A/N: Not much to say about this chapter except that I hope more of you than I anticipated are reading it, since I'm very proud of it. I endeavored to focus more on the emotional aspect rather than "details" and I hope I succeeded.
So, without further ado, mild lemon warning!
Enjoy!
...
The wedding had been beautiful, but the look he was giving her now seemed like the very epitome of the entire two day's events. Her hand paused on the freezing metal of the gate keeping them from his apartment, the cold seeping into her skin and numbing it. Sakura paid it no mind, too enraptured by the warmth in his eyes that somehow blocked the frigid night from her consciousness.
This look was entirely familiar and alien all at once; a nearly disarming gentleness coupled with a burst of fire that set her on edge in a completely new way that she found not unpleasant in the slightest. She didn't know what to think at that moment… What to feel. So her body took the reins, sending her heart thudding and her stomach dropping to her knees in a foreign, but strangely welcome manner as she continued to stare, the two of them frozen in time.
The easy comfort she found in their relationship was changing rapidly before her eyes and she put a hand to her reddening cheek – from the frosty air or embarrassment, she couldn't be sure – in an unconscious effort to ward off the staggering realization.
Attempting to unravel and understand her own emotions in that moment seemed as daunting as when he'd first confessed. Sakura was never what one would call a coward, but still she shied away from the feelings that were cementing themselves in her mind. Thoughts she'd never had before. It felt befuddling at best, and at worst like she was doing something wrong, wondering if their bodies would fit the same way together without the hindrance of clothes. How she'd feel trapped beneath his powerful body, or what her name would feel like if he were to whisper it into her skin.
Still, the emotions fascinated her, and so she continued to stare back at him as he watched her gently. Were those things what she wanted? Were they ready to take that step? The thought was giant and looming, and she wondered if he could see what she was thinking, because his expression shifted slightly, becoming something enigmatic, though the gentleness remained.
In that moment she felt self-conscious; as see-through as glass, and just as easy to shatter, yet so embraced by love it nearly brought her to her knees. She felt a million miles away, yet he was connecting her to everything at the same time with just a look. A car drove by, the headlights playing against his face and lighting up his eyes, revealing emotions she couldn't see in the darkness. Love was prominent, followed by a mysterious longing she'd never seen grace his features before.
Suddenly he was closing the distance between them, so close to her that she swore her heart, already thudding heavily must have skipped a beat entirely. The erratic feelings from his proximity invoked a memory in her of the first time they'd shared a kiss; this scenario matching up with that time almost seamlessly, much to her continued wonder.
The scent of his clothes and skin reached her nose, lighting up her nerves with an electric current that she couldn't deny if she tried. And she realized with a jolt that if that were to instigate tonight, she wouldn't be the one to pull away and refuse.
The heat of his body suddenly made her drunk with want, and she started to raise a hand – to brush his bangs from his face or to steady herself for when he kissed her, she wasn't sure. Was he wondering the same things she was? The clicking of a latch broke her out of her stupor, followed by a stiff creaking. The gate groaned open beside her.
"We'll catch a cold if we stay out here. C'mon, Sakura."
Disappointment rang through her, clouding her thoughts with the opaque realizations of what she wanted from him. Then the mortification came. Did he know what she'd been expecting? Was he scared or disgusted if he did? Not to mention she'd been thinking of such things out here, in public!
'Hoeeeee!' her frantic mind thought, eloquently.
He was waiting for her to go in before him, she was sure, but his face looked strained and his smile wasn't right. She hesitated. Then the revelation coated her with the comfort of a blanket: it wasn't her he was hesitating about, it was this – these same heavy feelings she was struggling with. They were married now. This would be their first official night as husband and wife in their home. The realization had come slowly with their night in the hotel, not seeming real until that gate to their apartment had opened.
Perhaps the thoughts and emotions she'd had to claw through were just hitting him, now.
Their breath came out in frosty cobwebs, hovering in the air like sparkly clouds teasing and kissing each other with warmth. Sakura leaned up to press her lips chastely against Syaoran's; reassuring him and working him up simultaneously.
"Okay. Let's go inside, husband."
…
It wasn't like she'd never been to his apartment before, or even lain on his bed with him before. But somehow now it seemed different, now that it was their apartment; their bed. Still, it was late and they couldn't put off sleeping forever, and it would be even more awkward if one of them were to sleep on the couch. They were married now, after all, and she couldn't for the life of her figure out why that was so hard.
By some unspoken agreement, they decided the couch was a much more neutral place to start the night and an exhausted Syaoran flopped down on the sofa, holding his arm open in a silent invitation that she graciously accepted, snuggling under it and leaning her head into his shoulder. Just like that, the easy intimacy was back and they both relished in it, heaving dual sighs of relief.
Silence enveloped them, but it was thick with their unsaid thoughts from earlier. Even though they were comfortable with each other right now, it was obvious others expected them to take their relationship further, and Sakura still struggled with her own feelings on the matter. She felt she should say something; anything to break the silence and force herself out of these impenetrable musings.
He beat her to it.
"I'm sorry… I told you I'd have a bigger bed by now."
He sounded so frank; so sincerely apologetic about something so trivial that her tumultuous emotions faded in the wake of it and she couldn't stop the laughter. He looked slightly confused so she kissed his cheek to soothe him.
"Don't worry, Syaoran. I love you, no matter what size our bed is," she giggled teasingly.
He smiled brilliantly for her and turned his face the extra inch to capture her lips, running his fingertips over her cheek. She returned his affections, nibbling lightly at his bottom lip impulsively. He sucked in a sharp breath at the novel sensation before hesitantly, shyly twining his tongue with hers. They had only tried kissing like this a few times in the past, but it had never really led anywhere. Now it created a warm glow in their bellies; a stoking of passionate coals that flickered incessantly against their stomachs, growing stronger and stronger the longer their lips danced together and refusing to be ignored.
"Sakura…" he breathed, and the way he spoke her name; so full of raw emotion and shy past the obvious tightening in his throat, brought goose bumps to her skin. He nuzzled their noses together, before shifting to kiss across her cheek and down to her neck.
This part was new for both of them, never having tread into this territory, and even though it showed in the unconfidence with which he moved against her, she found the emotions swelling within her to be nothing but good ones. Sighing in bliss, she tilted her head to the side to encourage him, her nerves lighting up like a million fireflies when he nibbled gently; experimentally, and rubbed her shoulder with his thumb.
Suddenly she found she couldn't stop the emotions racing through her, now clear as daylight what she discovered herself wanting from this boy that held her heart in an iron grip.
"Syaoran…" It was all she could articulate in that moment; all she could think about, and he answered her unspoken call, responded by shifting to drag his tongue over her smooth skin on drunken impulse.
She moaned softly for him; yet another new experience for the two of them, and when he froze Sakura immediately felt as though she'd done something wrong, clamming up and turning bright red as he breathed heavily against her throat.
'Hoeee! He's going to think I'm some wanton minx, now!'
If Syaoran hadn't known what she'd been struggling with, before, he certainly did now, and the thought made her balk.
Truthfully, Syaoran's mind was racing just as much as hers, and he was just as scared in the face of these new emotions. However, if he was being honest, the first thought that ran through his mind in that instant was that he would do anything to hear her make that sound again. The notion made him blush, hidden against her neck. But in a rush of blind passion, spurred on by something he couldn't name, he trailed his tongue over her flesh again, where her scent was strongest. The stroking of his thumb at her shoulder became more intense until it was unconsciously pushing the fabric of her blouse away to reveal soft skin.
His mouth pressed to it, causing both their minds to shut off in the wake of their passion at this new, uncharted territory. Sakura gasped and squeezed his head to anchor herself in a way that he could have easily mistaken for discomfort had he not intimately known better. He raised his eyes to her quickly burnishing green ones, and then they both knew they were lost.
No longer coherently thinking about anything but each other, he scooped one arm under her legs and the other around her shoulders, lifting Sakura to carry her disconnectedly towards the bed. Pressing her almost reverently into the mattress, Syaoran nuzzled his nose against hers again before kissing her, the fire slightly less poignant this time as the trance weakened.
"Syaoran, are you… sure?" her heady voice was music to his ears. Her question, however, gave him pause as his intoxicated mind tried to think up the reasons he hadn't been sure, before.
"Are you?"
"I don't… know," she started, softly, "But it feels right… Is that bad?"
He wished he could answer her better than just another I don't know, but this was all so foreign that he simply couldn't articulate just what it was he was feeling. He settled for what his heart was telling him.
"It feels right to me, too."
Sakura reached up to brush her fingers through his bangs, ghosting her fingertips across his cheek until he couldn't help but close his eyes.
"Syaoran… please keep kissing me."
It wasn't a wanton plea or a command, but had the effect of both. The amber haired boy leaned down to meld their lips together again, occasionally straying to kiss her nose, cheeks, eyelids, or neck. The warmth in their bellies was slowly turning into a fire, and unable to bear its' heat, Sakura stopped stroking his cheek to loosen the top buttons on her blouse, panting his name when she felt his fingers join hers and continue downwards until her bare flesh shivered in the night air.
Still warm, she arched her back to reach behind herself and unhook her bra, sighing when his thumbs stroked her shoulders, pushing the straps down to kiss the shallow grooves where the elastic had pulled. His hands abandoned her shoulders to smooth over her now-bare stomach, encouraged by her sighs and breathy moans. When he shyly, gently, brushed the underside of one of her breasts with a thumb, she gasped and didn't pull away, prompting him to move the fabric out of the way and cup the heated flesh.
Sighing in pleasure as his mouth descended on her nipple, Sakura scraped her nails lightly against his scalp, the fire burning hot and heady against her insides with every pass of his tongue until she whined out her disappointment when he pulled his body away abruptly. Breathing heavily, she couldn't open her eyes in her lust-induced haze, until his body fell over hers again moments later, and she shuddered against him when it was with flesh on flesh, both of them hissing in ecstasy at the sensation.
"Sakura…"
She barely had time to register the feeling of cloth sliding away and then his other hand gliding down her middle, before she was drowning in a sea of sensation as he gently pushed his fingers into her and moved them slowly in and out. Her nerves thrummed and exploded one by one, until all she could do was writhe and mewl his name in want. She became vaguely aware that her lover intended to bring her all the way over the edge just before the universe combusted all at once, leaving her gasping and shuddering as white hot pleasure rocketed up and down her spine; the world bleeding away into a thousand colors, until finally solidifying into just the amber of his eyes that watched her so tenderly. She panted.
"Syaoran…"
She felt she should say something, anything to let him know how much she loved and wanted him in that moment, but he shushed her gently, kissing her lips once; twice; before he braced his knee against the bedding and pressed into her. It took a few attempts to do so in a way that was comfortable for both of them, but she was patient with him and he was careful. She squeaked a little at the novel sensations when he succeeded, pressing up and molding herself to him for comfort, which only made him groan her name and weigh his forehead against hers in bliss, gently pushing her hips back down.
"D-don't…" he hissed against her, "Don't move…"
"But…" she pleaded deliriously, wanting nothing more than to move and reach that apex again. Her hands went to his hips, flexing her fingers against the skin there and trying desperately to communicate what she needed, but he remained still.
The coil slowly started to unwind as the seconds ticked by, until she whimpered into his ear, "Syaoran, please."
He kissed her again to soothe her, before all coherent thought shattered into a thousand pieces as he finally moved against her; crumbling into dust and reforming until it was just him, just her name; face, and body entwined with the others'.
Syaoran nuzzled her cheek as he groaned her name forcibly. Always vibrant and alive, her magical aura rose to meet his, twining around it; both comforting and wholly exciting at once. He was taking her higher than she could ever reach using any Card, and she climbed the zenith with him while they murmured sweet nothings into each other's ears.
His breath became short choked gasps, and hers needy whimpers as she buried her face into his neck. Sensations intensified; the fire burgeoning into a searing hot burn as the others' names left their lips in an impassioned cry. The sound of her laughter, of her sobs, confused him; thrilled him, and stripped him bare of anything but love and adoration as the ache finally broke free and they both collapsed against each other.
Gulping in shuddering breaths, both shivering occasionally with the aftershocks of their euphoria, they finally looked into each other's eyes again and clasped their hands tightly together, fingers threading and locking. Sakura watched him with glassy eyes, still shimmering slightly with rapturous tears that he kissed away. She graced him with the most beautiful smile he'd ever seen, and then the sparkling emeralds slid closed before her head tipped contentedly to the side, and he knew she'd succumbed to slumber.
Kissing her forehead one last time, he moved to lie beside his beloved, curling around her and drifting off into his own dreamland.
…
Syaoran turned over to throw his arm around Sakura, but was met with nothing but empty space. Opening his eyes, they were immediately accosted by sunlight, telling him morning had arrived. The indent in the sheets beside him was still clinging to warmth, signifying that she hadn't been up long, and the sound of rushing water told him why she'd gotten up in the first place.
He understood; he was still covered in dried sweat, himself, and it was certainly not the most comfortable he'd ever been. So he couldn't blame her for wanting to shower first thing.
It was then that his mind screeched to a deafening halt. Last night hadn't been a dream – they'd really…
Suddenly he was gripped with an anxiety so terrifying that it took all his self-control not to lean over the bed and empty his stomach. What had come over them? Had they even been thinking straight, or was this an impulsive decision on both their parts? Would it make things awkward between them? Could it… ruin their new marriage? That thought was most condemning of all. What if they'd ruined this beautiful love they'd shared for years with one night's passionate judgment…?
Everything slowed to a crawl as a darker corner of his mind conjured up another reason for why Sakura might have washed almost immediately after their lovemaking. Had she felt dirty? Not so much in the physical sense, but psychologically? He felt he might be sick, after all.
But still, she'd looked so happy when it was over… That couldn't be true, could it? He was so engrossed in his own thoughts that he didn't notice Sakura watching him quietly from the doorway.
Sakura, for her part, was resigned to see this through. She'd thought about last night a lot in the shower, having needed to get away from him to think straight. She silently watched him go through the same emotions, now, the evidence clear on his face.
'Maybe we did go too far, too soon, but there's nothing we can do about it now, if we love each other,' she decided resolutely.
She wore only a towel – something she'd never have even considered doing until now, but what was the point? Modesty and embarrassment seemed like defeated concepts in her brain at this point.
Perhaps things could never truly go back to the way they had been yesterday afternoon, but was that a deal-breaker? Their relationship had been constantly changing ever since the day they met, and it had only brought them closer. There was no way she was letting it do anything else, this time.
With a start, she realized she'd been staring at him for a long time. He had long since noticed her there and was fluctuating between giving her sad, amber-colored puppy dog eyes and burning a hole in the mattress with his gaze. She wished she had the right answers for him. For them both.
With a shaky sigh she stepped into the room, sitting beside him on the bed and disarming him with her own gentle jade-eyed fixation.
"I'm not upset," she told him. "Or angry, or anything like that. Just… confused, like I know you probably are."
He looked down at that.
"I just… never expected us to take that step yet," he confessed. "We'd even talked about waiting, and now… I'm just scared we screwed up."
Despite the seriousness of the moment, Sakura smiled for him and took his hand in hers.
"Even if we did screw up, we'll move past it. We still have our whole lives ahead of us, after all."
She lifted their clasped hands and kissed his knuckles before moving forward, pressing their bodies together in a fierce embrace.
"I love you… So, so much, Syaoran. This could never change that."
He clutched her tightly to him, heedless of her wet body.
"I love you, too. More than anything. And I'm not going to let this change that, either."
They stayed in each other's arms for several moments, just relishing in their partner's company and the fact that this experience didn't have to change their relationship. Slowly, tentatively, Sakura spoke again:
"Last night… didn't feel like a mistake," she admitted softly, afraid the moment would shatter if she were to raise her voice above a whisper. "Did it feel that way to you?"
He was silent for a minute as he contemplated her words. She let him think; content in the way his hands kept rubbing her back through the towel. He realized with startling clarity that he didn't feel any regret for last night. All his fears had been focused on if his relationship with Sakura had changed for the worse, and the girl had made it perfectly clear that that was not the case.
"No," he stated honestly, "It didn't feel that way at all."
She nodded against his bare chest, blushing prettily as she thought about her next words.
"I'd like to… keep doing it, if you would."
His cheeks matched hers, but he smiled and leaned down to kiss her, slow and leisurely.
"I'd like that too, Sakura."
His kisses increased, becoming deeper as she moved to lie backwards on the mattress. Slowly, reverently, he parted the towel.
…
The rest of that day involved unpacking boxes of Sakura's belongings. She didn't have that much, but it took longer because the newlyweds kept sneaking furtive gazes at each other, blushing before looking away coyly, and sneaking lingering kisses and cuddles after almost every box.
They felt so safe and close to each other at that moment, and neither of them wanted it to end. Sakura recalled her conversations with some of her friends, where they'd felt vulnerable; almost dirty after rushing their first times, and she'd worried after waking up next to him that that might be the case with them. However, it was evident that they both felt comfortable and happy during and after, and she was eternally grateful for that fact.
Syaoran was experiencing similar sentiments. Being with Sakura had been breathtaking and almost had the power to overwhelm him with an emotion he couldn't quite put a word to, but now that they'd established their love wasn't going anywhere, it was less daunting and had transformed into a completely blissful feeling.
He found he couldn't keep his hands off her body whenever they took breaks, and for her - while it was a little embarrassing to have him ardently and endearingly running the pads of his thumbs over the undersides of her breasts while he held her - it was also exhilarating to know her husband loved her body so much. If she was being perfectly honest - and she usually wasn't when it came to this - that particular part of her had always caused her a bit of anxiety. It wasn't as though they were the smallest she'd ever seen, but she'd always been a little self-conscious about what he would think when they finally did take the step they'd taken last night. Now, under his constant affections, she couldn't remember why she'd ever felt that way.
"Syaoran, if you keep hugging me we'll never get done," she teased, not at all eager to separate from him, herself.
"Oh... Yeah..."
Despite the distractions, their house became a home by that evening, and Sakura had even gotten over her previous trepidations about calling it such, much to Syaoran's delight when she confided this in him.
Having time to kill before bed, they went grocery shopping so that Sakura could feed him her famous pancake recipe in the morning. She'd been devastated to learn that he'd never had pancakes before, and promised to rectify this error, prompting him to suggest they go to the store and get some of her favorite things while they were at it, along with any essentials he was running low on. Birth control was a priority they had to take care of as well, though they'd both blushed profusely while putting it on the list and knew they had to have another serious talk sooner or later.
It took them twice as long to make dinner as well, since they still couldn't keep their hands off each other, and they almost let it burn twice. However, Syaoran was adept in the kitchen and managed to save it both times.
Now, as they were climbing into bed together, there were no further feelings of awkwardness. Wrapping around each other, Sakura snuggled into his warmth while Syaoran pulled her against him, burying his nose in her hair and inhaling.
"I love you, Sakura," he spoke into the hollow beneath her ear, shifting and electrifying the fine hairs with his breath.
She murmured his name, sighing happily before slurring a soft "I love you, too" in return.
Syaoran smiled as he watched her drift off. The past two days had been filled with milestones, and they'd overcome them all for the better, and that gave him hope for their future together.
Sakura moved in her early stages of sleep, shifting so close he could feel her heart beating languidly against his ribcage.
'I'll gladly face a thousand and one more challenges if it means I can be with her, just like this,' Syaoran thought fondly, dragging his knuckles over her cheek. His apartment was now their apartment, and they could spend every day in it like this, together; making their meals together, and supporting each other through college and work, and falling asleep next to each other at the end of the day. Thinking about it left his heart feeling full and content. This simple abode had never felt more like home to him.
He was asleep within moments, body curled protectively around his wife.
...
A/N: Well there you have it! I tried my best to keep them as in-character as possible and focus on the emotions newlyweds might feel (though I've never been married, myself). Thank you all so much for reading, I love every review you guys grace me with!
Will there be a fourth 'Promise' installment? Only Possk knows!
