It's No Secret that the Both of Us Are Running Out of Time
"I'm going to be here a little longer than I thought."
"How much longer? We miss you!" Graham said, on the other line.
"Next Thursday."
"You'll have been gone a whole week by then! Liam's already antsy for you to come back."
"I know, and I'm sorry. But, there's no way I can come back sooner." Emma whispered. She knew Killian wasn't asleep – that he was listening to every single thing Emma said – but she still tried to have a quiet voice. "My plans have changed, though."
"What do you mean?"
"Well, do you remember how I told you I used to live in Arizona and New Mexico before moving to Storybrooke? Well, I ran into an old friend, and I want Liam to meet him."
"Okay… Is he coming back with you on Thursday?"
"Not exactly." She started at Killian's back, breathing softly next to her. "I bought Liam a ticket out here for tomorrow at 10:00, and I need you to bring him to the airport."
"Absolutely not! He can't fly out there alone!"
"I already talked to the airport staff and I've set up a service they have for sending kids on airplanes by themselves. It's usually for kids flying back and forth for divorced parents, but it will work for him, too."
"What about school?"
"I already emailed his teachers asking for homework for him to do while he's here."
"Leia, I just don't see why he can't meet him at a later time… You're making no sense whatsoever."
Emma closed her eyes, knowing that how much Graham cared for Henry was going to be the downfall of this plan. "Graham, this isn't a negotiation. He needs to come out here tomorrow."
"Why? Tell me, Leia. Why is this so important?"
"Because his father wants to meet him, okay?" The words came out before she could stop them, and she mentally slapped herself.
"You told me – us – that his father was dead…"
Emma bit her bottom lip. "I know, and I'm sorry. But he's not, and I want Liam to finally meet him."
"You never went out there for a case, did you? You went out there to see your ex-husband?"
"Graham, it's late and… Can we just talk about this later? I'm not in the mood for a fight, especially about this."
"Leia, I really don't feel comfortable sending him alone, especially to see a man that you clearly kept out of his life for a reason. What if something happens?" It was quick and to the point, like there was not a single ounce of debate available in the conversation.
Emma had to do the one thing she didn't want to, the one thing that could make Graham hate her even more in this moment than she knew he did. But if she ever wanted to divorce Killian, if she ever wanted to move on, she had to do it. "It's not up to you, Graham. He's my son, and I want him to meet his father. You're not his dad – you don't get to make these kinds of decisions about him."
There was an uncomfortable silence before he finally mumbled, "You're right."
"Can you please not tell Liam that he's coming here to meet his father? It's going to be tough enough to introduce them without him thinking about it the whole plane ride over."
Graham cleared his throat. "Uh, sure."
"Is he busy right now? Can I talk to him?"
"Avery's over, but I'm sure he'll want to talk. One minute." His voice was off, and she wasn't quite sure if it was from anger or betrayal, but she tried to push the thought out of her mind.
Killian rolled over to face her, and she was indeed correct that he was wide awake and listening to the entire conversation. "Want me to put it on speaker so you can hear his voice?" She asked. "You'll have to be quiet, though."
Killian nodded, pretending to zip his lips like a child.
Emma pressed the speaker button and waited for Henry to answer.
"Hello? Mom?"
"Hey, kid." Emma replied, looking at Killian's face. After two words, he looked like he had never heard anything more beautiful, and it made her smile, despite the terrible situation. "How was your first day without me?"
"Long, but Graham let Avery come over for a sleepover, so that's pretty cool."
Killian's face dropped at the name, but he didn't comment on it. "Yeah, well you're going to have to send Avery home a little earlier than a normal sleepover tomorrow."
"That's not fair!" He whined, bringing the smile back on Killian's face. "Graham said we could go to Granny's for breakfast!"
"This isn't a discussion, Liam." Emma said, and she could actually see him roll his eyes in her head. "Look, it's for a good reason."
"Oh yeah? What's that?" There was so much sass in his voice, and she couldn't believe that he was able to pull off such a tone after only been in middle school for three days.
"You're coming out to Arizona with me, for the week. Remember how I told you that we lived here when you were a baby? I thought you'd like to visit, since we haven't been back since."
"Are you serious mom?" He asked, and his annoyance immediately turned into glee."Really?"
"Yeah. And you're going to be taking the plane by yourself, so Graham's going to go over all the rules with you, and there will be some people at the airport that will help you fly, okay? But right now, I need you to go pack. Maybe Avery will even help."
"Woo-hoo!" Henry shouted in joy.
"Don't forget your swim suit, okay? It's going to be a lot hotter here than Maine."
"Okay."
"And you can only bring three books."
"Yeah, yeah, three. Got it. I'm going to go pack right now! See you tomorrow, mom!"
"Bye, kid. Can you give it back to Graham?"
"Sure thing."
"He's perfect," Killian said, reaching over and grabbing her hand. "He's absolutely wonderful."
"He's a real spitfire, that's for sure." Emma said just as Graham came back on the phone.
"I see Liam took the news well."
"Yeah, well…"
"Send me the plane ticket and anything else I need to know, okay?"
"Yeah, I'll forward you the email right now."
"I love you, Leia." Graham's words were soft, and Emma could hear the pain behind them. But, more importantly, she could feel Killian drop her hand and tense up.
"I love you too, Graham. I'll see you when Liam and I get back, okay?"
"Bye."
She hung up the phone and turned back to Killian. "Graham seems nice."
"Killian…"
"No, I get it. I was in prison for ten years. Why did I think you'd keep a promise from when we were just kids?"
Emma reached over and cupped his hand. "I have no doubt that we'd still be together if you never got sent away."
Killian gave a half smile, one that didn't quite reach his eyes. "Yeah, well… Life's a bitch."
"It sure is." She agreed.
"Okay, so I'm going to pick him up at the airport, then we'll meet you here back at the hotel and we'll all go out for ice cream, okay?"
Killian nodded and looked like he was going to jump right out of his seat. "I can't wait. I really can't wait."
"Calm down – I can't have two excited puppies. Henry's going to be excited to be on vacation enough already without you riling him up."
Killian laughed. "I've just been dreaming of this moment for so long."
"You do know I'm going to introduce him as Liam, right? I know his name is Henry and that's what we've been calling him for the past 24 hours, but he's spent ten years being called Liam. We're already going to be changing his life forever with you still being alive. Let's take things one step at a time."
Killian put his hand and arm up. "Okay, okay. I'll call him Liam, for now."
"And I'm Leia." Killian rolled his eyes, and Emma sighed, not completely satisfied with his answer, but accepting it as she grabbed the rental car's keys. "I'll be back in an hour."
"Bye, Emma."
"Bye, Killian." She was surprised at how normal the name Emma had become, even in such the short amount of time.
The drive to the airport was short, and her leg was bouncing the entire time. She was a complete wreck, worried about how Henry would react to the news.
She felt like she was at the airport too quickly, and before she knew it, Henry was sprinting towards here with a backpack swinging up and down. "Mom!" Henry yelled as he ran into her arms. "I can't believe you let me do that!"
Emma squeezed him tight. "Yeah, well, I needed you here with me. But don't get too excited. I emailed your teachers this morning and they're going to send me your homework to do while you're here."
"Moooooooooooom!" Henry let go. "Why would you do that? This is supposed to be a vacation!"
Emma smiled. "I'm a mom first, a fun tour guide second. Now, let's go get your suitcase from luggage and then we'll drop it off at the hotel and get ice cream."
Henry's eyes lit up at the word, slightly jumping in his spot as the two of them walked towards baggage claim.
"Do I get to watch you catch a perp?" Henry asked with extra enthusiasm in their drive back to the hotel. "That would be so cool mom!"
"No, but I do want you to meet someone."
"Yeah? Who?"
Emma stared at the road, ignoring his question. "How do you like the weather here?"
"I read about it in geography books, but it's a lot hotter than I thought! I'm glad we didn't just live here for the past ten years! I'd die in the summer!"
Emma smiled. "Yeah, well Storybrooke can get a bit hot, too, you know."
Henry rolled his eyes as they pulled into the hotel parking lot. "Yeah, but this is, like, super hot." Emma laughed as they parked and she went to the trunk to grab his suitcase.
She brought him to the elevators at up to their room. "Now, Liam," she began. "There's a man in there I want you to meet. He might want to hug you and get a little emotional, and that's okay. As your mom, I'm telling you that this man is safe to be around."
Henry rolled his eyes. "I'm not a kid, anymore. I know what a stranger is."
Emma bit her bottom lip before slipping the key card into the lock and waiting for it to beep. As soon as it did, Emma pushed the door open, and the two walked in.
Killian had been sitting on the bed, reading a book he must have found in the dresser drawer when they came in. His head shot up and his eyes went straight to Henry's and, just like she imagined, his eyes immediately began to water. "Swan, he's beautiful." Killian jumped up, completely abandoning the book as he ran over to them, still in the doorway.
He stood for a few seconds before reaching forward and bringing Henry into a big hug. "I've missed you so much, lad."
Henry stood still, eying his mom underneath Killian's arms. He finally brought his arms around the man and patted his back. "Uh, you, too. Have we met?"
Killian pulled back, wiping his eyes with his handless-arm. Henry's eyes opened slightly before trying to hide his surprise. "A long, long time ago, back when you lived here."
"Liam, this is Killian. Killian, Liam." Emma said, and watching the reunion was one of the sweetest things she's ever seen. Even with Henry's hesitant glances towards her, it was absolutely perfect, a moment she was going to remember forever.
"Ice cream!" Emma began, and both boys turned towards her. "Killian, are you in a state that you could come with us for ice cream?"
"I'm not leaving your sides for the next four days, Emma." He gave another look to Henry before going back to the bed and grabbing his jacket.
Henry placed his backpack and suitcase by the chair before walking over to Emma and motioning for her to come closer. "Who is he?" he asked. "I feel like I've seen him before."
Emma stood back up. "We'll talk about it at the ice cream shop."
Henry shifted in his seat next to Emma. Killian had been staring at him non stop since their initial meeting in the hotel room, and Emma could tell it was making him uncomfortable. Under the table, Emma kicked Killian's shin. "Ow!"
Emma rolled her eyes. "Killian, you're creeping him out."
Henry took a scoop of his ice cream before finally sitting up straight in his chair. "Okay, will someone tell me who he is and why he's so excited to see me?"
Emma took a deep breath and turned to face Killian. "Um… He's, uh… Kill?"
Killian looked at Emma before shifting to look at their son. "Hen—Liam, I'm your father."
Henry shook his head. "No, my father's dead. He died, trying to save people out of a burning building." In a panicked state, he turned to look at Emma. "That's what you told me, that he was a hero."
"He was, is, Liam. It's just, I wasn't exactly telling the truth. You see, Killian had to go away for a while, and we couldn't be together anymore. And, I didn't know if we'd ever meet each other again, so I thought… He really is a hero, Liam. He saved us when you were just a baby."
Henry jumped up. "You're lying." He threw down his spoon and ran over to the bathrooms, quickly going into the boys' one.
"Well, that could have gone better," Emma muttered.
Killian stood up. "How did you think this was going to go? He's thought his dad was dead his whole life."
"Where are you going?" Emma asked as he began to turn around.
"To go talk to my son," he responded. "I've waited for this moment for ten years, I'm not going to waste any more time."
Emma slumped down in her seat, bringing another bite of chocolate ice cream up to her mouth. The sweet cold treat tasted bitter, and she pushed it away from herself. She couldn't help the tears that were forming in her eyes. Killian was right, this wasn't what their reunion was supposed to be like, and giving them space to talk would be the best thing for Henry.
It was a while before they came back out, but eventually, the two started walking back. Henry was smiling up at whatever Killian had just said, and Killian had his hand resting on his shoulder. "All better?"
Henry's face dropped when he saw her, but then he looked back up at Killian. "Yeah, it's kind of cool to find out you had a dad after thinking you didn't."
Emma smiled as they sat down together. "I'm glad you're getting along."
Killian gave Emma a small grin before turning back to his son. "We're just going to have to make up for lost time."
Henry nodded his head eagerly as he began scooping the melted ice cream into his mouth. "Killian said we used to go sailing when I was a kid? And he said, if it's okay with you, the three of us could go this week."
"Yeah… Yeah, we could do that." Emma's eyes went straight to Killian's. "We'll have to find a rental place and maybe then we go out tomorrow, or something."
Killian scratched behind his ear. "What do you guys want to do tonight?"
"Well, what's there to do in Arizona? You know, besides it being super hot?"
Killian laughed. "There's lots to do, boy." He reached over and rubbed his hand through Killian's hair. "But first, I think we should go back to the hotel and get to know each other. Sound like a plan?"
Henry took a last spoonful as he nodded. "Come on, let's go!"
Henry was sitting at the table, reading one of the adventure novels he brought from Storybrooke while Emma and Killian talked.
"He's even better than I imagined." He reached forward and punched her shoulder. "You did well, love."
"Thanks, but I can't take the credit. That's all him." Emma looked at her son. "He seems to have taken to you well, you know, after the initial meeting."
"I see a lot of myself in him, besides the whole criminal thing."
"Did you tell him?"
"Not yet… Don't know how to, really."
Emma nodded in agreement as she took a sip of her Sprite. "I can't believe he's actually meeting you."
Killian grinned. "Me neither. It's a dream come true." Killian looked back over at Henry, and Emma had never seen more love in his eyes.
It was something Emma always knew about Killian – he was able to love others with all of his heart. She remembered what it was like to have someone feel that deeply about her.
Graham feels that way about her and Henry, too. But, it's just different than what it was like with Killian. Maybe it was because she could see that Killian appreciates it more, because everything he loved had been taken from him, and suddenly he was given a second chance. Maybe it was just she hadn't seen him in so long that she'd forgotten what it looked like.
"Is that alright, love?" Killian asked.
Emma snapped out of whatever trance she was in. "What?"
"I was just saying that you and Henry could take the bed. I'll sleep on the couch."
Even though Emma was going to make him do so anyway, it was just a reminder that he always put Henry and her first. Memories of that night ten years ago flooded her brain, how he was willing to take the downfall for her.
"You okay there, Emma?"
Emma nodded her head. "Just a little tired." She stood up and walked over to Henry. "You're bunking with me, kid. I'm calling it a night, though, so I'll be in bed if you need me."
"Okay, okay," Henry said, turning the page.
Emma went back over by Killian. "He had a long day. Make sure he doesn't stay up too late tonight, okay?"
"Absolutely," he replied. He stared right into her eyes, as if reading every single thing that has happened to her in the past ten years that she missed. "Goodnight."
"Goodnight."
Emma woke up with a big kick to her shin. As she turned over, she saw Henry with a book open on his chest – he must have fallen asleep while reading the night before. Making sure to keep the book open to his spot, she gently took it out of his hand and placed it on the nightstand next to him.
Grabbing her phone, she slid out of the bed and walked out of the bedroom to the main living room. She saw Killian sitting outside on the patio and padded over to the sliding door, opening it up and slipping out to sit next to him.
"That's new," Killian said, smiling at her and gesturing his only hand towards the vacant chair next to him.
"What's new?"
"Well, I've never seen you wake up before 8:00 in my life, and it's barely 7:00 right now."
Emma rolled her eyes as she settled into the chair. "Whatever."
"It's absolutely true, love!"
Emma reached into her pocket and took out her phone. "It would be 9:00 if we were in Storybrooke."
"Ah, so nothing's changed."
Emma couldn't help her second eye roll of the day, even if it was mere seconds later. Her eyes zeroed in to a small rectangle held in his hand. "What's that?" She asked, straining her neck to see what he had in his hand.
"It's what got me through my time in jail," he admitted, passing it over to her as she sat in the chair next to him. She smiled when she saw what it was – a photograph of her and Henry on the day he was born.
"How did you have this in there?"
"It was in my wallet when I was taken in, and they let me keep it on the wall of my cell. I never put it up, though. I was too afraid someone might take it from me."
"Why would you think they'd take it from you?"
Killian gave Emma a hard look. "I didn't fancy my time in prison, love. I'd prefer not to draw up unwarranted memories."
"Sorry." Emma looked back down at the picture. They were sitting in the back seat of her yellow bug. She remembered how Killian had told her how he put the car seat in safely, that she'd be much more comfortable in the front seat after just giving birth. But she refused, insisting that the back seat was fine. Before she knew what was going on, he had taken a shot of her looking adoringly at her son. "What's on the agenda today, Captain?"
Killian took the photo back, smiling at it as he rubbed his hand over her and their son's faces. "There's a drive in down the road. I was thinking we could see their showing of Peter Pan tonight, perhaps go to that Chinese restaurant we always used to go to before the movie."
"I think Henry'll love it." Emma replied, looking out to face the mountains from the patio.
"And you?" Killian's voice was hopeful, and Emma slowly turned her head back to face him.
Emma gave a soft smile. "I know exactly what you're doing, Killian."
Feigning innocence, Killian drew in a breath. "Who, me? What ever could you be talking about?"
"Do you really think I don't remember the first night we met? Driving the stolen car up to the movie, eating Chinese food with the $10 you had pickpocketed, and just watching the screen because we spent all our money on Cream Cheese Wantons?" Emma reached her arm over and stood up, walking back towards the sliding door. "It may have been well over twelve years ago, but I certainly haven't forgotten."
Just as she was closing the door, she could have sworn she heard a small mutter coming from Killian's direction. "It just seems like you needed reminding…"
She watched him pick the picture back up and stare at it. It was so faded and worn by now that it was a mystery he could even make out their features, but he held onto the picture like his life depended on it.
Emma slid into the room to find Henry rubbing his eyes. "Where's Killian?" he asked, and Emma pointed onto the patio.
"He's just outside. Believe me, kid, he's not going anywhere for the rest of our trip."
Henry walked over to the table and slumped in one of the chairs. "Is he coming to Storybrooke with us?"
His voice was so hopeful, and Emma hated the idea that she was going to burst his bubble. "Unfortunately, no. He has to stay here in Arizona."
Henry pouted. "I want him to come back with us, though. I missed out on having a father. I don't want to lose any more time!"
Emma went over to her son and placed a hand on his shoulders. "You've had Graham. I'm sure Killian's thankful to know he's back in Storybrooke to take care of you." It wasn't a total lie – she was positive that Killian was happy that they found someone who could protect them for all these years.
He just didn't like the idea that Emma had fallen in love with him and was preparing to leave him in that time.
"I know I've had Graham since I was a kid, but he's not my dad, you know?" Henry looked up at her with that look Killian gave her when he knew her resolve was being chipped away. "It's different, and I don't want to give it up so quickly."
Emma patted his back. "Well, there is a man out on that patio that wants to spend the next three days getting to know you. I suggest you go out there and make the best of it before we leave Wednesday morning."
Henry's smile faded as he stood up and walked to the door. He slid it open and stepped out onto the patio. She couldn't hear what he was saying, but something Killian said back made him laugh out loud as he took the seat that Emma had just vacated.
"Storybrooke doesn't have a drive in! This is so cool, Killian!" Henry was nearly bouncing in his seat as they pulled into the vacant spot at the drive in. "Isn't it cool, Mom?"
Emma smiled as she parked. "Definitely," Emma replied, as enthusiastically as she could. "You know, Killian and I used to go to drive-ins all the time when we lived here."
Henry unbuckled his seatbelt and leaned forward so his head was right between Killian and Emma's. "Really?"
"It's true, lad." Killian unbuckled his seat and put his only hand on the car door. "Now, what can I get you guys? Does the lady still prefer Milk Duds?" Emma agreed, wondering how Killian could remember something like that after all these years. "Liam? What would you like?"
"Popcorn with lots and lots of butter!" Henry then turned to Emma. "Can I go with Killian to get our stuff?"
"Sure, kid." Emma dug around her purse for a $20. "This should be enough for everything. Killian?"
"Yes, love?"
(And she would never admit to her stomach still fluttering at the sentiment…)
"Don't let him put too much butter on his popcorn. Last time, he put so much, it soaked right through the bag and stained his pants."
"Moooom! Stop embarrassing me!" Henry whined before turning to his father. "She's making it out to be worse than it was."
Killian merely laughed. "Alright, not too much butter," he agreed, but Emma could have sworn he still winked at their son.
They got out of the car and walked off toward the concession stand, talking about god knows what on the way there.
She let out a deep breath, digging into her phone and taking it out. She dialed Graham's number, desperate to talk to him again.
"Hello?"
"I miss you."
There was a sigh on his end. "I miss you, too. This apartment is too big without you both here."
"We'll be back soon." It was silent for a moment, and Emma could almost feel the tension through the phone. "Graham? You still there?"
"Why did you tell me he was dead?" He blurted out.
"It's… complicated."
"I just keep roaming our house, trying to figure out why you'd lie about something like that. If you moved here while he was still there, clearly there were no feelings left in that relationship. I just can't figure out why you'd lie."
"I really wish I had an answer to give you, but I don't."
"Did he hurt you?"
"He'd never lay a finger on me."
"Emotionally?"
"No."
"Then why?"
It was Emma's turn to sigh. "I guess, I just didn't see a life with him anymore. I didn't think I'd ever see him again, and I wanted to move on."
"You don't have to say someone's dead to move on…"
"Like I said, Graham. It's complicated." Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Killian and Henry laughing as they walked back. "I've got to go. I'll call you tomorrow, okay?"
"Okay."
"I love you."
"I love you, too. Tell Liam I say hi."
"I will. Bye," Emma took the phone away from her ear and clicked the "end" button. She hated the mess she had been thrown into, but she tucked it away in the back corner of her mind as she reached across the console to open the door for Killian and Henry. "I wasn't aware large sodas were in the order?"
"We have a smart lad, Swan. He gave numerous reasons as to why a large Coke with three straws was much better than three bottled waters." Henry smiled as he placed all the candy in the backseat.
"We're not going to all fit in the front seat…" Henry noted, looking in between his parents.
"You and Killian can sit on the roof. I'm fine in here," she replied, adjusting the front seat until it was slightly reclined.
"Absolutely not," Killian walked around the car until he could pull her door open. "The hood is plenty big for the three of us." He grabbed her hand and brought her out of the car. "Up on three, one, two…" And, before he reached three, he placed his hands on her waist, giving her a slight wink before lifting her onto the car.
"Cool!" Henry yelled as he went straight to the front and climbed onto the car and settled in right next to Emma. Killian chuckled as he put all the food in front of them, grabbed a blanket from the back seat, and hoisted himself up next to Henry and Emma.
"This was my favorite movie as a child," Killian said as he reached for the milk duds and passed it over to Emma, pulling the popcorn up and placing it next to Henry.
"Mine, too!" Henry smiled with glee. "Peter Pan is so cool!"
"I'm more of a Hook fan, meself."
Emma rolled her eyes. "I thought you were a fan of Tinkerbelle? You encouraged me to wear that costume to that couples party in 2002." She lifted an eyebrow as she popped in a single Milk Dud.
"I was Captain Hook, if you remember, darling," Killian licked his lips. "And, I was much more a fan of the woman in the dress than the particular character."
"Gross," Henry said, reaching for a handful of popcorn. "Why would she even go as Tinkerbelle? Her brown hair screams more Wendy, to me."
Both Emma and Killian's faces stilled at his sentence. She was really blonde – she'd just been dying it for the past ten years. Instead of acknowledging his comment, Killian pointed to the screen. "It looks like it's about to start."
Henry settled in between Killian and Emma, and she couldn't help but wonder if this is what their life would be like on a regular basis if he hadn't gotten locked up. The three of them going to movies, cuddled together, joking and making their son blush with Killian's comments on Emma's attractiveness.
Well, it was a moot point. Maybe she and Graham weren't as openly flirtatious as she and Killian always were, but they were still a family. The three of them might not cuddle on the couch, per se, but they had breakfast and dinner together almost every night.
The movie started at 8:30 in Arizona, which meant it was 10:30 in Storybrooke, and that Henry was out by the time the Darlings' made it to Neverland. "Do you want to stay or go back to the hotel?" Killian asked, causing Emma to even realize that Henry was sleeping.
Emma looked up at the screen quickly before settling back into the car. "We haven't even gotten to the good part." She turned and smiled at him. "We could stay a little longer, if you want to…"
"I'd like that," Killian nodded, turning back to the movie.
Emma kept stealing looks at Killian. Sometimes, he'd notice her staring at him, creating a deep tension as they looked into each other's eyes. She'd forgotten how deep they were, forgotten how she could see every single thought going through his mind by just looking at his face.
She'd quickly go back to the screen whenever their eyes locked.
It was only when Emma's eyes started to droop that Killian reached over and touched her. "Emma, love, we should get back to the hotel." She slowly opened her eyes as she agreed.
She put her hand on Henry's shoulder and gently shaking him. "Liam," she whispered, trying to wake up their son. "Liam, we need to get back to the hotel."
Henry grunted before turning to Killian and snuggling in deeper, keeping his eyes shut tight.
"Liam," she said, a little louder this time.
"Not yet," Henry replied.
Killian smiled down at Henry and pulled him in tighter as Emma continued to wake him up. "You've been sleeping for nearly an hour, Liam. You'll be much more comfortable in a bed."
"Do we have to go, Dad?" Henry breathed as he kept his position tucked into Killian's side.
Killian froze, looking down at Henry. She'd seen that look only once before, and in that moment, she was hit with the memory.
—
"Emma, love, you can do this!" Killian squeezed Emma's hand a little tighter.
"I can't, Killian. It hurts, it hurts so much," she sobbed, shaking her head as tears came out of her eyes.
He reached his stump across the bed to wipe the hair out of her eyes. "Yes you can, you know why?" Emma shook her head, closing her eyes and biting her bottom lip. "Because you're Emma Jones, and you're the strongest woman I've ever met."
"You think so," she groaned out.
Killian kissed her forehead. "No. I know so. Now, I think it's time we call the doctor in."
Emma nodded, keeping her eyes squeezed shut while she brought her hand up to the bar to call the nurses station.
The rest of Henry's birth was mostly a blur. She knew she had nearly broken Killian's only hand at one point, but when Henry was cleaned up and given to Killian that everything came back into focus.
"Congratulations," the doctor said. "Here's your perfectly healthy boy."
Emma opened her eyes to see Killian looking down at their son, love and adoration in his stare. His expression was one of shock as he walked over to Emma, sitting down in the chair next to her bed.
The doctors and nurses left, leaving Killian and Emma alone with the newborn. Killian finally looked back at Emma, slowly moving his head back. "We have a son, Killian. You're a daddy." Her voice was hoarse, but she still got the words out.
Killian looked back at Henry. "I'm a dad," he said. "You're a mom, and I'm a dad."
Emma smiled as she watched the realization dawn on him. Yes, they knew for the past nine months that they were going to be parents, but it wasn't until this moment that it registered with both of them that she was a mom, and he was a dad.
"Can we go to the pool, Killian? Please, pleaseeee?" Henry begged, looking at Killian with the biggest puppy eyes Emma had ever seen.
He shook his head as he said, "Not yet, lad. You've got homework."
"Did Mom make you say that?" Henry asked, rolling his eyes as he turned to look at Emma. "C'mon, Mom! I'm on vacation! Why are you making me do homework?"
Killian laughed as Emma held up her hands in defeat. "Wasn't me, kid. This is all Killian."
Henry looked back at Killian. "But I don't want to do homework! I want to go to the pool and go down the waterslides."
"I'll make you a deal, Liam," Killian started, and Henry immediately perked up. "I'll help you with your homework this morning, and then we'll all go to the pool this afternoon. Deal?"
Henry let out a huff as he crossed over to the table in the room. "Fine. But we're getting some Choco Tacos from the snack bar while we're there."
"Wouldn't have it any other way." Killian walked over to the chair next to Henry and plopped down, looking at the screen. "So, what homework do you have?"
"It looks like Mr. Gold responded with… THREE PAGES OF MATH?" Henry turned back to Killian. "Come on, Killian. This is ridiculous!"
"The sooner you stop arguing, the sooner we'll get those chocolate tacos." Killian pointed out, leaning in towards the screen.
Henry let out a grunt as he leaned in closer, too, grabbing a pencil and the paper Emma had bought the night before.
Emma went and sat on the bed, watching Henry and Killian work together. It was cute, if she were being honest. Killian using his fingers and drawing diagrams to help Henry understand the word problems he was doing.
Graham has helped Henry with his math most of the time, since Emma never even finished high school. But it was different, seeing Killian help Henry. Maybe it was because they looked so similar doing it, like a father helping his son, or maybe it was how Killian's eyes perk up when Henry got the right answer, but there was something about how he was helping him that took a needle and prodded her heart.
She grabbed her phone and took a quick snapshot of Killian and Henry both leaning over the table and smiled as she put it as her iPhone background.
Killian helped a sleepy Henry settle into bed before walking over to Emma, gesturing with his head to go outside. Emma slid the patio door open, and together, they went outside into the cool Arizona air.
"The pool really tired him out," Emma noted as she sat down in the chair she had sat in the previous morning.
Killian chuckled as he sat down in his chair. "I don't think the junk food or sun helped too much. Plus, climbing those stairs to the waterslides over and over again, it's a wonder he made it this late."
"Look at you, already figuring out parenthood after two days." Killian's smile faded as he looked out at the mountains. There was a strained silence, and Emma wished she could take back her words. "I didn't mean…"
"No, you're right. I suppose I don't know what it means to be a father," Killian's voice was off, faded, and the words were so quiet, she could barely hear them. "Who am I kidding, two years with a baby and then two days with a twelve year old doesn't exactly make me parent of the year."
"Killian…"
He shrugged, as if trying to brush it off, but it was like something had snapped in him. Emma could see his defeat, self-hatred, and she could tell it was a moment that she wasn't going to be able to convince him out of this sadness.
"Do you think… Do you think we'd still be married if I never went to prison?" It was quiet, as if he was treading the topic lightly.
"Technically, we are still married." Emma reached her hand over and held his stump.
"You know what I mean," Killian said, turning to face her. His eyes were becoming red, his lip pouted.
Seeing Killian cry was one of the things Emma had hated most ten years ago, and there wasn't anything that changed it now. He was such a confident man, always sure of everything, that whenever he broke down, it crushed her.
"I don't know, maybe." Emma said, trying to soothe him. "I think we'd probably have a couple more kids."
"You think?"
Emma nodded. "But Killian, even you have to admit this wouldn't have been a good life for us. We were criminals, and we were always on the run. What kind of life would that have been for Henry?"
"I can't believe I only have two more days with him before I lose him forever."
Emma shook her head. "You're not going to lose him, Killian. Now that Henry's met you, there's no way he's going to let you out of his life. He has too big of heart for that."
"Maybe." She saw him take in a deep breath, trying to calm his breathing. "But don't forget, I'm also losing you, Emma."
"Now that you're in Henry's life, you're going to have to be in mine, too."
"That's not what I meant." Killian stood up and went to stand by the railings.
Emma followed him, taking the few steps it took to stand right next to him. "What do you mean, then?"
Killian slowly brought his face until they were looking at each other. "How am I supposed to look at you, and not run my hand through your hair?" He asked, reaching his only hand up and barely touching the brown curl at the bottom. "How am I supposed to look into those green eyes," He brought his hand up to her glasses and took them off, shutting them and placing them on the ledge. "And not get lost in them?"
"Killian…" It was supposed to be a warning, but it sounded more breathless than it should have.
"How am I supposed to see you kiss another man, knowing that my lips are the ones you should be kissing?" He was too close, it was making her mind go numb and, as if he knew what he was doing to her, he continued on. "How am I supposed to look at you and not imagine all that we had, what we could have now?"
"You make it seem like it's easy for me, Killian."
"Isn't it?"
She looked at his face up and down, bringing her thumb up to wipe away the water that began seeping from his eye. "No." With the simple confession, she grabbed her glasses and turned around, putting them on as she walked into their hotel room. "Goodnight, Killian."
She heard a breath as he whispered, "Goodnight, Emma."
