Aliceandra – I'm glad I made you laugh, and yes, I'm planning on posting another chapter soon. Thanks for the review.

CrossoverAUman – I don't understand why anyone wouldn't like Twilight, but I'm honored that you decided to read this nonetheless. Thanks for the review and I'm glad I got a chuckle out of you!

ClaireQ857 – Thanks, I'm glad you liked last chapter.

AndromedaMarine– Thanks for your kind review; it's nice to see that Stargate people read my other stories too. I'm glad you liked chapter 1, and thanks for saying most characters were IC. I can see why some aren't, and I'll try to work on that. Thanks for putting me on alert.

Saphiretwin369 – It's nice to know you like Twilight too, because I always loved your reviews on my Stargate drabbles. Thanks for pointing out to me which ones you liked best, that helps a lot.

sparklyshimmer2010 – Sparklyshimmer! I'm so glad you read last chapter, despite disliking Twilight; that really means a lot to me. I always looked forward to your reviews on my other stories, and it's a surprise to see you here! Thanks for listing your favorites, it makes writing the other quotes easier. Oh, and don't worry – I'm going to update my Stargate stories too, but right now my entire world's been turned upside down by Twilight. I have it bad, I'm afraid…

kaitebug – Thanks for the review, I'm glad you liked it.

The Twilight Chronicles

16.
Bella: "You're impossible fast… and strong. Your skin is pale white and ice cold. Your eyes change colour, and sometimes you speak like you're from a different time. You never eat or drink anything. You don't go out into the sunlight. You've got to give me some answers."
Edward: "I'd rather hear your theories."
Bella: "You're Bigfoot, having sun allergies and wearing contacts lenses - on a diet?"

17.
Edward: "Penny for your thoughts?"
Alice: "Puh-lease. I'd be rich beyond my wildest dreams if you were serious."

18.
Edward: "Charlie, we have some good news."
Charlie: "Oh my God! You're pregnant, aren't you?!"
Bella:"If only... Every time I have my period, I have to stay away from his family. It's beyond annoying!"

19.
Carlisle: "We are vegetarians."
Laurent: "Really? What a coincidence; so am I."
Carlisle: "Are you serious? I was under the impression your pack-"
Laurent: "I'm a member of Greenpeace, too. I think it's hideous that animals suffer because of those arrogant humans. Maybe if we eat the entire human population, the animals will be left alone at last."

20.
Bella: "Edward, will you play my lullaby for me?"
Edward: "Of course, love, close your eyes and listen."
Emmett (in the background): "You know, that song does sound awfully familiar."
Esme (in the background): "Shss, it's the main theme from Titanic; don't let Bella in on it."

21.
Emmett: "So... how about it?"
Rosalie: "It has been years since the last time."
Emmett: "It feels more like centuries."
Rosalie: "You're awfully romantic! All right, pop the question, darling."
Emmett: "Great! Rosalie, will you marry me?"
Rosalie: "Oh, Emmett! Let's go tell the family!"
Emmett: "Don't forget to take your ring off..."

22.
Jacob: "Bella, we never hang out anymore. How about we go cliff-diving?"
Edward: "She only jumped because she wanted to hear my voice, mongrel."
Bella: "I guess it would be more prudent to call him from now on."

23.
Mike: "So, Bella, how are you and Edward doing these days? I'm sure that, what with the kid and all, you two don't have a lot of time for each other anymore."
Bella: "Edward is still quite the romantic, Mike, don't worry. Whenever I'm hungry, he takes me out for dinner."

24.
Bella: "I know this is awkward, Edward, but shall we accept Jacob into our family?"
Edward: "I don't know; I'm more of a cat person myself."

25.
Charlie: "Hypothetically… if someone were to shoot Edward – would it have any effect at all?"
Bella: "Did you honestly believe I wouldn't have stolen your gun if the answer to that question was yes?"

26.
Renesmee: "Mom, Jacob and I shared our first kiss."
Edward: "Am I allowed to break his jaw now?"

27.
Edward: "Alice, what are you hiding from me?"
Alice: "Hiding? What do you mean?"
Edward: "Your citing Japanese instructions to build an Ark in your head gave you away, sister."

28.
Billy: "Dear Santa, forget about the cure for all disease and world peace. I don't want any of that for Christmas this year. But could you please make me into a wolf? Sincerely, Billy Black."

29.
Edward: "Renesmee, we need to have a talk with you."
Bella: "You have to be home before dark every day."
Edward: "You have to do your very best at school."
Bella: "You and Jacob are not allowed to… get intimate."
Edward: "And last, but not least: you are not to watch Buffy the Vampire Slaughter!"

30.
Bella: "I guess I always knew Jacob would end up part of my family."
Edward: "Wonderful. Now we have a kid, several cars, a house and a dog. All we need is a swing and the picture's complete."

TBC...