"...people live their lives bound by what they accept as correct and true... that is how they define reality. But what does it mean to be correct or true? Merely vague concepts... their reality may all be an illusion."
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Chapter 2
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The second time he woke up, he found himself in the hospital.
He opened his eyes and looked up to see that the ceiling was white and perceived the characteristic antiseptic smell. He felt relief. No more Tsukuyomi.
He felt relief when he realized that everything was just a bad dream.
And apparently, the dobe had found him and brought him to Konoha's hospital. He struggled to sit up. His body felt strange. Frowning, he lifted his arms. They were too skinny, and smooth. He was supposed to be bigger, and only have one arm…
His eyed widened.
"What the…"
The door opened. He looked up and a nurse came in.
"You're awake!" she said, smiling. "Hold still, let me check you over."
"What?" He asked. Not because he couldn't understand what the nurse was saying, but because he was still trying to assimilate his situation.
Fear and turmoil were two perfect words to describe what he was feeling at this very moment.
"Just sit still, Sasuke-san," the nurse said.
"What?" He asked again, scooting away from her.
"Sasuke," she said soothingly, but he was not ready to be soothed.
He looked to his arms again. They were small, like a child's, and smooth. He reached up and tugged at his hair. He had very long hair loosely collected and tied in a samurai style pony.
"No," He said. Vaguely he was aware of the nurse speaking to him but he wasn't paying attention. "No! That's not right."
Other people rushed into the room. Some chakras that he recognized from earlier and he did not want to see right now, that he did not want to have to face, especially the first one.
He stared at them, not actually seeing anything. "Where is he?" He asked, fully panicked now. "Why isn't he here? Why am I here?"
Shisui appeared next to his bed. "The ninjas that attacked you escaped," he said in a low voice. "I'm sorry."
That wasn't what he was asking. He was asking for Naruto. He didn't care about the foolery of those impostors.
This isn't real. This couldn't be real.
Shisui was dead.
Asuma was dead.
Kiba and Ino were definitely not children.
"Sasuke" The blond girl yelled out in glee. The chakra signature neared him and he sat up, not daring to look to his side. He definitely didn't want to have a panic attack like the first time. "What happened!? We were so worried when you didn't attended to our mission! Who attacked you? How are you feeling—"
"Ino, perhaps you should let him have some time to himself if you don't want him to react like the first time," Asuma called out. His tone was calm and relaxed, though not without a hint of worry. Sasuke grit his teeth as the man leaned over from his chair by the bed and tried to look at Sasuke in the eyes. "Do you remember what happened, Sasuke-Kun?"
Sasuke turned his head away towards the wall and remained silent. He heard a scoff from the other side of the room. "The idiot was probably experimenting with his Sharingan and put himself under a genjutsu," a mocking voice called out. "It's not like he hasn't done it before. The last time he was running away from an invisible giant spider while screaming like a little girl" He said with a smirk on his face. "You were lucky that team seven wasn't in the training grounds this morning or Naruto would be laughing his ass off right now. But that doesn't meant I don't tell any of this to your best friend."
"Kiba!" Asuma's voice raised. "This is a serious situation! There were traces of foreign chakra in the training grounds and we found Sasuke seriously wounded. Kotetsu and Izumo were attacked by some shinobis from otogakure."
The girl took Sasuke's hand while she watched the exchange, but he slapped her away, not daring to look at the face to those imposters. The motion caused the other two to cease their conversation, as though it was speared and killed. A tense silence pervaded as Sasuke felt four pairs of eyes fall on him—eyes that he refused to meet.
"… Sasuke," his cousin finally called out. "what is happening—"
Nothing of this is real. He kept repeating to himself.
Because in case all of this was real, this could only mean one thing… Naruto and he failed.
And this was his fault.
"No," He kept saying over and over. "This isn't right. This can't be right. Please no."
"…"
"This isn't real…"
"…"
"Please"
".."
"Naruto… where is he?! Please, tell me that he is alright and this isn't my fault! Please!"
They knocked him out soon after.
The third time he woke up, much to his disdain, he found himself… still alive … and still inside this fucking genjutsu.
Once again, his eyes had opened. Something that shouldn't have happened the first or the second time.
Once again, he reached for his face, only to find smooth skin and none of the scars that his years with Orochimaru left.
Once again, he realized he was still in his 12-year-old body, and alive. The unbearable headache could attest to that.
He spent a while just staring at the ceiling. He didn't have to look down to know he wasn't on his right body. He could feel it. His chest was lighter, for one. His legs didn't stretch as far down the bed as they used to.
The same nurse from the first time came in.
"How are you feeling, Sasuke-san?" she asked softly—probably wary of another freak out.
"Can I have a mirror?" He asked. He had to be sure. He couldn't accept it until he saw.
She seemed startled by the request, but nodded and left. A couple minutes later, she was back with a small mirror. He grabbed it with too-small hands.
He lifted it up.
He grimaced and almost began to hyperventilate.
Not only did he have two hands, but his face was noticeably younger. It was rounder, his cheeks were delicate and his skin looked like porcelain. Had he always looked so feminine? His black hair was longer than ever before and overall he looked rather childish and… innocent. If one ignored the looming darkness in the twin black holes that were his eyes, that is.
There Uchiha Sasuke stood, a young man of 18 years who had lived a life in darkness, lies and vengeance, a man who had betrayed his friends and left his home, a man who killed his only brother, a man who by all rights, was meant to be dead. A big failure who only deserved death.
Genjutsu. It had to be.
The Mugen Tsukuyomi, maybe.
Sasuke wasn't sure that he would be able to bear the alternative to those two options.
Because what other explanation could there be?
Maybe he had just gone insane.
Actually, that would explain a lot.
Sasuke nodded to himself while thinking in that option.
Yes. If this turned out to be not the Mugen Tsukuyomi or a very strong genjutsu, then the only other logical explanation was that he had had a psychotic break at some point.
Frankly, Sasuke was a little surprised he had not had one earlier when his family was murdered by his beloved brother, or when he killed Itachi, or the torture training with Orochimaru, but he supposed that these things came on in their own time.
The nurse took the mirror away from him after a while. He let her. He didn't need it anymore.
The next thing she did was to remove his shirt to assess the wounds he have on his body, change his bandages and give him some pain medication.
He let her.
At this very moment, he didn't care about anything.
He was dead, he failed everybody.
His family… his home… his friends… his brother… Naruto…
But being honest with himself, he didn't expect any of this.
Instead of punishment for his sins and crimes, he was receiving care.
Good care. Much better than all those he had received since he was a child.
The nurse checked his vital signs and changed the bandages from a huge wound on his neck and deltoid he didn't knew he had. According to the nurse, it was a miracle that he hadn't bleed out with such wounds.
Sasuke made occasional grimaces because of the pain, but apart from that, he remained in perfect silence enjoying the moment ... he would admit that it felt very comforting to receive the care of another person and the way the nurse smiled at him, felt ... good; he closed his eyes and enjoyed for the first time in many years. A faint smile formed on his lips.
After two hours, a person knocked on the door of the room where he was resting and one of the nurses answered it.
"Oh, Uchiha-sama!"
"Yes, hello Aiko-san. Is Sasuke awake?"
The conversation continued after that point, but Sasuke wasn't listening.
He was too busy staring in shock and trying to resist the urge to call the man in the doorway. His conviction might very well break if he did so.
"Nii-San?!" Sasuke gasped.
Now he knew for a fact that this was an illusion.
Or maybe… he was dead.
