Love Myself

2

Emily sprinted like she was a world-champion track athlete instead of an up-and-coming swim star. To get back to Harrison, she had to cover almost the entire length of the campus, including not one, but two quads. How come no one warned her about Paige and the desperate, aching mess she would constantly be turned into whenever the brunette was around? If she would have known she would have move to the student apartments right across the street from the gym. Where she could have been already. On her bed, knuckles deep inside herself and diving into her fantasies.

Still she ran, hurdling obstacles, running around peers, and, once, running through an unsuspecting girl — who she stopped to help up and apologized profusely to — only a little annoyed by the delay. She was being ridiculous, racing home to fuck herself. But the need was so strong, like she was an addict, and it was only getting worse with time. Every time it was her fingers doing the job, she wanted Paige a little bit more, to feel the weight of her body, to see lust clouding Paige's eyes.

Finally, Harrison House…with the notoriously slow elevator. She took the stairs two at a time, pulling herself along the handrail. She practically barreled through the door to the 12th floor and almost crumbled in frustration when she swung the door open to see her roommate grinning at her.

Her roommate was never — never — home. Emily did her best to smile instead of cringe and act like she wasn't falling apart. Shouldn't you be off screwing your boyfriend with the off-campus housing? Why are you here? Now? At this exact time?

"Hi, Emily, just grabbing some fresh clothes then heading back to Nick's." Her roommate continued to stuff clothes in what little room was left in her backpack. "I'm at his place all the time, but he doesn't like it when I leave a change of clothes there. I don't get it."

Emily laughed awkwardly, never having been good at this everyone-knows-he's-using-you sort of thing. "Guys," she said with a shrug, "…who knows." Please, get out. She grabbed a towel out of the closet, willing to take care of herself in the shower if she didn't get the room to herself soon enough.

Her roommate laughed, her blonde hair bouncing around her shoulders. "All right, I'm off. Kisses."

Still gathering up her toiletries, Emily said her goodbyes without looking up. She had kind of hoped that the run home would have curbed some of her frustration, because she knew this was turning into something out of Swimfan. It didn't, not the run, not the interruptions, not even the thought of being a stalker, because of Paige's words, 'I'd love it if you'd come.' With those words Paige lit a long fuse that was just going to continue sparking until Emily exploded.

She felt a tingle run from her spine to her toes, the throb in her center pounding stronger. All from the thought of Paige's pink lips wrapping around the word "come". "Then you are going to have a lot of love." She stood up and walked to her door, stripping her shirt and bra along the way. Locking it tight, then locking it again just to be sure. Her roommate had a key, of course, but she trusted she would have the rest of the night to herself.

Emily kicked off her shoes while she walked to her iPod and played her favorite song in times like this. As soon as Hustler started to play she smiled and swayed her hips. Closing her eyes for a moment and letting herself imagine Paige was sitting on the bed in front of her. Her hooded, brown eyes raking over Emily's form, her hands clutching the sheets. Of course, Emily would tease her, give her a show, she want Paige to crave it as much as she did. Emily brushed the hair off her shoulders and traced her fingers across her collarbone. Her other hand, pushing her hair back as she continued to dip and rock in time with the song.

Her hand traveled down along her sternum and traced a path down her contracting abdomen. Dipping two fingers into the waistband of her shorts, she paused and smiled as her other hand cupped her breast. She pinched and moaned, her nipples already straining and sensitive.

Paige's mouth, tongue, and teeth on her right now would be sending her over the edge. Causing her to come without even touching her clit. Just her soft, warm mouth and that pink tongue that Emily occasionally gets a peek of, swirling around her aching nipple. Strong hands cupping her breasts.

Emily wondering if Paige would be gentle or rough. Or start out gentle and then get rough. That's the way she wanted her Paige: soft then hard. Equal then dominate. To ease her in and then never let her catch her breath.

Her stomach tightened at the thought, as her swollen clit screamed for attention with its incessant throbbing. Enough teasing. She yanked off the rest of her clothes in one movement and jumped onto her bed.

Sitting on her knees, hips moving on their own accord — rocking against air wishing for friction — she wondered what position Paige would take her in first. On her back? No, that was boring for someone like Paige. Emily smirked because she knew exactly the position Paige would want her in first. She laid down flat on her stomach then pushed back onto her knees, until her round ass wiggled in the air. This position was hell on her shoulders and neck, but the result was ecstasy. Her eager fingers dove into the pool between her legs, parting her lips, and split around her clit. "Paige." The blood drummed in her ears as her mind began to wander to one of her favorite memories…

"Fields, are you okay?"

Emily had stopped in the middle of her laps and was slowly swimming towards the edge of the pool, careful not to further exasperate the cramp she just got in her hamstring. "It's just a cramp, Coach." Emily pulled herself out of the pool and searched for her shorts.

"Let's get McCullers to stretch it for you."

Emily's eyes popped wide. No, no, not Paige. But before she had a chance to protest she heard her coach calling Paige over. Emily quickly threw on some shorts — that may or may not have belonged to her — wanting to be at least a little dressed for this.

"What's going on, Coach?" Paige looked at Emily and smiled her disarming smile. Such an innocent gesture, something friends, and even strangers, do all the time, but all Emily could do was blush and look away. She was sure she heard Paige chuckle softly, but her coach started to talk again.

"Fields, has a cramp. Would you take her in to the training room and help her get it out?"

"Paige, you don't have to, I'm -"

"Sure. Come on, Fields."

Emily paused for a moment, not following, not running away, not moving at all. She was so unsure of what to do. Part of her wanted to pretend like her cramp went away and jump in the pool before anyone could argue. But the loudest part of her body wanted to be alone in the training room with Paige. To feel Paige's hands massaging her skin while she worked the muscle. That and her hamstring really did hurt like a mother f-

"Fields, are you coming?"

"Yeah, yes." Emily hobbled along admiring Paige's butt in her khaki pants.

The training room wasn't the most romantic place. There was a faint scent of disinfectant and band-aids in the air. The lighting was bright and unflattering, but it was empty except for the two of them. It was what Emily had wished for, but now that it was happening she felt nervous. What if something happened? Or worse, what if nothing happened at all? What if Paige called kept calling her Fields and talked about how her girlfriend is a pre-med, sex goddess, who volunteers at an animal shelter…and can bake cheesecake, but never gains a pound. What if Paige reminds her of the importance of stretching and hydrating, then tells her to be careful because she is like a sister to her.

That wouldn't happen. Emily knew they weren't close like sisters, but she wasn't sure about the saint girlfriend.

"Hop up here and lie down on your stomach."

Emily did as she was told and jumped up on the black, vinyl bed, settling her face in the hole in the top pad.

"I'm going to massage the muscle first to relax it. Then we'll stretch and you'll be as good as new."

As soon as she felt Paige get closer, she tensed, tightening ever muscle and refusing to breathe.

"Relax, you're just going to make it worse if you keep your body like that."

Her body was waging a war with her better judgement. All she wanted to do was sit up, wrap her legs around Paige's waist and kiss her until her lungs protest with their need for air. Because it would be so easy — if Paige was running just as low on will power as she was — for them to strip their clothes and discover each other. Both of them forgotten in this little room by everyone else on the outside.

"Emily." The heat from the hand now on her back almost made her whimper. Even through the slightest touch and the small circular pattern, she could feel the strength in that hand. The length of the fingers as she felt the fingertips glide along her suit, adding their own comfort. She imagined how amazing, how filling, those fingers would feel pumping in and out of her. Paige's strong hand gripping her waist as she held her hips down. Pressing her down onto the training table. There would be room enough for the both of them if Paige was directly on top of Emily, and that's exactly how she wanted it.

She was getting lost in her fantasy, but the moment she felt those same fingertips slip over the material of her swimsuit and onto her bare skin she snapped back to reality. It was too much. The room was too small and Paige was too close. Emily jumped off the table, hoping her arousal could pass as embarrassment. "Can we - I just want to stretch and get back out there…please?"

Paige eyed her for a moment, before dipping her head and smiling. "After you," she said, directing Emily to a row of mats on the floor. "Lie down on your back."

Emily assumed the position. She knew the stretch, having witnessed — with a little jealousy - Paige do it to several girls on the team. It was still a little hands on, but at least there wouldn't be any rubbing. Emily just reminded herself that Paige was a physical therapy major and this was her clinic time. She was another patient. Another teammate with an injured…wait-

Normally, Paige kneeled down to the side of whoever she was working on, put a hand on the back of their ankle, put the other hand right above their knee, and pushed the leg back. But Paige settled right inside of Emily's thighs and set the injured leg on her shoulder, holding it there as Emily tried to scoot away.

"You really need to relax. I can tell your whole body is tense right now." Paige shifted forward to close the distance between them. Almost. Her knee was a mere inch from pressing against Emily's center.

Emily wanted so badly to cover that extra inch, to push against Paige, to ride her khaki covered thigh as if nothing was going on. Paige could keep stretching her hamstring while Emily shook and came underneath her, soaking Paige's khakis. She wondered if Paige would even change her pants or she would wear them like a badge. A sign of her ability to make a girl come without even trying.

A quiet moan slipped passed her lips when she felt hands wrap around her thigh and thumbs kneed the cramped muscle.

"Feel good?"

Emily nodded and focused on the hands expertly working the her leg. Those hands would work every inch of her body with just as much skill. And God, how she wanted to be worked.

She gasped when Paige leaned forward a little, bringing Emily's knee closer to her own chest, and Paige's knee closer to where she needed it.

"Too much?" Paige's tone was warm and deep and it settled right in Emily's mind.

Not enough. "No, it feels good." Emily could feel herself starting to soak the possibly borrowed shorts she was wearing. She didn't want Paige to know. At least not to find out this way. On instinct she moved to close her thighs, but Paige put her hand on her good leg and held it down.

"Keep this one down. It'll feel better."

Paige pushed forward again, this time rubbing the heel of her hand up and down the length of Emily's leg. Each time pushing the boundaries of what can still be considered a massage.

"Paige." Emily tilted her back, losing herself, unaware of the fact her hips were undulating ever so slightly.

"Emily?" Paige pushed forward even more, until the top of Emily's thigh was touching her breast. Emily knew her tiny shorts wouldn't be keeping any of her secrets now, not that it mattered. She wasn't even keeping her own secrets. She closed her eyes and let her body do the work. Her hand snaked down and grabbed ahold of Paige's polo shirt, bunching the material in her palm, slowly untucking it. The movement of her hips a little more obvious now, trying to achieve the occasional brush from Paige's thigh. She'd gasp whenever it happened, something quiet and little, even though she didn't care. She didn't care if Paige knew anymore. She would scream it from the diving board that she wanted to get fucked by Paige McCullers. Take her out to dinner then fuck again. See a movie then fuck again. Spend the day in bed, reading the newspaper to each other then make love. Yeah, okay, she wasn't an animal.

Goosebumps covered her skin where a bold hand had been traveling up her leg. Fingers spread wide, covering as much skin as they could until she felt the thumb toy with the hem of her bathing suit.

"Emily?"

Yes, yes, a million times yes.

"How's it going in here girls?"

Paige's hand was back to her knee so fast, Emily wondered if she had imagined the whole thing. Maybe she fell asleep and her mind was playing a cruel trick on her. That had to be it.

"It's going well, Coach, she's almost done. Just a few more minutes."

"Good. Practice is over so once you guys are done in here, head home. Good night."

"Good night," Paige said.

Emily was still too stunned to speak. It felt so real. The whole thing, how could she have imagined it? She stood up, her trembling legs almost collapsing underneath her, but she needed to get away. "I'm sorry."

"You don't have to go and you definitely don't need to apologize. Maybe we could-"

"No." Emily caught sight of Paige's wrinkled, untucked shirt. She had done that just wanting to feel Paige's skin. She lost her mind. "I have to go."

"Em -"

Her fingers circled her clit faster and faster, ass starting to shake in the air. Maybe some of that day had been imagined, she didn't know, but what she knew for sure was Paige had been above her, pressing into some part of her, opening her up even if it was just to fix her leg. And that was a feeling she couldn't forget.

Hers hips bucked as the circles became sloppy. Blood rushed to her clit, a light layer of sweat covering her skin. "Fuck, Paige. Do it to me."

Heat coiled low in her stomach like a gun anxiously waiting for its trigger pull. Emily pumped and pumped, her tired arm burning with pain. Hips twitching, breath gasping, her trigger went off, firing blood and shocks through every muscle, bone, fiber in her wrecked body. "Paige, fuck, yes!" Her come rushing out of her, coating her hand and wrist.

She collapsed on her wrinkled bed sheets while her orgasm continued to assault every inch of her.

"Enough teasing." She was far from satisfied. Sure she'd had an orgasm, but she wanted more. She wanted Paige. As she stretched her naked, tan body across her bed, she thought of the perfect time to make her fantasy real.