Knee

Gary, his eyes wide open in pure, unfiltered rage, like a pair of big white saucers with two Oreos in the middle, stood there behind the counter in his uniform, tight against his huge, rippling body, breathing deep, hot breaths. He was going to crack any minute. Suddenly the phone rang. "WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!" he screamed at the top of his voice as he picked it up to see who was at the other end. "Salutations, my child" replied a deep, milky smooth voice, calm as. "I would like to order a simple cheese pizza, accompanied by a large Dr Pepper. Please make haste, lest I DESTROY THE UNIVERSE!". This last part the mysterious stranger made sure to deliver with just the right amount of dramatic flair and menace. "Who is this?" Gary queried as he squinted with suspicion. "Why God of course!" replied the heavenly father. "Well, GOD! I feel I should let you know that I haven't slept in a week, and as such I AM IN NO MOOD TO TOLERATE THREATS, YOU DAMN SQUIB!". "And I feel I should let you know that I'm hungry, and the heavenly oven just short circuited. Deliver the pizza Gary, or else! 30 hours or less". And then he hung up. Suddenly Ross burst onto the scene from his office. He liked bursting in. He liked it a lot. "GARY, YOU'VE GOTTA MAKE THAT DELIVERY. THE FATE OF THE UNIVERSE LIES IN YOUR HANDS!". "Oh please, it was probably just Bob making prank calls again". "Gary make the delivery or you're fired!". "FUCKNUTS!". And with that, Gary set off on his perilous journey to satiate a divine hunger and secure the fate of all that he knew and held dear, but he wasn't the least bit happy about it, oh no.

As Gary reached the precipice of his beautiful village, he took a moment to look back longingly. "I'll be back soon, my Chester" he uttered softly as a single manly tear fell from his eye. Turning back to face the path ahead of him, his face filled with an expression of determined rage. As you can probably tell by now, a lot of the emotions that Gary (and Bob for that matter) express are often sprinkled with a hint of rage. "You want your cheese pizza, oh lord?! Well, you rang the right delivery boy". Gary ripped the uniform from his body to reveal his skin tight ninja suit that made every feature, especially his beautiful twenty four pack, nicely visible. Oh yeah and it showed off his package quite nicely also. His entire attire was complete with ninja stars, huge ass katana, and MOTHERFUCKING WOLVERINE CLAWS!. I repeat, MOTHERFUCKING WOLVERINE CLAWS!. Oh and also the pizza box, containing the sweet cheese pizza, as you would expect. Leaving his tattered delivery uniform behind, he took his first steps towards destiny, and as he did so, a glorious sound emerged from the heavens. Indeed it was the choir of destiny themselves. "Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah". And then the Electric guitars kicked in.

"WHEN THE NIGHT IS LONG, AND THE HUNGER'S STRONG,

YOU CAN COUNT ON HIM TO BE THERE IN A HURRY,

WHEN THE TIME IS RIGHT, AND YOUR STOMACH'S TIGHT,

HE'LL COME CRASHING THROUGH YOUR DOOR, WITH SOME CURRY,

NO, PIZZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!,

IT'S ACTUALLY PIZZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!,

MOTHERFUCKING PIZZAAAAAAAAAAAA!".

Beown, beown, beown, those guitars went as the song of destiny played on.

"HE IS THE ONE THEY CALL GARY,

NOT BARRY, OH NO, DEFINITELY GARY,

BUT HE'S ALSO KNOWN BY ANOTHER NAME,

AND THIS NAME IS".

Dramatic Pause.

"DELIVERY NINJA!"

With this last line, Gary bounded into the air with great force, leaving a crater in the ground as he did so. Still the guitars and the many other instruments of the choir of destiny sounded as Gary flew through the air, before landing into a sprint that would leave a host of mini craters where his feet had propelled him forward. The Universe would not come to an end, not while the blood still flowed through veins, all bulgy like. You may have noticed that I like describing Gary's physical form quite a lot. Well keep noticing motherfucker!