Chapter Two
"You're in a good mood."
Merlin looked up from the soapy plate in his hand, using his shoulder to knock one earphone from his ear.
"What?"
Will sat his shopping bag down on the countertop and rolled his eyes before giving Merlin a familiar what-am-I-going-to-do-with-you smile.
"I said you're in a good mood."
"Oh." Merlin replied, turning back to dunk the plate once more into the basin in the sink and reaching for the scourer, "Yeah."
"Too right, yeah. Your singing's terrible, mate."
Without turning, Merlin lifted one hand from the soapy water and flicked it in his flatmate's direction. A satisfying squeal told him the water had hit home.
"Oi, you pillock! Watch it!"
Merlin laughed. Will left the room grumbling, slapping in effectively at the large damp patch on his shirt. By the time he came back downstairs in a dry t-shirt, Merlin was drying off his hands and the drain was gurgling as it hastened away the suds. Will raised an eyebrow at him and Merlin pushed Will's favourite mug across the worktop till it sat next to his own in front of the growling kettle.
"Tea." WIll answered, reaching over to begin the process of emptying the shopping bag.
"You get sugar?" Merlin asked in return, reaching over to take the teabags Will had just produced.
Will made an affirmative noise, splitting the shopping items into categories based on where in the kitchen they were kept. Merlin filled their teabag jar and placed one in each mug. After a moment of watching the water dance through the window on the kettle, Will handed him a bag of sugar. Merlin promptly set about opening it.
"What did you get up to, then? Stack a lot of shelves?"
Merlin snorted at Will's teasing tone, swatting one hand in his friend's direction without really trying.
"Oh sorry," laughed Will, "I meant did you organise lots of shelves?"
"You're an arse." Merlin answered, filling the two mugs with hot water.
"You like my arse." Will retorted, and Merlin turned to flash him a slow, deliberately flirty grin.
As he'd known it would, it made Will shift his weight a little. He laughed with triumph when Will scowled, turning himself to face Merlin and keep his bum away from him. Merlin tipped his head to one side and stuck his tongue out at him.
"I've got no interest in your bony backside, thanks."
Will mimed relief, wiping his brow and giving Merlin a thank-goodness look. Merlin rolled his eyes and stirred the tea, a smile creeping over his face. Will moved to the fridge, chucking cheese into the bottom drawer in a deliberately haphazard manner meant to irk Merlin. Merlin groaned, half from annoyance and half because he knew that was the reaction Will was hoping for. They had routines, exchanges of looks and responses that went back to their years in nappies, and although they did sometimes truly drive each other crazy, there was never anything to come of it.
Merlin loved Will to death and back and Will felt the same, not that he'd ever tell Merlin because being the mushy one in their friendship was the job of the gay bloke.
Will came back with his peace offering, handing Merlin the milk before scooping up another bundle of shopping, this time for the freezer. Merlin finished their tea, chucking the spoon in the empty sink and putting the lid on the empty milk carton.
"Tea's ready."
"No shit, I could never have guessed." Will answered good-naturedly.
Merlin placed his tea in front of him before sliding onto one of their stools, flicking at Will's ear in the process. Will ducked away with a distracted grumble and walked the final dry goods to their designated cupboard. Merlin watched him, wincing when Will dumped everything in an empty space and left it, shutting the door. When he caught Merlin's eye again, he grinned.
"I give you two hours before you sort it out." he wagered, lifting his mug and grinning broadly at Merlin's denial.
"Anyway," he started, taking a drink from his mug and levelling a proper gaze Merlin's way, "did a certain someone visit the Holy Grail of Books today?"
Merlin ignored the taunt about his beloved library, instead looking down into his mug and humming as though he didn't understand. Will leaned one side against the counter, angled to give Merlin his attention. Merlin could see no way to avoid the coming thread of conversation.
"Oh, lots of people in today. Looks like the exam madness is starting to kick in." He risked an innocent glance at his roommate as he drank his tea. "Aren't you about ready to start studying, yet?"
Will opened his mouth and then stopped, shaking his head.
"No, no. Don't change the subject. Did he come in, or didn't he?"
Merlin made a defeated sound and blew his fringe out of his eyes dramatically, to make Will laugh as much as to give himself time to prepare himself for the coming conversation.
"He so did." Will answered, a laugh in his voice, "You're going red."
"I am not." Merlin replied, before feeling his face heat.
"Aha! You are!" Will crowed gleefully, his eyes gleaming the way they did when he was about to launch into a full taunt mode.
"That's only because you said I was." Merlin replied, scowling at him and flicking some crumbs from the worktop in his direction.
Will simply stepped to one side and chuckled, before leaning on the counter again.
"You've got it bad, mate." He smiled, one elbow propped to balance his chin on his knuckles.
Merlin thought about denying it, before realising he didn't have the energy for a battle. His shoulders slumped and he sighed.
"Yup."
Will snorted, draining his mug and pushing off from the worktop to take it over to the sink. He ruffled Merlin's hair as he passed.
"Tell him already. Watching you pine is sickening."
Merlin groaned and buried his head in his arms, his forehead flat on the countertop.
"Do we have to do this again?"
Will sighed, over-dramatic and pretending he was doing Merlin some great service.
"No. But I will say this: If you don't get your arse in gear by Christmas I'm going to tell him myself."
"Will-"
"No, I mean it this time," Will's voice was firm but not unpleasant, and by the sounds of it he had come to stand beside Merlin. "You've been after him forever and every year you get worse. Tell him, or I will because by Gods I'm tired of you moping. Especially at Christmas."
"I don't mope!" Merlin exclaimed, his head coming up so that he could shoot Will an indignant gaze, "I'll have you know I'm the most cheerful person you know."
"Besides Gwen and Freya." Will retorted.
"Besides Gwen and Freya." Merlin conceded with a grin. "But other than that it's me, yeah?"
Will rolled his eyes.
"Yeah, but that's only because even you're a mopey git you're still a chipper fucker."
Merlin beamed, and Will groaned and rolled his eyes again.
"Just talk to him already, so that he can shoot you down and we can get on with finding you some other bloke."
Merlin knocked Will with his elbow, but Will only sighed and threw an arm over his shoulders.
"Just… Try, Merlin. If he's a pillock, he's a pillock. And if he's not, you can go off and be adorable and sickening together and stay out of my way, yeah?"
Merlin hummed and shrugged him off and picked up his mug, wrapping his fingers around it. When Will ruffled his hair again Merlin shot him a half-smile.
"You care, really, is that what you're saying?"
Will stuck his nose in the air and snorted.
"Nope. I don't care either way if you never get him."
But his half-glance at Merlin said otherwise, and Merlin felt it glow warm in his chest.
"Okay." he said, because Will seemed to be waiting for something.
WIll nodded sharply, and then threw his arms out in a stretch.
"Welp, my work is done. I'm off out to the pub, you coming?"
Merlin shook his head.
"Nah, I'll stay in. I've got-"
"Reading to do, yeah. Don't wait up, Merls."
Merlin laughed, watching Will leave the room and head for his jacket, hanging in the hall.
"As if I would!" he called after him, and he heard Will laugh as he pulled the front door of their flat shut behind him.
With Will gone, Merlin finished his tea, cleaning up crumbs and coffee rings from the worktops and generally fussing because he wanted to avoid thinking about him until he was done and could curl on the couch under a blanket and just daydream.
Merlin knew he was ridiculous, but it didn't matter in the slightest. Three years of it had shaved away much of his self-embarrassment. Besides, it wasn't like it hurt anyone but himself, was it? Merlin sighed as he tucked the dishtowel over the oven door handle.
He hunted around for his Christmas DVDs in the living room, finding Love Actually and immediately putting it in the drawer of the console Will had been playing before he went shopping. Blanket in hand, Merlin made himself comfortable, not even trying to imagine himself and the mysterious blonde in the roles of almost every couple, sighing into the embrace of Christmas spirit and feeling his chest pang in a familiar manner.
What better to soothe a love-sick heart than a soppy Christmas movie and the imaginings that he'd be brave enough to approach the bloke he wanted more than he could voice?
And it wasn't just a physical thing, either. Not that he wasn't gorgeous, because oh Lord was he. But Merlin had watched for three years, had seen the way the blonde lit up when he spoke about something he must feel passionate about, had watched with envy every time the bloke got involved in whatever banter was taking place at his table. Merlin had seen the way he looked on Sundays, when he almost always came alone and read in a corner by himself, when he looked soft and his hair wasn't styled and he looked like he could just curl up and sleep there in the corner. It always made Merlin want to go over, to start a conversation, to sit maybe a little too close and be… Well, sappy and cuddly and… Well. Merlin had ached, every time, wishing he had the courage to go over and see what he was reading, talk about it if he knew it, recommend something he thought might be his thing.
And Merlin so badly wanted to know just what his thing might be. He wanted to know if he was into poetry, if he was musical, did he do sports? Merlin wanted to know if he had a secret passion for YA novels like Merlin did, or if he had something equally awkward. Did he love Christmas as much as Merlin did? Was that why he'd been in the library the past three Christmases, when it was time for Merlin to put up the tree? Would he be there this Friday, when the tree went up?
The idea popped into his head so hard it jerked him upright.
That was it! The way to start a conversation.
Merlin was filled with a sudden, movie-fuelled conviction. He'd be the one putting up the tree anyway, so if the blonde just happened to be there he could… Merlin could somehow find a way to ask him to help, or at least do something to catch his attention and start a conversation. Merlin grinned, feeling anticipation stir and bubble. Two days. He had two days to wait and if he happened to visit then Merlin was going to ask him.
Nerves be damned.