If there was something worse than to feel devastated, then it probably was what Annie felt right now.

Sitting on the edge of the bed, she had her face trapped between her hands in an attempt to dry her tears. She had tried so hard to retain herself. She knew she didn't have any right to be the one who's crying but she couldn't help it; her eyes were just expressing the sorrow that had invaded her soul until then. And the shame. The stupidness. The pain.

She was blaming herself so badly, and seriously, she had reasons to. One of her hands were tapping against her forehead as she insulted her own person with cruel words, adding more weight to her suffering and humiliation, making her cry harder.

She would have prefered Mikasa to yell at her. To slap her, even, if it could have improve the situation between them. Because Mikasa's lack of words was worse than anything Annie could bear right now.

But when she suddenly heard her voice from the room next door, she instantly stopped from crying as she removed her hands from her face.

Mikasa was speaking, apparently on the phone, and Annie heard the voice getting closer to her. Her heart was racing, and her whole body began to express apprehension.

In her head, it was like 'Oh my god, Mikasa is coming. She's fucking coming !'

She felt her heart jumping inside her chest and she passed a hand on her eyes to dry them quickly, only to appear more fit to be seen. But her eyes were still wet and red. She couldn't mislead anyone with that.

The door opened and she swallowed hard when she saw Mikasa's shape to pass the gap. She had her head tilted, her phone between her ear and shoulder. She was nodding and humming at her interlocutor, her eyes staring at Annie from time to time with a dark expression, reinforcing the blond's unease.

Annie lowered her eyes until she found herself looking at her own feet and clenched her jaw. Mikasa's expression was really hard to look at. It was hard for her to feel that hatred inside the eyes of her lover.

She heard the girl hang up and she instantly forgot how to breath when Mikasa's voice spoke to her with an obvious detachment.

"I called a Uber. He said he could be here around ten or fifteen minutes so... get yourself ready."

And so, tears were coming back again.

Annie didn't want to leave. She didn't want Mikasa to let her go so easily. She knew she screwed up, but still, she couldn't believe how easy it seemed to be to split everything up like nothing had happened. She didn't want to accept that. She didn't want to lose more than a year of sharing because of a mistake like that. She could fix things. She would try. She loved her, and she knew Mikasa did as well.

"I... don't have any change on me," Annie said in a breath, knowing perfectly that Uber only accepted cash. "You know I only use debit-"

"I know," the girl cut harshly with a bit of annoyance in her tone of voice. "That's why I'm going to pay the travel expenses."

Annie shook her head in disagreement. "I could have walk."

Mikasa crossed her arms on her chest, leaning herself against the corner of the door in a sigh. "It's late. And cold," she added, still feeling a little concerned about Annie, of course, but it didn't make her softer for all that. "But just do what you want. You're old enough to look after yourself, anyway."

And with that, she just left the room.

Annie blinked a few times, her tears falling from her burning eyes in silence. She started to feel tired, physically and mentally and she straightened up. She grasped a gym bag she had filled with some of her belongings and decided to walk towards the living room. She took a last look at the bedroom she shared with Mikasa since months and closed the door behind her as she had a lump in her throat.

Mikasa was sitting on the couch, her arms hugging her knees and the head rested on them. She had red eyes too, but Annie never saw or never heard her cry from all the evening. It was hurtful in a way, even if she knew that Mikasa stayed away only to avoid conflicts and to hide her grief.

She knew that despite her coldness, Mikasa was completely damaged under the surface.

Annie felt like shit. She wanted to slap herself for her stupidness but, mostly, she wanted to touch Mikasa. To comfort her. She wanted to wrap her arms around her. To feel the warmth of her embrace and the softness of her lips.

She wanted to scream how much she was sorry. How much she loved her. But she just closed her eyes because she couldn't do anything; she knew Mikasa would reject her anyways.

She cleared her throat. "Well... I'm going," she said in a hushed voice as she re-opened her eyes.

"Okay," was all Mikasa answered. It was almost a breath, a word without any emotion.

Annie took one of her jacket which was hanging on the wall of the entrance, and pulled it on her. She struggled against those tears that threatened to flow again. "I can't take all of my things so I'll be forced to come back later. Is this a problem for you ?" she asked, hoping deeply that it was not.

"It's not," Mikasa replied in a soft voice. She softest she used since a long time. "You can come back later if you want. Just send me a text before," she informed without moving an inch from where she was standing.

Annie nodded, but it was more for herself than for Mikasa, since the girl didn't have turned her head to take a look at her girlfriend. Well, ex-girlfriend now.

She opened the frontdoor and was about to leave when Mikasa spoke from behind, her voice very close to her.

"The keys," Mikasa said with an indelicacy that made Annie turned towards her. "You don't have to keep them with you, since you won't live here anymore."

The blond's lips curved into a bitter smile and she tried very badly to fight her tears again. "But, I still have my thi-"

"That's why I asked you to send me a text before."

Annie shook her head. She was sad, but she had to admit that she started to feel a little irritated too. She knew she deserved hatred and punishment, but Mikasa was playing it roughly. "I see," she just spat, rummaging through her pocket to grab the keys. "Is there any other things you want to strip me off ?"

Mikasa furrowed her brows and then lowered her eyes. It seemed like she had finally understood how rude she was but, as expected, there was no apologize. She just held some money out to Annie. "Just keep the change," she simply said casually before she turned her heels, leaving Annie there, standing in front of the door like a fool.

Annie chewed on her lower lip. So, was it how things ended ? She cried again.


A.N: Thanks for reading. And... to be continued.