Alright, let's see where this story goes. I'm bumping the rating up to M due to this story dealing with sexual assault and wanting to do that justice.
As well, these types of issues are all handled differently by different people. Everyone heals in their own way. For this story, I'm pulling from my experience with therapy, assault, self-harm and other topics because that is what I know and understand.
The trigger warnings in the first chapter apply for the rest of this story, and I will add others as we go if needed. If you feel I neglect giving trigger warnings at any point, PLEASE tell me. I have plenty of experience with them not being provided and know what that can do.
When the car finally shut off, Lightning had quiet. Fang fumbled about the interior, grabbing her wallet and keys. She turned to Lightning, "Ready?"
She nodded and the two women stepped out of the car.
Downtown Bodhum was hardly a metropolis. It was quaint, not too small, but still held style. Lebreau's bar was no different. The pair walked around from the back towards the front of the building. It was still the afternoon, so the bright neon sign wasn't as vibrant yet. Lightning did a double take. The word 'Lebreau's' looked like it was off completely.
"One of the things I've been tasked with fixing," Fang remarked, seeing her look. "First I gotta talk to 'Breau, c'mon."
The duo walked into the bar. Three patrons sat individually across the room. They were all quiet, sipping their drinks in peace. The only sound in the room was a quiet hum coming from Lebreau as she cleaned the bar with a wet rag.
Lightning had always liked the place. She wasn't one for drinking often, but Lebreau's wasn't some dingy, dirty establishment. It was clean and spacious, the tables not too close together and a lack of grime throughout the room.
"Hey, Fang," Lebreau said, scarcely looking up. "Oh, hey, Lightning. To what do I owe the pleasure?" The woman set the rag down and wiped her hands on her pants.
"She's just here to keep me company while I do that maintenance. Still want me to do the sign first?" Fang asked, walking around the bar and grabbing a hefty red toolbox.
Lebreau nodded. "That'd be best, I want that working by tonight. I left the ladder around the side for you. After that you can look at the lights in the back."
"Yes, ma'am!" Fang saluted.
"Light, you make sure she's productive." Lebreau winked at Lightning.
Lightning rolled her eyes and spoke softly, "I don't think anyone can keep her in check."
Lebreau laughed while Fang mocked a horrified look. Lebreau picked the rag back up while Fang gestured for Lightning to follow her.
Outside, Lightning sat down against the building wall. Fang went to grab the ladder.
"What did you feel when you cut yourself?" Rygdea's voice echoed in her mind. She'd always liked how his voice was soft during their sessions. It was soothing.
"That I deserved it." Her response had made him frown.
"Mind holding the ladder while I go up?" Fang said, bringing Lightning back to the present.
"Sure," Lightning said. She waited for Fang to go up, then grabbed each side of the ladder and held it steady. Fang climbed up with a few tools in her hands.
Lightning looked up and watched her. She has a nice ass, Lightning thought idly.
She blinked, and saw Jihl on that ladder instead of Fang. Her head turned down towards Lightning, lips curling into that possessive smirk she wore when looking at her.
"Light?" Fang said.
Lightning's hand began to tremble. She tapped a finger against the ladder rapidly, a small outlet for the shaking. Jihl looked at her just like that since the moment they met to the last time they had seen each other.
"Sunshine?"
"What are you doing, staring at my ass like that?" Jihl purred. "Claire, come show me how much you like it."
"Lightning!" Fang nearly shouted.
Lightning's hand clenched the ladder and she screwed her eyes shut. "Yes?" she whispered.
Footsteps descended down the ladder. Lightning felt skin brush against hers leaving goosebumps in its wake. She shuddered, trying to step away.
Hands clasped firmly on her shoulders, holding her in place, and Lightning opened her eyes. But it wasn't Jihl Nabaat's eyes piercing into her, it was Fang's warm eyes filled with concern.
"Light," Fang said, unsure of the very words she was speaking, "are you okay?"
"Yes," Lightning said too quickly. She stood absolutely still, tremors running through her hands all that disrupted it.
"Light, are you sure?" Fang asked, voice coated in concern.
"Please let go of me," Lightning begged, her hands beginning to shake uncontrollably.
Fang's hands left her shoulders and Lightning ran inside Lebreau's. The woman herself looked up and called out Lightning's name, but went ignored.
She burst into the bathroom and bolted the door behind her. For a moment, she breathed. Her trembling hands didn't cease. Lightning clenched them until her finger nails dug into her skin.
"Lightning?" Fang's muffled voice came through the door.
"Lightning?" taunted the memory of Jihl.
The nob jiggled, but the locked door gave no entry. Fang pounded her fist on it.
She turned to the white sink and turned the water on hot. Her hands gripped each side of the sink hard as steam began to rise from the sink.
Lightning plunged her hands into the scalding water.
It burned. It burned so fucking much.
She cried out, but didn't withdraw her hands. Lightning saw the skin turning red and she grit her teeth in pain.
A soft pounding broke through her state. She looked at the door and heard the pounding louder. Fang.
Her hands felt numb. She reached and shut the sink off. The trembling subsided and she reached for the door. She twisted the knob so it unlocked, but didn't open.
The door slowly pushed open, a worried Fang appearing in the gap. "Light…?"
"Can you just…take me home?" Lightning asked, her voice soft. She rubbed her red hands, flinching in pain.
"Yeah," Fang said. She looked like she wanted to say more, but couldn't find the words.
Lightning didn't care. She just wanted to be home.
When Snow stepped out of the shower, he frowned upon seeing Lightning's bedroom door closed. It hadn't been like that when he got into the bathroom.
The big man tossed a shirt on and brushed his still damp hair out of his eyes before knocking on the door lightly. "Sis?"
"Yeah?" croaked Lightning's voice.
"Can I come in?"
She said nothing. Snow slowly eased the door open, offering her time to say no. When she didn't say anything, he stepped in.
His sister was curled into a ball beneath the covers on her bed. Her hair was ragged, a mess cascading across pillows. Her eyes were closed, but Snow didn't fool himself into thinking she didn't know exactly where he was standing. She had been a soldier and damn good at it.
"Rough day?" he asked. He sat down on the floor, leaning against the bed, back to Lighting.
"I don't want to talk about it." Her response was blunt, as they usually were with him.
He twisted his wedding ring idly around his finger, a habit he'd picked up since marrying Serah. "You sure? I've always found that having someone to listen can help."
Snow could feel her eyes piercing holes into the back of his head. "What would you know about it?"
"Have I ever told you about my dad?" he asked instead of answering.
Lightning was silent. Snow continued.
"I was an orphan, sure, but I remember having a dad." Snow kept twisting the ring, giving his hands something to do. "He was as big as me, I think. I was just a kid though, so everyone seemed big. But that's all I remember of him," he lied, his hands briefly pausing with the ring.
"Gadot, Lebreau, Yuj, Maqui…none of them could remember their parents. They said I was lucky, but I always thought they were the lucky ones. I had a father I could remember and hate for leaving me. That meant I had of stuff on my mind. Stuff that I couldn't keep bottled up."
Snow turned his head so Lightning was in the corner of his eye. "I know you still deep down don't think I'm good enough for Serah. You're probably right, though I don't think anyone is good enough for someone perfect like her. What I'm trying to say is that I'm willing to listen if you want to talk. I'm not Rygdea, but I can listen."
He stood up and walked to the door. Snow looked back over his shoulder and saw his sister not looking at him. She looked in thought.
"I'll be downstairs if you change your mind," Snow said.
He opened the door and exited the room, heading downstairs. He still had some paperwork to finish up from his morning training recruits with the Guardian Corps.
Snatching a folder from his bag, he set it on the table. He sighed, sitting down and clicking his pen. He loved his job, but the paperwork was certainly not the highlight of his day.
A footstep caught his attention. He looked to his left, seeing Lightning standing at the base of the stairs, wrapped in a blanket. She hesitated, looking unsure.
Snow smiled, and gestured to the seat across from him at the table.
Lightning moved forward and took it.
Author Notes: Don't expect super frequent updates. I'll be sticking to short(ish) chapters more often than not, around about this length, just because that's easiest with my life right now.
