1. Aponoia


Oizys walked through the darkening wood. She wasn't sure what she sought until she felt it: the greens were suddenly richer, the cool breeze sweeter – she had left the realm of men. She found her lying by a stream, droplets turning to fireflies at her touch. The satyr played softly on silver pipes.

The playing stopped. "Mortals wonder too freely into Arkadia, Lady Hedone."

Delight looked up and smiled. That smile. "How could I ever turn away those eyes, Dionysus?"

The god examined her dark curls and stocky figure. "They do say Eros is blind." He shrugged and returned to his pipe.

Oizys sat beside her, skin a-tingle. "The naming ceremony was beautiful. Your family can be quite…"

"Scary?" offered Dionysus.

"Well, yes."

Delight giggled. "They can be very self-important sometimes. But I think they get scared too, even if they don't show it."

"But they are important, Hedone," said Oizys. "You are important. It made me realize how selfish I was to want you for myself. You have a purpose. If this is all of you I can have, it is still so much more than I ever..."

Delight kissed away her tears. "I came to a realization of my own. Seeing them all there, walking the mortal realm like gods…"

"More than gods," added Dionysus.

"I've been thinking it is time I left this place, this role, and took care of my own delight." She smiled at Oizys.

Dionysus missed a note. "What of your… responsibilities?"

"Oh, there will still be delight in the world, old friend. But that will be mortals' own affair. Things are changing. They worship logos and shun ecstasy. I will not be a part of it."

"The decadent fad of a decadent civilization. They too will crumble to dust and be forgotten."

"As will their gods?"

Dionysus smiled. "Not even gods live forever. Perhaps that is what makes it all bearable."

"A luxury denied my kind."

The god relented. "It will be like extinguishing the sun in this place; and in our hearts." He stood. "I beg your leave, for I must drown my sorrow."

"Lacking sorrow you would surely be drowning your joy."

"Quite possible." He flashed a grin before trotting away.

"When?" asked Oizys.

Delight wet her hand in the stream and drew a circle round Oizys' finger. The drops coalesced into a ring of cool silver. "Why not now?"

Fireflies lit the way to a grove Oizys had never noticed before. She followed in silence.

They came to a clearing with an intricately carved marble sundial, its pointer dancing in the fire-flight. The surrounding trees held seven frames with unusual contents: book, ankh, helm, sword, heart, spiral and a flower that called to her. Delight stopped by the spiral.

"Sister, I stand in my gallery and hold your sigil. May we come in?"

Oizys suddenly felt cold.

"We?" asked the voice beyond the frame.

"I promise to be brief," Delight said in her sweetest voice.

"If you must."

Oizys grabbed her hand as fog poured from the spiral. She thought she saw her mother's silhouette, but that couldn't possibly be her and she would never know how sorry her daughter was but it was too late for apologies and…

Delight squeezed her hand. Holding on to her warmth, Oizys noticed they had left the grove behind. She shuddered as fur slithered over her foot, but couldn't see the ground beneath the fog – perhaps it was for the best.

Before them sat the woman Oizys had seen at the ceremony, dark spirals crossing her red, bloated body, looking into one of many mirrors that hung around them. A man stared at a golden clothes pin, a woman's lifeless body behind him.

"Oedipus, son of Laius," said Despair. "Unknowingly killed his father and caused his mother to kill herself. Our eldest brother can be quite cruel sometimes." She turned around. "Maybe it runs in the family."

"I'm not doing this to be cruel," said Delight, "I need to do this for me."

"And you're going around telling each of us it's not about us?"

"No, just you. I think it will be easier on the others. We are so close – Despair and Delight, Delight and Despair, and what else is there, really? I will miss you, dear sister."

Delight planted a kiss on Despair's lips and then they were gone. Oizys heard a deep wail behind her, but couldn't be sure whether it came from the mirror.

The warm grass felt good against Oizys' feet, but her heart was troubled. "How can anyone love Aponoia, Hedone? The anguish in those mirrors…"

"Sometimes self-inflicted, and all the more painful for it," said Delight. "Other times inflicted by others, or by fate – because life isn't fair. Everything follows the laws of Destiny, but only living things Die. Beasts may Dream, Destroy and Desire. But only sentient creatures know Despair, and through it learn Delight. Do you understand what I am trying to tell you?"

Oizys nodded solemnly.