Challenge #33: Page 394 The only requirement is to have Severus Snape tell another HP character to turn to page 394.

Title: The Satisfaction of Page 394

Rating: PG-13

A/N: 38 minutes minus spell/grammar check.


"Roderick! Bring that forward now!"

Seated behind his large ebony desk, Severus Snape watched as the scarlet blush and look of embarrassed foreboding passed across the face of the fourth-year student. It was obvious that the damnable brat did not want to turn in whatever it was that he had been sneaking looks at for the entire lesson.

The boy pressed his lips together as though steeling himself; and, rising from his seat, he shuffled forward with a thick leather-bound book clutched tightly in his arms. When he reached the front of the room, Roderick slid the book hastily onto his professor's desk and stepped back, his eyes wide.

Taken illegally from the Restricted Section, no doubt, Severus thought. He glanced briefly at the tome – and then glanced again. His dark eyes opened wide and then narrowed quickly as they slid across the embossed, silvery script of the cover.

"Fifty points from Gryffindor," he snapped in agitation, reaching out and sliding the text beneath a stack of parchment. "And I shall be speaking to your Head of House concerning this matter. Get back to work."

An hour later, the professor of Potions sat in blessed solitude within the sanctuary of his office. He was attempting to grade a pile of essays he had assigned to his NEWT class, but found that his mind was simply not up to the task of cooperating at the moment. Tossing his quill on the desk, he scowled.

What on earth would have possessed the little beast to bring such a book into his dungeons? And to be snatching looks at it when he should have been working on his sleeping draught -- it was intolerable. The boy could have killed them all with the inattention he'd been showing to his cauldron, and for what?

He would take pleasure in informing Minerva of her charge's inadequacies the instant he saw her. Spotting the object in question half hidden beneath the same stack of papers, he pulled it free and turned it over in his hands. The Sorcerer's Guide to All Things Sexual, indeed. He snorted in derision. As though any competent wizard would have need of such an aid.

Deciding to get back to work, he tossed it to the side and reached for his quill; the sound of pages flapping open, however, drew his attention. Stretching out a hand to close the bothersome book, he was stopped when a splash of color caught his eye. For the second time that day, Severus' eyes widened in shock.

---

"Severus, do you have a moment?"

Before the professor had time to respond, his office door had opened and clicked closed again, and his rival Head of House was standing in front of him. At any other moment, the hands resting jauntily on her hips and the flaring nostrils would have been the signal for the beginning of one of their infamous arguments, but given the fact that a highly distressing ache was currently pulsing through his groin, Severus found that he really had other pressing matters on his mind.

"I meant to seek you out at dinner, but you weren't there," Minerva said. "I wanted to discuss your most recent deduction of House points."

He managed to keep his surprise to learn that he'd read straight through the evening meal to himself. Clearing his throat, he shifted in his seat, attempting to relieve some of his discomfort.

"Yes, well, I had other matters to take care of. At any rate, I caught one of your precious Gryffindors reading offensive and inappropriate material in class." Tugging the book free from the drawer he had hastily stashed it in, he flung it in her direction across the desk, as though casting away a mound of filth.

Leaning forward, she plucked up the book, read the title, and gave a light laugh. "Fifty points for this? Why, I daresay nearly all of the students have had a peek at it over the past few weeks. Haven't you seen them passing it about in the corridors and at mealtimes?"

"You may find the situation humorous, Minerva, but I will certainly not condone such a book!" Severus snarled, annoyed that she was not viewing the situation in the seriousness that it deserved. "It is full of lewd pictures, and suggestive descriptions, and -- er..."

"Severus, you hypocrite! You've gone through it, haven't you? And yet you dare naysay against Aidan Roderick?" A dark glare suddenly crossed the Deputy Headmistress' features, and she turned for the door, shaking her head in disgust.

Incensed, a scowling Severus rose suddenly from his chair. "Incidentally, chapter seventeen might be of interest you. Page 394 in particular," he leered, glaring at her retreating back as she swung his office door open. "It certainly held my attention."

He smirked grimly when she paused, taking pleasure in the fact that she seemed to have involuntarily clutched the book tighter in her grasp.

"Oh, really, now, Severus," she responded, her voice sounding as stiff as her posture. Free hand holding the door ajar, she tossed a backwards glance over her shoulder, surveying him shrewdly for a moment. He could not help but notice the downward sweep of her eyes. "That much is apparent. Although I rather thought it might have left you far more satisfied than you appear to be."

And so saying, she swept from the room with a highly contented smirk of her own, leaving the Potions Master blushing, furious, and without the colorful visualizations he had been intending to use to aid him with his predicament.