Lost and found
I heard voices. – "you know things are not the same without you around, I miss you so much. Things are not going so well… Wells already has enemies and you know this people aren't like us… I miss the Ark, and my parents and everything, I can't do this without you." – then silence followed by crying. I tried to move, open my eyes, even make a sound, I tried the hardest I could but it wasn't working at all. I couldn't stand to hear this voice anymore, even the smell was so, so familiar, how was it possible I couldn't identify it. But everything became so clear all of a sudden, it was Clarke. With this realization my body involuntarily moved and my hand touched hers. – "Thalia?" – She grabbed my hand, I was able to feel it, even over the excruciating pain on the side of my torso. Once again I tried my hardest to open my eyes, but this time at least they showed movement because Clarke seemed to notice it a bit more than before and insisted in talking, keeping me awake and with my brain racing through everything she said.
What did she mean with "enemies" and how could Wells, such a sweet boy, the chancellors son and one of my long time best friends have made enemies in a couple of hours? Wait, hours? How long have I been sleeping? And was my wound so bad that Clarke would have thought me dead? I mean, Clarke used to work at the med station back at the Ark and she was damn good at it! She saved lives, everyone's but Wells' mom, in theory she had a degenerative disease or whatever Clarke said. I remember Wells being so thrown down, the only thing that brought him back on his feet was reading "the falling of the roman empire" to her, it was pretty tough. On another hand it brought him and Clarke a lot closer, she even stole books from the library to give him when his mother was held in the clinic not able to move. Music was a great deal to him too, every year on the day the relics of the instruments were set free from their cages to enable musicians to play the all-time classics he was there and brought Clarke with him at least in the last year, significant things happened on the shade of his grief. But isn't everything just like that?
On my third day of conscience I was finally able to open my eyes and see Clarke smiling in pure joy and shredding a tear of possible fear, she even hugged me almost ripping apart the stitches she so carefully did on my wound.
"Here" – she put her favourite jacket behind my head – "it will make you more comfortable".
As I was about to answer she said not to make such an effort because it was not worth it, then she hugged me again with a lot less strength and left saying that I should try and rest. Let me just say that Earth could be all cool and stuff but for me it was sucking so bad! I mean, I was supposed to just lay still and rest. By the way I wasn't even doing good on that simple shore 'cause everyone around me seemed worse than me and the smell of blood was killing me slowly.
"Hey!" – a girl with vivid blue eyes smiled at me.
I tried to answer even if Clarke told me not to. Seeing my struggle the girl asked me if the cat had got my tongue, what made me laugh and hurt like hell.
"Don't be shy, I'm Octavia." – the girl proceeded to say being then interrupted by a guy.
"Come on Octavia, don't bother the girl." – he wasn't pleased at all and analysing by the bow he carried on his back and his blood covered clothes he must had been hunting, they seem so organised and evolved, I must have been out for weeks.
"Oh, don't mind him, he's just my brother, Bellamy. Be sure to be here when I come back." – Yeah, as if I'd be going somewhere in the next hours. Wait, what did she say about brother? Nobody in the Ark has a brother, I mean, the only child policy was taken to an extreme there, any couple who had more than a baby would get both of them killed as well as the baby so… how would that girl be around still? And why was the so called brother wearing a guard uniform? So many questions and so much time to think about them. I'll be going crazy soon, especially if I don't speak with somebody soon enough.
Day 4:
Clarke came around again, she said I was getting better but seemed afraid of something.
"What's the matter Clarke?" – I finally asked hearing my weak voice.
"Thalia! It's so nice to finally hear you sweet voice again, I was so scared." – she started crying, this was getting way too frequent lately, and knowing Clarke as I do something is clearly wrong, she didn't cry at all back in the Ark. Only when her dad got floated, I was already in the cell and I'm glad for it, she was arrested that same day and it was when we got to know each other better, until then we were kind of strangers with Wells as a common friend, but the fact of being in enclosure with someone for that long got us to talk about everything one could imagine. I can surely say that she is my best friend and the only person who truly knows me either here or the Ark. We truly relied one on the other and I guess we still do, so… why was Clarke crying right there in front of me?
"Tell me Clarke. What's happening?"
"I don't know, things are just so wrong here, there's no peace, people are dying from viruses and infections, even poisoned because our knowledge about the plants on the ground is so small. I don't know what to do anymore. They even started acting like savages and someone suggested we should take our bracelets off so the Ark doesn't receive our vital signs, it even became a blackmailing strategy from the guy who hunts. It's awful."
"Things will get better Clarke, you'll talk them out of it in no time. You always do." – I got my arm around her neck resting her head on my shoulder – "Now come on, clean those tears from your eyes! Damn, you look gorgeous even when you cry." – Every word was hard to say but my friend needed me and I was going to be there for her even if it costed me my life.
She asked kindly if she could take a look at the wound, probably to see how it was healing and to clean it. She removed the covers and gently pulled my shirt up exposing my skin to the cold making me shiver, her touch was also cold making me flinch but she didn't seem to notice it. Pure horror in her eyes when she looked at me.
"How bad can it be?"
"shhhh…" – she told me to be quiet and demanded silence so she could think. I watched her go crazy and dazedly through what seemed like a med kit or at least our medical supplies not finding what she was looking for. But she kept searching again, and again. She then pulled a syringe out of the case and a white flask. Meanwhile I got myself on my elbows so I could see what was so bad. I imagine horror crossing my face too since what I saw was as disturbing as worrying. The wound in my torso was developing some kind of white stuff around the stiches, pus or something like that, but that could explain why the wound wasn't healing and why the pain didn't stop, I must have got some kind of infection due to lack of proper care.
"Clarke… it's not your fault"
"shhh" – again. She was blaming herself and trying to figure an antibiotic out of all the flasks. I laid back trying to think of something nice to say, but I saw my ending so near I couldn't think of anything. Several minutes later Clarke got to me again with a full syringe. – "This will make you better." – she smiled asking for my arm.
"You know you probably shouldn't waste supplies on me right? This is nothing, look I can stand already." – lies after lies to make her feel better, I couldn't even bend but tried to stand anyways failing miserably as it was expected.
"Stand still, don't be stupid please. I'm not giving up on you, not you of all these people." - This time I was the one crying. I couldn't help it, Clarke was there being all sciency for me, and wasting precious medicine on a girl who was already dead just because she was stubborn. She stuck the needle down my vein and injected that cold liquid stuff on my bloodstream. Then she sat on the edge of the improvised bed and got her arm across me in a gesture that reminded a hug, she leaned towards me and cleaned the tears on my face. Her blue eyes stared into my soul while I cried like a baby trying my hardest to stay strong when I clearly knew I was dying soon. I eventually fell asleep from exhaustion or the effect of the meds. Clarke laid next to me hugging me from behind and making me feel safe for the first time since we'd got into that doomed ship.
Day 5:
I woke up startled in the middle of the night by Clarke moving in her sleep. I admired her for a few minutes but I could have done it for hours. Her breathing became regular after a while and I fell asleep again listening to the musicality of Earth itself in the night, only an animal could be producing such melodic sounds, maybe it wasn't so bad after all, at least Clarke will be in this amazing place.
The soft light of the dawn bathed my face and woke me warmly. I watched little particles glowing in that yellowish light being carried in the air, floating so calmly. Clarke was still sleeping. She must had been so exhausted of everything, the sick people, the hunts, dealing with all the douches and everything that was going on outside in the real world outside that medical tent.
"NO!" – Clarke said making me jump on the bed and waking her up.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you up, were you having a nightmare?"
"Don't worry about that, how are you doing?" – she stood up and put her hand on my front. "Well, at least you don't have a fever anymore." – she smiled.
"Not to rush you, but shouldn't you be going?" – the guy from before said.
Clarke exited the tent running. The tent couldn't be enough to carry every wounded or sick person in the camp, he was right, she should be going.
"Another dead." – an asian dude announced sadly. The guy on the bed next to mine apparently died last night. He was pretty sick and succumbed to the spreading of a poison from something he'd eat. He vomited all day and night, that being combined with the horrible cough he had in the last nights and the irregular breathing. Absolutely brutal.
"We are gathered here to mourn another one of our own…" – I could hear Wells giving a speech nearby, he spoke about how awful it was to see people dying specially in situations like these and with people this young and full of life after all the sacrifices they'd done and everything. Apparently he was the 10th in a couple of days since we landed. – "may we meet again."
"May we meet again" – a mourning choir answered.
Wells came to make a visit. He said I was looking good after all Clarke said.
"You've even still got that spark on your eyes, Clarke is such an exaggerated girl."
"I'm doing fine, thanks Wells, it's so good to finally see you." – I hugged him feeling his sadness perspiring through his touch. – "I'm sorry for the dude. And the others too, don't be like this please."
"I'm just… sad. I guess. And the fact that the Ark isn't reaching us with any information on anything is just killing me." – we continued talking about his father that got shot in the Ark and the fact that he would have to deal with the guy who shot him for the rest of his miserable life. The night soon arrived. Wells got out of the tent to do some manly work as he calls it, looks like their building warehouses to store food. Soon everything will be fine.
Clarke came around, payed her attention to the other kids and gave me another dose of the antibiotics. She checked the wound again, better than the day before and told me about her day, she fell asleep in the middle of a sentence, sitting with her head on the bed.
"I wish I could go out there and help you Clarke." – I whispered softly while playing with her blonde curly hair, it was not as soft as it was on the Ark of course, but I missed this moments so badly.