Instinctive
Flames raced towards Numina at an alarming speed. A protective barrier shimmered translucently before her, yet it was not strong enough for the force of the fire, which seemed to rake against the protective aura like claws before tearing into it. The flesh on Numina's arm sizzled under the torrential heat, causing in to cry out in both pain and alarm. The fire disappeared. Loki had stopped his attack, but Numina reacted instinctively to her pain.
The ground of the training arena crumbled and cracked underneath an immeasurable force as a shockwave passed overhead. Loki barely had time to dodge it before it crashed into the wall, spider web fractures erupting from site of the collision.
Lightning surged forward from him. In her rush, Numina had been careless. She was unable to react in time to protect herself from the lightning. Her heart leapt into her throat at the sight of the crackling electricity. It stopped inches from her face, hanging immobilized in the air. It then dissipated. An illusion, nothing more.
Numina let out a breath she had drawn in when she found herself caught off guard. Her arm throbbing at the unintended injury, and she hastily cast a spell to sooth it, but didn't heal it. Loki was approaching her. If she turned her attention from him, she may face real lightning in the form of sharp words.
"What did you do wrong?" He asked, voice calm and unemotional.
"My barrier wasn't strong enough."
Loki shook his head. "A small miscalculation that can easily be fixed. What did you do afterwards that was incorrect?"
She frowned slightly before figuring it out. "I lashed out…instinctively in anger."
He nodded. "It was rushed, careless, and wholly unnecessary. If I were your enemy, you would be dead."
Sometimes I can't tell if you are or are not my enemy, she thought to herself. "I understand."
"Heal yourself and regain your stance," Loki said, turning away from her. "Put more energy into your barrier."
Numina's hand glowed with sky colored light as she healed her burns. "Less energy. More control. More energy. Too much control… Make up your mind…" she groaned softy to herself.
"Use energy and control as necessary," Loki snapped. "It is not a difficult concept to grasp."
She flinched at the anger and irritation she felt in his words, but refused to give him any other reaction. Numina wanted to prove that she wasn't weak, and that she could learn. So far, she felt as though she were failing. Perhaps I was a fool for thinking I could do more with magic than with daggers.
Doubling the barrier's strength, she waited for Loki's attack. Green streaks of energy peeled towards her, crashing against the new barrier. Numina staggered as though she had been physically blocking the blow. Before she could regain concentration, another attack with the same force struck the barrier. The magic that Numina wielded shattered after the second contact, the barrier dissipating before her.
Loki held up his hand, green energy swirling in his palm. He was using his own magic in one of the rawest and most powerful forms it could take on. Numina could never hope to match his strength, and the God of Mischief was well aware of that. He wore a knowing smirk, taunting her. But Numina would not give up so easily. She erected a new barrier in front of her, a faint glow marking where it was. For her previous ones, the barrier had been concave, shaping itself around Numina. This new one was vertical and slightly convex in the area that was directly in front of Numina.
She did not have to wait long for Loki to attack again. More green energy streaked across the air, looking almost like the flames he had used earlier. They struck the barrier, and it held. The energy dispersing aross the barrier before disappearing. Loki attempted three more times to break Numina's aura, yet each spell did nothing to weaken it. If anything, the barrier seemed to be growing in strength. It was with his last attack that Loki realized what Numina had managed to engineer with her magic, though the realization almost came too late. As Loki's magic crashed against the barrier in a wave of flame, Numina released her control over it.
The energy that had been building with each of Loki's attacks was released, flowing in a swirling mass of magic. He did not bother to block the oncoming force, merely hijacking the energy in the similar fashion Numina had done with her barrier, pushing its trajectory so that it angled to his left, missing him completely. As it crashed into the wall behind him, Loki smiled with smug satisfaction.
"Nicely done," he said, walking towards her.
Numina looked at him with masked shock. She didn't know which was more surprising, the fact that he was smiling or the fact that he had just given her what she thought was a complement. "Thank you…" she said as he came to stand before her.
"It was not what I was hoping for," he continued, "but it did work for you." He held out his hand and flames danced across his fingertips. "Push it from my hand," he told her.
Numina looked at him curiously while reaching for the energy she expected to find bubbling in Loki's hand. It was easy enough to locate, and though the energy was wrapped into the form of fire, it felt shockingly cold to her touch. And faintly familiar. She pushed against it softly, and the flame leapt from his hand in the opposite direction. It had taken no effort on her part.
Loki nodded, dropping his hand. "Redirecting is much less difficult than blocking. Less taxing as well." Numina nodded her understanding. "I had been hoping that you would become frustrated with your faltering barriers and lash out constructively against my own energy either stopping it midair or overcoming the momentum and changing its course." He crossed his arms. "The absorption effect you integrated into you barrier was impressive, though."
"You said it yourself," Numina said lightheartedly, a small smirk on her lips, "I am stubborn."
The relaxed and thoughtful look on Loki's face dropped back into its commonly emotionless state and the playful light in his eyes faded back to darkness. "You heard the argument I had with Frigga," he said, not asked.
She regretted saying it instantly. "You were rather loud in your…displeasure, my lord."
He winced at the way she addressed him. He hated hearing his title over and over again. It became tiresome in its repetitiveness. He messaged the bridge of his nose in impatience. "Loki. Just call me Loki."
"I did not mean to eavesdrop, Loki," Numina continued. "I apologize for doing so."
He shook his head. She was always worrying over what she had done, fretting that a mistake would suddenly cause the end of the world. "Stop apologizing for everything," he growled. Numina opened her mouth to say something, most likely another apology before quickly shutting her lips, teeth nearly clattering together in an audible sound. "Better." With a wave of his hand, generic warrior outlines, grey and faceless appeared on the other side of the training area. "They are your enemy. Dispose of them in whichever way you feel most comfortable with."
Numina raised an eyebrow at him before turning her attention the illusions he conjured for target practice. She hesitated for a moment, wondering what she should do: if she should attack with something simple, showing creativity; use a complex spell, showing her capabilities; or if this was some other ridiculous trick meant to make things even more difficult.
"An enemy won't care how intricate your attack is. He is still your enemy and won't be impressed," the memory of her mother's lessons sang in her ears. It was advice shared for a different skill set altogether, but it qualified here as well. Loki's eyes seemed to boring into her as he waited for Numina to finally do something. She needed to reset herself, reset the situation. Numina relaxed and closed her eyes.
Fierce ice opened and took in the illusions that remained where they were. Five of them, gray and faceless. She threw her hand swiftly towards the illusions as if physically throwing something, directing the energy she had already called forth from deep inside, using her magic to shape it. An orb of blue electrical energy flew from her palm, racing through the air until it hovered behind Loki's apparitions, spinning with great force. With one last flicker of her will, the orb exploded with lightning surging out from it, destroying the illusions. She relaxed her stance and turned to Loki expectantly.
He shrugged. "It took you long enough."
Numina nodded, agreeing with him. "I was too worried with impressing you," she admitted quietly. "I needed to reevaluate the situation and remember that enemies won't care how you defeat them."
"Fair enough." Loki's eyes settled on her own, and for once they didn't seem quite so cold. "Why did you choose lightning?"
Is he trying to understand my methods or criticize me for my opinions? Numina wondered before supplying him with an answer. "Lightning is quick. It also has a tendency to transfer from one object or person to another, making it effective when dealing with groups."
"You don't think it was a little much for five enemies?" His question was an honest one, surprisingly without ridicule.
"It would cause some hesitation in a few that stood around them."
"But there were only five enemies."
"That you made visible," Numina said, allowing herself to smile. "One can never be certain with you, Loki."
It may have been because of the shift from shy to normal in Numina's personality, or the light-hearted nature with which she spoke, but either way, a small smile also tugged at the corner of Loki's lips. "You do have a point." He looked handsome when his features were no longer in a scowl. The sight of his relaxed features caused Numina's small grin to fade into a warm smile, friendly and endearing. "Your attack was impressive, yet with a bit more control you could have concentrated the effect more towards the illusions instead of having it disperse into thin air." He brought his hands together as if to mimic writing, creating parchment and pen for him to write with using his magic. "This book should give you a basic understanding." Numina took the paper he offered her. "Get through as much of it as you can before tomorrow."
Numina nodded, vowing that she would finish it today so that she did not unintentionally miss something he might test her over the next day. She was just about to bid Loki farewell when the doors to the training room burst open, the sudden boom causing her to jump.
"Brother!" Thor exclaimed, "I was wondering where you had secreted away Mother's beautiful lady-in-waiting." His smile was charismatic and beaming as he strode towards them.
Loki groaned quietly to himself. "It is no secret where I train my apprentice," he said, sounding unintentionally possessive. As Thor approached, Loki noticed that the small bit of confidence Numina had was slipping away as she just barely cowered away from his brother.
The grin Thor wore faded quickly, "Lady Numina, what happened to your arm?" he asked, overly worried.
She looked down, confused before she saw the burnt remnants of her sleeve. She had healed the wound but hadn't bothered fixing her clothes. "Oh! I-it caught fire while we were training," she stammered, quickly averting her eyes from his own that were filled with concern. But her answer backfired and Thor turned his attention to Loki, glowering at his brother as he rightfully placed the blame on him. It had been his magic, but it was her barrier that had been the issue. "It was my own fault," she blurted out quickly, bringing his attention back to her. "I was trying to bind fire into a motion activated glyph." Her words were rapid-fire due to her nerves. "I overestimated how much magic I was infusing it with, and the glyph detonated prematurely." She motion to her arm to end the explanation.
It was a blatant lie and she wasn't sure why she had said it, but Numina finally met Thor's eyes. She wanted to shrink into nothingness under his attention. "Were you injured?" Thor asked, buying Numina's dishonest explanation. His worry seemed to be alleviated when Numina nodded. "I am glad to hear it," he hummed. "I had been looking for you earlier because I was hoping you might join me for a stroll in the gardens," Thor continued, eyes trailing down Numina's features. "You saved my life and yet I know so little of you."
Numina stood frozen; it was now when she wished she knew how to disappear physically and from everyone's mind with magic, if such a thing was possible. Thor was sweet in an almost childish way, but Numina did not care for him much beyond friendship; and Thor was clearly interested in only the things beyond friendship.
"That…would be…lovely," she started, "but perhaps another time? I have a great deal of reading I need to do before tomorrow."
There wasn't a flicker of sadness or disappointment in his eyes like you would see with most men who were enraptured and attempting to court a beautiful woman. Thor's eyes remained stoically blissful as he continued to smile at her. "Another time then." He seized her hand, kissing her knuckles as he had when they first met before he turned and left as quickly as he had entered.
When the doors closed behind him, Numina let out a breath she had been holding the entire time, the tension that had held her so rigidly melting with the exhale. Throughout the conversation, Thor had been subtly moving closer towards her. It had taken every ounce of her will not to retreat backwards with each step he took forwards.
"Most would leap at the opportunity to spend an afternoon with Prince Thor, heir to the throne of Asgard," Loki commented cruelly, darkness creeping back into his features and voice.
Numina hung her head slightly, her gaze turned downwards. "I do not like the way he looks at me," she said in a small voice.
Loki started to say something that would be cruel or criticizing, but stopped. The confidence and smile he had seen on her earlier was a long forgotten memory. Now she looked frail and terrified. What he thought was his instinct to despise her timid nature was now replaced with the unreasonable desire to protect her from his brother. It was there long enough to stop his words, but he quickly shook it from his mind.
She was unaware of the small change Loki had witnessed in himself, sighing quietly before forcing herself to straighten out, to stand tall as though she were self-assured. "Thank you for the lesson…Loki," she said, his name slipping off her tongue melodically. "I hope the rest of your day goes well."
Her footsteps carried her calmly to the doors, but Loki's voice stopped her. "My lady!" he called to her.
Numina turned to face him and smiled genuinely. "Numina," she hummed, correcting him.
"Numina," he breathed, nodding his head. "You only need to get through the first three chapters."
The smile she wore broadened, and with a small bow, Numina exited the training area, stepping out into the dazzling sun that filtered in through the dazzling archways that marked the halls.
Loki watched her go, emerald eyes drawn to her. He did not look at her in the lecherous way Thor and Fandral did. His gaze was much more thoughtful than lustful. Numina had lied for him, sparing him the childish ire Thor would have rained down on him if he knew it was Loki's magic that had injured her. It was a…nice gesture, and Loki was curious as to why she would do such a thing. It was clear to him that she did not enjoy the attention of others, but she had drawn Thor's attention back to herself intentionally. It did not make sense to him. There was no reason for her to do so.
Perhaps it was out of kindness, Loki thought, remembering how Frigga had said that Numina had an unbiased, caring heart. That must be it. Yet once more he found himself thinking back with the way she reacted to Thor. Numina had all but retreated away from his brother, refusing to look at him unless it was required. Loki could not help but remember the anger he felt at the sight Numina flinching away from the God of Thunder while his brother remained oblivious to her discomfort.
Perhaps it is out of kindness, Loki though, forcing himself to unclench his fist as he relieved the fury. That must be it.
~~.O.~~
The night air was crisp with the refreshing chill it carried on the wind. Though it was pleasant on her skin, Numina drew her cloak closer around her shoulders. A faint breeze caused the pages of the book she read to rustle slightly. The blue fames she used to read by, dimmed and cast small shadows on the words. Small notes were glowing faintly on the page, inscribed with a small amount of illumination magic that would not leave a permanent mark in the margins. It was the third time she had read the book Loki had assigned her. Though he had only said the first three chapter before she had left, Numina took advantage of the copious amounts of free time she had that day. She also wanted to make the excuse she gave Thor previously as truthful as she could to placate some of the guilt she felt.
Numina felt confident with the material, something no typically common for her she acknowledged as she reached for a glass of water that was suspended in the air by her growing control over objects and her own energy. In fact, everything in her immediate area was floating at least a few inches or more: the small table beside her, the chair she was lounging on, the orb of light she read by, even her book, though she turned the pages herself; a small thing that she felt made the act of reading much more intimate.
With a small sigh of satisfaction, the book closed with controlled thud and Numina slowly lowered everything around her. Rising to her feet, she pulled the tome that hung from the air and exited the balcony, allowing her light to diminish as she lit the others that hung about the room. My room, she thought in wonder, shaking her head. It still doesn't feel right to call it that. The book glided to the desk after Numina tossed it in that direction, and she headed for the door, exiting and making her way to the grand library.
Those chambers may have been given to her, be hers by all rights; but it did not feel that way yet. The sense of being an interloper made it difficult for her to sleep at night. She felt like a tiny pebble that had been dropped into an ocean, swallowed by all the wealth that surrounded and enveloped her; and as she slowly sank to the bottom, things only became stranger, more alien with creatures and situations she had never thought to encounter in her lifetime.
Loki being the best example.
Anything Numina had assumed the God of Mischief to be like was completely thrown out the window. His reputation marked him as a scandalous trickster who was usually up to no good. If anything, Numina thought that Loki would behave in a similar fashion as Fandral. It was jarring at how wrong she had been.
The youngest son of Odin was not playful as his title, God of Mischief, might suggest; instead being unnaturally cold to everyone around him. For one who often played tricks at the expense of others, he had very limited patience with them, less so than they had with him. Loki was rather cruel as well, even with his own family. If Thor was to be viewed as the Golden Prince with strength and charisma, than Loki is the Dark Prince with lies and deception.
Yet when Numina had been training with him, he had relaxed a small amount in her presence. Loki's words had not been so cruel, his voice not as cold or venomous as it had been. As Numina had begun to feel slightly comfortable with him, Loki had seemingly responded in kind, treating her less of a burden and more like the apprentice she was. After Thor had left, after Numina had lied to avoid a confrontation between the two brothers, Loki had shown the biggest stray from his normally vindictive character. Most would not have noticed it, but for Numina it was as shocking as though she had jumped from a hot bath into a vat of ice.
Loki had addressed her as "my lady," when trying to get her attention; and for the first time, it had not been wielded as if it were an insult. He had also been willing to use her name, breathing it as though he had just seen a friend for the first time in many years instead of seeing some troublesome girl he had been assigned.
Numina shook her head. She did not know what to make of Loki.
The library doors now stood before her, big and ominous in the dim, flickering light. With her magic, she opened one of them, focusing on every single task it took to do so: turning the handle to the appropriate spot, hearing the small click of the lock, pulling the door open, pushing it once there was more surface area to do so. Control was all about manipulation on the smallest level. If you could do that unconsciously, control in other aspects of magic would come easily, almost naturally. Numina had taken longer than necessary to do something as simple as open the door, but it was because she wanted to make sure she was doing so correctly.
"You must move quickly from one target to the next," her mother's voice echoed. "But if you did not move slowly in training, you brain will not be able to process what is happening now. You must practice with calculated movements so that your body can repeat them on the fly while your mind sees everything as though time is moving slowly."
Even after so many years of being dead, Falare's words still came back to haunt Numina. You should always heed the lesson's your mother teaches you, but with each time Numina remembered one, she would cringe and do her best to forget. Numina was not the person her mother had tried to raise. She had vowed long before Falare's death that she would not be that person.
It was dark in the library, shadows creeping across the floor as moonlight was the only thing to softly illuminate the massive room from windows. Numina created another orb of light akin to the one she had read by earlier that evening. Her footsteps echoed faintly as she made her way forward.
Emerald eyes followed her as she walked towards the towering walls of ancient books and tomes. She was an intruder in this place of knowledge left untouched by the Asgardians who favored brutality over information and understanding of anything outside of what concerned them personally. This library may be open to all, but none used it; and as such, it had become Loki's private domain. An area he might retreat to when Thor or his father became too irksome to deal with.
Numina had no idea of the eyes that remained hidden in the shadows, watching her every move. Her small orb of light illuminating her path and the spines of books she studied before passing over, she made her way to the section that had studies on anatomy and physiology of beings. The particular book she finally found agreeable being on psychology, an abandoned science. Deviations from normal in a society are seen as weaknesses, particularly those of the mind. Asgardians with any kind of issue mentally did not typically last long.
She leafed through the pages carelessly, lingering on a random few that carried a particular headline that was intriguing before finally placing it back on the shelf. Her search continued for books around there. Numina always found how the mind works to be interesting and worth studying. If you knew how brain operates, it was not hard to discover how a particular individual would think and know them far better than they might know themselves.
"Find anything worth reading yet?" a voice called from the second floor. Numina turned to see Loki drop from the second floor balcony, landing gracefully on his feet.
"Not yet. Sadly studying the mind holds no particular interest in our society," she shrugged, turning slightly back to the shelf yet not fully turning her back on him.
"Indeed, they much prefer to hammer each other with weapons than read, let alone attempt to understand how something so complex," Loki said as he strode forward with cold elegance. When he stood beside her, peering over her shoulder to read the book in hand, he added, "Any suggestions?"
"Is that a serious question, my lord?" she asked in shy playfulness. "My assumption from your presence here at such an hour is that you spend a lot of time in the library. No doubt you have read every book in its collection.
Loki hummed softly in amusement. "Not yet. And what should I assume about you arriving in the library at this late hour?"
"Whatever you wish to assume, Loki," she replied. "You are a prince after all; it is your right." Numina's smile was faint, but enticing. "Isn't it an early hour by all technicalities, though?"
And he actually smiled. It was small, more closely resembling a smirk; but Numina's shy teasing was working its way to his heart, melting the frozen center with her warm blue eyes. "I suppose you are right. Now tell me, why are you here so early."
"Is that an order, your highness?"
"It can be." This man that stood before her was so unlike the Loki she had experienced only days early, insulting and ridiculing Numina harshly. That Loki wouldn't be smiling at Numina or holding an almost normal conversation with her. Perhaps he was as weary as she was and the mask he wore was slipping, much as her own was.
Numina smiled. "I find it difficult to sleep in the palace. Everything is so foreign." She turned to him after placing the book on the shelf, her hand lingering there as an anchor. "What about you?"
He hesitated with an answer. "I came here to escape my brother's loud antics."
She nodded in understanding. "He has…a very exuberant personality."
"That is a large understatement, nearly as large as his ego."
"What was your brother doing tonight to drive you into the library?"
"He was encouraging me- loudly- to bring you to the arena tomorrow to watch him, the Warriors Three, and Lady Sif spar in the training arena." At Numina's frown he continued. "I would have managed to talk us out of it had our father not readily agreed." Loki shook his head disapprovingly. "They believe it would be much to your benefit to learn of physical combat in addition to what I teach you."
Loki saw Numina tense. It was understandable, though, since she was hesitant with offensive magic it would only stand to reason that offensive fighting gave her pause as well. "Must I?" she asked meekly.
"Would you disobey an order from your King?" He raised an eyebrow, taunting her.
"No."
"Then I will see you there tomorrow," he sighed, turning to leave the library.
Numina watched him go, dread filling her at the prospect of tomorrow. She would not mind watching warriors mindlessly hash it out against one another, but she was fearful that she may be asked to spar. And if Thor was the one to insist, who was she to refuse a prince?
~~.O.~~
"And here is the beautiful lady Numina," Thor bellowed as she approached, beaming smile betraying his desire.
"It is good to see you again, your highness," she responded shyly, offering a small bow.
"Come now," he replied gently, coming to stand beside her, as if escorting her to the side of the field where the others stood. "What have I told about titles between us?" A muscular arm snaked its way across her shoulders, guiding her closer to him. Numina had to fight the urge to twist it around him, pinning it painfully to his back.
"Is it not a beautiful day, Thor?" she asked, correcting her formality.
Though it did not seem possible, Thor's smile grew. "It is, though the beauty of the day cannot compare to the radiance with which you shine."
Numina felt herself blush. She was about to brush aside his comment, thanking him but saying that he was merely flattering her, when a voice sliced through the air, chilling it. "My, my brother. I believe that was the largest word you have said yet. Your vocabulary must be growing." Loki was now walking beside them, making Numina the person in the middle. How strange it was that she was now important enough to be flanked on either side by Princes.
As if shaken by his brother's presence, worried of what he might think of his own closeness to the trickster's apprentice, Thor dropped the arm he had draped over Numina's shoulders. "Loki," Thor greeted him, voice and happiness slightly reserved. "Good of you to finally join us."
"And miss a chance to watch you fools batter each other to pieces," Loki replied dryly. "Perish the thought."
Thor chuckled deeply. "You're only sour because you have difficulty winning if we don't allow you to cheat."
Numina managed to ease herself away from the bickering brothers as they came to stand by the Warriors Three and Sif, all of which were spread out a bit either sharpening their weapons or readjusting their armor. "What do you mean?" she asked innocently.
"He means his magic, my dear," Fandral interjected with a smirk. "Magic is the ultimate cheat. It's tricky and a dishonorable way to fight." Numina frowned at him, shaking her head lightly. "No offense, of course, my lady Numina. I'm sure you will fight honorably when you do."
"If she fights," Hogun added quietly.
"And what is this 'your lady' nonsense?" Thor asked jokingly. "Claiming her for yourself already?"
"Yes, yes, Prince Thor with his giant hammer making women swoon left and right," Fandral said before winking at Numina, "but my dashingly subtle wit and charm has already won her over, I can tell."
"Nothing about you is subtle Fandral," Loki all but laughed.
"You can tell that much by the way he dresses," Volstagg called. "I wonder, did you pick out that ridiculous outfit or did you fall into your wardrobe and it just sort of happened?" Numina chuckled. Of the three warriors, Volstagg was becoming a fast favorite.
Fandral glared from Loki to Volstagg and back again, he had finally come up with something to say, but was interrupted. "Are we going to stand around arguing all day, or will there be sparring?" Sif asked, double bladed sword grasped firmly in her hands.
"Are you volunteering, Lady Sif?" Thor jested.
"If it means that you and Fandral will quit fawning over Numina, I will gladly."
"Perhaps Fandral should prove his…devotion to Lady Numina by facing Thor in a sparring match?" Loki asked mischievously, smirking.
"I…would gladly…but on another day," Fandral stammered. "One must properly prepare for a fight with the Mighty Thor."
"Are you too afraid to face him?" Numina asked with feign innocence, secretly relishing Fandral scrambling for a decent excuse.
"Fear has nothing to do with it, darling," Fandral said. "I simply was not expecting to duel Thor."
"So you won't face me?" Thor asked, gloating smile on his face.
"I will," Volstagg said, retrieving his axe from his side. "I do not need preparation to spar."
Numina smiled at the baffled look Fandral gave him as the voluminous warrior passed, following Thor onto the field. The two warriors took their places, standing at the ready. Behind her came Hogun's bellowing voice louder than she had ever heard him speak. "Begin!" he roared.
The warriors leapt at one another, trading reserved blows. Sparring was not entirely about winning, it was about using your skill and broadening it. No doubt either Thor or Volstagg could have claimed victory in the beginning moments of the duel, however their honor as warriors kept either of them from taking advantage from the other's reservation. Numina watched with fascination as the two men grappled with one another. She had never seen Thor or any of the Warriors Three in battle. It was an impressive sight to watch gods duel with one another.
As more minutes began to pass, the battle started to turn in favor of Thor. Though it was only because of his weapon. Mjolnir was incredibly powerful. Volstagg's own axe, while impressive, was not anywhere near on the same level. It seemed quite unfair in Numina's opinion. It was then that she decided to use her newfound control to manipulate the duel, not caring if it would be seen as cheating.
Thor lunged towards Volstagg, who had stumbled backwards from a previous blow- push the tip of his foot down- and found that he had misjudged a step, stumbling himself, allowing Volstagg enough time to raise the hilt of his axe into a block before making it back onto his feet. Volstagg swung his axe towards Thor- can't effect Mjolnir with magic, push his elbow out slightly- whose block was slightly off center, sending him reeling backwards with the force behind Volstagg's strike. The look on Thor's face was one of utter shock, surely had had not been so careless.
Loki's eyes moved swiftly from the sparring match that played out before him to Numina. Her interference had been expertly subtle, the manipulation almost going unnoticed by himself. A smile of amusement played upon his lips. Even though the act of consciously controlling things with her magic was new to her, Numina was using it quite tactfully. Thor and Volstagg were quite used to Loki and his many tricks, but they had not picked up on her meddling yet.
Volstagg went to block a hefty blow from Thor's hammer, rising his axe over his head to catch it once more on the hilt- reinforce his knees, keep him standing upright- managing to hold his stance before shoving Thor back. Yet Thor was not deterred. He rose Mjolnir to batter Volstagg with the same strike once more- nothing to push subtly just keep Volstagg standing and relax the muscles in Thor's wrist- but as the blow landed, tremors reverberated painfully from his hand. Volstagg had survived Thor's barrage and the two began circling each other, Thor shaking out his arm to quell the painful tingling in his muscles.
"Enjoying yourself?" Loki hummed. Numina had not realized he had approached her.
"It doesn't seem like a fair fight," she replied.
Thor deflected the blade of Volstagg's axe to the side- keep his fingers firmly wrapped around the hilt and slow down the momentum created by the blow- but he managed to keep ahold of his weapon.
"I almost didn't notice you meddling," Loki teased.
"I'll take that as a compliment." Numina smiled softly.
Volstagg's axe came down on Mjolnir, raised in Thor's defense- all together now: push out his elbow, relax the muscles, reinforce Volstagg's movements, and increase the force of his blow- but he was not quick enough and Mjolnir was forced to the side. Volstagg held the blade of his axe in position to lop of Thor's head. He was victorious.
Thor laughed, losing the match surprising well instead of sourly as Numina imagined. "Well done my friend," he beamed. "It seems that fortune favored you today."
"Not quite," Loki remarked in an aside meant only for Numina, she allowed herself smile to grow larger in pride.
"Who's next?" Thor asked as Volstagg walked back to the side of the field. "Perhaps the lady Numina would care to spar?"
Her face dropped. She did not wish to spar, let alone against Thor; thankfully Fandral saved her. "Do you want to give her a heart attack Thor?" he asked in bewilderment. "Even those of us who are you friends show some reservation when it comes to sparring with you."
"Then perhaps you should be the one she faces, Fandral," Sif goaded him.
"No, I really don't-" Numina started, trying to back out of the match that was being set up against her will.
"I think it's a good idea," Thor laughed.
"Well, if you all insist…" Fandral said, acting as though he were forced and failing at being convinced. "Would you care for a dance, my lady?" He offered Numina a bow as he turned to face her.
Numina's muscles locked up, her body and mind screaming against it. She was afraid to duel Fandral, but she was also afraid of disappointing or insulting anyone by refusing. "Very well," Numina replied.
"Pick your weapon of choice," Thor said, motioning to the racks of weapons that were propped against the wall. "Or weapons if you prefer."
Loki had not jumped to her defense, instead allowing the others to push her into something she obviously did not desire. He watched her go, seeing through the mask that hid her fear and nervousness. Numina was so unsure of herself, if dueling Fandral would get her to step outside of her comfort zone, perhaps it would lead to more steps, making her less boring than she already was. Or at least, that is what Loki told himself as he stood back and did nothing.
Her heart was racing in her chest, it was all she could do to appear calm, to walk steadily towards the weapons. There were swords, axes, maces, staves, pikes, bows…and daggers. They glistened dangerously as she approached, calling to her with a sweet song. She longed to reach for something other than those tempting blades, a sword or staff, anything that wasn't those enticing fangs. Her hands gripped the weapon of her choice: twin daggers. Numina was too weak to refuse their nostalgic call.
As she took to the field, daggers caressed firmly in her hands, a part of Numina that had long since been buried resurfaced, unbidden. Her pounding heart was snuffed back to its calm rate. Fear was banished and replaced with soothing relaxation. A strange gleam entered her eye as she surveyed Fandral, smug grin plastered on his face as he held his rapier with a stance that flaunted how cock-sure he was. Numina smirked. It would be an easy duel even if he was no doubt going to prolong it with an attempt to go easy on the timid young lady that stood before him.
And as she had called it, "I will go easy on you this time, my dear," Fandral said with laughter.
"Manipulation is a woman's inherent skill," Falare whispered. "I hope that you won't, my lord," Numina said innocently, hiding this newfound confidence, person, that had revealed itself within her. "I would prefer to have an honest fight to know where I am lacking in strength or skill."
And like all men would for a woman's charm, he fell for it. "Very well," Fandral smiled. "I simply did not wish for the length of the duel to dishearten you."
"That is not the only length she might be disheartened with when it comes to you Fandral," Loki called from the sidelines.
Numina could not help but smile as Fandral struggled with some sort of comeback at the trickster's words. "Shall we?" she asked, taking up a basic fighting stance that withheld any inclination of her skill. Fandral's smile grew to an obnoxious toothy grin. He nodded playfully, widening his own stance with a few half steps.
"Begin!" Thor's deep cry vibrated around the entire area, drawing the attention of bystanders and those that were also sparring alike.
Instincts that had been long since buried took over. Her mother's training recaptured Numina's body and took control of her. She would describe the experience as similar to blacking out, everything before and after was lucid, able to be controlled; but when she fought Fandral, a darkness that had been nurtured by her mother forced itself forward, keeping her fully aware of what she was doing, but not allowing her to realize the full extent of what was happening.
Daggers slashed through the air with deadly accuracy and speed. Metal clashed against metal. Blows were parried or dodged with a simple sidestep. There was feigning, striking, blocking. A person was always on the retreat as the other pushed forward, a brutal dance that took hold of their muscles, driving them forward. Numina loved to dance.
She was aware during the entire duel. She could feel her muscles contract and flare as her blades sliced through the air towards Fandral. She could hear him gasping in surprise as her blows continuously landed with unexpected strength, hear his frustration as another one of his blows glanced to the side as she met his blade with one her own. She felt satisfaction as she never missed, as she pressed forward and he was continuously retreating backwards to get away from the flurry of blades.
It felt good, this dance of death whose steps Numina knew by heart even after so many years of refusing to dance to the sound of its sweet and tempting music. None could ever be her partner and live unless she wished it. None could ever match her steps or movements.
She danced, spinning and twirling, daggers flowing in harmony with her nimble steps. Her moonlight hair, would fan out behind her with each turn, stinging playfully on her cheeks. The weapons she caressed in her hands were not tools, they were an extension of herself. They were added danger to her perilous dance.
The tip of her dagger rested lightly against his neck. Fandral's rapier lay in the dirt to his side where it had flown from Numina's fluid movement meant to disarm him. He was breathing hard, sweat running down from his brow. His eyes were wide with shock as he stared at the woman he had thought shy and timid, lacking in ability. He did not recognize her at that moment.
In a matter of minutes, Numina had won the duel. But it was only now that she was realizing it. The terrifying gleam that had permeated her icy blue eyes faded rapidly, the cold grip of death replaced by gentle crystalline water. Her body, which had been still and relaxed, now tensed. Her heart which had beat normally now raced within the confines of her chest. Horror spread throughout her entire body as Numina realized what she had done.
The daggers fell to the ground as she shrank away from Fandral. "I yield," she stammered. "The victory is yours." And she fled.
Numina did not give herself time to see how disturbed her friends had looked, how shocked they were by her actions. There was fear in some of their eyes, Fandral and Sif. There was disbelieving in Volstagg, Hogun, and Thor's. And in Loki? He looked shocked, to say the least, though he was more intrigued than disturbed.
The same could be said of Odin as he watched Numina leave the arena, though he did not have a desire to understand as Loki did. He only thought of how Falare had trained her daughter well, and how such skills could be used to serve Asgard once more.
~~.O.~~
Loki could not find Numina. She had all but disappeared after her duel with Fandral. Was she truly ashamed with how she had fought? He wondered as he left her chambers, the maids having informed him that she had not returned since she left in the morning.
"No one has seen her, my son," the Queen said as she approached. She was one of the very few that could manage to sneak up on him. "If you are looking for Numina."
"She is not one to miss a lesson," Loki replied, putting distance between himself and the emotions that others might attach to him.
"You are not concerned?"
"Should I be?" Loki countered, forced cold edge lacing his words. "Women are often flitting between one emotion to the next. Am I supposed to be surprised that lady Numina is no different?"
Frigga smiled, laughter humming in her throat. "Always playing the role of uncaring prince, are we?" Loki opened his mouth to argue, but the Queen cut him off. "Whatever your reason for seeking Numina, you should know that it will be impossible to find her if she does not wish to be found… Her mother taught her far too well." The last sentence sounded almost sad. Loki half expected her to say "such a shame," afterwards.
Loki watched his mother leave as quickly as she had come with more questions than answers. The hall was now empty except for him. Her mother taught her well? It was the second time he had heard that phrase. The assassin Mercy or her mother Falare? It was for curiosity's sake alone that Loki vanished from sight with the aid of his magic. It might be uneventful for a while, but he had patience enough.
Loki propped himself against the wall opposite of the door to Numina's chambers and waited.
~~.O.~~
Night had fallen across Asgard when Numina finally stole towards her chambers, dancing from one shadow to the next with magic known only by those of her craft, as any assassin would when stalking a target. If any were to glance her way, they would see nothing, for she moved through the darkness on the walls and floor. It was as if by fate that the moon cast light on the door to her room, causing Numina to step out of the smothering comfort of the shadows, emerging from the gloom and into the light, her blond hair radiating faintly like a full moon on a cloudless night. Numina rested her hand on the door-
"I was starting to wonder if you would ever show up."
Numina whipped around to face the voice, recognizing it as she turned. Loki strode forward from his own piece of darkness in the hallway with calm and controlled steps, gracefully rigid. His hand trailing the length of the wall before he turned to face her once he too was in the moonlight. The green of his clothing seemed to vibrate with their own light, rich and elegant in color, rivaled only by emerald eyes filled with mischief and curiosity.
Frowning slightly, Numina waited for him to continue, offering him nothing but silence. "After your little duel with Fandral, your name is on quite a few lips," he taunted her.
"Let them talk," Numina snapped.
Anger. It was something Loki had never seen in Numina before. Frustration, yes; though that was typically aimed towards herself and involved sighing disappointedly in something she had done incorrectly. Anger, rage, that was something new, something surprising. Anger at what? "By all means," Loki continued, shrugging elaborately. "There is nothing you could do to stop them anyway."
She hissed impatiently. "What do you want, your highness?"
She's starting to become me, Loki realized, smirking in amusement. He ignored the question. "Most of what they say is how well your mother taught you."
"I am not my mother!" Numina growled.
There it is. Flames of venomous rage burned brightly in the ice of her eyes. A taunting smile spread across his lips. "I never said you were."
She went to say a retort of some sort but stopped, realizing that Loki had played her quite well. "I do not have time for you," she started shouting. "Go and hiss vindictively at someone else. I do not care to deal with-"
Loki closed the space between them, seizing her by the arms forcefully, driving the breath and words from her mouth. The sudden movement was unexpected, the strength he gripped her with being enough to leave bruises. The world spun around them dizzyingly, the hallway blurring into nothing but smudged colors. When the landscape finally settled, Loki and Numina were no longer by the doors to her chambers. Towering trees loomed ominously above them.
Numina ripped herself from his grasp.
"You can thank me later," he said coldly. She narrowed her eyes at him. "Yelling at your prince? A treasonous offence. If others overheard you, you would be dead by the next morning."
"At this moment, I don't care." Numina had regained her composure, but anger permeated her words.
"Then if you are so hell-bound for the axe, you should at least come clean with someone," Loki goaded her.
"And that someone should be you?" She asked mockingly.
"Did you see anyone else waiting for you?" he retorted.
That stopped her. Loki had a point. She had seen the others searching for her, all of them giving up after a time. Numina had assumed that Loki was among him, yet he had been waiting for her by her room. It was more than anyone else had done for her. She closed her eyes and concentrated on the feeling of cold water washing over her, dousing the flames that raged within her. Her labored, angered breathing became normal, her racing heart slowed. When she opened her eyes, Loki was still there, though he did not look the same.
The smug look he had worn as he toyed with her was gone. The darkness that lingered in his eyes was replaced with a soft light as he gazed at her. His body and expression were relaxed. Loki looked like someone would if they honestly cared. Perhaps he did, or perhaps it was another trick, an illusion of some sort.
Numina shook her head, frustrated, tired, emotional…she was quite the mess. "I am not my mother," she repeated in a whisper. "I refuse to be her."
"Has anyone ever said that you are?" Loki asked. His voice was soft now, caring almost.
"She's taught you well," Numina said, her voice dishearteningly depressed. "As if it is something I should be proud of. As if it is a wondrous thing Falare did for me." She all but spit out her mother's name as if it were bile.
"Is it not?"
"No!" she snapped, anger resurfacing. "That woman took her daughter and raised her in darkness and blood. 'Cut here to make them bleed out slowly, drag your blade across this cluster of nerves to make them beg for death, slash here to make their blood fly through the air…'" Numina stopped to regain her breath. "'Don't you dare cry. Sever your emotions as you would sever their limbs. Don't you dare care. You will have to kill them eventually.'" Her breathing was ragged as she fought off tears. "'This is how you kill them quickly. This is how you kill them slowly. This is how you torture someone for the truth. This is how you torture someone hear their secrets. This is how you torture someone to get them to spill everything.' 'Don't bother wiping away the blood. Embrace it. It is what you are. Use it to fuel the fear you will instill.'" She stopped, her nails digging painfully into the palm of her hand. She was trying hard to stay strong, refusing to cry in front of him.
"Numina…" Loki tried, taking a few steps forward; but he stopped himself. For first time in perhaps hundreds of years, Loki did not know what to do. Faced with the raw emotion Numina was showing him, he was speechless and uncertain.
"That woman was an assassin and raised her daughter to be an assassin," Numina finally continued. "All for her fucking legacy. She raised me to know only how to bring death, instill fear, and leave lakes of blood in my wake… I was raised to become what she was until she finally died: a monster." She struggled to even her breath, to fight away tears, and to remain standing on her feet. In all her life, Numina had never shared these thoughts with anyone. There was no one to tell. All she had was her mother until she was finally alone, finally free. Yet Falare was still alive even in death. Numina would still here her rough, chastising voice. She would remember her when she used the skills her mother forced onto her.
Loki finally found his words. "You are not a monster."
Numina laughed unbelievingly. "Because when a liesmith tells you that you are not a monster, you believe them." She saw Loki flinch reflexively, and realized how cruel her words had been. "I-I'm sorry…that was unworthy."
"Is that your view of me?" he asked, removing the emotion from his voice in a painfully obvious manner.
"I don't know what to make of you Loki," Numina sighed, the weight of everything crushing her. "You are cruel and vindictive, playing jokes and saying insults at the expense of everyone else. Yet you do things to contradict this. There are occasions when you are teaching me something where you relax and seem to car, and even now is an example of this." Numina fanned her arms out, motioning to their surroundings. "I don't know who you are, and even if you told me, I do not know if I could believe you."
Loki seemed to ponder this as Numina hastily averted her eyes from his in shame and self-consciousness. She did not see him retrieve the dagger he always kept on him, did not see it raise to his arm. It was the sound of ripping cloth and his own hiss in pain that pulled her eyes back to him. The blade had sliced cleanly through the underside of his forearm, deep and ugly. Blood poured from it at a distressing rate. Loki had made the wound deep enough to be able to kill him if it wasn't healed quickly.
"What are you doing!?" Numina cried out in alarm as she rushed forward. With tender movements, she seized Loki's arm, his clothing disintegrating at her touch to reveal the self-inflicted injury. Blue magic flowed from her fingertips where she held his arm, snaking its way across his skin and into the wound. He felt cool to the touch under her own warm hands as her magic worked quickly, healing the severed muscles and veins and sealing his skin, smoothing away the injury without even a scar to betray what had happened.
Loki watched her with gentle eyes. Her offensive abilities were good, but nothing compared to the wonders should could do with healing. As the blue light of her warm magic faded, he spoke with quiet, thoughtful words. "Why didn't you take the dagger from my hand and use it against me?" Numina said nothing, neither looking him in the eyes nor letting go of his arm and retreating backwards. "That is what an assassin would have done. A monster would have taken my weapon and rammed into my throat." She exhaled loudly, continuing to look off to the side. Loki placed a hand on top of her own, covering her fingertips that still caressed the arm she had just healed. It was that subtle movement that drew her eyes. Pale blue, raw and frozen ice met his soft emerald eyes. "I have seen men butcher innocent women and children in raids. They were monsters. I have seen men and woman kill out of greed. They were monsters." He shook his head lightly. "You would do all that you could to help someone in need…even an arrogant prince that has done nothing but insult you without reason. You are not a monster, Numina. You are the most compassionate person I have ever met."
She threw her gaze to the side after his last sentence, unsure of herself and of him. "Ever the teacher with harsh lessons for me to learn…" she said faintly, a weak smile tugging at the corners of her lips.
Loki pulled away from her, and Numina relinquished her tender grip on his arm. The wooded area they had been was now long gone. They stood back in the hallway, Numina with her back against the door and Loki standing on the opposite side, framed by the moonlight the pooled from the window.
His next words surprised even himself. "Perhaps someday, a friend you can come to."
There was warm hope melting in her eyes as she looked at him, but it was all but hidden. "I wish I could believe you."
"Do not doubt what I have told you tonight. Use it, if you must, for what I say from now on to tell lie from truth." Loki hesitated for a moment before adding, "Numina…I have been the most honest with you tonight than I have been with myself in years."
"Why?"
He shook his head, laughing quietly at the absurdity of it all, "I don't know." Loki did not give Numina the chance to respond, offering her a small bow before turning to leave.
"Loki!" Numina called to him, stopping him. Loki's expression as he looked back to her was warm, sincere in showing that he…cared. "You should be uncertain more often," she said, blushing softly. "I…like who you are."
Loki's head dipped in a deep nod, which also served as a final farewell. His footsteps echoed loudly against the stone floors in the silent hall. He didn't know why he had done or said anything that night. But for the moment, as he remembered the feather light warmth of Numina's touch, Loki did not care.
~~.O.~~
Author's Note:
Alright! Second Chapter! Wahoo! So far things are going pretty good. I promise that things will eventually get interesting, I'm just attempting to avoid large gaps of time passing between chapters, otherwise it might seem that things are off in the relationships between characters and whatnot.
Please let me know what you think! I love feedback and am willing to take any suggestions you have to offer!
Thank you for reading! :)