Disclaimer:I do not own any of these characters or Naruto in general
Forward: I decided to expand on this a bit and get some more characters POV's on this scene. Just so I can get a feel on these characters a bit more. I'm not sure how well I did with Sai, since he's a bit of a difficult character to get into his mind. But I think I captured his dilemma pretty well. Yet again, Shippings are only there if you you want them to be…I hope you enjoy!
Things were complicated and Sai couldn't understand how this had happened. The mission had been simple. Join Team 7, kill Sasuke, come back and await the next mission. It was even more simple then that, because Sai had no emotions that could blur any lines. So how could he have let this happen?
It was this teams fault, this emotional, crazy, mentally unstable…incredible ninjas. Well, not Yamato so much. After all, Yamato was as much of an outsider in this group as Sai himself was. But those other two…they were the problem. They just never gave up. It wasn't even that they didn't know when to give up, it was that they didn't know how. They were operating on pure determination, stubbornness, and hope. Things that Sai didn't…no, couldn't have. It made absolutely no sense to him.
It wasn't that Sai didn't know what emotions were, it was more that he understood that having emotions was unacceptable. Sai was a weapon and weapons did not have feelings. To become driven by emotion would be the same as becoming weak. Emotions clouded the mind and caused people to make risky decisions that were harmful in the long run. It also gave enemies a weapon more powerful then any other weapon in the world. Shurikens and other weapons could cut you, but those cuts were easily healed. But to be able to cut someone emotionally….those wounds were permanent. Sai only had to look at Team 7 to see that. Sasuke did not lack emotions and that was what made him so powerful. He knew just where to hit Naruto and Sakura so that it would hurt them the most. Emotions were only a weakness, which hurt more then it healed.
But what Sai had never thought of…never even considered, was that emotions could be a strength. It gave you a goal, something to motivate and inspire you. It gave you something to live for, that made all the pain and suffering worth it. Sai couldn't care less about his lack in social skills for that was a minor concern. But emotions gave you power, strength, and bonds. Bonds like the connection that Sakura and Naruto (and presumably Sasuke) clearly shared.
The weirdest thing was that all this drama, heartache, and tragedy was effecting him. Oddly enough he was envious of the bond that Sakura and Naruto shared. He was curious of what attribute Sasuke possessed that he lacked. Sasuke had been a traitor, a bad person, and an enemy to the leaf village. Sai was nothing but a emotionless weapon. Theoretically, Sakura and Naruto should detest Sasuke and feel nothing towards Sai. But for some unexplainable reason, Sakura and Naruto adored Sasuke and disliked him.
Despite that, the two actually wanted to help him. Well, alright, Sakura wanted to help him. Naruto merely put up with him…and even that was only some of the time. Obviously, Sai's social skills were still lacking according to the amount of times Sakura and Naruto had become angry with him. Well, it wasn't as though they were great with social skills either. But even at times Naruto tried to help him, despite his misgivings. He'd eventually realized that Sai wasn't meaning any harm but was only really 'weird'. He still didn't accept Sai as a team-mate, but he had stopped being so hostile towards him.
But Sakura had seemed to take it upon herself to try to "fix him". Little remained of the young boy Sai had once been and what emotions had not managed to fade away, Sai did all that was in his power to terminate. Not that much remained, that is. But even the smallest trace of an identity or individual thought was simply unacceptable for a weapon like himself. Sai knew that if he could only get rid of that book he had written for his 'brother' then he would be able to finally leave his past behind him. But to do so would just be wrong. It was the one thing that reminded Sai that he was a real person and not some disposable tool. If he were to cast that book away it would be as though he were casting away the memory of his brother and that was not an option.
In all honesty, none of these thoughts had ever even occurred to him before. Maybe he had thought of it as a distant thought perhaps, but nothing more then that. But Sakura and Naruto were special that way. They changed people in ways that they could not even comprehend.
As he turned to look at his comrades he was surprise to notice that Sakura was staring at him. It wasn't a judging stare, it was more of a thoughtful dreamy expression. Sai had no idea what he was supposed to do in this kind of a situation. She seemed to be daydreaming…
"If you keep staring at me like that, I will be forced to pinch you, Sakura-San." Sai stated, smiling. After all, smiling was the best option in any social situation.
"Oh, I'm sorry!" Sakura apologized, blushing. Sai knew that blushing was a sign of embarrassment, but what was there to be embarrassed of? "Pinch me?" She added.
"Yes. Isn't that what someone is supposed to do when someone else is dreaming?" Sai asked, wondering why Sakura was giving her a look of confusion. The instruction was very clear, after all. If he were to catch another person dreaming, then he must pinch them.
"Yeah, sure." Sakura sighed, alerting Sai by her tone that she was not meaning what she was saying. Sarcasm, was the word for it.
" I wonder what you were daydreaming about, Sakura?" Naruto smirked. "I hope it's not a teammate." Sai turned to Naruto in confusion. What team-mate was he referring to? If it was Sasuke, then that would be very uncharacteristic of him. Besides, whenever Sasuke was brought up the two ninja usually became silent and serious. To make a joke about him wouldn't make any sense at all. If he was referring to himself that would make more sense, but referring to himself as a "certain team-mate" sounded a bit off. However, if he was referring to Sai himself…
"Why? You weren't hoping it was you, were you?" Naruto was quiet at that remark and Sai took that moment to observe how smooth the remarks between them had seemed to flow. It was because of that bond, it connected them in a way. Their conversation didn't even require everything to be said out loud, they were so accustomed to reading the others body language and understanding their implication without even having to speak it. It was like he had been with his 'brother'.
"Hey, you three! Hurry up, we're almost there!" Yamato called from ahead. Sai obeyed the command and quickened his pace. Oddly enough he felt excited. This journey was proving to be more interesting then he'd ever expected. And even if everything he'd ever learned and worked for was slowly deteriorating…it was completely worth it.
Ending Note: So…yeah. Please tell me if I made any mistakes and what you thought! I hope I got into Sai's head in a believable way!
