This story was supposed to be an OS, but some ideas came to my mind, enough to write a sequel with sense. I'm sorry about the lack of action in this chapter. But I do think it's important to stay focus on Spencer's thoughts. And I wanted my story with A- in it, so, here she comes !
Again, sorry for my bad english. If you see any mistake in the text, please let me know in reviews. Thanks.
Bonne lecture à tous !
Ps : Spencer's alarm song is "Bohemian Rhapsody", by Queen. Listen Queen. Especially this song. It's awesome.
« Is this the real life ? Is this just fantasy ? Caught in a landside, no escape from reality Open your eyes, look up to the sk ...»
I grab my phone, turn of the alarm ring, and close my eyes. But too late, I can't fall asleep again now.
Damn you Queen, damn you ! I've never hated Freddie Mercury so much in my life. Why did I choose this song to wake me up in the first place? God, why didn't I turned off my alarm yesterday … I'm so tired. If I just could stay at home for the entire day, and sleep. I've got field hockey practice after class. I don't wanna go, I don't wanna see him. And I can't lie to him. I have to go anyway.
Get up, Spence, here is an another beautiful day's waiting for you. I notice the ache in my arms and crotch when I get up of my bed. Apparently yesterday night was a little bit rough that what I thought. And, indeed, I'm bleeding. It happens more and more often. I should see a doctor. But obviously I can't. I take a pill against pain, and spend more time than necessary under the shower. God it feels good. The pain is still here, but at least I'm a little less dirty than before. Choosing a cute pleated dress is not an option for me anymore. Not with the bruises all over my body. A jean, and a blue sleeved shirt, and here I am, ready for another day.
As I reach the stairs I take a deep breath. I plate an artificial smile in my face, and walk to the kitchen.
Everybody's here. Mom on the phone, Dad drinking coffee, Melissa and his big belly -six month, already- eating some chocolate muffins. And him, of course. Drinking a glass of milk, and starring at me as I open the fridge, looking for something to take away. Hurry up, hurry up, Spence, you could be at school without him glaring at you like a predator. Why does everyone act like nothing happened ? Why does nobody notices this sick glare ?
« Hi Champ. Come on, take something with us ! » Thanks Dad. Now I have to stay. I can't say no. I can't say yes. I want to run away from him.
« Uh, I, I have to go to school Dad, the girls are waiting for me and ... »
« Come on, Spencer, it's been a while since our last breakfast, especially with our two daughters. Sit down, and eat something with your family. First class start at 9:00 right ? You've got fifteen minutes to share with us, without being late. »
« Yeah Spence ! Come on, eat something, you don't want to be weak at the practice right ? Besides, we haven't seen you for ages » God. You asshole, hypocrite bastard. Ian told that, and everyone is now looking at him with thankful eyes. Of course. He is the nice one after all, right Dad ? He's the only one that Spencer the rebel teenager seems to listen. Why can't you guess why, Dad ?
But, the point is, I can't sit here Dad. I can't sit near to him. Dad, this man is hurting me, almost every night. Don't you see how he look at my right now ?I can't even dress myself like I want anymore Dad, I have to think about the bruises, the scratches, the bites, the hickeys all over my body, and I can't wear dresses or backless shirts anymore, I have to wear pants and sweat shirts every day, and all of this because of Him ... He took everything from me Dad, literally, and he's killing me slowly, every time he's touching me, every time he's glaring at me, every time he speaks to me, even every time he thinks about me. Why can't you see that Dad ? Why can't you see that I lost almost 15 pounds ?I can barely eat, because I'm too terrified by what is waiting for me every night, Dad. I can't handle this anymore. You have to do something. I need help Dad. Help me. Please, help me …
But, of course, I can't say it. And if I do, who are they gonna believe ? Me, the liar problematic daughter, unstable, obsessive and totally crazy ? Or Ian, the husband of Melissa the perfect daughter, future perfect dad of the perfect grand-child ever ? All I can do is smile at my dad, breathe hard, contain a massive need to burst into tears in his arms, and sat down at the table, as far away as I can from Ian, who's now reading the news in the Philadelphia Inquirer. Maybe he's not gonna talk to me today. I can ignore him, drink something like a big cup of coffee, and go away. Yes, I can do that.
So I did, and five minutes later I'm on the way to school. Hanna and Em are on our favorite table, at the cafeteria, and Aria is sitting right next to them. She sees me, and tell me to come. Great. I feel good, for the first time this day. I'm glad to see my all of my friends of course, but Aria … It's different. The last time we shared Sparia time together seems to be an eternity. But I can't see her alone now. It's not safe. I want to. But I can't. At least I can see her at school. It's better than nothing.
I have to act normal. Thanks to A-, I'm very good at hiding my problems to other peoples. All I have to do is lying at my friends, ignore the pain in my stomach as I walk to them, smile, and listening Hanna's stories about make up or clothes or Caleb or whatever. I can do that.
But I see Aria's face, anxious and worried. Oh my god. What happened ? Is she hurt ? Did he hurt her ? Calm down. Everything's not about him, or you. She doesn't know. There is no way she can know something. I can't breathe, I need to know, but I can't act like a fool in front of everyone. I have to act normal. Even if it's killing me.
« Hey, what's going on ? Aria, is everything alright?»
« A-. She text me.»
Oh crap. Why Aria, first of all? And, mainly, why today ?After all the Ian's stuff started I received some texts and mails from A-, asking me to find out what does my sister did the night Ali's death. Nothing about him. I guess that even A- can't know everything … Anyway, I ignored the texts, despite all the warnings, more and more threatening, saying that Melissa or my family would be hurted if I didn't obey. Compared to Ian, A-'s threats was nothing. I was scared by the aftermath of this ignorance, but, strangely, nothing happened. And I mean, literally nothing. No texts, no mails anymore. I asked the girls, and, most surprisingly, they didn't receive anything either. As if A- had decided to leave us alone. And now, few months after, she start again. Oh god why.
When I take Aria's phone, I feel his soft hand on mine, and when I take the phone she put his hand on my arm, firmly. She's smiling at me. Apparently I've missed her too. And if she's smile at me she's fine. I feel relieved. Then I read the text.
« Aria, Aria, Aria. You're supposed to be the best liars of the crew. How can't you see anything ? Maybe Jenna's not the only one to being blind … Watch your friends. Especially one of them. Or someone might get hurt. A- ».
"Um, What, what does she means ?"
"Dunno. But i'm officially scared. It's been, like, four month that she stopped sending us texts ? Why now ? I mean, its not like one of them had something new to share, and -"
"Oh come on Aria, she's doing this for keeping us in his power ! We don't need her. We need to figure what happens to Ali. And we don't need this psycho behind our back. Erase the text, don't pay attention to it. Is she ask you to do anything ? No. Is she blackmailing you with some secret stuff ? No. So why do you care so much ? Everyone's fine here, right ?"
Thanks Hanna for being so pragmatic. I don't want Aria worried.
All of us nodded at Hanna's speech. She sure know how to comfort his friends. I smile to Aria, I don't want her to be upset by that. But i'm dying inside. Is A- know ? Is she talking about me .. ? How could she know ? And if it's about me, she's … protecting me ? Helping me ?Anyway. Aria has nothing to do in this story. If she figure out what's happening with me, she'll be the threatened one. It's not good. I'm the one who keep her safe. And she's not gonna start snooping because of a stupid text.
The girls keep talking until the bell rings, but honestly I barely listen at them. All I do is nod, say "uh uh" with an interrested face, but all I can do is thinking. How to keep Aria's mind focus on another thing that this bloody text ? How ? But, as usual, nothing good enough come to my mind.
