Authors Note: This chapter is almost entirely back-story. It's allot of catching up on what has happened and it really let's the reader know about Christian's and Belle's relationship. Most of the text is centered on a flashback; I'm not going to do anything special with it. I'm sure you can basically figure out when he is talking about his past and when he is talking about the present. If you have any confusion... e-mail me and I'll explain... or you could just throw rotten vegetables...
"Sono col bambino, il mio amore" means "I am with child, my love"
"Oh il Padre, che l'arte nel cielo, santifi e il tua nome"means "Oh Father who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name"
I actually don't know what the Latin one means, something about a sleeping dragon. To all those who can actually speak Italian or Latin and have discovered that well... I suck... Ummmm it's just a story and I elect to be ignorant. But enjoy anyways.
Revised Authors Note May 1, 2010: Okay this is the new and improved version of this chapter. After reading through the original I realized that the whole thing was a little barf-worthy. If you don't agree with that then I appreciate you more then you will ever know. BUT I understand that when the very author of the work doesn't want to read their masterpiece, something needs to change. I had allot of trouble trying to decide if my revisions were a good idea. I mean it is the second chapter of the story. I hope new readers won't be totally offended by this chapter. I happen to find it really humorous and allot more realistic. A relationship people can understand and relate to. If not see a little of the movie Belle and Prince in my writing. I did try. Most of the dialogue has changed and some of the sentence structure in the beginning has been revised. I hope I'll get some feedback over it. Enjoy and review.
Chapter Two: Memories of Sophia-Belle
Christian Aiden Constantine Montengio Beaumont of the house of D'Roseienne had a regal quality about him that he could never quite get rid of, try as he might. He was something of a complicated man and he carried the weight of a past he both loved and regretted. By nature, Christian was poetic. Unfortunately, those who did not know him well would not have guessed this characteristic in him. For the most part, people simply saw Christian the King who happened to have a temper to rival that of Zeus. And most people would choose the thunderbolt over Christian's fury. Yet, thankfully to all, he did not lose it often. He had learned very early in his youth the repercussions of being angry with people who didn't deserve it and saying he learned the hard way was an understatement.
At the moment he was feeling his age. His joints were taking a long time to loosen and he could feel the beginnings of arthritis in his hands. He wasn't ready to be old and he sulked over the whole affair often when he thought no one would notice. This one musing was what was keeping our King's mind off what he didn't want to actually think about. He had saddled his energetic filly in record time and without hesitation the girl had plunged into the cool air of the early morning. It was only a matter of moments before she found her footing completely and was at a full scale run. Christian's heart leapt for moment and lifted for the first time in weeks from his boots and into its rightful place inside his chest. He was exhilarated to be running this fast and urged the horse harder in her strong gait. Finding it very easy to become one with this horse, he allowed his mind to clear with every hoof beat that pounded the soft, wet ground.
Almost a half hour went by as they ran together like this. Christian urged her into a soft trot when they finally eased over the last hill that led into his orchards. She slowed and snorted heavily through her nose, attempting to force him over to the trees that she was sure held fruit for her to pluck at. Taking a long look around him, Christian sighed heavily at the view of his fruit trees. It was a pitiful sight to behold and he looked longingly as his rows and rows of apples, peaches, figs, pears, plums, and dates stood withered and dry. They held very little fruit and their leaves were nothing but a pasty green that turned your stomach sour to look at. Despite the fact that they were coming upon peek harvest season it was the simple truth that his orchard would die soon if it did not rain.
Christian was the king of France. He had been so for almost seventeen years after taking the throne back from his cousin who had ruled the land for ten years prior. He had been a young man of twenty-one then, newly married, and as ignorant as a child but in time the make-shift government that had been created in his absence handed the throne over to the rightful heir. The people had not accepted him at first. His cousin and the eight chancellors that had served as advisors to the king oppressed them and they were taxed mercilessly. But many remembered Christian's tyrannical father and knew whom they would prefer.
And then they had met Belle. Belle was the Prince- turned- King's new bride that had popped up almost as suddenly as he had. And she was beautiful. Stories of her spread across the land in waves and hundreds came from miles around to witness the Goddess that their new king had taken to wife. Little did they know that underneath all her diamonds and pearls Belle was nothing more then a ruined merchant turned inventor/farmers daughter. She came from a small village outside a forest near the borders of France. But that was what Christian loved most about her. He knew that no matter how many fancy balls he escorted her to she was genuine, untainted by royalty and all the evil that comes with it.
Except that even then Christian had known that no one from the peasants to the Pope would allow their king to be married to the offspring of what many considered the village idiot. That is, if Christian hadn't had the most intelligent and trustworthy advisors in the world. A man by the name of Cornelius Cogsworth was the one to give the most credit to. He had known Christian's mother when she was a child bride and had been witness to Christian's birth. He had lived in the castle a good long time and had been a bearer in the burdens his master had been given for ten long years.
And Cogsworth would have been damned if he would have allowed some riffraff to force apart the girl that had saved his master's life. And so in an event completely uncharacteristic of Cogsworth he had broken the rules and wrote up fake pedigree charts of a long lost cousin who was noble by some far stretch of the imagination. With "official" papers to wave in everyone's face people accepted her with open arms.
If only that was the end to this story and they had lived happily ever after. But you see in real stories, there are no such things as happy endings because things never end. They only begin again. And here we are to begin again.
Christian sat on his horse for a very long while. He thought about a great many things as he nudged her into a walk down the path to an apple tree were he finally dismounted and sat down leaning his head against the trunk and closed his eyes. His filly sniffed at his neck and blew snot into his face but then became disinterested and began to graze slowly on the dry grass. He looked to his horse and with an amused grin realized that he had not named her yet. She was beautiful. A thoroughbred Arabian, the color of wheat and gold, she had a bad habit of biting people's heels when they walked past and breaking free from her stall to eat Christian's roses, which were the only thing in his gardens that did not look long since dead. Chuckling to himself Christian now knew exactly what to call his little horse for she reminded him of the second love of his life. That would be his daughter Sophia-Belle……
It wasn't yet sixteen years ago. He remembered everything in perfect detail. He had been sitting in the library. It was a cold Sunday afternoon. They had been at mass and Christian was trying to escape the turmoil his country was in after it had been delivered to him. There were riots in the streets, people were starving to death and penniless from the massive taxation that had run ramped for the past ten years. He was not equipped at the time to care for the entire population of France and so he had run to the safest place he knew. The library. He remembered that he was trying to learn to read as well as study three different languages at once because in order to run his country, he would first have to understand what half the documentation was actually saying and most of it was in Latin.
"Profundus in quietis nox noctis , Extraho somnus in raptor tumulosus iugum". He could read it but it just didn't make sense to him. He tried to sound the letters out as Belle had taught him. "Profun...Pro... Profundus in quietis nox noc...noctis, Ex...Ex... Ex..."
He stopped as a scent reached his nose. She had been standing near him for almost five minutes and his brain had not registered her there for the frustration he had been under.
"I would like to be alone right now." He said aloud to her standing behind him.
"And I would like to be with you right now" She replied before materializing out from behind a shelf of books. It had been at a time when he was still so in awe of her beauty that he had trouble looking at her steadily.
"What word are you having trouble with?" She asked soothingly as she inched towards him. He threw down his quill, knowing he couldn't bring himself to send her away.
"I don't want to study Latin anymore" He replied childishly. Stretching his bare feet out onto the soft carpet, he pushed the books away from him and turned his eyes away as if to say the subject closed. If truth were told, he had wanted her to be there, helping him. But pride had grown over the tender spots and his stubborn nature, regardless of any life lessons he had learned, was coming on full strength.
"Alright then" she replied, easing herself into a chair next to him. "Then we shall study Italian". She opened a book and placed it in front of him. Pointing to a sentence in the middle of the text she smiled warmly. Patient as ever and very much in love with this man, childish as he may be, she would not be perturbed by his temperamental nature.
"Oh il Padre, che l'arte nel cielo, santificato è il tua nome."
He looked at the sentence a long moment. It looked like something he should know, he knew that he should know it. "Oh il Padre..." He stopped, feeling foolish "Oh il Padre, Che l'arte nel ci...cielo, san...san...san..."
"Santificato" she encouraged. He couldn't help it. He felt so discouraged with himself for not understanding these words that he slammed the book shut again, nearly missing her fingers.
"Belle, this is stupid! I don't want to be prompted like a little child!"
She looked at him for a long time as he sat there trying to stare her down, though he knew he would lose. In reality he was starting to not care. What was the point anymore anyways? Who did he really think he was fooling? Deep down he was a fraud and he knew it. A king who couldn't read, or speak any languages aside from his own? One who couldn't hardly communicate his thoughts in public let alone carry on long conversations with members of the royal class? And he didn't even want to discuss the embarrassing fact that he had a great amount of trouble eating without dropping food on himself or spilling something. He had decided that he was a failure and nothing she said was going to change his mind. Or so he thought.
As slow as the ages she reached out her hands and took both his in hers.
"Translate for me. Lei è più intelligente poi lei pensa."
She could see his mind working, for a moment he didn't speak then with halting speech he finally said, "'You...you are smarter then you think'".
"L'amo molto"
"'I love you very much'" Christian paused for a moment and then whispered softly "I love you too."
Belle nodded and then continued. "Non rinunciare a te stesso. Per io non farà mai."
"'Do not give up on yourself. For I never will.'"
She smiled at him assuredly and then tenderly leaned over and kissed his hands. The touch of her moist lips caused shivers to rise up and down his spine. He looked at her longingly and then, defeated, laid his head on their tangled fingers. It was a long while before anyone spoke. There seemed to be an awful gloom between the two of them. Finally she broke through it.
"Sono col bambino, il mio amore".
It was spoken in the softest of whispers that he was sure he had not heard her correctly. He blinked several times "Wait, I think you said that wrong. 'Bambino' is child"
She was silent and he strained his ears to hear her correct herself but she never did. Christian blinked again, his face still cupped by their conjoined hands. He had forgotten how to breath and quite suddenly the pit of his stomach plummeted. He jerked his head up suddenly and searched her face frantically.
"What are you saying?" he finally uttered.
"Christian, I've known for a month. I knew you would be afraid but it's going to be alright" He felt his knees turn into liquid but even then he tried to stand up. His chair clattered to the floor behind him. He opened his mouth several times but could not manage to say anything.
His world was spinning around him and he couldn't even make himself fight the struggle; he simply stood there. She rose from her chair slowly. It wasn't that she had thought this was the wrong time; it was simply the fact that she had run out of time. No matter when she had told him, she knew that he could react this way and so she stood still, allowing him to digest her words. He shook his head hard as if this would somehow change her mind about the truth she had just confirmed to him.
Belle frowned, not liking this. She didn't like his reaction one bit and had absolutely no idea how to calm his sudden trembling anxiety. His face had become a strange pale color and it made his wild blue eyes seem that much more animalistic. In some ways she had expected him to react with a little trepidation but this response to her revelation was far more dramatic then she had anticipated. She watched with a mixture of disappointment and fear as her husband attempted to stumble away from the table.
"I... I think I need a drink!" he said as he turned himself about face. But it wasn't more then a few steps before he crashed into the bookshelf she had been hiding behind only a few minutes before. Books came cascading down all around him, knocking him in the shoulders and in the back of his head. It was pitiful as she watched her lover sink himself to his knees and attempt to retrieve the lost books as he continued to hold his breath with a look of stark panic across his face. "I am so sorry, I'm sorry…" He mumbled, though to whom, Belle wasn't quite sure.
Shaking her head worriedly, she rushed across the floor to him and sank to her own knees. He attempted to push her comforting hands away from himself but this only made her more determined and she forcefully took his face in her hands. He gritted his teeth painfully together and seemed to see everything in the room but her. His eyes darted from the door, to the table where he had been sitting, to the floor where the books lay. Pulling his face so that it was directly on front of her she gave him a total of ten seconds before she shook his face in her hands gently.
"Christian…." She said hopping to knock him out of his self-inflicting suffocation. "Christian breath! Christian, let out your breath!"
Raising his chin up, he exhaled loudly, blowing the little hairs around her temples out of her face. He choked a little before he caught his voice again which sounded strangled and a bit out of place
"Belle! Please tell me you are having a lovely joke! You cannot be serious about this."
Belle furrowed her brow at this, showing him she did not care for the assumption.
"Christian, I would never joke about something like this. That would be a horrible thing to do!"
He inhaled and exhaled quickly, scrambling for clarity amidst his racing thoughts.
"But…But…How? How did this happen?!"
She tilted her head downwards slightly and gave him such a look full of meaning that he closed his eyes dramatically and let his shoulders sag a little.
"Alright, I know how, but…are you very certain?"
Belle nodded her head looked away for a moment before returning to her answer. "I called the physician into our room a few weeks ago. When…When I really thought I might be."
Christian opened his mouth and let it hang there for a moment. "You saw Claude without me? You didn't even tell me but you spoke to him?" He sounded so hurt and injured that Belle had to curb the desire to smile at the pouty way he wouldn't look at her. As if she had betrayed him somehow.
"Dearest, when would you have found time? With everything you have been doing the last six months I am surprised they give you time to eat. I couldn't bother you with something I wasn't even sure about. Give you more needless things to worry over."
Christian glared at the ground, clutching his hands into fists and pressing them into the floor. "Well, it is quite obvious that somewhere in there I found enough time, in the last six months, to make a right mess of our lives!" He jerked his head up and looked at her with a mixture of pleading and anguish. "Belle…I just don't understand! I was not even trying to put a child into you! I thought I was being so careful not to."
Without looking at his sad, round eyes she looked out at the corner of her vision to try and make her next statement come out tactfully.
"Maybe at first you were…but…lately…" She paused for a moment. "But…lately, well… I am actually quite surprised we did not start a baby sooner…with…well…with the way you have been…."
She trailed off, unable to finish her sentence. They both felt a little uncomfortable when speaking of their coupling aloud and neither wanted to fill in the unfinished words. Christian's mind flew over the past six months and he realized the truthfulness in her revelation. He had been covered in anxiety since the day he had transformed back into himself. Every day he was attacked with some new problem, months and months spent in studies and classes to bring him to a point where he could govern his country. A country he had to fight to have returned to him from his cousin who wasn't all that happy to give it up. Day after day, hour after hour, he was put through his paces, becoming more and more what they wanted him to be. So it really shouldn't have made anyone wonder that when he was finally released from his duties as king the only thing he wanted to do was find his new bride and spend as much time as he could with her until they drug him away again. When one's day is filled to the brim with a thousand different words that tend to mean almost nothing to the speaker the last thing one wants to do is talk more. He didn't want to communicate with words when he was finally with Belle and so he didn't. He loved her and made love to her and if he tended to take out some of his frustrations of his busy life in their bed with her, well, he hadn't really thought much of it until now. What had seemed like beautiful memories of love manifested physically now looked like a horrible affront to his morals. He had been such a fool and he knew it.
Burying his the heel of his hands into his eyes he moaned softly and tried to block out his stupidity. "Oh God! You are right! Oh, how could I have become such a cad! I have turned into Lumiere who has no self control to speak of!"
Belle immediately slapped a hand over her mouth in an attempt to cover the laugh that was bubbling to the surface. Christian didn't seem to notice or else he mistook her widened eyes for disgust in him. His own grew rounder and he looked at Belle as a puppy would when being scolded.
"I should have listened to him, you know. He tried to tell me all kinds of disturbing things one can do to keep a girl from conceiving a child and I should have believed him. He would know too. The filthy bugger!"
He muttered the last part under his breath as if somehow he could pin this whole situation on his butler and somehow take the blame off of himself.
Belle removed her hand from her mouth, still battling her smile from emerging and looked at her husband curiously.
"When did he try to tell you those things?"
"The night before our wedding." Christian answered with a hint of disgust in his voice. "It was awful! Those two fools forced me into a chair--"
"Who?"
"Cogsworth and Lumiere of course. They told me it was customary to discuss the facts of being married to the…the groom. As if I didn't already know about those things!"
Christian finished this rant indignantly and folded his arms onto his broad chest and glowered at the memory.
Belle was having a wonderful time picturing the scene and wondered why Christian couldn't see the humor in it.
"You never told me about this."
He looked up into her brown eyes with horror. "I should bloody well think not. I was trying to protect your gentle innocence. The things they told me would cause your ears to ring!"
"What kinds of things?"
Christian shuddered and shook his head trying to block it all out. "You don't want to know… Things I was supposed to expect and do…to you." He paused for a second wondering if she had caught his meaning. Then he again stared right into her face. " I swear on my parent's graves if I ever hear the words… stroke and… penetrate and…and intercourse come out of the mouth of Cogsworth again I'll be ill!"
Perhaps it was the fact that he looked like he was going to be ill right then and there from just talking about the memory that Belle finally lost it. Putting her hands over her face she began to laugh so hard her whole body shook with the movement. Christian was so startled by her reaction that he could only sit dumbfounded for a few moments as he listened to her laughter. With her hands pressed so firmly onto her face, she couldn't help but snort several times before he finally found his words again and glared impressively in her direction.
"Belle! This is not a laughing matter!"
Snorting once more she released her face from her hands for him to see several tears of laughter streaking down her cheeks.
"Oh 'Tian, yes it is! Would you have preferred to sit in on the conversation Mrs. Potts gave me when she explained exactly what you were going to do on our wedding night?"
Christian went a slightly paler shade of white and made a gagging motion at the thought of his former nanny discussing his sexual abilities or lack thereof to his future bride. Shaking his head firmly he set his jaw tight.
"A most emphatic no-thank-you! What women talk about behind closed doors is quite clearly not for a man's ears!"
Blowing out a derisive sigh through her nose, Belle nodded her head. "Well I have to agree with you on that. I doubt you would be able to handle it."
Christian gave her a suspicious look. "What is that supposed to mean?"
"It means that you have a tendency to shy away from things you don't understand."
Christian scowled at her assessment of him. "I understand things perfectly well and I do not shy away from anything!"
Without even missing a beat she responded to him. "That's not true, look at you! You're lying in a pile of books because you are shying away like a skittish colt!"
Not seeming to be able to come up with a counterargument to this, he wracked his brain trying to come up with something truly scathing to throw back at her. She would not win this argument; his dignity wouldn't allow it. After a few moments had passed he threw his head back and banged it on the bookshelf roughly. Giving her a withering look he clenched his fist.
"Well what is it you want me to do? I'm already trying to do everything! God, I cannot even spend time with my wife without getting myself into trouble. I do not know why I even bother anymore!"
Belle looked confused and blinked her eyes several times. "What do you mean? You didn't do anything wrong."
He gave a self-loathing chuckle. "Oh didn't I? I thought that was why you came in here."
Belle glared at him a little and set her mouth in a thin line of disapproval. "That is not why I came in here. I came here because I never get to see you. You know, if you cared to notice I have also had a rather big shock as of late and if it isn't too much trouble, your majesty, I would like a little comfort from you!"
Christian clenched his teeth in an ugly grimace that reminded Belle of a lion. She was contradicting him again. Why did she have to do that? It was one of the things that infuriated him the most about her and here she was pushing him to his wits end. He wondered for a moment if this was some sort of symptom of being with child. Increased annoyingness. With an air of defeat he threw up his hand sarcastically and let out a huge breath of air.
"Ha! What comfort did you think I could give you? I cannot even placate our people enough to keep them from throwing rotten food at my carriage as I ride through the streets. Maybe I should just go comfort a wild animal into eating me and put myself out of my own misery!"
Belle closed her eyes in disgust at his self-pity. Without opening her eyelids she let the impatience be heard in her voice. "Christian, no more disparaging remarks! I hate it when you do that."
Christian's hackles would have risen at this if he had had any. "Well I hate that you contradict me all the time." He countered with a little venom to his voice.
"And I hate the way you hide in here and sulk!" She said finally looking at him steadily.
"I hate that you came in here to bother me when I'm trying to sulk!"
Belle blew out a large breath through her nose and then spat out as quickly as the words would come, "And I hate it that you aren't excited about our baby!"
Neither spoke for several moments and when Christian finally looked up into his wife's face he was dismayed to see a slow tear streaking down her cheek. He sunk his shoulders feeling such intense guilt he would have liked to hit himself. Feeling a lump the size of a boulder fill his throat he gazed at Belle as she tried to pretend the tear was not coming down her face. Without even realizing it, Christian's own large blue eyes filled up to the rim as the weight of their oncoming parenthood finally fell upon him. He shook his head and blinked several time to try and push the tears back but this only served to let them escape. They tore down his face and dripped off his chin onto his chest.
"You don't understand…" he finally whispered to her, "I cannot be a father. You don't want me to be a father, Belle."
She choked a little on her own emotions and grabbed hold of his arm, clenching him tightly. "Yes I do!" she said forcefully. "I would not have married you if I did not want you to be a father to my children."
Christian angrily grabbed her hand and held it tightly in his own. "And what kind of a father do you think I'm going to be?! You have no idea what you are talking about. I am my own father's son and I could be just like him! I will not do it! I will not do that to our child. I'll lock myself up in the library and never come out for the rest of our baby's natural life! Do you hear me?"
Belle shook her head ruefully and with such tenderness ran her fingers along his temple and jaw. "Oh dearest, it will be alright. I promise it will be alright."
"No it won't!" He near-shouted. "It won't ever be alright!"
Slowly, and ever so gently, Belle leaned forward and took her lover's face in her hands. "Now you look at me." She said firmly forcing him to keep his attention on her. ""You are not your father. You have the right to change and be whatever you want. I know it hurts and you still can't bring yourself to admit it, but you were given that chance a long time ago. And as painful as it may feel, that Enchantress may have had that idea in mind when she met you."
She was right; those words did hurt. They hurt to hear and he wanted to shut them out. But that wouldn't make the baby go away; he would still have to face it. With a sad sigh he lowered his head and buried his face in her breast. She wrapped her hands around his neck and stroked the loose hair on the back of his head. He let out a painful moan and she felt hot tears press into the fabric of her bodice. His tears were like knives and she couldn't bare the thought of him crying over this. "Shhhh" she whispered into his ear and then kissed his lobe softly.
With one last ditch effort he finally whimpered so that she could barely hear him. "But I am a beast…."
She didn't speak at first and he couldn't bare the silence for more then a minute. Tentatively he raised his head so that he was once again looking into her face.
"No" She shook her head and the softest of smiles graced her features. "You are not a beast. You are my love. And that…is all that matters."
Christian choked on a soft sob but did not entirely allow it to escape. Finally he wrapped his arms around her neck and crushed her to his chest. "I love you so much! And I'm sorry that I didn't notice you needed me sooner. I will not let you down again, Belle. I promise."
Holding him almost as tightly as he was holding her she kissed the shoulder her face was pressed into. "You are going to be such a wonderful father. I know it."
Squeezing her to him for just a moment more he released her and sat back on his heels. They looked about themselves at the scattered books and said nothing for a few moments.
"So what are we supposed to do now?" He finally asked thinking that there must be something required of him now that they had a baby started.
She smiled and shrugged knowing very little more then he did. "Do you still want that drink?"
He gave her a pained look and then nodded his head gravely. "Very much."
She smiled. "Claude told me I wasn't to have any more of that until after the baby is born."
Christian lifted one shoulder in a half shrug and gave a ghost of a smile. "Suits me fine. I don't have to share that way." Then eying her suspiciously, Belle watched as he made a face that indicated he was screwing himself up to ask something he wasn't sure he should. Finally he opened his mouth.
"Are you going to get very big?" He said this softly as he stared at her stomach. She blinked once or twice before answering.
"Probably. Does that bother you?"
He looked from her belly and then up to her face. "No, I don't think so." Pause. "Goodness, I do not even know what to expect! The people will ask me questions and I will not know how to answer them!"
Belle smiled at his insecurities and took his hand in hers once more. "Don't worry about it. We will figure everything out. I believe in you. Remember that."
Christian nodded his head and began to get up off the floor when he felt a tug at his hand. Belle was looking at him expectantly as if he had forgotten something. When he realized that it was her he was forgetting he slowly lowered himself back down and sidled up as close to her as he dared. With only moments of hesitation he lowered his lips down onto hers.
To this day if he didn't remember anything else, he remembered that kiss. Her lips, so soft and warm, gently moved along with his own. At first he did not want it to go too far, for fear he would recoil at the thoughts of what they had made together. But as soon as her mouth parted into his he found that that moment was exactly what he had been missing. He kissed her long and hard that day and she, in turn, kissed him with passion and tenderness that she held for him and only him.
It really was what got them through it all. Their love.
