A/N: Chapter two is always a nice mile mark for me. This whole thing originally came about cause i thought Watari would look like Wakaba. I hope you enjoy, but if you don't, what can i say? Oops? Anywaysers, i don't own Yami no Matsuei. Horror of horrors, i don't even own a single of the books. Something i need to work on.
The night before mid-january...
"Yes! Yes! Yes! This has to be right. I know it!" Watari was dancing around his home/private lab. On the counter was a beaker filled with a green-streaked bubblegum pink liquid. His sex change potion. The delighted man turned to his owl, 003. "I've done it! 003, it will actually work this time!" He did a quick mental recap of all the other times he'd said that and been wrong. Firmly eschewing such thoughts, he whipped the beaker into the air. He winked at 003. She just blinked. "Down the hatch!"
Watari stood in the middle of the room, a big grin on his face, beaker empty. For 15 minutes. Then his grin cracked into a grimace. And that pose was held for another 20 minutes or so. He was about to give up and admit defeat when... **PO**OOF*!*!* (Asterix are sparklies.) Huge clouds of smoke filled the room, blocking 003's view of her giant. Not that she cared. As long as he was out in time for dinner.
"Gack! Where'd all this come from!? Shoo! Shoo, smoke! You're unwanted!" He waved his arms around trying to scatter the smoke, but only succeeded in spreading it around. At least it thinned out, though. Well, he could see across the room. (Good enough, right?) But something seemed a bit off with his view. Unable to determine what was wrong, the man just shrugged and reverted his attention to smoke annihilation.
"Window. Right." (He said this out loud for all good ideas should be heard and he only had good ideas.) So Watari stumbled through the mess he called his living room and pushed open the nearest window. The smoke began pouring into the night. "Aaaahhhh, fresh air! What a night." A gust of wind blew a clump of snow in his face. He abruptly turned his back on the fresh air. "Hmph. Who needs it?"
Watari looked around his room again thinking that something was wrong but unable to place what. What was more important, his living room would now stink like explosion(in other words, failure) and even with the fresh air would not air out for a while. With a sigh, he looked over at 003, who in turn looked at him as though he were a beloved three-headed monster. So, normally. "This place is gonna smell for a bit, 003, so why don't we go sleep over at Tsuzuki's?"
With bird on his shoulder and smoke out the window, the man walked over to his bathroom for a clean up so Tsuzuki wouldn't be able to guess what had happened. (Of course not, cause that would take the fun out of telling it, wouldn't it?)
He was brought to a stop when he looked in the mirror. Someone was looking back. "Wakaba, i thought you were in Okinawa." As he said this, the unexplained Wakaba mouthed the words with him. Then it hit him. "Oh, my palpitating heart," he exclaimed. "That's me! ME! It worked! I'm a genius!"
Watari began dancing around his spaciously cluttered bathroom, knocking over this and that on his way. He broke into a song. "I did it! Uh-huh, uh-huh, oh yeaah. I did it!" This victory chant was interrupted by a girlish squeal. "GO ME!"
He gazed back at the mirror showing his accomplishment. "Huh. I never would have thought me and Wakaba would look so alike. Interesting. I have to go show Tsuzuki!"
So he raced towards the front door, completely ignoring the fact he was still a mess. Watari was just about to open the door when something occurred to him. "If i tell Tsuzuki, he won't eat anything i give him, which means, i can't make him try it, and he'll tell everyone, which means... which means..." He came to the horrid conclusion of this train of thought. "Nobody else will drink it either!" he gasped.
Staring at his hand, he slowly took it off the door knob and calmly locked the door. "And that just won't do." As he backed away from the door, Watari began brainstorming(aloud.) "I need away to get every one to try it. But how can i? No one eats anything i give them. All too cautious for their own good, i say. They only eat Wakaba's food, but she's not here so i can't even bribe her with good fun. Shoot, if only i was really Wakaba!"
A mischievous glint came into his eye. The plan started coming together around the kitchen entrance, but Watari just backwards-turned down the hall and was almost to his bedroom when it all clicked in to place. (It should be noted that here was where the mischievous glint turned evil.) A grin became plastered to his feminine face. "This might actually work."
Being a big believer in following a well put together plan, Watari began his step-by-step _Make The Others Flip Genders Plan_. First, said plan required a soundtrack. Rooting through his closet, he soon pulled out a CD by The Clash and popped it in the player. "Step one, check."
Being on the road to accomplishment, Watari felt it necessary to take a deep breath, so deep breath it was. There was still the distinct eau-de-explosion, but what had earlier smelt of failure now had the tangy/spicy scent of... "Victory."
The next steps were all much less important than the music and deep breath, so i'll just give you the results: The green streaked bubblegum-pink sex change potion was now safely stowed away in 6 banana-nut-chocolate-chip muffins, just enough for his top favorite colleges, (Tsuzuki, Hisoka, Tatsumi, Chief, Saya and Yuma{ Saya and Yuma barely count, but they were hardly ever there so he wanted to include them in the fun and it was just rude to give every one but your boss muffins.}) They were placed in a basket and set on the table for easy excess in the morning.
Next, Watari pulled a dress out of his _For When My Potion Works_ closet and set that aside also for early morning excess. With all the plan he was capable of doing that night done, he decided to explore what it was like to be a girl. By the time he finally went to bed that night, what was discovered was: 1. Girl-Watari's have smaller feet. 2. 003 does not seem to care if Watari is girl of boy. 3. Becoming a girl does not automatically make you a good cook (Observed after trying an un-potioned muffin.) And let us not forget 4. Girl-Watari's look like Wakaba. Note of interest DOes this mean Boy-Wakabas look like Watari? Further research is required.
When morning finally arose, Watari assembled himself in dress and basket and set off to work. No one noticed. His first prey had been Hisoka, who seemed reluctant but downed the whole thing. Even lied about the taste. Watari was disappointed for a second at no sudden change, but remembered his 30 minutes of standing there and cheerfully went off for more vict- i mean, volunteers. Then came Tsuzuki in the break room. He'd been all too enthusiastic about try Wakaba Muffins. He complemented the muffin as well, only he wasn't lying. Shortly after, Tsuzuki was scared into his office by Tatsumi, who also ate a muffin, though slowly and tediously. When the secretary left to see Konoe, Watari sent him with a muffin for the boss. He soon ran into Saya and Yuma, who were discussing what new Pink House clothes to try to shove Hisoka into(instead of working.) Again, more than willingly, down went the accepted muffins. They looked as if they might have rather not, but down they went all the same.
The basket was now empty. Mission accomplished.
It was a long hard 30 minutes that he had to wait before he could check on Hisoka. The minutes slowly ticked by, and though the clock on the wall never moved (it was broken) those agonizing minutes did eventually pass. Once gone, Watari set about finding the boy. When he came to the bathroom where Hisoka should have been, what was there instead was a ten pound Shih-tzu. With green eyes. Not good. "Well, that wasn't supposed to happen." Just as the scientist's brain was making all the right connections about the dog that sat before him, Tsuzuki pulled up behind him. And what did he see? Not the pooch. The empty bathroom (the door was still open) and Hisoka's clothes, but no kid.
"AHHH! Some pervert kidnapped Hisoka!" Obviously, Tsuzuki's mind was going with the Hisoka-went-in-the-bathroom-but-some-creepo-was-in-there-waiting-took-off-his-clothes-and-whisked-him-away possibility. (Oh, how well he knows his partner.) Sadly, that one is much easier to believe then Hisoka-magicly-turned-into-a-dog. Still, one has to try. "Umm, Tsuzuki?" Said Watari, whom everyone else thought was Wakaba, "I don't think Hisoka was kidnapped. I think he turned in to a dog."
A/N: I was reading the first volume of this last night and something really unexpected cracked me up. I realize that even though Muraki is creepo-speako and all that jazz, he is human(kinda.) And with most of them being super-power-dead people in the story, i must have set my expectations a bit higher. Despite common-sense, i found it undeniably weird that when he abducts Hisoka, he rides away in a GET AWAY CAR. I mean, evil kenevil and keniving bad guys almost always use get away cars(cept the richies who use helicopters, planes and such) but he's kidnapping a SHINIGAMI. Don't you think he should have chosen a more... i don't know... immediate retreat? Something magical?
