Life is But a Dream
He'd always told her what his darkest memory was, though she had always known his answer, and she had always been the first to have his back. Losing his brother had been the hardest thing he had ever experienced. They both knew this. But now, his thoughts on such a subject were beginning to change. What if that's not the thing that was hurting him the most anymore.
Regulus looked up and into the clear blue eyes of his best friend, and she looked back at him lazily, both of them obviously tired of studying. It seemed that she was no longer concentrated on their assignment. Concentration never seemed to be either of their strong suits, so they simply ended up spending most of their free time talking and enjoying each other's company. And she was a pleasant distraction, except for moments like this.
She was lost in her dreams, and he in his thoughts. And a deadly combo those two things were when put together. Thinking and losing himself in her eyes, was at times more than he could handle.
And it was times like these when Regulus began to doubt that the worst thing that could ever happen was Sirius's leaving him. The girl across from him, staring at him, almost blankly, her mind on other things, was the first to tell his brother off, the first to comfort him when he needed a shoulder to… well not cry on per say but one would get the picture. She was always there when he needed her, always what he needed her to be. This led to be a problem; Regulus couldn't help but think he was falling for Savannah.
Now, he wasn't saying that this was necessarily a bad thing; wait, who was he kidding? Of course it was a bad thing. They had tried it before, the whole going from best friends to dating hadn't worked to well three years back in third year, so why would now be any different? Why would she even want to give it another go? As far as Regulus could tell, she was quite content with being "just friends," no matter how much it tore him up on the inside.
This was hard to accept. Being a Black, he had never had issues with getting a girl, even if it was just for the occasional snog or a short fling, though he rarely exercised his influence. And now, the one girl he wanted was most certainly unattainable. But the real question would soon be, could he handle feeling this way for his best friend and manage not to let it change things?
His thoughts were interrupted as Savvy quickly jolted her head downwards, her cheeks flushed a tender pink color. Perhaps she had seen the passion in his eyes; no there was no passion. Regulus, no matter how feeble, continued to drill himself with the constant lies about Savannah being his best friend, that he couldn't start falling for her. It wasn't proper, and it would just give her false hope.
"Welcome back, Sav. For a minute there, I thought we'd lost you." Regulus teased her gently. "Where is it that that pretty mind of yours wanders to?" He smirked at her as she looked up defiantly. They flirted, joked, but it was all just an act, that's how comfortable they were with each other. Best friends worked that way, even in the Slytherin house, even if people thought them cold and heartless, incapable of such displays of emotion, incapable of such a capacity to care. Then again, the two of them had always known that they were different than the rest of their house mates, as they held such a low tolerance for them, held such a low level of respect for their dirty rotten tricks, thoughts, and most of all, the Dark Lord himself, though they were most careful not to let word spread around.
"Well, Reggie dearest, if you must know, I was dreaming of you." She winked playfully. But there was a devious curl of her lips and he knew there was more to come. Savannah never let him off the hook so easily. "If I do recall you were toddling around in diapers and sucking on your thumb, crying cause you couldn't find your mother. But don't worry, I was there to cheer you up."
Regulus couldn't help but chuckle, despite the playful mischief sparkling in his eyes. "I suppose 'tis better than that time you dreamt of snogging that Goyle bloke…" Savvy's eyes twinkled in a noticeable anger, before she closed them. Regulus knew better than to bring that up, her cheeks were flushed, from embarrassment or anger, which he wasn't sure. But either way, he knew he had gone a little farther than need be. But he'd done it all in good fun.
"You know that wasn't supposed to happen." She blushed. After a party, somehow Savvy really had wound up snogging the older boy, and she'd regretted it afterwards. "You are quite lucky I like you, sir. Or else I would have to send you on your way, painfully so." Savannah was not inclined towards violence, so they both knew she'd never lay a hand on him. But it added to the dynamic.
Regulus shook his head smiling at her. "Come now, Sav. We both know you love me anyway, so what does it matter if you kissed him?" He reached over and brushed her bangs from her face, laughing gently as he spoke. Loved him? Now that was a joke if ever he heard one. "I'll forgive you… this time."
Savannah brought her hand to cover her heart, a trick she often seemed to pull. "Oh, what would I do without you, Regulus?" She feigned relief, but there was a slight hint that something was off, though Regulus did his best to shrug it off and blame it on the late hour and the studying they had just been doing. He refused to let himself believe there was anything, more than friendship, between them.
But then Savvy reached out and gave him a playful shove in the chest, shifting him backwards slightly, but only for a moment before he leaned forward once more and regained his previous position.
"I believe that, without me, you would be quite lost Savannah, dear." Regulus smirked as he closed his book and set it down on the table between them. "But there is nothing to worry about. I'm not going anywhere." He leaned back and smiled snuggly as he sunk into the back of the small chair. And her warm smile made his grow, warming his heart. This was all too much. Regulus didn't like her, how could he? They had no chance together; they would both be married off to those who suited them best. But then again, they were both great candidates, their families liked each other… it could work.
What was he thinking? There was no way that he and Savvy could be together, they had done this before, tried things before that they'd only tried with each other. They trusted each other. But she didn't love him. And Regulus wasn't sure he could survive a relationship in which fondness and adoration were the only means to bind them. He needed someone to love him, not in a sisterly way, but romantically.
His thoughts consumed him, turning the idea of Savannah into mere object rather than three dimensional being. Regulus just found it hard to accept that he could be falling for her, and that they were doomed to fail. But what if she liked him? No, Regulus couldn't believe it. No matter how perfect they were for each other; they both hated the horrendous craze for the Dark Lord, neither of them wanted an arranged marriage, neither of them could stand the people in their house, the two faced, stubborn fools that they were. If that wasn't sign enough, he wasn't sure what was… But he couldn't allow himself to believe that they had any hope in being Regulus and Savvy, not just Regulus and Savannah the best friends.
"You know, Annabelle was on me again today about... us." Regulus blinked his eyes, only then realizing that Savannah had leaned closer to him, so that there were only a few inches between their faces, their eyes now locking on each other's. The last word was spoken hesitantly, for they both knew how much it shook their world of happiness. But this time, she seemed to be searching his eyes, for what he couldn't be sure. But what could she possibly be hoping to find?
"When will everyone just give up?" Regulus let out a heavy sigh. He was really beginning to wonder when they would actually give up and give in. He wondered if they would ever be "them" again. "How dense can they be? We're just friends." He spoke the last words more sternly than he'd planned to. But they didn't know how much harder their words and insinuations made his attempts to end this silly little crush.
Savvy shrugged as she sunk back into her own chair, a crooked smile crossing her lips. "They won't give up, Reg, not until they see that they're right." And they both knew those words were true. The only way that they'd ever get the others off of their backs was if they dated again, gave it another go. But did either of them really want that?
"But Sav, they're not right."
"Perhaps we could humor them." Savannah tilted her head to the side and let her red hair fall behind her shoulder. Was she really suggesting that they try dating again? His heart beat doubled in time, racing for reasons he wished to forget; the way she smiled, the way she laughed, the way that she cowered from violence, everything.
"I don't know, Sav…"
Regulus didn't know, he wasn't sure he wanted to know. She didn't know how much he wanted to taste her lips on his again, to hold her in his arms… But if she didn't feel the same way, if this was just an act to get the others to silent their thoughts of dating… Regulus couldn't afford that blow.
"Come on, Reg. Just one date, like before." Savannah had her hands on her knees and leant forward, her eyes dancing in the dim light of the fire. "For me?" She stuck her lower lip out and batted her eyelashes at him. He could feel a smug smirk cross his lips as he leaned closer from his spot on the chair, mimicking her position. There was a fraction of an inch between the two of them. Savannah knew that Regulus caved after a while, nobody could survive that look, not even him.
"You're cheating, Savvy, love." He tapped her on the nose with his pointer finger before letting his head fall to a rest upon hers. "You know I won't say no. But I hope you know what you're getting into, dearest." A smirk tread across his face, even if she couldn't see it, but she would still know it was there. She always knew.
"Ah, it's not cheating. I'm just taking my advantage, Reg." He could hear the laughter in her voice before she leaned back a little, just enough that their heads no longer touched and that she could find his eyes. Savannah would be the end of him, she would. "And I know what I'm getting into. I always do… with you."
"That's good, because we all know, I play by my own rules." He winked as he made to stand. Regulus was getting too hot and bothered to stay here any longer. He couldn't risk ruining things with Savannah, not after he'd tried so hard. With a reach for his book, her hand wrapped around his wrist, bringing his eyes to hers once more.
"You better be careful. Because, so do I." She smiled as she brushed the creases from her skirt and stood, turning to leave. "Don't forget, Hogsmeade tomorrow." Savannah smiled before winking and turning towards the girls' dormitories. Stopping at the door, she looked over her shoulder one last time and whispered to him. "Sweet dreams."
Oh, and he would have sweet dreams; Regulus just hoped he didn't wake the next morning to find it was all a dream.
A/N: More great thanks to Scarlett for letting me borrow Savannah from her, and I hope their relationship is a bit more defined than it was in the prologue. Reviews would be loved, good and bad.
