She wanted his mouth on her, and his hands. She wanted to feel his whole body pressing against hers, matching her inch for inch. She wanted to taste him and smell him and get lost in sensation with him, because of him. She just didn't know how to ask for any of it.
Katniss had been trying to hint to Peeta that she wanted him to kiss her for what felt like months now, ever since he had broken up with his last girlfriend, Leevy. She wore lower-cut T-shirts in the hopes that he would notice and want to touch her as much as she wanted him too, as much as she wanted to touch him in turn. She thought he liked her; he was certainly hanging out with her more now than he ever had before.
They had been friends in elementary school, but grew closer after his parents' divorce seven years ago and they had quickly become best friends. That had been great at first, before Peeta started filling out his T-shirts a little more, before those ridiculously attractive golden hairs had started sprouting on his face, before she started undergoing changes as well. For the past three years she had been looking at him differently, trying to hide her longing for him, but she was tired of hiding. She didn't want to have to suffer through another one of Peeta's stupid short-lived relationships with one of the bitches they went to school with.
It was one thing when he had started going out with Clove. That was before Katniss had admitted to herself that she liked him. Of course, she had still hated the girl with every fiber of her being. Only later did she wonder if she might resent Clove more for having been Peeta's first kiss than for any other reason. Katniss had kissed Finnick Odair, one of Peeta's best friends, as a sort of revenge when she discovered that Peeta had kissed Clove, but that hadn't gone anywhere because it was Finnick. While he was arguably the most attractive boy at their school, maybe even in the state, he wasn't the boy she really wanted and she wasn't the girl he wanted.
When Peeta and Clove broke up, Katniss was forced to acknowledge, at least to herself, that she liked him when the first thought that crossed her mind was, maybe he'll ask me out now. But then he had started dating Glimmer Richards. For the longest time, she had been convinced that Peeta was sleeping with her because Glimmer was known to be easy and Peeta was sixteen, so of course he was constantly thinking about sex. But when they had broken up, Peeta had gotten drunk at a party at Johanna's house and cornered Katniss outside of the bathroom. She had thought, maybe this time he'll ask me out. Only, he just wanted to make sure she knew that he hadn't slept with Glimmer.
"She's such a slut, Katnissh. You know. Like, she always wanted… she wanted to… she wanted sex. We were gonna. I mean, of course I wanted to. But then she slept with stupid Cato, so I dumped her. Good riddance," he had breathed in her face and Katniss had turned her head away from his whiskey breath so his next words were spoken in his gruff, drunk voice directly in her ear, making her shiver and tingle all over. "Katnissh, don't let me date anyone like that again, okay? Next time, I'll go for someone like you."
Someone like you. At the time, the words had caused a thrill to rush over her, but later that night when she was reliving the moment, she realized his unspoken words. Someone like you, but not you.
So she had started dating Gale Hawthorne, a boy two years older than her who lived near her and who had been hitting on Katniss for over a year at that point. They had lasted a few months, before concluding that maybe they should try the friendship angle rather than the relationship angle, and she and Peeta were both free agents again.
Then he had started dating Leevy Johnson, who was an even bigger bitch than Glimmer Richards, if that was even possible. Leevy had always hated Katniss, which only made it easier for Katniss to hate her in return. She had monopolized Peeta's time, as girlfriends are wont to do, but Katniss was convinced that Leevy was purposely standing in the way of Katniss and Peeta's friendship, trying to drive a stake between them. It had worked for the seven-month span of their relationship, but the night he broke up with Leevy, Peeta called Katniss and asked her to hang out at his house.
They had talked for hours, catching up on everything, and Peeta had apologized for not being there for her as much as he should have been. Katniss hated herself for it, but when he drove her home that night, she had thought, Kiss me, kiss me. I don't care that you were still in a relationship less than six hours ago. Kiss me.
He hadn't, and she had been disappointed, but at least they were still best friends. That attitude, the gratefulness that she still had his friendship, had lasted all of a month before she started to resent him for his determination to not see her as a suitable candidate for a girlfriend. So she had begun to devise a plan to change his perception of her, to make him realize that she was dateable, damn it. More, that he wanted to date her. For the past month, she had been working hard to do just that.
She was certain that she had almost accomplished her goal. In fact, just a few minutes ago, she had been sure that Peeta was finally going to kiss her when they were lying close together in his bed. She had tried to do what Johanna had told her, to draw attention to her mouth by biting her lip and she had gone a step further by letting her gaze fall obviously to his mouth. He had been leaning in, she was almost sure of it, when his father interrupted and the moment was lost. It would have been cute how flustered Peeta had gotten, if it hadn't led to where they were now: sitting on opposite ends of the giant overstuffed couch in his living room watching Cake Wars because there was nothing better on television.
They were alone in his huge, empty house, for Panem's sake, and all he could concentrate on, it seemed, was a baking program. She crossed her arms over her chest and glared at the TV, angry at the contraption for taking his attention from her. Although she had been the one to suggest watching TV, she hadn't expected to actually watch TV. She had thought, maybe, that being alone in his room was a bit too suggestive for him to handle and that maybe being in the living room would put him more at ease. She feared her plan had worked too well. He was too relaxed and she worried that he had already put their almost-kiss out of his mind.
What would Johanna tell her to do at this point? Probably strip naked and lay in wait for Peeta to fuck her into oblivion, but there was no way she was doing that. She wasn't even sure if she wanted to sleep with him… yet. However, she was sure that she didn't want to sit innocently with him on his father's couch watching Cake Wars. She had to do something.
She pulled her phone out of her pocket and pulled up the group message she had going with Johanna and Madge. While Johanna was all for bold moves and sexuality, Madge was significantly more conservative, so Katniss figured she should shoot for somewhere in the middle ground between what her two closest girl friends suggested.
Her fingers slid quickly on the glass screen, tapping out a quick message.
Close, but no action yet. Survey: Should I move in on him, or would more hinting be better?
Almost immediately, Johanna's response popped up: MAKE THE MOVE, DAMN IT. Shirt off should do it!
Before Katniss could deign to tell Johanna that there was no way in hell she was just whipping her shirt off in the Mellarks' living room, Madge replied: Depends. What do you mean by close?
Katniss bit her lip and glanced at Peeta, whose eyes were still glued to the television. She sighed quietly and quickly tapped out the details.
We were on his bed, pinkies hooked, and I did the mouth thing. He started to lean in, but his dad interrupted us. Then he got all nervous and now we're watching freaking Cake Wars.
Katniss settled back into the arm of the couch as she awaited their reactions. She watched Peeta out of the corner of her eye and had the distinct impression that he was doing the same. Her phone vibrated in her hand and Madge's name popped up: AWWW! That's cute. Sorry about the interruption, though.
Three little dots in the corner of the chat screen told her that Madge was typing again when Johanna's message came through: PINKIES?! Elementary. Grab his junk. That'll get your message across!
Katniss rolled her eyes and replied with a simple: Predictable as ever, Jo.
It sounds like he likes you, but he's nervous to make a move and upset you or risk ruining your friendship. Maybe you should talk to him about it. Tell him how you feel. He would probably appreciate a little straightforwardness.
Her heart pounded in her chest just at the thought of taking Madge's advice. Joking around with Peeta, teasing him, that was one thing. But to talk to him about her feelings, to put herself on the line like that? No way could she possibly do that. When she tried to talk about real matters like her feelings, she always managed to get her words all twisted and screw everything up. Before she could try to explain that to Madge, Johanna did it for her.
You expect Everdeen to talk about her feelings? Come on, get real. She's a woman of action, not of words. Mellark's a dude. No matter how much he may like to talk, I guarantee he'll appreciate a little action.
Katniss thought about it. While Madge probably had a point about Peeta not wanting to ruin their friendship or not being sure how she felt, Johanna's message had some merit to it as well. If Peeta was unsure if she wanted him to kiss her, kissing him first would be the perfect way to get that message across. At the same time, if he was afraid to ruin their friendship, her kissing him would hopefully tell him that she had thought about it and that she wanted it and maybe they shouldn't just be friends anyway!
As she thought it through, Madge texted back: Fine, Jo. But I really don't think she should just rip off her clothes and shove her hand between his legs. That might be coming on a bit strong, don't you think?
She had a point. Not that Katniss had been considering doing that, anyway. Johanna's response didn't surprise her: FINE. Be boring. But I'll have you know, that method has gotten me laid several times. What do you suggest, Miss Proper?
Yeah, Madge, Katniss thought. What do you suggest? At least Johanna was offering advice, as much as Katniss knew she would never follow it. All Madge was doing was shooting her down.
I don't know! Gosh, if you really don't want to talk to him about it, just kiss him. You're right about that, Jo. I'm sure he would appreciate being relieved of the responsibility of making the first move.
Katniss once again saw the three little dots that told her that both Johanna and Madge were typing, but she had a sudden rush of adrenaline that had her typing out a quick reply. Survey says: I'm gonna kiss this fool.
She pressed send and tossed her phone on the couch next to her, heaving a great, loud sigh that had Peeta glancing over at her from the opposite end of the couch.
"Okay?" he asked, watching as she shrugged and scooted closer to him.
"Yeah," she said on another sigh. "Just Madge and Jo being annoying, as usual."
Katniss hesitated for a moment before moving right next to him and throwing her legs over his lap. Her heart was racing and she worried for a moment that he would hear it.
"Oh," he said. For a moment, he looked down at her legs before putting his hands on them nonchalantly. "What's up with them?"
"Eh, nothing, really. Just the usual stuff," she said, her voice catching as Peeta's fingers drifted upwards on her thigh. He glanced up into her face, his cheeks turning slightly pink, as he stilled his hands. Katniss cleared her throat and rested her chin on Peeta's shoulder, staring into his eyes as he turned his head to the side to watch her. Their noses were inches apart; Katniss felt her blood pounding in her ears. "Jo's talking about sex, of course, and Madge is talking about feelings."
"Ah. Two things with which you have no experience. No wonder you're annoyed with them," Peeta teased, hooking his hands around the side of her outer leg and pulling her legs further into his lap.
"I have feelings," Katniss whispered, her heart pounding in her chest as she placed one hand on Peeta's muscular forearm and felt the muscles under his skin jump at the contact. She sent him a ghost of a smile as she trailed her other hand up his arm to rest on the back of his neck, her fingers curling upward into his soft curls.
Peeta opened his mouth to respond, but seemed to lose his train of thought when Katniss started tracing patterns on his skin with the hand on his arm. Katniss smiled and licked her lips when a shudder tore through Peeta's body. His gaze fell to her lips and Katniss took a deep breath.
"Do you really want to watch this?" she asked, her eyes flicking to the TV.
Without taking his eyes off of her, Peeta shook his head. "I can bake circles around these idiots," he said quietly. Katniss didn't think she was imagining his voice taking on a low, seductive tone. In any other circumstance, she would have made fun of him for trying to use his baking skills to seduce a girl, but at the moment, it just made her heart beat faster.
She contemplated waiting for Peeta to do it, to kiss her first, but then she thought back to not even an hour before, how she had been so certain he was going to do it only to be completely let down when he didn't. Her last text to her friends flashed through her mind and she grinned, lunging her upper body forward. Her hands came down from his hair and up from his arm to rest on either side of his square jaw as she laid her lips over his. She was pure adrenaline; her entire body was humming with it.
Peeta grunted in surprise, but met her kiss enthusiastically, molding their mouths firmly together as his left hand came up to cradle the back of her head and pull her closer. His other hand drifted higher up her leg, squeezing her thigh gently.
Katniss pulled back after a moment and opened her eyes to see Peeta's eyelids fluttering open dazedly. She studied his face carefully, not allowing her smile to form past that ghost of a smile Peeta always teased her about in case he didn't enjoy the kiss as much as she had; maybe he thought kissing her was weird. When the left corner of his mouth turned up in his signature shy smile, Katniss grinned, ecstatic, and straddled his lap.
She clasped her hands behind the back of his neck and drew his mouth back up to hers as Peeta's hands came to rest on her waist just above the line of her jeans. Peeta groaned and his grip on her tightened when she took his bottom lip between hers and pulled it into her mouth. When she closed her teeth around the supple flesh, something within him broke.
He turned to the side and pushed her down on the couch so that she was on her back, then covered her body with his, his hips lining up perfectly with hers. When Peeta's tongue pried her lips apart, Katniss opened up to him and had to hold on to his hips to ground herself when he licked his way inside her mouth, eagerly probing and exploring this new and foreign territory. He swept his tongue over the hard ridge near the roof of her mouth and Katniss moaned. Peeta's answering groan shot straight through her mouth to her groin and she whimpered.
She was nothing but sensation now, and all he had done was kiss her. She could only imagine how she would react if they ever had sex. When they had sex, because Katniss was pure confidence at that moment. He felt for her what she felt for him; his kiss said it all. It was utter passion. They would be inseparable after this. He would finally, finally, ask her out. She could laugh with relief if her mouth wasn't otherwise occupied.
Large, warm, gentle hands settled on her wrists, pulling them away from his sides and up above her head before trailing down, down, down her arms, just barely brushing against the sides of her breasts which were humming with nervous, elated, excited energy on their way down her torso to her hips. His hands hooked around the backs of her hips, pulling her up so her knees pointed toward the ceiling, rising over him. Her legs fell open and his hips settled more firmly against hers. When she felt his long, thick hardness against her thigh, she instinctively jerked her hips up toward it. Peeta's head lifted from hers as he inhaled on a long hiss before grinding his erection into her again.
Katniss' brain went fuzzy as a desperate, animalistic sound escaped her. She shifted her hips up again as her hands shot out to grab Peeta by the jaw and yank him back down to her. She wasted no time in probing her way into his mouth. Her tongue swept over the line of his perfectly straight teeth before sliding along his tongue. Peeta closed his lips around her tongue and sucked on her lightly as his hands trailed upwards, brushing the sides of her ass before slipping under the hem of her T-shirt. He stroked his hands along her stomach as his mouth released the pressure on her tongue.
Following the retreat of Katniss' tongue, Peeta laid a series of soft pecks on her lips before he worked his way back into her mouth. He swept his tongue along hers once before he retreated, then entered again to stroke her, retreated and repeated the process over and over. When Katniss realized that his tongue was mimicking and matching the movement of their hips thrusting against each other, a deep, aroused shudder rippled through her body and she thrust her hands up under the back of his shirt, pulling his chest down to hers as a short, high-pitched moan escaped her throat. He was tongue-fucking her mouth.
He pulled his hands out of her shirt and brought them to rest on her chest as his lips left hers and began to trail kisses down her jaw to the side of her neck. He found the spot just below her left ear that made her shudder and mumble nonsensical words and spent several long moments laving attention there before moving on down her neck. He used his lips, tongue and teeth to kiss, lick and nip his way to the dip in her V-neck. His tongue trailed the edge of her shirt before he lifted his head to look at her.
Half out of her mind with need, Katniss placed her hands on Peeta's shoulders and shoved him. Obeying her wordless command, Peeta rose to his knees above her. Katniss leaned up just far enough to catch the hem of her shirt with her hands and pulled it up and over her head. She tossed it over the back of the couch before returning her hands to Peeta's sides, shoving them under his shirt again and giving him a light tug back toward her.
Peeta hesitated for a long second before reaching over his head to grasp the back of his T-shirt and yank it over his head. He tossed it off in the same direction Katniss had tossed hers. He allowed her a moment to admire his toned torso and run her hands along his perpetually warm, pale flesh before he lowered himself back on top of her.
Peeta groaned his relief when they were once again pressed flush to one another, skin to skin, their hips flattening together once more. Katniss turned her head to catch his lips, sinking her teeth into his bottom lip as her hands explored the newly revealed flesh of his back. Peeta lifted his torso away from her to reach his hands between their bodies so he could fondle her cloth-covered breasts and Katniss sighed as she trailed her hands around to the front of him, scratching her short fingernails lightly against the muscled ridges of his abdomen.
"Katniss," Peeta whispered gruffly as he kneaded her breasts through her bra.
"Peeta," she breathed, latching onto his neck with her mouth. She tasted salt on his skin and sank her teeth into the flesh connecting his neck and shoulder. Peeta's hips jerked forward violently in surprise as he groaned and a delicious jolt of energy shot through Katniss' groin to the rest of her body as her breath caught in her throat.
Do that again, she wanted to beg.
Her hands trailed up from his abdomen to rest over his chest, her fingers scraping over his pebbled nipples.
"Katniss," Peeta repeated, lowering his forehead to the couch next to her head.
Katniss realized that he was actually trying to talk to her when he withdrew his hands from her chest. She turned her head to the side to see that his face was deeply flushed and his eyes were shut tight like he was in pain. For a moment, she wondered if he had accidentally reached orgasm and was embarrassed, but his hips were still flush against hers and she could feel his hard, hot desire for her as clearly as she could feel her own slick desire for him pooling between her legs.
She trailed her hands back down his torso to grip his hips as she planted a soft kiss high on his cheekbone. Peeta let his chest collapse down on top of her so that his full weight rested on her and Katniss smiled as he opened his eyes, turning his head to look at her.
"What is this?" he whispered, his eyes displaying his overwhelming lust, but also confusion and something Katniss thought might be fear.
"What do you mean?" she asked softly, stroking his soft blond curls.
"What brought this on?" Peeta asked, his voice barely a whisper as his hands squeezed her waist gently.
Katniss was silent as she thought of how to answer. She could tell him that she had liked him for years and had finally decided that tonight was the night that their relationship had to make the leap from friendship to romance, but she worried that he didn't want to hear that. She searched his eyes, but found no hint at what he wanted her to say, just saw the lust, confusion and that unnerving fear.
She had no clue what to say, so she grinned and resorted to something she would have said when they were just friends, because they were surely more than that now, weren't they?
"I was bored."
Peeta stared at her for a moment before his expression fell. He nodded as he tried to school his features to hide his disappointment, but Katniss' heart constricted and she followed him up as he rose to his knees over her again. Her hands went to his biceps as she tried to steady him over her and keep him from standing, from leaving her.
"Wait. No, I mean…" she didn't know what to say to correct her mistake because she didn't understand why what she had said was so wrong.
Peeta's eyes searched her face before he nodded again and pulled out of her reach, standing and walking around the couch to retrieve their shirts.
He cleared his throat as he held her T-shirt out to her. She looked up into his face, panting not with arousal anymore, but with pure anguish. She didn't know how, but she knew she had just ruined their friendship.
"You should probably get home now," he said softly as he pulled his shirt over his head and made his way towards the stairs without looking at her again. "I'll get your stuff."
Katniss' eyes swam with confused tears as she watched him walk slowly, dejectedly up the stairs. Next to her, her phone vibrated. Numb with shock and confusion, she picked it up and swiped her finger across the screen to pull up her chat with Johanna and Madge, who had continued to text her while she had been making out with Peeta.
OMG. REALLY?!
YES. Finally. Your sexual tension has been affecting us all.
Katniss?
Everdeen. OMG. You're doing it.
KATNISS AND PEETA ARE MAKING OUT YES OMG.
Get it, Everdeen. You dirty little girl.
Y'ALL ARE GONNA GET MARRIED SO HARD.
God, Madge. We're talking about physical connections here, not emotional ones.
Details, Katniss. We need details.
Katniss?
Dude, are y'all boning? This is a long first kiss.
JOHANNA!
You were thinking it, Madge.
Still.
The final message from Johanna, which had just come through, read: But, Everdeen, just for the record, I'm with Madge. WE NEED DETAILS. ASAP.
Katniss stared blankly at her phone, which swam in her vision. Her fingers hovered over the screen, but she had no words to inform them of the disastrous results of her actions, so she clicked the button to lock the screen and stood to shove her phone in her pocket as Peeta's heavy footsteps sounded on his way back down the stairs. She took a deep breath and wiped her hands under her eyes, pulling her shirt on over her head as she went to meet him at the front door.
Thanks for reading, guys! And thanks to everyone who has reviewed, favorited and followed this story so far! I truly appreciate every single one of you. I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. :)
Sorry that the end of this chapter is a bit... angsty. But the category is romance and ANGST. However, have faith in everyone's favorite OTP. They'll get their shit together eventually.
I've been doing some planning and I'm relatively certain that this story will end up with seven chapters (the seventh chapter will probably be an epilogue).
Chapter three should be up within the next few days!
OH! Also, if you could, would some of you let me know how the texting played out for you? Was it easy to understand who was saying what, etc.? Because the next chapter is going to have a bit of texting as well. Thanks, all!
Again, feel free to follow me on tumblr and talk to me! I'm ilikewatchingyousleep.
