Disclaimer: I own neither Glee nor any part thereof. No money is being made off of this story and is intended only for entertainment purposes; therefore it falls within the parameters of "Fair Use"

A/N: Thanks to all those who review, it's very encouraging to know there are actually people who like this stuff I write. The "Favorites/Story Alerts" are also encouraging, although Story Alerts for my Santana story are kind of all for naught. That story is done.

As for this story, sadly you will find no Lady Vampire Kisses here. They were supposed to be here, but the story started writing itself. I'm setting up a few things for future chapters; hopefully this doesn't feel like filler, I promise it's not.

Chapter 2

Patiently Waiting to Explode

Tina had left school excited at the prospects the evening held. She'd overheard the brief conversation between Brittany and Santana before Glee, and Santana seemed to know nothing about Brittany and Tina's evening plans, which quelled most of Tina's fears that this was all some cruel joke that ended with her being humiliated. She knew Brittany, on her own, would never be so purposefully hurtful but she could sometimes get talked into things that she wouldn't normally do when Santana was involved.

When she'd arrived home she quickly set about finishing the little bit of homework she had left from Algebra, then had gone about tidying up her bedroom but Tina kept it pretty clean most of the time so that didn't eat up much time either. She looked at the clock. Shit! 3:45! Brittany won't be here for over two hours. What am I going to do with myself until then?

Tina turned her iTunes on shuffle and picked up her Kindle to try to get lost in reading. She was a little over half way through The Count of Monte Cristo and was, thus far, really enjoying it. The book really had everything, love and passion, intrigue, epic fight scenes, a little bit of social satire. I'm definitely naming my first daughter Haydèe. For fairly obvious reasons, Tina was having trouble concentrating and just couldn't get into it.

She turned on the TV hoping that she'd find something to distract her, but all that was on this early were re-runs of 90's sitcoms and trash talk shows. She knew she would be watching the trash talk shows if she were on the phone with Mercedes. Mercedes! Of course, call Mercedes, talk for hours and Brittany will be here before I know it. OMG! Mercedes, The Count of Monte Cristo. Gotta remember to ask her if she's named after Mercedes Herrera. Tina grabbed her phone and shot off a quick text.

To Mercedes: Cedes, what's up? –T

From Mercedes: Can't talk now, T. Taking Eddie to ER.

To Mercedes: OMG! Is he ok?

From Mercedes: Fell off bed, hit head, seems fine. Moms worried.

From Mercedes: We're here, will txt when we no 4 sure.

To Mercedes: Kthx. *fingers crossed* -T

When no reply came, Tina assumed that Mercedes shut off her phone. I hope Eddie's okay. He's the least obnoxious little brother I've ever met. Wait, Eddie. Mercedes little brother is named Edmond. Guess that clears up where Mercedes' name comes from. Makes sense, Mr. and Mrs. Jones don't really seem the type to name their kid after a car.

Tina thought she would pour through her iTunes library for a song appropriate to their assignment that she and Brittany could do. Crap! What was the assignment? I can't believe I zoned out through all of Glee. At that moment, Tina noticed that her iTunes library had shuffled to "The Girl is On My Mind" by The Black Keys. HA! iTunes has become the soundtrack of my life all the sudden! Okay bite the bullet and get the Glee assignment from Rachel. Just remember, no text-speak.

To Rachel: Don't kill me, but I completely missed the assignment in Glee today. I have a lot on my mind and completely zoned. -T

From Rachel: Funk. –RBB

To Rachel: Like Rick James? George Clinton? Sly Stone? –T

From Rachel: The same. –RBB

To Rachel: I can't do funk? -T

From Rachel: Nor can I, nor do I imagine can Finn, Noah, Kurt, Brittany, Santana, Quinn (although she asserts otherwise), and while I have no clue of the vocal ranges of Mike or Matt, it would seem that the assignment is geared entirely towards Mercedes and Artie. –RBB

To Rachel: That's sort of dumb. –T

From Rachel: It is completely dumb, although, I must say I would have thought you'd be happy for a chance for your boyfriend to take the spotlight. -RBB

To Rachel: Artie's not my boyfriend

Where did that come from all of a sudden?

To Rachel: Or, idk, maybe he still is, but I'm not happy with him at the moment. –T

From Rachel: I'm very sorry to hear that, Tina. I hope things work out between the two of you. –RBB

To Rachel: Thanks for saying, but at this point I'm not even sure I want them to. –T

From Rachel: I'm sorry to hear that as well. –RBB

To Rachel: Thanks. Brittany is suppose to be over soon, she wants to work together on something. Can we skip the funk and maybe work on something for Regionals, Captain? -T

From Rachel: That sounds like the best idea I've heard all day. Are you and Brittany friends? -RBB

To Rachel: Not really, not yet anyway. She just came up to me today after lunch and said she wanted to do this. -T

From Rachel: This isn't some horrible trick to embarrass and humiliate you, is it? -RBB

To Rachel: The thought has crossed my mind, but Santana didn't seem to know anything about it, so I don't think it is. -T

From Brittany: Out of practice, omw home 2 chng and eat, super hungry! Then brt, jerk chicken rulz! -B

From Rachel: I hope, then, for your sake that is true. Brittany seems eminently personable when not under the influence of Santana and/or Coach Sylvester. -RBB

To Brittany: Jerk chicken is crazy awesome, Brit. Enjoy. C u when u get here. -T

To Rachel: I agree. She's about to be on her way over, I should get ready. -T

To Brittany: Do u no where I liv? -T

From Rachel: Have fun. -RBB

To Rachel: Thanks. :) -T

From Brittany: Totally. The big white house on Pine. San wanted 2 tp in 1time. I tot made her promise not 2 –B

To Brittany: I appreciate it. I need to start turning into a vampire now. –T

From Brittany: Awesome! Can't wait! :) -B

Tina made her way out of her room and downstairs. "Mom?"

"Back here, sweetie," she heard her mother's response from the back of the house, most likely her home office. Tina made her way back to the source.

"Hey, Mom, working on anything interesting?

"It's tax law, honey, there's nothing interesting about it."

I'm the daughter of a Jewish tax lawyer and an Asian CPA, there's a horribly racist joke in there if one were so inclined to make it. Speaking of which, Santana is never meeting my parents. "My friend Brittany, from Glee Club, is going to come by this evening. We're working on a song for showcase at Regionals."

"Do I know Brittany?"

"No, I don't think so. I mean, you might have seen her at Sectionals," Tina responded, "Tall, pretty, blonde, phenomenal dancer."

Naomi Cohen looked like she was trying to recall the girl, but seemingly came up empty, "Doesn't ring a bell, but it's fine, I trust your judgment in friends. I already left some cash on the kitchen counter; you girls order a pizza or get some takeout," Naomi said. "Don't cook," she added with a smirk.

"No worries on that front, Mom. After last time, I'm pretty sure I'm not cooking again ever. Thanks for the money," Tina said as she walked out of her mother's office.

"Tina," Naomi called after her.

Reappearing in the doorway she said, "Yeah, Mom?"

"I feel compelled as your mother to remind you that we're trusting you in the house, unsupervised, with someone we don't know. We expect you to behave appropriately."

"Oh my God, Mom, Brittany is just a friend, I'm not gay." It's about time I actually spit that out. The effect of it is somewhat lessened by knowing that I am currently scheming… yeah, scheming is definitely an appropriate word for it at this point… scheming to spend most of the evening making out with the hottest girl in school. Whoa! Most of the evening? Hottest girl in school? Where did these phrases come from?

"Yyyyeahhhh," Naomi started, "see, I actually meant don't throw a party." Crap. "However, seeing as you brought it up, don't get yourself into a physical situation that you aren't emotionally ready to deal with, either. Your sexuality isn't at issue, being able to deal with and fully understand your sexuality is."

Tina, thoroughly embarrassed, eyes firmly planted on her shoes, said, "Don'thavesexwithBrittanygotit."

"Don't do anything you aren't comfortable doing," Naomi corrected, "Now before I kill you with embarrassment, will you please go upstairs and tell your father that if we don't leave in the next ten minutes, we're going to be late."

"Anything to be able to walk out of this room right now," she said, doing exactly that.

Half an hour later, Tina had settled on wearing a three quarter length velvet halter dress, black with dark violet accents, which she had bought several months ago but hadn't had the occasion, or the courage, to actually wear yet with fishnet stockings and calf length steel-toed boots. Elbow length black arm warmers helped her deal with the bare shoulders and arms that she wasn't sure she was 100% okay with. She also had her cloak that she'd worn to her encounter with Principal Figgins that had touched off this whole vampire thing, but she needed to get her fangs in first, and they simply were no co-operating. Then the doorbell rang. "One second!" Tina yelled.

Approximately one second later, the doorbell rang again. Yep, definitely Brittany. "I'll be right there, Brit!" she yelled again. She returned the uncooperative fang to its box for the time being, walked out of her room, down the stairs to the front door, and opened it. As soon as she did, her jaw dropped open. Tina was definitely not use to seeing Brittany out of her Cheerios uniform or their Glee costumes. At present, her blonde hair was down and loose, she was wearing a very tight, sleeveless, black Usher t-shirt, gray skinny jeans and black high heeled boots. Did I say hottest girl in school? I think I meant hottest girl in the state. I may not be gay, but I'm pretty sure I'm gay for Brittany.