Disclaimer: If Axis Powers Hetalia were mine, I wouldn't need to write fanfics. If any of these songs were mine, I wouldn't be writing fanfics.

Background music: --

Minimal fluff 09!

---

User Guide to Ownership of A Nation

Thank you for shopping with the United Nations Shopping Network (UNSN)! We are dedicated to your 100% satisfaction with our products and guarantee you will not regret purchasing your nation! Our motto is 'A happy individual is a happy world', and our goal to spread worldwide happiness is achieved through our excellent products and professional craftsmanship. If you have any questions or comments, please contact us at XXX-XXXX.

--

Part of the sunny area known as Italy, the southern tip is normally overlooked as most consider the Italian peninsula to be united. However, southern Italy has flourished since markets were set up, located in a prime area in the Mediterranean Ocean. It has since become home to several branches of the mafia.

Congratulations! You are now the proud owner of the nation, South Italy (Romano)! As the southern most part of the Italian peninsula, it has been the area of prosperous trade and fierce activity!

(South Italy is part of the exclusive UNSN Nations™ Special Edition lineup; he is a purchasable nation once you have gained XXX points from former purchases. Thank you for your business and exceptional taste for the rarest!)

Getting Started

Included in the package you have received is one (1) Italian translation book, one (1) package of tomato seeds, and one (1) derringer revolver accessory. These items should be kept at hand at all times, especially during start-up, except the derringer which may be particularly harmful to the user and should be stored away until necessary.

Notable parts of South Italy (Romano) should you see when you open your package include: one (1) hair curl that juts out from the bangs, a grumpy expression, and he should look ready to attack. Romano is an aggressive nation that should have exercised caution around. If any of these qualities are absent, please contact our help line, as you have received a faulty product.

To activate, simply stroke the hair curl. Be warned to expect any sort of attack; Romano will instantly strike out at you, be it with head, fist, or foot. It is recommended that you stand in a hard to reach angle as Romano's reach is about a 360 angle. At this time, he will recover from his attack by speaking in rapid Italian. Romano's default language is Italian with a mixture of Spanish dialect, but you can adjust it to: English, Spanish by merely speaking to him in either language. Romano will talk to you in the language of your preference but he will revert back to Italian whenever he feels like it, which would include anger or sadness.

Work and Care

You should be prepared for Romano to lie around your residence all day ordering you around at his whim. He may leave and disappear for days at a time but he will always return once you establish your house is his home. Making your house his home is easy: cooking pasta is a sure fire method, as is leaving tomato plants lying around your residence. Romano is more attracted to tomatoes than opposites of a magnet and can be found wherever the red fruit is grown.

Under no circumstance should you ask Romano to do anything of importance. That includes any sort of handling, as he is likely to break whatever you want moved. You should not worry about him helping at all; in fact, it is very rare that he will offer to do so in the first place. In fact, you should not expect him to help you out in any way.

Romano may seem independent but he relies on your care. Although he can cook for himself, he prefers having others do so for him. He is extremely picky in his diet, so absolutely under no circumstance should he be served British food or German food. He may leave for weeks at a time, sulking until he comes back.

Once you befriend Romano, which can take from one day to three months based on his initial impression of you, he will linger around and prove himself to be a rather surprising nation. Although he rarely offers to help or do any sort of work, he can be surprising when he actually does do something helpful around the house. Since he doesn't do it often, when Romano does contribute, it is to the best of his ability. If he happens to upset you, exhibit patience as Romano will yell back at you if you yell at him and attempt to argue you out. If you establish yourself as a threatening figure, he may run away if he upsets you, but you can easily lure him back with tomato plants outside your door.

Unlike his brother, Romano is more decent in terms of going au natural. You need not worry about minor discrepancies from this. However, although he will probably not change if you tell him so, you must clearly state your issue with him, as he has selective moods and will not take up the fact that you are upset with him. He is not oblivious; Romano simply does not care.

To keep Romano at tip top shape and in a good mood, be sure to provide him with tomatoes and be careful not to run out. Although you don't have to shower him with them every second of the day, he will be upset if you don't have a daily offering. He may not seem like he wants affection, but it is in your benefit to cuddle with him, regardless of whatever he may say to you. His default mood is tsudere and he usually means the opposite of what he says.

Under no reason should you compare his face to a tomato. This awakens a natural response to attack you. Under no circumstance should you tease him in any way. In fact, refrain from being too blunt or risk serious injuries. The UNSN is not responsible for any injuries sustained from our products. The only one who can get away with it is Spain.

Connections

In the UNSN Nations™ lineup, our nations can make connections with other nations as a result of our alliance pact. It is ill advised to own more than one nation at once, as you have the potential of having a war occur in your household. However, your nation can make friendships with other nations in the Nations™ brand.

Establishing a connection is easy. Simply take your nation out to meet other nations. When a potential connection is possible, your nation will react in a unique way.

In Romano's case, he will not show any outward signs of recognition or acknowledgement to the other nation. Although other nations have different initial reactions, Romano is one of the nations who prefers to be in the company of those he is familiar with. He has self esteem issues that he rarely discusses and may feel inadequate toward other nations. If he starts being unusually rude, it is an indication that he is afraid or wary of the other nation and should be taken away before he starts crying. He has special connections with certain nations, which will be explained below.

Spain – Romano is especially tsudere toward this nation. Initially, Romano will be extremely mean to the thick headed Spaniard, and this should be expected. This is the strongest connection Romano has between another nation. Because of Romano's default tsudere personality, he will avoid Spain for long periods of time, all the while complaining of the other's 'idiocy'. It is recommended you drag him out to see Spain before Romano boarders on obsessive.

Italy – Romano's brother; these two will have a rough introduction, with Romano yelling at Italy until he cries. This is completely normal. Once you establish a connection, be certain to expect Italy at random times of the day without warning. Sometimes Italy may take Romano home, but be sure to leave tomato plants out as Romano can sense them from miles away.

Germany – Italy's ally, although Romano does not take warmly to him. It may not be clear that a connection has been established, since Romano will take up most of the time swearing Germany out. Afterwards, be expectant of strange schemes Romano will cook up to embarrass Germany, almost always including strange items like fake moustaches. Be sure to be ready to console Romano when he comes back after a failed attempt.

Establishing a connection is permanent. It is more work to maintain Romano's mood after he is exposed to other nations, but unlocks more potential for his personal growth. And even if the growth is not obvious, it is amusing to watch. It is encouraged to let Romano meet other nations and note the reactions.

Troubleshooting

Romano is acting very strangely and spastically, and he twitches a lot!

Congratulations! Romano has chorea! The chorea event will only occur when a connection with Spain has been made. Easily curable; just mention to Spain that Romano is sick and Spain will immediately come over to dance the Tarantella and Romano will be better.

Romano is saying 'Chigi~' and nothing else! What does it mean?

'Chigi~' is part of Romano's vocabulary. It is neither Italian, Spanish, or English. It is normal for him to say it whenever he is stressed in any way. It is a mysterious sound that no one knows the origin or reason.

Romano is crying and when I try to comfort him, he tells me to go away!

Give Romano his space. When he feels like being clingy, he will be clingy. When he wants to be alone, it is best to leave him alone. In his tsudere mode, he will not tell you what is upsetting him, but you will know.

Romano is acting scary and he's always holding the derringer!

Beware, the mafia strikes. Lay low for a while until he becomes normal.

Help! Romano is head butting me and it really hurts!

Head butting is Romano's signature defense move. Although you cannot unprogram it from his hardware, it is suggested that you become quick on your feet to avoid it whenever it strikes. He can easily be calmed down with some pasta or a tomato.

---

There are many other possibilities for Romano's growth! We encourage you to expose him to different things and notice his reactions! There are many sides to this seemingly eternally grumpy southern part! You are now responsible for a full grown nation, and with responsibilities come commitments. Hopefully, these commitments come with much fun, and you enjoy our product!

--

Note: I feel like I sort of copied a lot from the template for Italy…I'm at a loss for words. Yes, you may order nations now, just send in a $1000 initial payment (in cash) and I'll see what I can do. Reviews are also nice, if you want more purchasable characters. I need something to keep the catalogue running, you know.