Hogwarts Rejection Letters
Disclaimer & Author's Note: I do not own Harry Potter, the world of Harry Potter, or any and all official characters from the Harry Potter series itself. J.K Rowling, the woman behind the series, owns this genre, along with other companies and whatnot that help make this series enjoyable in the world. I also do not own ANY other characters from whatever manga, anime, video game, TV series, or movies that emerge in these various two-sided coin chapters. All I own is any of my usual Original Characters that may popup, and whatever else I create out of the figment of my imagination.
This is inspired from Hogwarts Rejection Letters written by Midnighter 13. Of course... mine is slightly different from Midnighter; each chapter not only HAS the rejection letter, but it comes with its own short little oneshot of the reactions to the letter. Some are long, others short.
For this one... it's... odd.
And one more thing:
Dear Dumbledork,
My hot smoking grandma still at the age of twenty, Lina Inverse, tells me about your racist and bigoted world and how you refuse to accept the nineteenth century, and are horribly ignorant of the twentieth century. So, until your society decides to stop being such ignorant pussies, I refuse to step foot into YOUR messed-up society, much less that realm.
Harry Inverse
P.S.
I refuse the name Potter, and I no longer see that horrid bitch Petunia and her fat-ass husband and son as my blood of kin.
And one more thing, Dumbledork:
Kaboom
=0=0=0=0=
Dumbledore sets the letter down, his eyes no longer twinkling. Instead, they were expressing curiosity.
"Kaboom?"
Dumbledore's office and most of the tower exploded. The Elder Wand was destroyed, along with the Cloak of Invisibility, Fawkes somehow, against all impossible odds from the very gods and goddesses above and below the various planes of existences, survived. Also to survive was issues of Playwitch magazines within a now ruined platinum safe. The past portraits of the previous Headmasters of the school didn't survive or escape in time, however.
In another universe, Harry and Lina high-fived each other upon the mirror orb breaking when the Solar Bomb spell detonated off the letter. Behind them, Sirius (who had been broken out from Azkaban) and Remus (cured of his werewolf problem and it is now his cuddly furry Animagus form) were sunbathing in nothing more than black and white speedos, while being surrounded by a bunch of cute sexy women in skimpy bikinis on that quiet island beach (they were cooing over the two lucky men).
Off in the distance, ten year old Luna Lovegood (who for some reason stripped out of her bikini) could be seen chasing after a Crumple-horned Snorkack (trying to outrun her aloof hyperness) with a large fishing net while her father and still-surviving mother act lovey-dovey.
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WARNING: Remus and Sirius in speedos.
