2. Ready to Let Go? Maybe Not.

Disclaimer: I, to my great distress, do not own the BJT or any of it's companions. Those are Anne Bishop's. I just borrowed her genius and added charries of my own.

Jaenelle exploded into laughter when Surreal related the incident with the spiders to the coven the next day.

"Mother Night, I remember when Daemonar was that age!" Marian said, wiping her eyes, still giggling. "Lucivar tried so hard to get rid of any nasties he and the wolf pups brought in, but I knew."

"Rainier tries," Surreal admitted. "But he still can't hide everything and ever since those kittens decided Raeyen was theirs…it's been complete chaos."

"Kiernan is determined to try out his Jewels every chance he gets," Jaenelle said, rolling her eyes. "I've considered taking them away, just to get some peace!"

"It's won't work," Gabrielle informed her. "I tried that with Devon. Believe me, they always find a way to either get tem back, or get back at us."

"Thank the Darkness I have no idea what you guys mean by this," Karla joked, pulling a face.

"Brat," Jaenelle said lovingly, patting her friend's arm. "You got your daughter ready made, already through the early years."

""That, and Della only wears the Yellow," Karla informed her, smugly. "No way can she get into the kind of trouble we did."

"True," Jaenelle agreed. "But, Papa always says it was because there were ten of us that there was always complete chaos in the Hall." Her sapphire eyes sparkled as she remembered.

Surreal shifted uncomfortably as Jaenelle, Karla and Gabrielle started talking about the adventures of the past. Despite having been a part of the SaDiablo family for over fifteen years, she was still uncomfortable when the coven spoke of their teenage years. She couldn't relate to their experiences. Men, sex, children and weapons, those were topics she could easily talk about. But while the coven, age sixteen, had been exploding kitchens and painting walls with demon dead, at the same age Surreal had been learning how to be a professional whore and getting lessons on death from the Sadist.

She caught Marian's eye and the hearth witch gave her a warm smile. Marian could relate to Surreal's unease. She had been verbally and physically abused by her family before her father had tried to use her to pay off his gambling debts. Jaenelle and Saetan had taken care of the Warlords who had tried to rape her and Marian had been Lucivar's housekeeper before they married.

Surreal knew the details of the life of each woman in the room, just as they know every detail of her life before she had come to Kaeleer, how she had whored and killed to survive. And the most amazing part, at least to her, they didn't care.

"Surreal, when's Raeyen's Birthright Ceremony?" Jaenelle asked suddenly. Surreal felt a rush of panic.

Motherhood was nothing like she had imagined it would be. She had thought she would resent a child for disrupting her life, but from the first moment she had held Raeyen, still wet from the birth, she had loved her daughter. It still amazed her how much she loved her. But, hellsfire, she wasn't ready to give up her baby!

"I…well…I…" she stuttered, flushing when everyone turned to look at her. "I…hadn't thought about it."

"It's hard, letting your firstborn go," Gabrielle said gently, reaching out to pat her knee. "It's hard with all of them, but your firstborn…" She paused. Everyone, even Karla, murmured their agreement. "But don't worry, Raeyen will still be the same, mischievous little brat she has always been. And once it's done, you'll know exactly how much trouble she'll be capable of!"

Everyone laughed, but Surreal's laughter quickly faded. Was she ready to let her baby go? She didn't know if she could answer that question.