Day One

Rosalie was now almost sure that she and Emmett could get through the week without having sex. The bet was as good as won. They'd spent two hours in the garage working on the car. Now, they just had to paint it. Emmett started painting on the right side, Rosalie started painting on the left. She frowned when she realized Emmett was painting the car azure blue.

"Emmett, I thought we agreed to paint the car indigo blue."
"This is indigo blue."
"No, it's azure blue." She held up her paint brush. "This is indigo blue."
"Looks the same to me."
"Are you blind? They're completely different shades!"
"Fine." He put down the brush and can and went to get a new paint can, mumbling as he went.

"What did you just say?!" Rosalie demanded.

"Nothing dear."

"You just called me crazy!"
"No, I didn't!"
"Don't lie to me, Emmett! I heard you call me crazy!"

"Well, you are a little crazy."

"I am not!" She threw the paintbrush at him. He just barely dodged it. It left a paint smudge across his cheek. She noticed his jeans got tighter.

"Let's take a time-out." He choked out.
"A time-out? You deserve a good spanking, Emmett Cullen." She said this without thinking of the sexual aspect of what she was saying.

He winced and moaned. "God, Rosalie, you don't know what you do to me when you get all mad like this."
"If it wasn't for our stupid brother I'd be jumping your bones right now…Emmett, do you realize every single one of our arguments have ended the same way?"

"I like the way our arguments end."
"But we never talk through our issues. It's always just, you know, yelling, me smacking you and then us jumping in bed!"
"Would you rather me smack you?"
"Only on my ass-no, damn it. No! See, we're getting off track. Why don't we ever talk through anything?"
"Excuse me, I'm going to go kick Jasper's ass."
"Alright, but this conversation isn't over."
He left the room in a hurry, either to beat up Jasper or to "take matters into his own hands." Or both. She shook her head and decided she really needed to go shopping. She went off to find Alice.

When Jasper passed by Emmett and Rosalie's bedroom he knew he'd won the bet. He could hear the bed rocking back and forth. He grinned.

"Pay up, bro!" He yelled as he opened the door. Emmett shouted and threw a pillow at him. Jasper skillfully dodged it. He expected to hear Rosalie screaming at him. He did not. Emmett was lying on his back, but quickly rolled around and threw a sheet over himself.

"That is not how you masturbate!" Jasper shouted.

"You have a better way?" Growled Emmett, a weird, ferocious look in his eyes. Jasper slowly backed out of the room.

Rosalie was faring no better. She and Alice had gone shopping. Before the shopping spree she'd had one-hundred and forty-seven pieces of lingerie. After the shopping spree she had two-hundred and forty-seven pieces of lingerie. The poor cashier looked like he was about to have a nervous breakdown.

"Why didn't you stop me, you stupid pixie?!" She hissed at her sister. Alice, who had bought thirty-two new jeans shrugged.

"I was too busy picking up all these cute jeans."

"Carlisle is going to kill me! Or worse, take away my credit card!"
"Oh, don't worry. I've done the same thing. He can't stay mad for too long. Just give him the puppy-dog eyes."
"I don't do puppy-dog eyes."
Alice picked up a particularly racy bra. "Twenty-five bucks for this? There's barely enough fabric to cover your rosebuds!"
"Rosebuds? Jesus, Alice, it's not 1923."
"You would know." Alice whispered. Rosalie rolled her eyes.

"Emmett likes these kinds of bras. We had a fight and…and make-up sex with him is incredible. For next week I mean."
"Make-up sex is the best." Alice agreed. "Rosalie, how come you and Emmett are always going at it?"

"We aren't always going at it. What about you and Jasper?"

"True, but you do it more than us."
"I don't know, Alice, I really don't." Rosalie said, sounding deeply unsettled. "I mean, does he love me for me or because of my body? I hope it's not all physical."
"You know, maybe this week will be good for you two."
"I hope so."

"Emmett, are you a sex maniac?" Jasper asked his brother as he sat down beside him on the couch.
"No." He then punched Jasper in the shoulder.

"Ow!" Jasper yelled, then lunged at Emmett. Soon, they were rolling around on the ground, each one trying to pin the other. Emmett finally pinned Jasper with an arm lock.

"Rosalie wants to talk about our relationship! I don't like talking about things like that! Sometimes the words my mouth make upsets people!"
"I noticed, now get off of me!" Jasper demanded. Emmett did.

"What exactly does Rosalie want to talk about?"
"Well, we had a fight and I called her crazy, because she was acting crazy and now-thanks to your stupid bet-she wants us to talk it through."

"Why don't you just talk it through? Me and Alice do all the time."
"You and Alice never fight."
Jasper snorted. "Not when you're looking, we don't."

"But Alice is…I don't know, nice. Rosalie's nice too, I love her y'know, but…don't take this the wrong way, but I'd rather deal with an angry Alice than an angry Rosalie."

"That's because you've never dealt with an angry Alice. Listen, just look her in the eyes, take her hands and say sorry. She'll melt."
"And we'll wind up in bed."

"So? Just admit it. You can't go a week without sex with Rosalie."

Emmett sighed. Jasper very well may have been right. At that moment Rosalie walked in with Alice. They had around ten shopping bags. It took about ten minutes before they could get all the new clothes in, then another ten to get it up to their bedrooms.

"Our wives are going to bankrupt us all." Jasper said.
"Yep. I'm going to go talk to Rose."
"Good luck, man." Jasper told him, before sending an overwhelming feeling of horniness towards his brother.

Emmett glared at him. "Don't cheat man!"

Jasper laughed. Emmett walked up the stairs to go make up with his wife. She was happily putting up her new wardrobe. Emmett raised an eyebrow at the raunchy clothes.

"Wow…those panties are…wow."

"They come with a no shrink guarantee!" Rosalie replied.

"If it shrunk it'd disappear." He commented.

She pouted. "You don't like it?"

He walked up, took her hand in his and stared deeply into her golden eyes. "I love it. I love everything about you."
"Oh…oh Emmett!"
She wrapped her arms around him and fiercely kissed him. He ran his fingers through her silky hair, laying kisses down her neck. She moaned and held him tight. Suddenly he broke away.

"'I'm going to go take a cold shower right now!" He blurted out.
"Yeah me too!" She said.
They both ran off to separate bathrooms.

Emmett groaned as he let the cold water run down his genitals.

"Fuck you, Jasper!" He cursed. "How am I going to get through this week?"