Part 2
"Screw it, this is something I need to do in person" I thought to myself as I put on my My Little Pony limited Edition tactical backpack and mounted up on my new 53XY motorcycle. I lit a cigar and looked forward in the D4NK357 way I could. I kicked it into gear and did a 369 donut and left for the temple to meet with Gordon.
Gordon knew something was wrong. He called all the monks to the main chamber. It didn't take long for Gordon's suspicions be proven true. The storm was much closer, and in a massive flash of lightning, a figure came from the skies. Gordon couldn't see the entity's details, but he could tell it wasn't the soy-ridden fuck he's tangled with in the past. He ordered the monks behind him as the figure touched down. Finally, the figure stepped out from the bolts of lightning. The figure was massive, and thicc as fuk. He hawt muscles protruded from his t-shirt that was 2 sizes too small. His arms were covered in pressure bands, his long hair peeking out from his backwards hat. And perhaps the most terrifying of all...was his thick, flowing, beard. Gordon stepped back, but was determined to defend the temple and the freshly made sauce. The man took a step forward and spoke:
"hello….L.A. Beast here. Today, I am gonna rek your shit, and take your LambSauce." The beast then produced a bottle of Crystal Pepsi and chugged that shit like a baws.
"WHY DON'T YOU GO BACK UP YOUR GAY BOLT OF LIGHTNING AND FUCK OFF" Gordon yelled over the storm.
"...no" The beast remarked, and unleashed a massive flow of crystal pepsi vomit from his mouth. Gordon narrowly dodged the vomit, but the monks weren't so lucky. The poor fucks screamed as they melted into a puddle of nothing. Gordon was horrified, but didn't waiver. It was mono e mono, lol.
"Gordon, I like you, I think you're a pretty cool dude. But if you don't step out of the way and let me get the sauce, then I'm gonna have to move you myself."
Gordon was more than intimidated by this…..beast (lol) but he steeled his soul and resisted.
"Go fuck yourself" he screamed and summoned his most powerful spell.
"CUMMY CUMMY YUUUUUM" Gordon screamed as a massive blast of ethereal sauce launched straight at the LA Beast.
"Amateur" Beast remarked and caught the blast in his hand..his bare fucking hand. And launched it right back at Gordon. Gordon's eyes grew wide as he was engulfed by his own spell. He screamed as he was torn apart by the blast, and once the attack had ended….Gordon was nothing more than a pile of ashes. Not even his chefs shirt remained.
"Weakling" Beast remarked to the empty temple. But he wasn't alone. At the door of the temple stood a frozen raiden, brought down to his knees by the sight of his master being turned to nothing. He got back to his feet, pulled out a massive attack dildo from his tactical MLP backpack, and charged. Beast knew he was there the entire time, and dodged the brutal dildo attack, spun around, and got Raiden by the throat and picked the fuck off the ground by his throat. Raiden kicked his feet trying to find the ground, but the Beast's grasp was solid. He finally choked out a single phrase. "F-fuck you.." Raiden managed to say. Beats laughed in his face and drew back his pepsi powered fist. The LA beast had his own final phrase.
"Thanks for watching me assfuck your master. Have a good day…..in hell" and decapitated Raiden in a single punch. Watching in satisfaction as Raiden head flew out the temple in a bloody arch.
The LambSauce was his for the taking. The LA Beast made his way through the empty temple to the room hidden in the chambers below. Finally, he found the lockbox that held the sauce. Beast.
"I don't have time for this" Beast thought to himself and punched through the hardwood box as if it were cardboard. Finally, he held the sauce in his hand, he could feel the pulsating power of the sauce make its way through his body from his hand. Just then his phone rang. Beast begrudgingly answered
"THE FUCK DO YOU WANT I'M BUSY CLUTCHIN"
"...you do it?"
"Yes, Gordon is no more, and I even got his fuckbuddy."
"Good. He may not have been a threat, but he would go to the grave with Gordon. Sounds like he did just that. Since I told you where he was, I get half of the sauce."
LA Beast laughed "YOU GET AN EIGHTH, LIKE WHAT WE AGREED TO. DON'T FUCK WITH ME, KEEMSTAR."
Daniel sighed "fine, just get your ass back here so we can divide it out." The LA Beast hung up the phone, and flew back into the clouds in a flash of lightning.
