Memory of a Girl
Here they were at another unknown port, a small Earth Kingdom town, getting supplies, and as Uncle subtly put it "burning off some manly energy." As usual, Zuko stayed behind on the small steel ship. His crew would come back at sunrise, drunk and loud and bumping into things. They disgusted Zuko. He knew what else the men did in town. He was only fourteen but he had overheard their lewd conversations enough times and he had an idea what a man did with a woman, or with another man.
Sometimes, in the quiet of his room, his one place of respite, an urge would overcome him; he tried so very hard to suppress it. What was the point of giving in to animal needs? For the last year, Zuko had looked at his face in his bedroom's mirror, felt the scar with his pale fingertips, tracing its enormity, feeling the roughness of the destroyed tissue and eventually turning away, unwilling to see anymore. What girl would ever look at him with desire or affection or love? What girl would ever see beyond the mass of pink and red covering the left side of his face? He didn't need more rejection. His father had given him enough to last a lifetime.
Occasionally though, the image of one girl would slip through, unwelcome yet welcome at the same time. What would she think if she could see? Would she sense his shame and his dishonor? Would her narrow, astute gold eyes see through his skin and bone to the heart of him? Or would she laugh, scream in horror, turn away?
One very small part of Zuko thought that she might accept him, disfigurement and all. The girl with the silky midnight hair and skin paler than the moon liked him once. They had a secret bond, an alliance of souls; driven together in escaping Azula, staying together simply because they enjoyed it.
She smelled good, vanilla and jasmine and her hand was soft when he held it. Zuko recalled his last look at her. She was already tall, angular, with budding breasts that softened her appearance. Her mouth was a thin line over straight white teeth and her voice had deepened into something rough and sensual.
"Mai," he said aloud.
No one could hear. He could do what he wanted. Zuko moved his hand downward.