"Zhuge! Mr. Zhuge!" Ma Chao yelled.

"What? I'm working-"

"The two gay guys just joined in the charity auction!" Ma Chao shoved the door to Zhuge Liang's study and barged in, his head still wet from hair bleach.

"Sun Ce and Zhou Yu?" Zhuge Liang asked quizzically. "I know. They were one of the first to sign up-"

"No, no, the other gay guys. The ones who were officially out a long time ago-"

Zhuge Liang slammed down his papers. "I don't care what Cao Cao and Xiahou Dun are doing! It doesn't affect-"

"No, no, not them!"

"You cannot be talking about our boss Liu Bei! I am sure to keep him so far in the closet-"

"No! The other gay guys! The super-gay one and-"

"Ma Chao, for the last time, Zhang He is not gay! Do not call him that; it is just politically incorrect-"

"No, I mean Gan Ning and Ling Tong."

Zhuge Liang was silent. "…You could have just said."

"Sorry. Anyways, what are we going to do about it? I won't be beat by a bunch of-"

"Don't say it, Ma Chao! That is unjust to call someone a-" The door slammed open, again, albeitly more self-righteously (as far as a door could be self-righteous) and less dramatically.

"Both of you be quiet!" Zhuge Liang snapped.

"Well, I do not understand what is bad! This is excellent, more famous people helping charity!" Zhao Yun declared happily. "The more the better for the people of this world!"

"But I don't want to be outdone by them!" Ma Chao exclaimed.

"Besides, why are you so worried? It's not like they have a super-rich fanbase no one else has-"

"…Yun, have you ever heard of the pink dollar?" Ma Chao exclaimed.

"Is that like a three dollar bill?"

"No, it is a reference to the buying power of a certain group of a group of the population with high disposable incomes and the willingness to spend it," Zhuge Liang replied.

"Oh. What group?"

"Gay people."

Zhao Yun snorted. "Well, I have the buying power of a certain group of blahblah with high disposable incomes and the willingness to spend it too!" Zhao Yun declared. "Old people!"

Ma Chao stared. "He's got a point."

Zhuge Liang thought for a moment. "It is only a charity auction- I mean, just as long as we participate and stay in the know, we should be okay. Don't worry about who gets the most."

"But-" Ma Chao whined.

"Ma Chao, you're going to leave in your bleach too long. Go wash it out."