Awful Azula & Leapin Lizards

"Aang, sweetie, it's time to practise your fire bending again!" Zuko trilled, strutting over to where Aang was sitting in the garden. His robes were skin tight, and instead of the sunny orange, they were grey and black, with streaks of blood red. He turned to Zuko, and with his air bending, caused the white fluffy clouds to thicken to grey, and twine around him in the air like a vortex-

"Yeah, yeah, I'm lazy too, but we have to be prepared for daddy's big over reaction in a few weeks." Zuko sniffed. Ever since his dad had thrown him out for being a bit of a whoopsie, he hadn't felt the obligation to, you know, honour him and all.

Aang rolled his black rimmed eyes and got to his feet.

"Ok, let's start with routine one," Zuko said, "Just like I taught you!"

"Do I have to?" Aang grumbled reproachfully, "It's so stupid."

"AAAND," Zuko continued, ignoring him," FIVE-SIX-SEVEN-EIGHT- sashay!"

Aang began Zuko's routine, which looked more like contemporary dance than fire bending. He scooted to the side, arms raised above him and his fingers spread wide. He performed a girlish twirl and wiggled his fingers, causing puffs of flames to appear.

"And twirl," Zuko ordered, completely buzzed, "And LEAP! And spiral! Seven, Eight- PIOURETTE! And sparkle!" He added, beaming. Aang was dying inside.

"And shimmy," Zuko continued, as Aang carried on making a fool of himself looking like a fairy belching out fire, "And blow!" Aang let rip with a flourish of fire from his throat-

"CUT! CUT!" Zuko protested, jogging forwards and shaking his head exasperatedly.

"You're making it too scary." He criticized, looking tearful, "It's meant to be dramatic, revitalizing, RE-BIRTHING, but you don't want to scare them!"

Aang looked at him, wondering which idiot had mothered this guy, "It's fire bending," He said slowly, "The most intimidating art form this world has probably ever seen! It's meant to be scary. Look- timeout." He stormed off, leaving Zuko rubbing his temples and shaking his head.

"He's having a rough time," He told himself, "Maybe he just needs someone to confide in-"

"No I don't!" Aang called over his shoulder, "And it definitely wouldn't be you, anyway!"

He stormed back into the house and nearly ran straight into Katara.

"Sorry," She said blearily, blushing "That was my fau-"

"Yep." Aang agreed quickly, and continued with his moody act. In the world of opposite Avatar, Aang was not such a charmer. He liked Katara, sure, but he never really tried anything. Mostly he wrote tortured poetry about her, and stared at her when she was sleeping. Creepy, but true. Of course, even a Parallel Dimension couldn't deny the connection between Aang and Katara, so she liked him too. But whenever she had a chance to talk to him, her mind worked so slow that he was gone before she had anything interesting to say.

"I like your hair toda…" She began, but he had already whizzed over to his patch of floor where he slept. Aang didn't even have hair, "Oh, maybe next time, Katara."

Aang flumped to the floor, "He just doesn't understand." He told himself, and to Toph who was sitting crossed-legged on her raised part of earth and pulling dirt off of the mud she was melting and moulding in her little palms.

"Nope." She agreed, not knowing what they were talking about. She pulled out a dinky little fan and attempted to waft away the invisible germs that he may have brought with him.

"I mean…" Aang rolled onto his back and caught a fly between his finger and thumb with awesome reflexes, "I guess saving the world would be pretty neat, sure it would," With a little bit of concentration, he caused the fly to roast between his grip, and found he enjoyed it, "But sometimes, I think the world would be a better place if it was alive with fire, and screams and-"

"Oo-ho-ho-KAY, Buddy, let's hold it right there." Toph interrupted hastily, "Don't you think you're being a little bit morbid? What about butterflies? And Candy? And mittens!" She flumped onto her back, a look of wonderment on her face and completely forgetting her point, "Sometimes it's just so easy to forget the mittens…"

Aang ignored her and continued to vent his feelings- he'd filled up his seventh journal already, and had yet to buy a new one, "It's just, they don't understand. The pressure, the expectation. Everyone thinks I'm like the messiah."

"Ah, the Messiah." Came a serene voice, one much too familiar, "He took up our infirmities and carried our diseases- Matthew, 8:16."

Toph sprung up from her pedestal, and covered her mouth with her delicate, manicured hands, "Oh dear!"

Aang slowly clambered to his feet, and faced the terrible threesome that was more determined to bring about the GAang's demise than Zuko was. Reluctantly, he looked to the three girls posing in front of them, disrupting their little house. Somewhere in the back of his strangely orbed head, he wondered what the others' reaction would be when they got back from the market to find this little surprise waiting for them. They always reacted with so much more exaggeration compared to him.

Mai shut her mouth primly after her little outburst of religious trivia. She seemed to always be able to relate things back to her religion, it was all she would talk about. This made combat a bit of a challenge for this love and peace Nazi. (So to speak). As usual, she wore her long white clothing, her hands folded together amidst the extravagant sleeves and a peaceful facial expression.

Ty Lee was just as subdued- glumly, she scanned the surroundings and brushed the dust off of her black clothing. She was checking out the Aura, her eyebrows wiggling with suspicion. The GAang rarely heard a word from her- she was pretty morbid, and even though she was flexible and could move fast, she didn't have the commitment to attack with style. In conflict, she would stroll amidst the ruckus, simply prodding and poking people and moving on before they hit the floor.

"I don't like this Aura." She decided, "I can feel a lot of depression, angst-"

"Oh that's just Aang, ignore him." Toph assured her, and quickly fell silent as the third girl made herself noticed.

Azula. Still terrifying, yes, but in a completely different sense. At the passing of her name in casual conversation, a shudder of discomfort would ripple through the GAang. They would shift and rub their arms subconsciously, wincing at memories of previous encounters with the Fire Nation Princess. What's changed?

"Hi, Guys!" Azula chirruped, leaping forwards. Like a choreographed salsa, Toph and Aang retreated with the same speed, but with less enthusiasm and more terror, "Haven't seen you for a while! You've been so sneaky!"

And- here it comes- she slammed a playful punch into Aang's arm. Even Emo Aang couldn't stop himself from showing some emotion. He whimpered and knew- as he flew towards the ground with alarming speed- that he would never be the same again. As he hit the floor, he immediately began repressing this memory.

"You guys." Azula preened cheerfully, lifting back her foot and kicking Aang in the stomach for good measure, "You are so funny!!" She aimed another playful punch, this time at Toph, who squeaked and burrowed into the ground quicker than Azula had the reactions for. She stumbled and fell onto the floor. Aang's heart stopped as she slowly twisted on the ground, sat up, and wiped the dirt off of her face, taking in what had just happened.

Oh, GOD I'm going to die…Aang thought with glee.

"Oh, TOPH!!" Azula shrieked with unbelievable mirth, "You're SUCH-" She struck the spot where Toph had disappeared with lighting, and the other three dove for cover- "A"- And again; the shelves dislodged and pottery smashed against the ground- "TEASE!!" One final blow, the smoke dissolved and a crater revealed a trembling Toph. She clawed her way towards ground level, gasping for breath and throwing the earth off of her with flourished movements of her arms, shrieking things about "unclean" and "must destroy clothes".

"So." Azula said, folding her arms and gazing at them with affection, "You wanna come with us or what?"

"Where?" Aang asked in a small voice, still shielding his skull. Azula drew in breath and let rip with a screeching cackle.

"Oh you!" She trilled, reaching for him with a wild flurry of grabbing palms. He shrunk backwards and pulled Toph in front of him, narrowly avoiding a brutal noogie. Toph gave an irritated snort at this mutiny, and then covered her mouth and blushed with shame. Azula gave up and stood back, still grinning.

"To prison, silly!" She cooed, "Come on, there's a few spare seats on the Lizard we're travelling with! We can pick up your little friends from the Market!" She grabbed his and Toph's hands and began to drag them towards the rearing reptile waiting for them.

"Um, actually, we had other plans-"

"Other plans?" Azula repeated, her vice like grip cutting into their bones, "But we're going to have so much fun!"

"Hey, Aang, are you ready to practise the routine again or wh-" Zuko ran straight into Azula who was still handling the pair of them like sacks of rice. They stared at each other for a moment.

"Zuko!" Azula said, her lip wobbling, "I…I…are you coming with us too?"

"To where?" He spat, giving her such a dirty look she almost turned into a piece of mould, "Another one of your birthday parties that ends in a hospital bill so long it could be used to jot down the many, many ways that you disgust me?"

She blinked after this impressive delivery of spite. Then her face split into the immovable smile that Zuko knew and dreaded.

"Oh, YOU!" She shrieked, "Why you're such a-"

Zuko fitted his whole palm over her face, and twisted her in such a way that she twirled around and fell face down on the floor. Mai looked at him in horror.

"Love your neighbour as yourself!" She spouted, outraged. Zuko ignored her, grabbed Toph and Aang by their clothes and dragged them after him.

"So alike." Toph commented wearily as she stumbled to keep up with Zuko, comforted by the fact that he at least cleaned his nails.

"Come on, we've gotta move." Zuko said firmly, "Let's find the others, get our stuff and cheese it."

It didn't take them long to find them. Suki and Sokka were flirting obscenely in public, and Katara had successfully caused an Ostrich-Horse-drawn cart to crash by wandering out in front of it.

"GUYS!" Zuko practically squealed, "We've gotta get outta here! Azula's, like, totally on our trail!"

"Oh, Sokka, put me down!" Suki giggled, obviously not against being tossed around in Sokka's big burly arms for just a few more seconds-

"I MEAN LIKE NOW!" Zuko screeched, giving Suki a very dirty look, which was DEFINITELY not at ALL linked to the fact that Sokka was still holding her in his big ol' arms.

Obediently, they scuttled to his side, and Katara shortly joined them, but only because she was following a butterfly that was headed their way.

"Ok, so we let them follow us into the woods, then we turn back, pack up our things, get on Appa and-"

But Zuko didn't have time to complete the low down of the strategy. Because at that moment, there was a very curious keening coming from just over the hill Zuko, Toph and Aang had come over a few seconds before. A second later, more people emerged, screaming and throwing their shopping up in the air. A beastly lizard…thing appeared in quick succession, whipping out it's tongue in all different directions and catching birds that had taken flight from the nearby trees, happily munching on them just as-

"COOOOEEY!" Azula warbled, waving wildly. They all froze.

"Oh. My. G-" Suki began.

"Please. Don't." Mai called pleadingly. Suki blushed and nestled into Sokka for support. Zuko tutted with irritation. Sokka flexed his muscles threateningly, completely willing to fight a girl or three. Katara seemed to be snoozing whilst standing. Toph was hopping about on one foot, having lost a shoe.

Aang was concentrating very hard.

And then his arrows started to shine.

"Everybody hold hands." He said calmly.

"Pfft- no way, man." Sokka snorted in his deep voice, "You think I look like a-?"

"HOLD HANDS!!" Aang bellowed in his Avatar State voice, convincing them to all grasp each other. Sokka wouldn't look at Zuko, who was quite content as he clutched Sokka's fingers in his.

There was a flash, and for the first time in history, the Avatar entered the Spirit World and took all of his little friends with him.

Problem was, that caused a little glitch in the Universe.

And then things took a very unexpected turn.

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