insane with all my shopping?" I was a little worried that perhaps I had gone too far this time. He looked pretty serious as he brought the description up on the webpage.
"Haha! Gotcha! Although the '0 to Bitch in 10 Seconds' book does look pretty interesting…but surely you don't need the ice pack or 'Hot Flash Mints." Jasper laughed when he realized I was actually worried about him.
"Hardy har har! Back to work, my shopping slave!" He was going to pay for worrying me like that.
I was so excited about tomorrow! It is a good thing I didn't need sleep, because that never would have happened. "JC Penney opens at 3:30, so let's plan to be there at 3:15. There won't be too much of a line, since most crazy people will be stalking the new Playstation at WalMart." Thank goodness we already had two of them, or Jasper never would have let the chance to have one at that price go. "Fortunately, it's going to rain all day, so we won't have to worry about dodging the sun. Unfortunately, that means we can't take the pickup or all of our stuff will get soaked. We're definitely going to have to take two cars. Wait! Did I say we were going to Nordstrom's after Dillard's? We have to go there third, or they will be out of the dress I want. It's perfect for our anniversary dinner; you are really going to appreciate it. Wait! Maybe we need to go there 2nd? But they don't open until 8…" I was pacing around, trying to figure out how it was going to work. Ugh, why couldn't I figure this out???
"Alice, calm down. You said yourself that tomorrow is too unpredictable for you to see anything now. Relax, and look at it again tomorrow when we finish at the first store. I'll just print out each list by store, so I can mix them up in whatever order you come up with. As far as the cars go, I can always wait in line while you drive some of our purchases home…even if I 'persuade' a few people to leave the line, I doubt I'll move ahead by more than 2 people before you can get here and back to the mall, the way you drive!" Jasper rubbed my arm, trying to relax me. He knew I disliked him using his powers over me, so he tried everything normal he could before resorting to extremes. Immediately I relaxed, and smiled softly at him.
"My hero, saving the day as usual." I am really off my game! I must be too focused on the sales to miss simple things like that. I better get my head on straight. I heard a snicker coming from down the hall, so I taunted Edward in my mind. 'Now you'll never get to see what Emmett is going to do tomorrow, you'll just have to imagine how it looked when you hear about it! Nana nana na na!'
I grabbed the laptop out of Jasper's hand and quickly closed the lid. "Let's take a break for a little while, and I'll show you how much I appreciate your help…"
Let Edward try and read my thoughts now…
A/N: I decided to give each team a chapter to plan, and at least one chapter to shop…thereby making the story a little longer. I am having way too much fun with this story, and couldn't resist writing about how each group would go about playing the game. BTW, any thoughts on what the prize might be? Shout outs to any who guess right! Thanks again for reading, and please review!
