II. Do you care if I stay?
It was after 2 am but Wilhelmina still couldn't sleep. At first it had been Leah who refused to sleep, but at last, somehow, Amanda had managed to calm her; however, she just couldn't find rest.
After almost an hour spent turning over in bed, she decided it was useless to try anymore, so she got up and went in the kitchen. It took her more than ten minutes to find a damn magazine which hadn't ended up yet in the destructive hands of the little monster.
It was the latest Mode issue. Great, definitely new reading… Bored, she sat on the couch and started to lazily turn the pages, not really paying attention to what was written.
"You can't sleep either, huh?"
Wilhelmina wearily lifted her eyes.
"They refused to use any more fabric?" she said to Amanda as she saw her.
"What's wrong?" the girl answered innocently.
"You're wearing a non-existent underwear set." Wilhelmina noticed.
"And…?"
"Last night you had big woollen pyjamas on."
"Uhm yeah, you know, I'm still a bit hormonal." Amanda commented, heading in the kitchen "I need some tea, do you want me to prepare some for you too?"
Wilhelmina immediately closed the Mode issue and stood up. "Stop where you are. I don't want you to destroy my kitchen."
"Ok. I don't have idea how to make it anyway." Amanda simply answered.
Wilhelmina went closer to the kitchen counter. The truth was she had no idea how to make it either. Actually, she theoretically knew what to do, but at the moment she couldn't remember where the teapot was, or the tea itself.
"No tea?" Amanda asked after a while.
"Dear, are you sure you really want one?" Wilhelmina answered back
Amanda chuckled. "No, it doesn't matter. I told you, it's just I couldn't sleep."
Wilhelmina returned to the couch, Amanda sat there too; careful to stay far from the other person.
"It's Daniel. That's why you can't sleep, isn't it?" Wilhelmina spoke after a while.
"Yeah. Do you think he's going to stay?"
"I don't know. But we have to tell him how things are."
"We do?" Amanda slid on the edge of the couch. "I mean, maybe he doesn't want to stay. Maybe in a few weeks he'll be back in Europe, and we won't be forced to involve him in this situation."
"Claire will probably tell him everything soon. It's better for us precede her."
"Why? He's stayed away for such a long time, and he hasn't cared about what was happening here at all."
"I don't exactly remember you struggling to contact him."
"Really? Well, whatever..." Amanda stood up "...tomorrow I'm speaking with him."
"You?" Wilhelmina exclaimed, sceptical.
"What's wrong? If someone has to tell him about the incident, I think I should be that someone."
"This is out of the question." Wilhelmina stated.
"Why?"
"You still call it 'the incident'. This speaks volumes…"
"I call what happened by its name." Amanda answered dryly, her tone higher than expected.
"No, you don't. Please," Wilhelmina sighed heavily. "Tell me we are not about to discuss this again."
"We are not. I'm right, you know it." Amanda didn't realize she had shouted her last words.
"You're not, and now you're shouting."
The more Amanda got angry, the more Wilhelmina stayed quiet. The first was now going round the room, breathing hard, fighting back the tears; the latter remained on the couch, sitting lazily, not a trace of affliction in her eyes.
"Amanda," Wilhelmina reprised "We talked about this a million times. You only damage yourself, and you daughter, if you persist in not facing the truth."
The girl turned to the other woman, trying to look her exactly in the eyes. She rarely dared this, but she couldn't avoid it that night.
"The truth?" she yelled "Only I know what the truth is!"
"You don't know anything." Wilhelmina was starting to lose her temper. "You hide behind an illusion that you think makes you feel better; but it doesn't. More than six months have passed, how is it possible you still don't want to face the facts?"
Amanda didn't know how to answer. They had passed through similar arguments so many times and she just hadn't the strength to try finding new reasons.
However, this time Leah would save her from the impasse. She had been woken by the shouts, and she was now weeping. Without adding anything else, Amanda went toward her room.
"I hope it's clear" Wilhelmina said instead "that tomorrow I'm speaking with Daniel, and I'm explaining the situation to him."
Amanda, now at the beginning of the corridor, simply replied in a little voice; "Yes, ma'am"
xXx
Daniel equally couldn't sleep that night. In his case however, it was mostly the fault of the jet leg than anything else. He had wandered for a while through the corridors of the Meade Manor, just enjoying being there again. Eventually he had ended up in the kitchen, and once there he had opened the fridge, searching for something useful for a night time snack.
The fridge was empty, except of a couple of water bottles and a really aged carrot. Yeah, a single one. Daniel giggled at the sight.
"Are you hungry?" Daniel pulled out his head from inside the fridge and found himself facing his mother.
"Yeah, a bit. But your fridge isn't helpful." Daniel answered.
"Well, maybe that carrot…" Claire joked.
"Thank you, I have to decline you generous offer."
Claire laughed. "Well, you lose!"
"You're right I guess." He smiled. "Onto other scenarios..." Daniel tried to assume the most professional look he could "I'm seriously considering your idea of Hudson…"
"Seriously?" Claire asked, sincerely surprised. The truth was that earlier that day, when she had proposed the idea, she only did because had panicked under his pressing questions.
"Yeah. I'm not saying I'm accepting," He added immediately, seeing the hope which lit up his mother's eyes, "I'm just saying I'm thinking about it."
"I'm really happy about this." Claire answered softly.
"You know, once I even discussed the possibility with Alexis – the idea of me headingHudson. We considered that if I ever came back here, I certainly couldn't return to Mode. Wilhelmina would kill me."
"I can totally picture that."
"Anyway, speaking of brothers, has Tyler changed his phone number? I tried to call him, but there's no answer."
"Why are you so impatient to talk with him?"
"Well, he's my brother after all. I know we didn't start out the best, but we left in sort of good terms… I only want to try building something."
Claire felt lost, and sad. When Daniel knew the situation, all these good intentions would be useless. She had often dreamt of her sons finally appeased. She had dreamt of them in good terms as all brothers should be, she had dreamt of them working for the family's good. Unfortunately, now, none of this would ever be.
"He's out of town."
She couldn't tell him everything, of course, she knew better. But she needed to satisfy his curiosity a little…so that he decided to stay.
"He's visiting his adoptive parents?" Daniel asked, curious.
"No. He must be somewhere in the lower bay, or around there. He's with Connor, they've gone fishing."
Daniel couldn't help but raise his eyebrows "Fishing. With Connor. Mum, have you listened to yourself speaking?"
"I know it sounds a little odd. Ok, it sounds very odd. They met, they liked each other, and they share a love of fishing, so Connor invited Tyler to join him for a week around the bay."
Daniel was more and more confused. "That's a pair I sincerely never thought of."
"Nor me, or anyone else. I think Connor likes to act fatherly toward him somehow…"
"Well, even a thief is better than that son of bitch of his real father…"
"Daniel, don't call him a thief… He returned all the money, don't forget." Claire tried to say.
"Yeah yeah, sure. By the way, I hope whatever work he has now, he stays as far as possible from our money. He stole from us once, it's better we don't repeat…"
Claire forced a smile, "Don't worry, he has no access to the accounts. He only gives a hand with business management, money matters are exclusively down to Wilhelmina."
"Ok, ok, I get. Well, when will they be back then?"
"Uhm, you should ask Wilhelmina. She knows for sure."
"And you don't?"
"You know Daniel, I'm getting old. I don't remember all the details…"
"Details… sure. Maybe it's time for me to go back to bed."
"Yeah, I should too. Goodnight honey."
"Goodnight…"
Claire left quickly, Daniel stayed a little longer in the kitchen, pondering. Something still didn't fit in the picture, but he wasn't able to see what exactly.
xXx
Amanda had reached her room feeling the anger more and more with every step. She felt her blood pulsating in her veins, her eyes blurring because of the tears that she couldn't hold anymore. And worse than everything, she heard her daughter's weep echoing all around her. That sound hurt her so badly… it was so desperate, so demanding.
Entering the room, the weeping reached her much louder, but she just couldn't approach the cradle. She closed the door, and then leant against it, simply unable to move anymore.
"Please babe, sleep… please." she muttered after a while.
But Leah didn't stop crying, screaming or demanding. And still she couldn't approach because there was so much anger in her now, and everyone knows babies feel everything.
The salty taste of her tears invaded her mouth now. She so hated that taste, but she had learnt to live with it. She had learnt so many things in these last months, but still she hadn't learnt how not to get angry when Wilhelmina acted that way. Of course, she was grateful to her, how could she not be? She had to. After all, Wilhelmina had helped her in the most difficult moments of her life.
Her savior, however, had the bad habit of always wanting to be right. Always; particularly on that specific topic. This was what had disturbed their cohabitation the most. Not the absolutely different life habits, not even the presence of an often crying baby - only the differing opinions about the incident.
It hurt her most that Wilhelmina seemed to have completely lost what little faith she had shown at the beginning. What did she ask of her now? To give in? No way. She would keep on waiting, all the time needed. Keeping on waiting made her feel stronger. She knew she didn't have an inch of Wilhelmina's strength, but she knew also she should at least try.
Trying now, she started fighting against the tears that kept on falling. Still breathing hard, she finally walked to the cradle, and reached Leah. "I'm sorry I woke you honey," she said, brushing the baby's stomach "I'm really sorry. But now you have to calm down, and sleep again... Please." she added, almost imploring her.
Not seeing results, she picked her up and cradled her, trying to remember a lullaby or something of that kind. Luckily, such close contact with her mother alone seemed to have a really good effect in calming her. After a few minutes Leah stopped crying, and Amanda sighed in relief.
"Good girl." she said, her voice finally softened.
She let Leah rest her head against her shoulder and held her tightly. Slowly she went to sit on the edge of the bed, always caressing the little girl. She had to keep strong for her.
"Hey, I have an idea. What if you sleep with your Mommy tonight?" she whispered. Leah smiled, and Amanda took it as a sign of approval. She lay on her back, with her baby resting on her breast, still held tightly.
"But this is an exception. I don't want you to wanna sleep in mummy's bed until you'll graduate…"
xXx
The next morning, when Amanda went in the kitchen for breakfast, she found Wilhelmina sat at the kitchen table, slowly drinking coffee. At the sight of Amanda, Wilhelmina barely raised her eyes from the newspaper she was reading, and murmured a lazy "Good Morning."
Amanda didn't dare say anything. She put Leah in her playpen, and poured some coffee in a cup, still not talking.
"I asked Lily to buy a high chair. She's going to bring it here this afternoon." Wilhelmina finally spoke.
"There's no need." Amanda replied.
Wilhelmina stopped reading and looked at her: it was clear she had spent a long time crying.
"Of course there is, at least until you stop eating your daughter's baby food." Wilhelmina said.
Amanda took a deep breath. "It's not that. It's just… in a week Marc will have returned from Paris, and I'll be living in our apartment with him."
"Oh… yeah, you're right. Well, just keep and take it when you move. It's bought, it's yours."
The truth was Wilhelmina hadn't considered Marc would be back so soon, by now she was used to not having him around. It was good, she'd never confessed it, but she really missed him.
"By the way, I'm sorry for last night." Amanda added after a couple of minute of silence.
"For what?" Wilhelmina asked, her eyes again on the newspaper.
"I overreacted. After all, you may be right."
Wilhelmina returned to look at her, highly surprised. She never expected to hear words of that kind from Amanda. "I may be right? What do you mean?"
"I mean… I mean that probably it really is time for me to try to see things as they … you know, as they are."
Amanda had said these last words with hesitation, looking around, torturing her hands.
"I'm glad you're finally seeing reason."
"Yeah, me too…" Amanda answered back, trying to sound as convincing as she could.
Right then someone knocked on the door. "It's me" they heard Lily saying.
Amanda went to open to her. "Hi Lily."
"Good morning." Lily said with her usual sweet voice "Hey, what's wrong with your eyes?" she asked Amanda as she came inside.
Amanda bit her bottom lip "Nothing. I don't know, maybe is some sort of allergy, or just the lack of sleep of a new mom." She lied.
"Oh, I see." Lily lied back. She knew enough of the situation to not believe her.
"Wilhelmina," she said then to her boss "I have the hair-chair in my car. You want me to bring it up here now or later on today?"
"There's no need for it. At least, not here. Amanda's going to move out."
Now was Lily's turn to be surprised "You're moving out?" she exclaimed.
"As soon as Marc is back." Wilhelmina answered instead of Amanda. "We knew it, didn't we?"
xXx
Daniel and Claire had arrived rather early at Mode that morning. It was mostly Daniel's fault, who seemed to be impatient, needing to do something.
"When do you think Wilhelmina will be here?" he asked after a while they were there.
"I don't know," his mother answered "...but I guess it's a matter of minutes. Why do you need her?"
Daniel didn't have the opportunity to say anything, because in that very moment the elevator, not so far from where he and Claire were, opened; and Wilhelmina, Lily and Amanda stepped out, the latter carrying Leah.
"Good morning." He said to them cheerfully.
"Good morning Dan-" Amanda had started replying, but Claire interrupted her.
"Wilhelmina, Daniel was looking for you. I think he wants to tell you something."
Claire had definitely understood what Daniel had to tell Wilhelmina.
"What do you want?" Wilhelmina asked "I warn you, you gave me Mode and it will remain mine!"
"Oh no, it's not Mode," he reassured her "It's Hudson. Do you care if I take it?"
"What do you mean?" Wilhelmina asked puzzled.
"I'd like to assume the direction of it. I'm staying."
