A/N: Here's the next chapter. It's not amazing, but I hope you enjoy it. Excuse the typos. I've just come out of surgery so I'm a bit off balance.
"I find a map and draw a straight line
Over rivers, farms, and state lines
The distance from here to where you'd be
It's only finger-lengths that I see"
Alex Vause
Alex wasn't one to cry over anyone, much less a girlfriend. She had always been renowned for her thick skin and infallible instincts. However, this moment struck a chord deep down within her. Decked out in her oversized khaki military trousers and matching insulation jacket – her huge and heavy boots encasing her feet – she hastily made her way towards the drab U.S Army Force military aircraft in a fine attempt at avoiding the onslaught of tears a single glance at her lover would stimulate. With each step, she felt further and further away from the woman she was deeply, madly, totally in love with.
Alex Vause had served active duty in the United States Army for the past four years. Her decision to join was inertly aroused following the sudden death of her mother and consequently, her dark descent into the swallows of drug addiction. She knew there was something more to life, but what? It wasn't until a chance encounter in the early months of 2009 that exponentially transformed her existence. Unexpectedly, it came in the mystic form of a tall blonde: Piper Chapman. As a General Army Service Officer, Piper had balls of steel (metaphorically, of course) and a goofy sternness that Alex found particularly attractive in a female. The first night the couple spent together was something that left a firm imprint in her mind; her heart fluttered just thinking about it. It was the first time she felt satisfied and happy. She started to wonder if that was what love was about. Piper wasn't a bit surprised when Alex asked her to move in with her two months later, nor was she when Alex proposed to her exactly five years to the date they met. Even though they had yet to set a wedding date, Alex had promised her fiancée that as soon as she returned from her deployment, they would get married. That was the only morsel of optimism keeping the couple afloat in the cavernous depths of despair and remoteness.
What the fuck am I doing? Alex thought, resisting the prevailing urge to erupt into a torrent of tears. Impulsively, she turned around to find Piper clutching the wire fence with her left hand, her right concealing the tears precipitously flowing down her flushed face. Alex thought she could hear the tears echoing loud and clear through the brisk New York air.
"I love you," Piper shouted across the open landing field.
Alex's delicate face rose and her whole body jerked with the sound of Piper's voice.
"I love you more."
The 15,000 U.S Troops sat tightly beside each other in the packed aircraft as it flew at 35,000 feet. With her seat facing other militants – mostly men – Alex glanced down at the floor in sorrow. Unlike the thousands sitting around her, Alex was new to the deployment process. She didn't know a single soul. Despite the self-assured front she presented to others, none of that confidence ran about her insides in this claustrophobic container.
"You okay?" a voice suddenly said, quite close to her, making her jump in surprise.
Alex's green eyes widened as her head mechanically turned to her right, her eyes resting on a bulky man with a solemn face, his dark hair effortlessly slicked back.
"Um. Wha— Me?"
"Yeah. You look a bit flushed. You want me to go grab you some water?"
Alex blushed. "Um, no. All good," she stuttered, her hands clasping together, fidgeting with the hem of her heavy field jacket.
"First time, huh?" the man asked after a pause, a pleasant lilt to the tone of his voice.
"First? Ah-Oh right, yeah," Alex swallowed nervously, folding her arms across her chest, awkwardly looking down at the floor below them. She felt her chest begin to restrict with an unknowing feeling, which she attributed to the lack of windows and consequently, the stuffy air circulating the cabin.
The man suddenly jumped as if remembering something, pulling up his sleaves.
"Oh, how rude of me. I'm U.S. Marine Sgt. Marshall Townsend or Marsh, for short," he said with a tentative smile on his face, his hand outstretched towards her.
Alex stared at it, slightly apprehensive. "Alex. Alex Vause," she introduced, taking his hand in a firm grip, hoping to come across as strong.
Marsh politely smiled; the type of grin you would see on a little kid. "Well, it's awfully nice to meet you, Alex."
"Likewise." Alex murmured, turning her head, attempting to avoid his piercing blue eyes.
Alex's glance awkwardly returned to her shoes and away when he looked down at her fingers.
"Who's the lucky guy?" he harmlessly chuckled.
The blood abruptly rushed up into her face, her anxiety and heartache suddenly starting to boil up and spill over.
"Dude! I'm just going to spit it out," she sighed, passive aggressively taking a breath, struggling to hold her temper, "I'm not like you, yeah? You're wasting your time. What do you want from me?"
Marsh's smile precipitously turned into a frown, his eyes veiled with worry and concern.
"I'm—I'm sorry," he stuttered. "I didn't mean to upset you. I know how it feels to leave your loved ones."
Marsh took a deep breath, causing Alex to look over her shoulder. A tinge of regret unexpectedly thumping her heart like a dagger.
"Last night, my daughter ran up to me—" he softly muttered, "—tears were running down her face. She's only five but she's a little pocket rocket that one. Like any parent, I asked her what was wrong." Marsh suddenly stopped, brushing the back of his hand across his forehead. "She said to me— um," he abruptly shook his head, unable to continue.
"Oh god, sorry I don't know why I'm telling you this."
Alex frowned, playing with the ring on her finger. "What did she say?" she asked as empathetically as she could.
Marsh fidgeted, attempting a fake laugh to cover the sudden sadness in his voice.
"She looked me in the eyes and asked, 'Why can't the war just come here so you don't have to go?' I laughed, of course. I told her about the baddies in the war and how America was the safest place for Mommy and her. It wasn't until she said, in her squeaky little voice, 'I could help you. We could work together as a team. I don't care if I die. At least you would still be alive' that I couldn't help myself. She would risk her own life for mine. Do you know how heartbreaking it is to hear your very own child say something like that? It's horrible. Of the five short years of her life, I've only been there for two," he exclaimed, tears welling up in his eyes. He tried to blink them away, but some tears had already started rolling down his hood. "But, that's enough of me," he said, trying to hide the tears starting to pile down his face with an awkward laugh.
Alex cracked her knuckles and her mouth set into a fine line, eyes gazing intensely at the ground. She didn't know what to say or do. She sighed and crossed her arms tightly over her chest.
Fuck, she thought. What am I supposed to say now?
"I overreacted before. I was out of line. I'm sorry to hear—"
"—You don't need to be sorry. We all feel the same. It's just, well, some of us have more experience in hiding our feelings. To be honest, we're all in the same boat – well, plane to be exact," he laughed, clasping his flushed cheeks in embarrassment. "That was a bit lame, wasn't it?"
"Yeah, a bit," Alex said, popping a side grin sowing a dimple.
Marsh sighed contently, straightening up to adjust his seat.
"I'm leaving behind somebody too," Alex exclaimed, cumbersomely playing with the split ends of her jet-black hair. "I don't know where I would be without her. She's my life," she shuddered, her face blushing. "God, now I sound like the corny one."
"Not at all," Marsh responded, a gentle smile returning to his face.
Alex sighed. "Her name's Piper," she muttered, instinctively touching her ruby stoned heart necklace; a present Piper had bought her for her 32nd birthday. "We're engaged, you know? Yeah, as soon as I return, we're getting married," she paused, trying to suppress the onslaught of tears that were just dying to be released.
Marsh instinctively zipped open his backpack, retrieving a small set of tissues and placing them on Alex's lap.
"You scared the distance will affect your relationship?" he asked, earnestly.
"No. Not, at all. I think that when you have a connection with someone it never really goes away, you know? You snap back to being important to each other because you still are."
Marsh nodded, placing his hand on her shoulder, "Great minds think alike."
She pulled out a tissue to wipe her face before she turned back to him. "You got someone?"
Marsh let out a little laugh. "If you were wondering whether I was going to hit on you, I've got some awfully sad news for you – I am happily married to my beautiful wife and to put it quite bluntly, not looking for some 'hanky panky' on the side. But, there's no denying that you're a lovely lady, just not my type" he cheekily winked.
Alex snickered. "Well, that's good to know."
Marsh returned to his backpack, grasping a packet of Wrigley gum.
"Want some?" he asked, unwrapping a piece.
Alex politely shook her head. Marsh unwrapped another three pieces, plopping them all in his mouth, chewing them as if they were tobacco.
He mumbled something inaudibly as his tongue pushed the gum to the inside of his left cheek. "You know what, Alex Vause? I've got your back. You wanna get back to your fiancée in one piece, yeah? Well, I'm going to make that happen," he said, enthusiastically. "On my last recruitment, a few of my close companions didn't make it. But, you know what, Alex? I'm not going to lose anybody else, including you."
She smiled in response, her face turning a shade of pink. "Promise?"
"Promise with all my heart," he whispered, friendlily taking her hand. "But, only if you don't go ape shit on me again."
Alex let out a chuckle and cheerfully shrugged.
"Fine, then. Deal."
