In chapter two we find out who rescued Taehyung and learn a little about the world he currently finds himself in.
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Once outside of the room where the fledgling sleeps, he heaves a heavy sigh and wonders how it's possible for everything to have devolved into such a mess so quickly.
Numerous thoughts begin to occur to him then, but he just shakes his head in order to clear it of the useless path that his mind wants to go down. Because, right now, he first and foremost needs to get a hold of the current situation and he can't do that while consumed by wild speculation.
He sighs again, then pats his cheeks, slapping his face lightly with both hands.
Alright, he thinks, where is my phone?
He knows that he'd dropped it at some point, and then remembers, that in his earlier rush, it had been at the door, and so he starts making his way there. As he's walking, a noise, like that of someone repeatedly entering the wrong entrance passcode, reaches him. He stops, momentarily surprised. Then before another attempt can be made, he rushes over to open the door.
"Namjoon!" the person on the other side yells, startled. They recover quickly, though. And eager to be out of the sun, simply squeeze past him and then disappear into the house.
Namjoon stays put, blinks once, then goes about closing the door. "Why can't we just stick to one code for all the safehouses?!" he hears called back to him.
"Jimin, where have you been?" he asks instead, whilst idly listening to the heavy door as it bolts tightly shut.
Jimin responds, "You sound annoyed, but I'm the one who's called you at least ten times now, since hearing your voicemail." His voice echoes as it bounces through the halls, but Namjoon knows he's somewhere in the kitchen.
Satisfied that sunlight can't enter the house anymore, Namjoon turns away from the door and quickly picks his phone up, finding that it's where he'd expected it'd be. Glancing at it, he quickly confirms Jimin's words. He grunts, but says nothing as he makes his way into the kitchen.
"After the third or fourth missed call, I figured I'd need to find you in person, but I didn't know where you were," Jimin says mindlessly, while rummaging through the fridge. He ducks down, momentarily, out of sight. "I checked a couple other safe houses before coming here," he adds, then pops his head up from behind the fridge door to look at Namjoon.
Namjoon's leaning tiredly on the wall at the edge of the kitchen entrance. He hasn't said anything and he's frowning, which speaks volumes to Jimin, so he just turns away to look back inside the fridge again.
Finding what he wants, Jimin straightens and then closes the fridge door with an ankle. "So, what's going on?" he asks Namjoon, then bites into the bag he'd retrieved from the fridge.
"Isn't that shit cold?" Namjoon asks with disgust, ignoring Jimin's question for the moment. Jimin just shrugs, unbothered.
Sighing tiredly, Namjoon turns and quietly exits the kitchen. He makes his way into the livingroom and then drops himself onto a leather couch. He looks up when, not long after, Jimin plops down on the couch across from him. Neither say anything.
"Namjoon, why didn't you pick up any of my calls?"
Namjoon isn't sure how he's supposed to answer Jimin's question, because he doesn't exactly understand the situation himself. Then, after some consideration, he figures he might as well start at the beginning and says, "I ran across a fledgling in the city."
Jimin straightens up in his seat, full attention on Namjoon. "Here? But there weren't any orders for-" Namjoon cuts him off, "No, it wasn't one that needed hunting down."
Jimin relaxes a little hearing that, but then he's confused. "Ok" he says, prompting the other to explain himself.
At a loss for words, Namjoon looks off to the side and away from Jimin. He's trying to order his thoughts, but it's difficult, because he's still swimming after losing so much blood earlier. Then, all at once, words just begin to spill out of him. "This fledgling… He was-it was, you'd have to have seen him to understand. I'd never seen one so near death-so neglected. It was terrible."
The sudden emotionality in Namjoon's voice surprises Jimin, who hasn't seen this side of him in a long time. It makes him curious about what could elicit such a strong response from the other.
Could a dying fledgling really be the cause, he wonders. Maybe, after all, it's rare that a fledgling not be cared for. In fact, most are covetously attended to for the entirety of their short lifespan. At least, that had been the norm for millennia. Still, even as was the case recently, at the very least, fledgling were cared for until they could survive independently. It was yet unheard of to completely abandon bloodborne.
Jimin shakes his head, confused. "And his maker?" he asks.
"Nowhere," Namjoon responds in a grave tone, as he meets Jimin's eyes. Jimin frowns and Namjoon adds, "I don't know who they are. I asked him, but he started talking about his mom," then he stops abruptly, as a deep furrow comes over his brow in thought.
If it were anyone else telling him this, Jimin might think that they were messing with him.
"I found him lying outside in an alley." Namjoon says and to Jimin it sounds like a non-sequitur, but he makes no comment. He just watches as Namjoon quiets and then as his jaw tenses visibly. "It was hours after daybreak," he finally grits out and Jimin winces, realizing what Namjoon means.
"I didn't think our kind could abandon their fledglings-especially to die like that," Namjoon adds, after a moment. Equally aghast, they both grow quiet.
Then Jimin looks at Namjoon, really looks at him. And he finds that there's a deep and genuine sadness in his eyes that has no business being there. Because, no matter how sad it is to see a fledgling abandoned, left to die a cruel death, the fact remains that Namjoon shouldn't feel so much sorrow over some misfortunate fledgling with whom he never shared blood or bond with. Jimin can understand empathy, of course he can, but there's no real reason Namjoon should care this much.
"We're living in a very strange time," Jimin murmurs half to himself and half to Namjoon. He stares at him a minute longer, then sighs and leans back in his seat. He runs a heavy hand through his hair.
While slouching on the couch now, Jimin considers everything Namjoon has shared with him. "I haven't heard something that sad in a long time," he admits truthfully, while staring up at the ceiling. "I hope the poor thing's somewhere better now," he adds as an afterthought.
Then before Jimin can launch into a full, bona fide moment of silence, Namjoon corrects him, "I don't know about better exactly, but he is, currently, in the third bedroom." His eyes are glassy and he's staring at a spot on the coffee table in front of him. He'd spoken without much thought.
Hearing the other's words, Jimin jolts up and out of his slouch, then snaps Namjoon with a disbelieving look, who just ignores him and continues to stare at the same spot with eyes that have a far-away look to them.
Jimin knows Namjoon is no liar, knows it's entirely out of character for this to be some kind of joke, but nonetheless, right now, he needs Namjoon to reconfirm these things for him. "What do you mean?" he asks, but Namjoon doesn't respond and Jimin just stares at him, frustrated by his sudden reticence.
Growing more frustrated, Jimin's about to snap at Namjoon, demand he explain himself, but then Namjoon looks at him and just like that, he knows what the other is trying to say.
"Check for yourself," the steadiness in his gaze says.
So, Jimin does as he's asked and focuses on what he can hear. For a few moments, he listens carefully to every minute noise he can find throughout the safe house.
A quiet, gentle breath fills his ears. Someone is sound asleep in one of the rooms. The third bedroom, to be precise.
Namjoon watches as Jimin listens, then as his eyes begin to widen until they almost seem like they're about to pop out of his head altogether. It's a funny sight. And if Namjoon weren't so drained, so tired, he imagines his own eyes might be just as wide after a night like this.
"But I thought-" Jimin begins saying, but Namjoon quickly stops him by speaking over him with a slew of his own words. "I know. I know," Namjoon says tiredly, though words are still tumbling out of him quickly. "But I just, I couldn't and I didn't know what to do," he says, almost sounding drunk. None of it is making sense to Jimin.
Namjoon's eyes are scanning the surface of the coffee table, quickly roving over it as if in search of words. He takes a quick breath, then blurts out, "I gave him human blood first. But, God, he's so young, it didn't take."
"What do you mean first?"
"First human... then I gave him mine-" Jimin explodes completely out of his seat, cutting Namjoon off.
"You WHAT?!" Jimin half yells, managing just barely to keep himself in check, because it's still Namjoon he's speaking to. Jimin's eyes close in utter disbelief. He has to take a breath, before looking at Namjoon again. "So, he's Kim descended?"
"Maybe?"
"Maybe?!"
Jimin is frozen. His eyes are locked with Namjoon's and Jimin really hates that Namjoon looks just as confused as he feels, because it isn't fair. Namjoon doesn't get to be confused, he should have answers. But instead, he's just sat there, looking all exhausted and worn down, like he's given up.
Jimin comes to a startling realization then, this entire situation is way beyond Namjoon. And he almost wants to laugh, because what hope does he have of understanding any of this if even Namjoon has no clue?
Truthfully, Jimin's appalled by what he's heard, as well as, brimming with confusion for why Namjoon had done what he had. But he knows that all of this is of no use to the situation. His feelings alone won't accomplish anything and it's this thought that allows him to calm down. He exhales a large breath and a moment later, sits back down.
Then, Jimin levels Namjoon with a careful look. "The Kim haven't had fledglings for millennia now, none of the pureblood families have," he states. Namjoon nods in agreement and Jimin frowns, confused.
"Then how or why did you figure he was a Kim?"
Namjoon sighs and then attempts to explain himself. "When I asked him, he told me his name was Kim Taehyung." Jimin scoffs and he's about to protest, but Namjoon holds up a hand in gesture, asking him to listen.
When Jimin complies, Namjoon adds, "Look, I know what it sounds like, but I also had no other information to go off of. Frankly, I didn't know what to do or what to think, so I shared my blood with him and hoped for the best."
Namjoon leans back into the couch where he's sat, allowing himself the luxury of acknowledging, for once, how exhausted he really feels. This doesn't escape Jimin's notice.
"You're fucking drained, aren't you?"
Jimin's eyes are too sharp to lie to, and given that it is Jimin, then the question had likely been rhetorical anyway, so Namjoon doesn't bother with a response. It's all self evident enough for Jimin, he thinks and then lets his eyes slide shut, promising himself it's only for a moment. He sinks further into the couch then, because keeping up appearances is exhausting and he doesn't care for it at the moment.
As Namjoon's lightly resting, he begins to spiral down several trains of thought. Then, though it'd been his intention from the beginning not to burden the other with unnecessary information, something within him figures he might as well tell Jimin what had honestly happened.
"He drank his fill, drained me of more than I had anticipated, then threw most of it back up, before showering and going to bed," Namjoon says, all in one breath.
Stunned by this information and by Namjoon's sudden, forthcoming attitude, Jimin's mouth drops slightly agape. He blinks, eyes fluttering quickly with surprise. Then he asks, "So, wait, he rejected Kim blood, but…he's alive?" and watches as Namjoon opens his tired eyes to look at him.
Still in a deep slouch, Namjoon half-heartedly shrugs. "An incomplete rejection?" he responds, an unspoken 'maybe' is left implied.
Namjoon looks away from Jimin. His eyes wander down the length of the main hall. "I don't know what's going on, but he's resting now. We'll get answers when he wakes," he says, then gets lost in thought again.
This provides Jimin with another opportunity to quietly study him and he notes, first, how odd it is to see Namjoon like this: devoid of his trademark composure and so out of his element, but most of all, so unapologetically open about it. It makes Jimin wonder when he'd last seen anyone so openly display an honest state of self. He feels a sudden reminiscence then and Jimin thinks that, in this moment, Namjoon looks younger, like he's let go of something that's unknowingly been aging him, allowing him to unfurl into a simpler version of himself.
Or maybe he's just suffering from blood loss, Jimin thinks wryly as Namjoon starts to drift off.
"Namjoon, you've gotta feed and then you can get some rest," Jimin says. Namjoon hums and cracks an eyelid open to look at Jimin, but then doesn't move.
Namjoon blinks and Jimin is gone. Grumbling, he sits up quickly, so that he can catch the bag that's wordlessly tossed at him not a second later. He shoots Jimin a look and in a sarcastic tone says, "Good, if you slowed down any, the bag might accidentally warm."
Jimin ignores the comment and just looks at him impatiently instead. And Namjoon, too tired to put up a one-sided fight, simply gives it up and with a grimace, begins to drink from the cold bag. He's done in moments and, immediately, he feels the blood's effect as it spreads through him. It isn't enough and he won't entirely be back to himself for a while longer, but it's enough for now and he's feeling better. He nods to Jimin once in thanks and then stands and starts to make his way towards a bedroom, since it's still day out and he should get some rest.
But just before leaving the room, Namjoon stops and spares a look at Jimin, who's idly stretching his arms and also seemingly planning to get some rest. "What were your orders anyway?" he asks.
Jimin drops his arms and turns to look at him. "Hmm? Oh," he says, "you know, just the same old, execute some errant fledgling." However, it's clear from the other's expression, that the answer he's given has nothing to do with what Namjoon's really asking about. And realizing this, Jimin adds, "Uh, then, after that..."
"Yoongi asked me to cover ground," Jimin adds tersely, after a slight pause. His mouth closes into a hard line.
The growing tension in Jimin's jaw causes Namjoon to quirk up an eyebrow. "Yea, I'm aware of that, he called to tell me, but that's all he had time to say: that you were covering ground and needed help." This doesn't prompt Jimin to explain himself as Namjoon had hoped it would. He notes, though, that in any case, Jimin's jaw is so tense that he looks like he'd struggle to say anything even if he wanted to.
The line of Jimin's body is rigid and his eyes are locked angrily on a spot a few feet in front of him. Seeing this, Namjoon doesn't think it's wise to press him for an answer right away. So he gives him some time. But despite how obviously upset Jimin is, eventually, Namjoon can't help but lose his patience, when the silence stretches on too long.
Namjoon tries his best to not bark out, when he says, "Jimin, I'm the help, so I need to know why or what it was you're covering ground for." And in response to his words, Jimin huffs out a loud, unexpected breath and then begins to laugh dryly to himself. Frowning, Namjoon asks, "What? What's so funny?"
Jimin runs a quick hand through his hair. "A corpse," he says suddenly and then pointedly avoids meeting Namjoon's eyes. His head begins shaking slightly from side to side, at his own words. And then his fingers find purchase on the upholstery of a nearby couch and he starts to scratch lightly at it.
Namjoon throws Jimin a confused look. "What?" he asks and watches as the other starts roughly picking at a thread, pulling it loose from the couch's stitching.
"The fledgling I had orders on had a taste for unapproved humans-a lot of college kids," Jimin says. "Before I got rid of it, the sick thing had returned to the graveside of one of its victims. Dug the body out."
And that wasn't something Namjoon had ever expected to hear.
After a moment, Namjoon says, exasperated, "Of course it did." Mentally, he adds this anomaly to the growing list in his mind and then rubs at his right temple wearily.
Not for the first time, Namjoon wonders if he's really qualified for his job.
But if he is or isn't, either way, he knows it makes no difference. This job, this role, and in life, all he can ever really hope to do is just his best. At least, these days, that's what he's been telling himself with an increasing frequency.
Sighing, Namjoon mentally gathers himself up and tries to focus on what's currently at hand. There's something in particular that Jimin had implied that's bothering him, so he figures he should start there. Though, truthfully, Namjoon's half convinced he'd misheard, because the implication is somewhat ludicrous if he hasn't.
Namjoon clears his throat. "Jimin, are you telling me you were told to go looking for a disinterred human corpse?" he asks and inadvertently it comes out sounding like an accusation of Jimin lying. Unsurprisingly, after Namjoon's misstep, the other doesn't dignify him with a response, though, the sound of leather ripping, as Jimin drags his nails deeply across the couch, is really answer enough.
And, well at least now Namjoon could understand why Jimin was being so closed lipped about his orders. Rubbing a hand over his forehead, Namjoon takes a moment to really get into his role. He has a job to do after all. Wearily, he asks, "Alright, what can you tell me about the fledgling?"
But, being as unhelpful as possible, Jimin just shrugs in response, while looking at the tear he's made, and Namjoon pinches the bridge of his nose in irritation. "Digging up an old kill is not normal fledgling behavior, even for an out of control one. And you can't tell me anything about it?" Then, in a tone that he immediately regrets, Namjoon asks, "Did you not bother to look into it or something?"
Jimin is quick to snap back. "I didn't stop to ask it questions! I did my job and I did what needed to be done." Then he huffs, irritated that Namjoon and this entire situation have managed to get under his skin. He hates snapping at others, hates getting this worked up.
Admittedly, though, Jimin knows he isn't helping things along either. Earlier, Namjoon had freely and honestly communicated with him. He'd also shown a part of himself that Jimin didn't think he'd ever see again. And thus far, he's done nothing to reciprocate in kind.
Sighing, Jimin crosses his arms over his chest and then inhales and exhales deeply through his nose. "Besides," he says, roughly, "I didn't even know about the corpse, until…" He stops and huffs in irritation, then runs a hand through his hair for the nth time that day.
Jimin looks up in an attempt to speak levelly. Blinking up at the ceiling, he says, "I was reporting to Yoongi, I thought I was about to head home, so imagine my surprise when I found out there was a whole part two to the job."
"Part two? Wait," Namjoon says, as his brow furrows, "you weren't told everything upfront?"
Jimin gives Namjoon a hard look. "If I'd known about the corpse, do you honestly think I wouldn't have looked into the fledgling?" And Namjoon's eyes have to quickly flick away from Jimin's then, because, yes, he knows how thorough the other is and he was wrong to have made any insinuations to the contrary earlier.
"I was sent out with half the pertinent information," Jimin says and there's an uncharacteristic amount of edge to his voice.
Frowning at a far wall, Namjoon murmurs to himself, "When did we start withholding information from each other?" And then, louder, he says, "It was irresponsible to send you out like that."
Meeting Jimin's eyes, he adds, "I understand why you'd be upset."
Jimin nods, feeling slightly vindicated. Then he looks thoughtful for a moment and inhales as though he's about to say something, but stops right before a single word can leave his mouth. Namjoon looks at him strangely.
Jimin hesitates for another moment and then finally says, "But, ...if I'm being honest." He stops though. Because, aloud, Jimin thinks that the words sound strange. They're both too big and too small for the silence of the living room.
But Jimin is determined, so he coughs once and then continues, "It's Jungkook. That's what upset me the most."
"Do you mean his orders?" Namjoon asks, confused, and then adds, "Or has something happened? Did he-"
Jimin interrupts him. "No, and he's pretty much like you saw him last," he says, as he eyes the tattered mess he's made of the couch. The corners of his lips pull down in a frown, but he looks more confused than upset. "I wish you could have seen him."
"Before daybreak today, he, himself, came here to fetch Yoongi for the council meeting." Jimin's eyebrows furrow, as he adds, "I've never seen him so impatient and jumpy."
"He looked tired, but restless at the same time-kept looking around everywhere." Jimin pauses. "I think something's wrong with him," he says.
When Jimin looks back at Namjoon again, he can see that the gears are already turning in the other's head. And he has to hide a small, relieved smile at the sight, because he'd been worried that his concerns would be met by dismissal. It's in moments like these that Jimin's reminded Namjoon hadn't been made the Court's leader for nothing. Namjoon is a great leader, because he is many things, but chief amongst these he is first and foremost smart and kind. Their Court is lucky to have him.
But then, Jimin thinks, as he looks at the weight of Namjoon's shoulders, how they bunch and how Namjoon unconsciously squeezes at them to release their tension, that great leaders can only do so much on their own. And Namjoon doesn't have a team, because the court hasn't been a team for a while.
And maybe, he thinks, that means he needs to do a little better, needs to do a little more than just reciprocate.
Jimin considers this thought for a moment. He bites at the inside of his cheek and then takes a couple determined steps in Namjoon's direction, until he's standing at arm's distance. Namjoon looks at him in surprise.
"I think Yoongi is concerned," Jimin starts, then stops. "No, the truth is he is concerned, we all are. " He's looking at Namjoon with an open and earnest expression that's daring him to say otherwise.
And Namjoon would be lying if he did, so he keeps quiet. "Yoongi, uh, his patience is starting to wear real thin," Jimin says, losing some steam but still speaking with candor. It doesn't help that Namjoon is looking at him with something akin to trepidation in his eyes.
Jimin takes a deep breath and plows forward anyway, determined, because teamwork and honest communication have to be fought for sometimes. So he begins by saying, "You see.. It's cause Yoongi's a straightforward guy and he hasn't said so, but I know he hates this whole mess, because there's nothing straightforward about it." But then Jimin stops, realizing that he's using a truth about Yoongi's character to express his own frustrations.
"He hates this whole mess-" Jimin starts again, then pauses once more. He clears his throat, but the words still won't come out, so clears it again. " I hate this whole mess," he finally says, voice quiet, "and I'm not just talking about anything that's happened today."
"None of us have said as much, but I can feel it," Jimin adds, avoiding the look on Namjoon's face, because it's too much to bear right now. "What we've become, this isn't going to fix itself and we keep letting Jungkook skirt around it." Jimin ignores the voice in his head that scoffs at his own cowardice, how he's shirked the burden of his own blame, because it's not just Jungkook, they're all complicit.
Namjoon can feel his face warming. And he knows that if he checked, he'd find that his chest is flushed red, hot with a deep shame and embarrassment. Because Jimin's words are a sharp reminder of how, since waking, he's failed his team at every turn and, worse yet, how he's never once tried to rectify their path since it'd gone astray. Instead, he's been content to pretend, as well as, allow the others to pretend that what had become of them was just what destiny had writ and that there was nothing to be done about it.
Jimin is right, this won't fix itself, wasn't ever going to fix itself, but still Namjoon had allowed it to fester. And yea, part of him knows everyone had played a part, but as their leader, he thinks that he's the only one truly at blame. He's done wrong.
He doesn't want to continue doing wrong.
Jimin's words have exposed a part of his mind that had been hidden, buried under a mountain of matters and responsibilities of greater importance—excuses. And Something in Namjoon's heart can't bear to bury it a second time.
However, he also can't bear the idea of messing things up further, so he stays quiet, afraid that he'll start making excuses for himself if he opens his mouth.
But staying silent, he realizes, would just be repeating the same mistake. Namjoon doesn't have the right words to say though.
Without any thought, Namjoon's arm lurches forward, too quick and somewhat jerky, but he doesn't take the action back, follows it through until his hand is resting on Jimin's shoulder. Jimin jumps a little in surprise and turns a wide-eyed look on him. They stare at each other. But still Namjoon doesn't say anything.
And he isn't going to, because he doesn't know which of the thousands of words that fill his mind will express what he feels most accurately, most faithfully. He's afraid of being misunderstood, but most of all, he's afraid of the possibility that they're no longer even able to understand one another.
It hadn't always been like this. They'd been slowly poisoned into it.
It had started five years ago. Tension had invaded their system not long after their waking. None of them could have possibly expected it, and so none of them had known how to fight it. Free to spread, it had attacked their throats first, making the muscle there too rigid and tight to talk. Undisrupted by what they could have said, what they should have said, a heaviness had then began to grow in their chests, in their hearts. Unchecked, it grew bigger and bigger, every time they had looked at one another.
They'd been as one before, their minds and hearts transparent to each other. The poison had changed that. It had fragmented them, then scattered the pieces in different directions. And naturally, the distances between their scattered remains had increased with time.
Namjoon had watched it happen, had seen them drift apart. But he'd done nothing. He'd just stopped at the thought that it was both funny and cruel that the law of entropy could apply to their hearts and figured there was nothing to be done against the laws of nature.
Perhaps, he'd been wrong.
The silence between Namjoon and Jimin is awkward. They're still staring at each other, equally unsure and unfamiliar of the territory they've just entered.
But Namjoon's sharing this pivotal moment with Jimin and so he has to wonder if this is fate finally conspiring in their favor. Out of all people, Jimin's privy to landscapes others can only imagine. He's keenly empathetic and so he knows what Namjoon is trying to say, even when he lacks the words to do so.
Namjoon thinks that, on some level, Jimin understands the whole of their situation better than anyone else, because, no one else had watched as closely as he had when the tethers of their relationship had loosened over time. Jimin, he thinks, had felt as they came apart with an intensity no one else had, had to endure.
And really, Namjoon should have seen this day coming. He should have known Jimin would one day speak up. He should have known this conversation was inevitable. He should have. He should have.
He's plagued by "should have's". But he's starting to think that, maybe, that's just a normal consequence of any life lived.
So he vows to learn to accept their presence and continue moving forward anyway.
Namjoon squeezes Jimin's shoulder and their shared eye contact settles into something less uncomfortable, more familiar.
Jimin exhales, relieved by Namjoon's quiet but positive response and Namjoon lets go of his shoulder. Shy, they can't help but look away from each other again.
"Uh, and also, I guess, you should probably know," Jimin says, in part because he's unable to stand the awkward quiet that has descended over them and in part because he thinks Namjoon should know, "Yoongi may have indirectly confronted Jungkook earlier."
Namjoon's brow furrows. Any earlier embarrassment is shed away, as he turns to look at Jimin. "What do you mean?" he asks cautiously.
Jimin rubs at the back of his neck. "He asked Jungkook if he wanted to do a quick search, phrased it like they'd be doing me a favor, helping me out. But it was pretty apparent what he was getting at."
"He was making light of Jungkook's orders, by asking him to spend time searching for a human corpse," Namjoon says, running a hand down his face. "He taunted Jungkook and then Jungkook did what Jungkook does, right?" Jimin nods.
Namjoon's eyes close and he drops his head back. When he opens them again, he's looking up at the ceiling. For a moment, he tries to find hidden answers or guidance, or both, in its texture. But all he comes up with is that, despite everything, they really aren't a whole lot different from who they used to be: boys who'd pick on each other for fun. And he thinks, maybe their biggest mistake had been attempting to pretend any different. They're still those boys at heart. They'd just convinced themselves otherwise, in order to cope with the burden of their new responsibilities.
Everyone's the same, he thinks, except now everyone's wearing masks of their own creation, so that they can play at being whatever they think it means to be an 'adult'.
Jimin laughs lightly. The airy tinkle of it shocks Namjoon into looking at him. "Imagine if he'd known that look back then," Jimin says with a small smile. Namjoon is confused, but then he realizes what Jimin's referring to and wonders how the other had guessed his thoughts so closely.
But then he thinks, it's Jimin, of course he had.
"You know, that look, the one he's learned since waking," Jimin adds and Namjoon smiles, imagining adult Jungkook's favorite expression on the little runt of a boy that Jungkook once was.
The atmosphere quickly sobers, though, when Jimin suddenly frowns in memory. "That look, it's more impassive, colder, everytime I see it," he says.
Namjoon watches intently, as Jimin appears to grow thoughtful over something.
"But earlier," Jimin says, still mulling over his thoughts, "when he pulled that look on Yoongi, for a split second I swear I could see something feint, like ghostlike tracings of where it's beginning to crack."
"What do you mean?"
"I don't know, it was really quick," Jimin says, running a hand through his hair. "For a second, he looked like glass that was moments away from shattering and then in the next second, he was gone. He'd flickered away, without a word."
Jimin frowns, still in thought. "He was in such a hurry to get away."
It isn't clear yet how, but this has to be significant, Namjoon thinks. Jungkook's behavior is strange, growing stranger still. And Namjoon doesn't see how it's coincidental that strange behavior has recently begun to pop up all over their society as well.
Namjoon's mind is whirring. He's trying to make sense of what he's heard, what he's seen today, of all that has come before, but it's difficult and he's growing frustrated. Everytime he attempts to couple any two pieces of information together, nothing makes sense anymore. Everything is too scattered. Putting together a larger picture is impossible.
He must be missing something, or at least he hopes that's the case, because otherwise he doesn't think he'll ever figure this out. No, not as such, especially with the many, recent societal aberrations that were reducing the working foundation of his logic and rendering large parts of it unreliable.
He can't begin to predict or understand behavior and motivation, if the age-old norms of their society and their very nature were no longer applicable to some.
Nothing makes sense to Namjoon anymore and it's kind of a novel experience for him. He doesn't like it.
"Namjoon, I know we put a lot on you, but you shouldn't burden yourself with all of this alone," Jimin says, bringing Namjoon out of his thoughts. He's looking at him with concern.
Namjoon doesn't know what to say. After all, he can't very well stop himself from thinking or worrying and as much as he thinks Jimin's words over, he can't find any reason he shouldn't burden himself either.
The small corners of Jimin's lips pull up in humor and his eyes wrinkle slightly, as he does his best to hold in a laugh. If someone were to look at Namjoon right now, they might think he's busy differentiating a function in his head, one that's particularly tough at that.
Jimin thinks it's endearing. "Oh, Joon," he says on a small giggle.
Hearing the nickname, Namjoon blinks, stunned. It's been a long time since someone called him by that name.
"Joon," Jimin says again, as if he's testing the name out. "At the very least, you can't be the only one thinking yourself in circles. We all gotta start putting our heads together again. We work better that way," he says.
Namjoon blinks again, several times, then nods in a stilted, but enthusiastic manner. "Yea, that's," he says, trying to hold back a smile, "yea, I agree." Then, despite his efforts, the floodgates bust open and he beams warmly at Jimin, who smiles back just as happily. And for a moment, they just smile at one another without reservation, like they're boys all over again.
"Ok," Jimin says clapping his hands lightly together, blissful with this newfound sense of camaraderie, so much so, that he has to pause and think for a moment, before saying, "Uh, well, since we're putting our heads together, why do you think Jungkook wants the missing corpse of a human found?"
"Jimin how is that putting our heads together? Do you have your own theory or are you just asking for mine?"
Jimin's shoulders raise a little, making it so he's hunching, and he smiles guiltily. There's a bit of an accusation in the way Namjoon's looking at him, but he doesn't say anything more, just waits for Jimin to respond.
Jimin snaps his fingers once, then turning them into finger guns, points them at Namjoon. "No, I don't. But also you're the smart one," he says.
Namjoon sighs wearily and rubs at his forehead, dragging the hand down to cover his eyes.
"Fine," Jimin whines. "Actually, I do have one. But it's dumb." Namjoon frowns at him.
"Whatever it is, say it. You notice more than you realize," he replies emphatically.
Jimin considers this for a moment, then purses his lips, "I think…, but no, no," he pauses. "Nevermind, Joon."
Namjoon gives him a look, Jimin sighs. "Ok, ok," he says. "Something about Jungkook's behavior makes me think...," Jimin starts out, but he pauses again. He sighs. "I don't know, but it's almost like he needs this corpse to be found and it's for reasons he may or may not understand."
"And," Jimin adds, "I think either way, he doesn't think we'd be able to understand him, so he's afraid to talk about it."
"But it's just a gut feeling, I have nothing to validate why I think this," Jimin finishes.
And though Jimin may not have anything to validate his thoughts, for Namjoon, Jimin's gut feeling is validation enough.
"The crazy thing is, part of me really wants to find this thing for him," Jimin says, almost as an aside. And confused by his words, all of Namjoon's thoughts come to an abrupt halt.
Jimin rubs the back of his neck self-consciously. "You know, because it might help him, might fix whatever's wrong," he says.
"How would a human, a dead one, make any difference?" Namjoon asks.
Jimin blushes lightly and shrugs. "Just another gut feeling," he answers and then adds, "It's dumb," with a small, self-deprecating laugh.
Namjoon blinks. And for once, he's not so sure he trusts Jimin's gut feeling entirely. "It's not in our nature to care for humans, much less ones that are dead. Their existence is largely irrelevant to us," he says, somewhat philosophically, so as not to dismiss Jimin entirely. Still, his words cause Jimin to grow more embarrassed.
"But," Namjoon adds, while looking at Jimin, "to quote a friend, 'We're living in a very strange time.'" And Jimin smiles softly, shyly at Namjoon, who's just called him a friend.
Still somewhat flustered by Namjoon's sincerity, the next thing Jimin says is just the first thing to cross his mind. "I'm glad we ended up on the same demeaning task of looking for a half rotten kid."
"Jimin," Namjoon immediately chastises and the other reflexively roll his eyes. "What's demeaning is to have your burial site disturbed," he says. "And it doesn't matter the species, a disturbed burial is always disrespectful. It's sad, in fact."
"Namjoon, you know what I mean though," Jimin responds. "I know it's sad, but this case is sad in the same way a dog digging up the bunny it killed is sad," he explains and looks at Namjoon, until he nods, reluctantly conceding him this point.
"Fine, to us at least. The bunnies, however, might feel different," Namjoon says.
"I imagine they might, but that still doesn't make me feel any different," Jimin quips back, confused by whatever point Namjoon is trying to make. "Why does it matter?"
Namjoon raises a placating hand. "It doesn't really. Except that, in this case, it would benefit us to stop and consider how the bunnies feel." Jimin looks at him confused. "What I mean is," Namjoon explains, "if humans come across this corpse before we do, it might present an issue."
Jimin still looks confused. Namjoon sighs. "If humans find it, they won't ignore it. They'll move it and put it in a morgue, then cremate it or rebury it. And who knows where that might be or if we'll ever find it." Jimin responds with a soft 'oh'.
Then, realizing how difficult their task could potentially be, Namjoon pinches the bridge of his nose. "And all of this mess, because someone decided to make a fledgling, only to later abdicate their responsibility over it." Namjoon huffs out a large breath, irritated.
"Why does anyone ever choose to make a fledgling?" Namjoon mumbles to himself. Jimin knows Namjoon's being rhetorical, but he shrugs anyways.
"They're genetic dead ends!" Namjoon says in irritation. "Nothing good ever comes from hybrid offspring. I don't understand some people's fascination with them. I mean, they're too riddled with genetic mutations to even live past a century or two!"
Jimin listens in quiet amusement, as Namjoon rants and when he finally finishes speaking, he comments, "That's a very Pureblood thing of you to say." Namjoon just gives him a look and this causes Jimin to laugh. "What? It was," he says, between giggles.
Then, Jimin sighs and gently places a hand on Namjoon's shoulder. "Joon, for now let's focus on the fact that we're racing humans to find the corpse and they're not even looking for anything." He says this in an attempt to settle Namjoon, who's prone to spiraling out in frustration after considering all the possible problems they might face.
"This corpse has been missing for about a week and no one's come across it yet," Jimin says. "So let's not worry about whether it's been moved, cause it probably hasn't."
Namjoon takes a steadying breath. "Right," he says, nodding in agreement. "The fledgling probably stashed it somewhere."
"Yea, the kid's just waiting to be found," Jimin says and nods back at Namjoon, as if he's just stated the obvious.
"It's not like he can wander around in his condition," Jimin adds and they both stop nodding at each other, so that they can laugh. It isn't really that funny, but there's years worth of tension that needs releasing.
"Yea, yea, you're right," Namjoon says, between chuckles.
When they sober, Namjoon looks at Jimin and says, "We should get some rest, we're both tired and the sun won't be down for a couple more hours. And who know what lies ahead."
Jimin quickly agrees with a short yawn and then, without further incident, they make their way into empty bedrooms and tuck in for a couple hours of rest.
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