Title: Steering Wheel
Date: 31 October, 2008
Words: 512
Characters: Renji and Hisagi
Pairings: Implied Hitsu/Matsu? Otherwise none.
Inspiration: A robot Chicken clip I saw only a few hours ago.
Rating: PG or K+
A/N: I used the Pirate Ship scene from my story "Child Rearing: 101" for the setting. It's around the middle of Chapter 11 for anyone curious. And I apologize, because I think Hisagi is a little OOC, but I honestly don't know how to fix that. Any suggestions welcome!!
Renji and Hisagi stood on the bow of the replica pirate ship in the tenth division courtyard, trying to affix the steering wheel. If Yachiru was going to drive the thing, she had to have someway to steer. At least that was what Matsumoto said. Hisagi and Renji wondered, not for the first time that day, how Matsumoto had convinced Hitsugaya to let Yachiru stay with them while Zaraki, Ikkaku, and Yumichika were out.
Hisagi was currently fitting the pieces of the wheel together, not paying much mind to the menial task. Renji looked up, and noticing the precarious position Hisagi held the wheel in, devised a plan. He told himself later that he should have known better.
Renji relayed his message to Hisagi, who gaped at him in astonishment at the ludicrousness of the suggestion. Renji realized things wouldn't work as smoothly as he hoped, and decided to up the ante.
"5,000 yen says you can't do it," Renji waved a few bills from the living world in Hisagi's face, "And you know money in the living world goes a lot further than it does here. Just think, we could drink for a week straight…"
"Hardly, more like a day or so," Hisagi corrected, looking embarrassed for even considering Renji's proposal. "And I refuse. I will not embarrass myself in front of Rangiku-chan like that. She'd kill me, and if she doesn't and Hitsugaya taicho finds out…" Hisagi trailed off, gulping nervously.
"Are you scared?" Renji challenged.
"Hell no!" Hisagi returned. "But, 5,000 yen isn't nearly enough."
"Okay, 10,000 then," Renji threw back. Hisagi paused for a moment, seriously considering.
"I could party for a couple of days on that…" he mused, "I'll do it. Now, you get to borrow her scarf." Renji grimaced but obliged. At least Hisagi was the one going to get the blame for this.
oOoOoOoOoOo
"Oi, Rangiku-chan!" Hisagi and Renji called out in unison. She turned from her spot on the deck to face the men, looking confusedly at Hisagi. Renji beckoned her toward them, and she proceeded.
As she drew near, she got a good look at the exact situation. Hisagi had taken her scarf, wrapped it around his waist, and tied either end to opposite sides of the ship's steering wheel. She was slightly appalled at the idea, and made a mental note to have her scarf cleaned before she wore it again.
Unknowingly falling into their setup, she asked, "Hisagi, what's with the steering wheel?" She quirked an eyebrow and carried a curious look on her face as she waited for an answer.
Playing up the pirate theme, he responded, "Ar, matey, it's driving me nuts!!"
Matsumoto giggled happily, commenting on the funniness f the crude humor before suddenly composing and straightening her stance. Alerted by the abrupt change of behavior, Renji and Hisagi started to take a step back. Before either could move, however, she slapped them both hard across the face. Hisagi and Renji looked affronted and worried.
"What was that for, Ran-chan?" asked Renji, pouting.
"That's for using my scarf."
