Forever Yours

CHAPTER TWO - DREAMS

Cordelia trudged slowly from the bathroom door to her queen-sized bed, rubbing her still-throbbing temples. Was it just her, or have the visions been getting a little too severe lately? The aftermath headaches were becoming more and more painful and long-lasting, that's for sure. Not that complaining about it would do any good. A whimper out of her would only make Angel go all concerned and protective, and he had enough worries in his mind already.

A smile played at the corners of Cordelia's mouth as she sat herself on the edge of the soft mattress. Still, she couldn't deny how much she secretly enjoyed having the vampire fuss over her whenever she'd get her visions The tingling sensation that raced though her body at Angel's cozy, soothing embrace almost made the agony worth it.

As she stretched herself out on the bed getting ready to sack out for the night, the bedroom door opened and in floated a glass of water and two Tylenol pills. Cordelia smiled and held out her hands to accept the items that stopped moving in front of her.

"Thanks, Dennis." she told her phantom roommate gratefully as she downed the painkillers in one gulp.

She felt an invisible hand pat her hair affectionately. A sheaf of papers and a pen levitated from the desk across the room. Cordelia waited as Dennis scribbled down a few words and then held one paper in front of her face.

"How did the date go?"

Cordelia groaned and shook her head, leaning back against the headboard of the bed. "Don't even ask."

Dennis waved the paper around, indicating he wanted details.

"Well, Angel crashed it and broke Nick's hand, which is why the night ended earlier than expected. It's a new record, in fact" Cordelia said bitterly.

Another paper was held up. "Isn't that what you wanted?"

"Yeah. I guess it was." She paused. "Is that supposed to make me happy? I mean, just because he wrecked my date doesn't automatically mean he cares about me."

"I think he was jealous." Was Dennis' prompt reply.

A twinge of hope sparked in Cordelia at that thought. "You think?" she murmured wistfully. She considered this for a brief moment before finally shaking her head. "Nah. He was probably just feeling all macho restless and was aching to pound the crap out of someone."

"You give yourself way too little credit." Dennis scolded in bold letters.

The girl sighed and shook her head sadly. "I just don't want to get hurt anymore, Dennis. I was able to recover from what happened with Xander, but this is different. I don't think I can take the rejection from Angel. I'll just die.I love him so much."

There was a long pause before the next note was written. "I think he loves you too, Cordy. I really do."

Cordelia bit her lip and shook her head. "Dennis, please don't." she murmured. "I'd rather not give myself false hopes. Less expectations, less disappointment."

She reached out and placed her hand on the pen floating in front of her. "Let's just not talk about it anymore, okay? I'm really tired." she said softly.

As the pen and paper drifted away, Cordelia pulled back the bed covers and sank underneath the warm blankets, resting her weary head against the soft pillows. She sensed the blankets being tucked in gently around her before the lights were switched off.

Cordelia smiled as she closed her eyes, feeling somewhat comforted by the thoughtfulness of her ghostly friend. A few minutes later, she had drifted off into a deep sleep.

* * *

Angel's footsteps were heavy but enigmatically soundless as he plodded tiredly down the hallway leading to Cordelia's apartment. His body felt numb and sore in about a dozen places from the intense fight he just went through. Was he getting rusty or what? Maybe this whole Daddy thing was making him too soft. Or maybe he underestimated that gang of teenaged vamps.

Or maybe he had just gotten distracted.

It was funny-no, weird was the right word-how he couldn't stop thinking about Cordelia lately. Sure, she was his seer and his best friend and he was fonder of her than of any other person in the world, but that didn't quite explain why he kept on dreaming about her day and night. Or why he would get this fuzzy feeling in his chest whenever she smiled or whenever they touched. It certainly didn't explain why he went nuts with anger at seeing her with another guy just awhile ago.

Hey. Could it be that-- ?

He shook his head. Nah. Too weird. Couldn't be.

"Jeez, I am tired." the vampire thought, shrugging. "I can't even think straight anymore."

At last he was standing outside Cordelia's door. He raised a fist and tapped it gently against the wood, careful not to knock too loudly in case the seer's after-vision headache was still bothering her. He had to wait for a full minute before the door finally swung open. There was nobody standing at the doorway.

"Hey, Dennis." Angel greeted the air in front of him, stepping inside. "Is Cordy still up?"

The drawer to a nearby side table opened up and a pad and paper flew out. A note was scribbled and handed over to Angel.

"She just fell asleep. Really bad headache."

"Oh." Angel said, disappointment and concern mixing in his voice. He had been hoping to talk to her for a while, even if just to apologize for what he did to ruin her date. That and, of course, to make sure she was okay. "Well, do you think I could just- you know- go in and check up on her?"

The bedroom door flew open even before Angel finished his sentence.

"Thanks, Dennis." Angel whispered, walking inside.

The vampire could see clearly even if there were no lights turned on in the dark room. He stood still near the entrance for a few moments, just watching the slender, breathing form lying peacefully on the bed before him. He took a couple of quiet steps closer, his feet drawn by some unknown force. He laid his eyes on her face-the way the moonlight shone upon it made her look even more like an angel. The softness of her white skin, the silkiness of the dark hair framing her face, the delicateness of her cute nose, the moistness of her sweet mouth--

Then he felt it again-that fuzzy feeling tickling his inner chest.

At the same time, Angel heard the bedroom door close behind him, and he knew that Dennis had left the room so he could be alone with Cordelia.

Angel hesitated. He had not meant to stay long. After all, what was the use of hanging around if he couldn't even talk to her? But now that he was standing there watching her sleep, seeing how sweet and peaceful she looked-

What the heck. It wasn't as if he was badly needed back at the hotel anyway. He'd rather be there than anywhere else as of that moment.

Still moving without sound, Angel pulled up a chair next to the bed and sat down. Then he proceeded to stare at his best friend's pretty face, unconsciously entranced by her loveliness. The toll that her earlier vision had taken on her was still apparent in the way her forehead creased and a slight frown remained at her lips. But these things all the more made her even more beautiful in Angel's eyes. They reminded him of how strong and brave she was.

Angel shook his head, sensing both sadness and anger in his heart. Poor Cordelia. Time and again he wished she could just give up her visions so she wouldn't have to suffer so much pain. But whenever he would even try to open up the subject with her, she would get all huffy and tell him to not even dare think about it. He knew she was afraid that if she lost her visions she would become useless to him. Like that would ever be possible!

Angel treasured Cordelia not because of the visions at all. He valued her precisely because she gave him moments like this one right now- moments when he felt complete peace and contentment. Moments that made him feel almost human.

Just then, Cordelia began to stir in her sleep. She tossed over restlessly to one side, facing Angel. It seemed as if she was having a dream-not a very good one. The vampire saw the crease on her forehead deepen and her lips move as she mumbled one word over and over.

"Angel. Angel."

On instinct, Angel reached out and took her hand. He wrapped both his hands around it and squeezed gently. The warm touch of his fingers seemed to comfort the sleeping girl. Her mumbling stopped and her body became still once more. However, her frown and knitted brow remained. It was obvious that there were disturbing thoughts haunting her in her sleep.

Angel frowned, watching her face closely with concern as he kept a firm yet tender grip on her hand. What could she be dreaming about?

* * *

Cordelia shivered and pulled her leather jacket closer around her as she walked down the dimly lit downtown alleyway. It was a dark and cold night, the sort of setting ideal for horror movies.

Jeez, the girl thought, wanting to kick herself. Why did I have to realize that?

She hastened her steps, wanting to get out of that dark, dank, creepy place as quickly as possible. But where was she even going?

Suddenly, she caught sight of a tall dark figure of a man standing up ahead with his back facing her. Cordelia didn't know how, but instantly she was able to ascertain that man was Angel. She just knew it. Relief filled her insides. As long as Angel was there, then she was sure of her safety. He was her Champion. Even any hell hole can be a safe place for as long as they were together.

"Okay, that's very mushy Cor." she mumbled to herself. "Now move your ass and just get to him!"

She broke into a run, going as fast as her three inch heels could let her. "Angel. Angel!" she called out, waving her hand at the same time was she tried to catch his attention.

At the sound of her voice, the man turned around slowly. The face of Cordelia's beloved Champion was illuminated in the faint street lights. His soulful brown eyes held onto hers, making her heart skip and a smile brighten up her face.

But then something terribly wrong happened.

Angel turned back around and ran down the alley AWAY FROM HER.

"Angel!" Cordelia cried out, alarmed and extremely confused. He never even paused. Within a heartbeat he was gone from her sight and Cordelia found herself all alone.

For a full minute the girl could only stand and stare at the inky darkness, frozen with disbelief at what had just happened. Angel left her. He abandoned her right when she needed him!

Just then footsteps sounded behind her, taking her mind off her initial shock and the ache that was starting to gnaw at her chest. Sinister laughter rang from the shadows. Cordelia felt warm, icky breath on the back of her neck and smelled a dizzying stench in the air.

Gasping with fear and panic, the girl tried to run away. She barely took two steps when suddenly several pairs of arms seized her and pulled her back harshly. She struggled as hard as she could, but instead of helping it only hurt her more. Tear began to stream down her face as she realized her helplessness. There was more laughter that grew louder and more menacing, the noise rising till it became deafening to her ears.

"NO!!!" Cordelia's screams shattered the deathly silence of the night.

* * *

"NO!!!"

Angel seized Cordelia's arms as she bolted upright, restraining her before she could fling herself off the bed. She continued screaming and struggling, her eyes still closed as if still caught up in her nightmare.

"Cordy. Cordelia!" Angel shouted, holding onto her firmly and shaking her. "Wake up!"

His voice was like cold water that drove her back to reality and consciousness. With a choking gasp she was awake, her eyes wide and staring all around her. Angel had never seen so much fear on her face before, and it almost frightened him.

"Cordy, it's okay." Angel told her, transferring his gentle hands to the sides of her face. "I'm here." He stoked her soft cheeks with his thumbs. "You're safe."

As soon as Cordelia's eyes focused on his face, her tensed body relaxed and she ceased struggling altogether. The tears that had been welling at the corners of her eyes spilled over, streaking her supple cheeks.

"Angel." she managed to whisper, before she broke down in sobs.

Angel immediately enveloped her in his arms and pulled her shaking body against him, his hands patting her back. Cordelia's head immediately found its place to nestle on his shoulder.

"Shhh.it's all right." Angel murmured into her ear. "It's over. Don't cry, please. Don't cry."

For a few minutes, Cordelia's sobs were the only sounds heard in the room as Angel waited patiently for the girl to completely calm herself. When her tears finally died down, Angel drew away from her slightly so he could look at her face to face.

"What is it?" he asked worriedly, his eyes probing her face. "What were you dreaming about?"

But the girl kept her head down, refusing to utter a sound or even glance his way.

A sharp pang struck Angel's insides. This was so unlike Cordelia. Usually nothing could scare her or break her plucky spirit.

"Cordy," Angel placed his hand beneath her chin and tried to get her to face him.

She resisted, jerking her head away. Angel spotted yet another tear slip down her cheek.

"Cordy, I just want to know what's wrong." Angel begged.

"It's nothing." Was the faint response.

"Don't lie to me, Cordy." Angel said sharply. "You know I can't take that."

There was more stubborn silence.

Angel sighed and took her hand, massaging it with gentle fingers. "Cordelia, please. Something's got you freaked out. I can see it and I can feel it. Tell me, and I'll help you make it better."

At long last, Cordelia lifted her teary gaze to meet his. Strength seemed to return to her gaze as she spoke.

"It was a nightmare, Angel. Nothing more." she answered softly. "Like you said, it's over now."

Angel's eyes searched hers. There was something she wasn't telling her-it was so obvious. She was trying to cover up her fears by putting up a brave front, but he knew her too well.

"But, what--?" Angel began, but Cordelia held up a hand to his lips, silencing him before he could continue his question.

"If you really want to help make it better, please don't make me talk about it." she told him firmly. She seemed to have regained herself completely, and was once again the tough girl familiar to Angel. There was no way he would be able to force anything out of her now. Then again, maybe that dream wasn't such a big deal after all, and was just a run of the mill nightmare. Maybe he was just being paranoid.

He sighed and nodded. Upon seeing him relent, Cordelia forced a weak smile and sank back down on the bed.

"What are you doing here anyway?" she asked. "It's really embarrassing having you watch me flip out over some stupid dream."

Angel smiled back and sat on the edge of the bed so he could be closer to her. "I just wanted to check up on you-see if you were all right." he explained.

He reached over and brushed his hand over her hair and across her forehead. "How's the Vision Machine? Still hurting?"

Cordelia shrugged. "Yeah, a little. But it's nothing out of the usual." she assured him. She tilted her head to one side. "What about you? How did the fight go? Are the girls safe?"

Angel nodded. "I got there just in time. Those punk kids put up quite a fight at first, but eventually I was able to dust 'em all. The girls are fine-a little shaken up, but they'll recover."

Cordelia's gaze scrutinized him, darting up and down Angel's body. "You weren't hurt, were you?" she asked with both concern and suspicion in her voice.

Angel shook his head. "Nah. Just the usual bumps and scrapes."

Cordelia's hand flashed out and went for the vampire's leg. Angel cried out in surprise and slight pain as she pressed against the sore muscle just above his knee where one of his opponents had caught him with a fierce kick.

The girl scowled and sat back up. "Liar."

Before Angel could stop her, Cordelia rose from bed and headed for the bathroom where he knew she kept her first aid kit.

"Cordy, you know that really isn't necessary." he called out. "I'm fine-in fact, most of these injuries are almost completely gone now."

"Sez you!" Cordelia snapped back. "You're not as invincible as you like to think, Mr. Macho Man!"

Angel smiled at her as she came back out with a large black bag and began producing various ointments and bandages. "Hey, what good is my having self-healing powers if you won't even let me make use of them?" he chided.

"The very least I could do is clean up the blood and cover up the wound." Cordelia retorted as she examined his hands, which were badly bruised at the knuckles. "I don't care how proud you men are about your battle scars-they just freak me out."

Angel shifted uncomfortably in his seat as Cordelia busied herself treating his cuts and scratches.

"Uhm, Cordy, there's one more thing." he began uneasily, unsure of how she would react to the topic. "I-I'm sorry for what I did. I'm sorry I ruined your date for you."

Angel watched her face closely as she continued to apply medicine on one particularly nasty looking gash on his wrist. For a moment it seemed as if she couldn't think of what to say.

"I'm sorry too, Angel." she finally murmured, carefully avoiding his gaze. "It was wrong of me to try to keep it a secret from you. I guess I would have reacted the same way if you had done that to me."

Angel nodded. After what had happened between him and Darla, the two of them had agreed as best friends never to keep secrets from each other again. Cordelia had broken that promise, but still-

"But that was still no excuse for me to act the way I did." Angel went on. "You didn't deserve to have your night ruined."

Cordelia sighed. "Honestly Angel? It was ruined even before you got there anyway." she mumbled.

Angel's brow creased. "What do you mean?"

Cordelia lifted her eyes to meet his gaze. "Let's just say Nick didn't turn out to be what I'm looking for." she replied with a bitter smile.

Immediately Angel took her hand and squeezed it. "You'll find him someday, Cor. Someday the right one will come along." he told her consolingly. "You're the most wonderful, most beautiful person I know, and any guy who can't see that is just, well, a hopeless moron. It's his loss."

The girl's eyes brightened as she smiled at him "Thanks, Angel."

There was an awkward pause before Angel gathered up the guts to ask his next question.

"Cordelia? Have I been a good friend to you?" he mumbled, looking down at his feet.

Taken aback by these words, Cordelia stopped what she was doing to stare at him. "God, of course you have Angel!" she exclaimed. "What could have possibly made you think otherwise?"

Angel shrugged, still too shame-faced to look up. "Well. Nick said you were complaining about me. He told me you said I'm a bother and that you don't even like me."

Angel finally raised his eyes, hurt radiating from his face. "He said I worry you."

Cordelia rolled her eyes and smiled. "Well you do don't you?" she scolded. "God, Angel! If only you knew how sick with worry I get whenever I send you out to fight some big scary demon. But it's your job, so how can I possibly blame you for that?"

She pressed her palm gently against his. "You do make me worry, but it's only because I care so much about you. I love you."

At those words, something flared up in Angel and skyrocketed around his entire being. Did she just say she--?

Cordelia placed her slender arms around his neck and hugged him affectionately. "You're my best friend."

Oh. The fireworks instantly went pfft.

Just as a friend.

Angel smiled and hugged her in return, kissing the top of her head

"I love you too, Cordy." he mumbled against her sweet-smelling hair, realizing he meant the sentence with every inch of him though this was the first time he ever said it.

Cordelia laughed and pulled away, punching his arm lightly.

"Okay, enough with the dramatics." she teased. "Now, off with the jacket. And the shirt."

Angel's eyes nearly fell out of his head. "Wh-aat?"

"So I can work on your chest wounds, you dork!" Cordelia snapped. "Sheesh, what did you think I meant?"

Angel hesitated. This was exactly what he was hoping wouldn't happen. He didn't think it was a very good idea for Cordelia to see what he was hiding under his shirt. However, the determination in her commanding stare told him she was not going to back down till she got what she wanted, so---

Slowly and carefully Angel slid out of his leather jacket. Then, he peeled off his ripped, blood-soaked, black shirt, wincing with pain as he did so. He heard Cordelia gasp.

"It's not as bad as it looks, really." Angel said lightly, trying to reassure her by acting nonchalant.

Cordelia's shaking fingers traced the torn flesh outlining the deep, bloody puncture wound on his left chest. The vampire gritted his teeth to keep from crying out. The wound was caused by a sharp metal pole one of the punk vampires had very nearly finished him of with. Luckily, the kid's aim had not been good enough, so Angel was able to escape still in one piece.

"Angel," she whispered in horror. "This is just inches away from your heart!"

"I've had closer ones." Angel said bravely.

"You could have died!" Cordelia shrieked, her eyes wide with fright. "Angel."

Sensing that she was about to burst into tears any second, Angel cupped her face in his hands.

"But I didn't, Cordelia. I'm still here, see?" he told her firmly.

"Oh God, Angel." Cordelia gasped out, beginning to hyperventilate. Tears were quickly welling around her eyes. "If something had happened to you.oh, God!"

Angel slid an arm around her waist and pulled her close till her body was pressed against his. His nearness and the feeling of his skin against hers seemed to convince the girl that he was all right, that he wasn't about to go anywhere. Somewhat relaxed now, she snuggled closer to him, leaning her forehead at the curve of his neck. Angel dropped a kiss on her cheek.

"I won't let anything happen to me, Cordy." he promised her. "I know-- I know it would hurt you too much. And I would never, never do anything that can hurt you."

"Don't you dare do anything like this again, you big jerk." she muttered against his shoulder. "Or else I'll kill you myself."

Angel laughed softly. "Fair deal." he agreed, as the girl brought out her biggest bandage roll to wrap his chest wound with.

* * *

There was something wrong with that night. It was too dark, too cold, and too-quiet.

Angel's brows knitted together as he observed his surroundings. He was standing in what appeared to be an alley somewhere in downtown LA. If it weren't for his heightened senses, it would be impossible for him to see anything. However, as far as his keen eyesight could tell him, he was alone.

The vampire frowned as he began to move forward slowly but cautiously. His senses were telling him that there was no one around, but a strong gut feeling was urging him to stay alert-something was definitely not right in this picture.

For one thing, he didn't have a goddamn clue of what he was doing there and why.

Rule number one in his night-walking book: If you find yourself lost in an unfamiliar place, do whatever you can to just get the hell out of there. Which was exactly what he needed and planned to do at that moment.

Covering two meters with every long and quick stride, the vampire hurried further down the street. As he went he gazed at the walls of buildings looming about him, trying to spot some sign-any sign-that could at least give him even a slight clue of where he was.

Just then, the vampire overheard a sound. It was muffled, and seemed to be coming from far off, so he was not able to determine exactly what it was. Angel stopped in his tracks and instead strained his ears to hear more. The noise came again, clearer and louder this time. It sounded like a scuffle.

Suddenly, there was a deafening scream. An ear-piercing, blood- curdling scream that caused every inch of Angel's body froze in horror. He knew that voice.

Cordelia.

"Angel!" Cordelia cried out from the darkness, sounding terrified out of her wits. "ANGEL!"

Angel felt as if his insides were going to burst as he whirled around, desperately trying to pinpoint the source of the screams. He could see nothing but darkness. He could not find Cordelia. He tried to run, but it got him no where. All he found was more darkness.

The screams went on, growing louder and louder each second. Angel heard pain, fear, vulnerability. Someone was hurting Cordelia, and there was no one to save her. He couldn't save her.

"CORDELIA!!!" Angel shouted frantically, his cry causing the walls around him to shudder.

The screams stopped abruptly. There was total silence in the surroundings once more.

Angel stood still in place, paralyzed with shock.

No. God, please no.

The vampire's furious roar split the stillness of the night, echoing like thunder off the walls.

* * *

Angel's eyes shot open as he awoke with a gasp. The air was knocked out of him so violently that it felt like he had just been sucker-punched in the gut. Cold sweat was pouring down the sides of his face.

He stared up at the ceiling. It took him a moment to realize, to his relief., that he was back in Cordelia's bedroom.

It was just a dream. A horrible one, but just a dream.

Cordelia. Where was Cordelia?!

He heard a soft sigh come from beside him. The vampire looked to his right and found a sleeping girl nestled at the curve of his arm, cuddled up comfortably with her head laying peacefully at his shoulder. He felt his entire body relax as he remembered what had really happened that night.

After Cordelia had finished dressing all of his wounds, the two of them had stayed up until midnight just talking. Eventually, the weary girl fell asleep curled up against him. She looked so peaceful that Angel didn't have the heart to move or disturb her. Not that he minded having her warm body cuddled up against his all night. He just never intended to fall asleep himself so unexpectedly.

And that dream. Never in his life had Angel dreamt about anything that left him so drained, angry, and terrified before. What was that all about? What could it have meant?

Angel's gaze fell on the beautiful young woman snuggled at his side, and a tremendous wave of affection and protectiveness washed over him, filling his heart with iron resolution.

He had no idea what the answers to those questions were, but that didn't really matter. He would sooner die before he would let anything bad happen to Cordelia, and he knew it. He would never let anything harm her for as long as he was around.

Feeling somewhat comforted by that silent vow, the vampire laid back and closed his eyes. A few minutes later he was sound asleep once again, with his precious seer still resting safely at his side.

* * *

COMING UP.Chapter 3 - Birthday