Katie

Sitting here, on my king size, with a glass of mineral water (always hydrate before bed) and the TV on mute, I congratulated myself, if that's the right word, for managing to break the news of my sisters infidelity to Naomi as graciously as possible. Anyone who knows us, certainly from Roundview and Uni days, will think that's an achievement in itself. There were times when I would have happily strangled her. But I've grown up a bit since then, and so has she. Cheating on my sister with the dead girl wasn't her finest hour. But she was 17...confused, hormones all over the place, etc etc. In short, a typical 6th former with sexual identity issues. So far so predictable. But after my sister had dissolved into a pile of adoring goo when the blonde made her 'Freddies shed' declaration of undying love, I accepted the inevitable and came to terms, not only with my sister being a carpet muncher, but that Campbell was 'the one' for her.

Which makes it all the fucking harder to understand what the hell has just happened. Cheating...Emily? And not just a half arsed pissed up finger fuck on the sofa with some random, regretted straight afterwards and punished by fucking months of my sister playing Mother Teresa (ringing any bells, Naomi?). No...Emily has to go the whole hog and have a full blown affair. I'd skimped on the details, to save the blonde any more agony, but according to the salivating security guard (lesbianism still being numero uno on his list of wanking sites, no doubt) the affair was the talk of the building. Not exactly discrete, my sister, when she's besotted. I remembered how she used to follow Campbell around at school, all doe eyed and sad sideways glances. Fucking hell, she might as well have held out her knickers in surrender and just laid down in the corridor?

No, this was a fucking full on affair, complete with hand holding and secret meetings. I really have no idea what Emily is playing at. It's not as if anyone saw it coming, was it? As far as I was concerned, all was well in muff mansion. OK, they weren't quite so touchy feely in public these days, but its been 6 fucking years, yeah? Juliet and Juliet were entitled to tone it down a bit by now, weren't they? In the early days I would catch them at it every possible chance they got, and I thanked the Lord that for my eyesights sake, they had recently given up on public make out sessions. Catching your sister being orally pleasured on the 6 seater table my mother was so proud of was worthy of an intense visit to Specsavers. I suspect that was a bit of territory marking by my younger sister, you know...doing it there. Campbell is still wary about my mother even now, and with good reason. In full sail, my mum would make a Kiwi prop think twice about tackling her.

But I still couldn't get my head round why Emily had gone so comprehensively off the rails. Cheating just wasn't something anyone would suspect her of. No way.

It was getting on for 11pm, and I knew what was going to happen very shortly. If Emily had stuck to her routine with this fucking Izzie slut, it would have been a couple of drinks (my sister always was more amorous on alcohol) then back to whatever bolt hole they had found for a quick horizontal tango for two. Then on the tube, back to Chez Campbell, where a very unwelcome welcoming party of one was waiting.

I winced as I imagined the conversation that would follow. Campbell can be very cutting when she wants to be and being caught virtually with your knickers down by your girlfriend, doesn't make you the best come back artist, does it?

So I reckoned on half an hour of shouting, Emily abject apologies and some sobbing on both sides. Then Campbell would do her patented storming out thing and after a few minutes, my sister would be on the phone to yours truly.

I sighed and poured another glass of aqua minerale, in preparation for the inevitable. Just as well I'd had a bath and washed my hair. I had a feeling the call would be short on words and long on crying.

I wasn't wrong.

Ten minutes after 11, a few minutes later than I thought, my Samsung buzzed. The picture of my sister that flicked on was taken at a far happier time for all of us. It was an old one, when her hair was still red and she had that residual tan from their trip to Vegas two years ago. I thought at the time that they might do the lamo thing of getting married in an Elvis chapel or something equally hideous, but apparently Campbell vetoed that spectacular own goal. One more reason to tolerate her I guess. It would have been a very Emily gesture, but the blonde was more of a traditionalist. She'd promised me once after a boozy night when Ems was at a conference recently (now even that was suspect) that she'd let me design her wedding dress when the time came. If you'd have asked me before tonight, I would have said they were on the verge of tying the knot any day now, but it just goes to show how wrong you can be, huh?

I picked up the phone and tapped the green slider. The phone stayed silent for a moment, then I heard the unmistakeable sound of my sister in full meltdown. I didn't even try to speak. She wasn't making any fucking sense anyway. I just let her sob and stutter half words for a few moments. Then eventually my patience ran out.

"Emily…?" I said sharply and heard the quick intake of breath the other end. I took the chance, while she was winding up for another wail to say something.

"I take it you've spoken to Naomi?" I said quickly. The second intake of breath told me she now realised I knew more than she thought I did.

"You've spoken to her...why...I mean when Katie?" she choked, then descending into another round of hopeless sobs.

I waited for another oxygen gathering pause.

"Spoke to her tonight actually...at your place...you know, when you were 'working late'" I said in a voice of pure ice.

"YOU told her?..." she said, coughing and making that husky sound in her chest Campbell apparently finds endearing at certain moments (don't even….)

"Someone had to...you certainly weren't going to Emily...YOU were quite happy to carry on shagging this Izzie skank till doomsday...not very fair was it?"

There was a silence the other end while she digested the news that not only had I revealed her sordid little affair, but that I knew the name of the whore she had been serially shagging.

"How did you...when…?" she managed before sobbing again. I think it was finally hitting her that it was all out now. Even her lifelong ally, her sister, was in on it.

This time I didn't wait for her to stop crying. I might have been there all night.

"Simple Em...you weren't exactly being discrete, were you? Intimate lunches every day...holding hands coming out of the building...working fucking late every Wednesday. How long did you think it was going to stay secret...betraying your actual girlfriend I mean?"

I made my voice deliberately cutting. No point in letting her think I was anything but disgusted with her. I've never been comfortable with cheating, which might surprise some people. I might have gone through boyfriends like false nails in my youth (OK, I still do) but I normally have the grace to dump the current squeeze before lining up the next platinum credit card, sorry I mean potential shag, in my sights. It's only fair?

"Why Katie...why would you tell her?" she said dully.

I laughed at that...I mean actually laughed out loud.

"For fucks sake Emily...it might have escaped your notice but Naomi is actually my friend as well as your girlfriend. What sort of a shit friend would I be if I let you go on dumping on her. Don't try and turn this on me. YOU'RE the fucking cheat"

She stayed silent, so I carried on.

"You do realise you've fucked it completely this time, don't you? She's completely devastated...wrecked. Are you proud of yourself? What is it...still trying to get even for Sophia? Jesus Emily...Naomi was 17...scared, confused, boxed in. Don't you think you punished her enough back then? Snogging that random at the barbecue, trailing that troll Mandy round with you for weeks, egging her on without ever putting out. Fucking sleeping with the bitch in your girlfriends bed?"

"It wasn't like that...I never..." Emily tried to interrupt.

"Not for lack of trying, I bet...anyway whether you actually shagged Mandy or not, you gave Naomi hell for months and let her think you were banging the troll Emily. And now?...You can't tell me you and this cunt Izzie aren't doing the dirty deed every Wednesday after work, can you?"

Another silence, which was as good as a confession.

"Anyway...she fucking knows it all now...I'm guessing she's bailed on you and now you want someone's shoulder to cry on?"

"I thought...you're my twin sister Katie…?" Emily said weakly.

"Yeah...I am, and I suppose you'd better come round, but just so's you're clear. I think you did a shitty, low thing. And if she never wants to speak to you again, let alone be anywhere near you, its down to you, right?"

She whispered a defeated "yes" and hung up.

Fifteen minutes later, the doorbell rang. She must have found a cab in Upper Street straight away. God knows what the cab driver must have thought of her, She looked like she'd escaped a knocking shop. Hair all over the place, makeup ruined and red eyed, clutching a tissue.

She almost fell into the hall when I opened the door.

For the next few minutes, all I could do was hold her while her shoulders shook and she sobbed for England. Emily upset is one thing, she was completely distraught tonight. If it had been for any other reason, I would have sympathised, but I was still really angry with her, so I lifted her head and spoke to her.

"Right...well.. lets go into the lounge, huh? You've ruined my new dressing gown, so lets not add the carpet to the bill...?"

I got a reproachful look for that barb, but fuck it, she deserved to suffer a bit more.

A cup of tea and a clean towel to dry her face and we were sitting opposite each other in the lounge, me on a chair, her on the couch. I waited till she had swallowed the last of the hot sweet tea before speaking.

"So...you cheated with this Izzie...Naomi knows...and before you start giving me those accusing looks, just know this. Other people knew about it too. It was only a matter of time before someone slipped your ex the poison pill. I thought it was better coming from someone who cared about her, right?"

My hard stare stopped her from trying to pin any more blame on me. She nodded weakly and wrung the towel between her hands. It looked like she might need a new one shortly.

"I've been so...so stupid..." she said in a whisper.

I nodded.

"Yep...trading the love of your life for a temporary fling is pretty stupid Ems...but then it wasn't just a one off was it...by the sounds of it, you and this Izzie have been getting it on for months?"

She shook her head violently.

"N...no...it wasn't like that...we started off as just friends...then it sort of..."

"Developed? " I said unhelpfully "One night you tripped and your fingers slipped inside her fanny...happens all the time Em...perfectly normal...I've lost count of the times its happened to me..."

Again I got the reproachful look but I ignored it.

"Still...now Naomi's gone for good?" I said coldly "You can move this Izzie in to Chez Fitch and stop hiding it from the world...seamless...huh?"

Again the shake of the head.

"That's not gonna happen" she said miserably, her eyes flicking up to mine

"She's...she's...married"

"Married!" I yelled "Oh...fucking priceless...and I suppose she was going to leave her husband for you, yeah?"

Emily shook her head again.

"I don't think so...we never really discussed it...we've only just started...you know..."

"Brilliant" I said icily "So...lets summarise things shall we. You and Naomi are going through a bit of a bad patch...so you think...bingo...I'll fuck some straight woman...get my kicks converting her...then when I'm bored, I'll give Naomi another go...with me so far?"

I saw Emily wilting under the strength of my contempt.

"That's not what happened Katie...me and Naomi...we've been drifting...spending more time apart. I thought..I thought..."

"You thought munching a strange...straight...muff was the answer to your prayers..."

This time there was a definite flash of anger in Emily's eyes but I stared her down.

"So..." I carried on "As I see it Emsy...you have two choices. Let Naomi go...her heart will heal eventually, though by the look of her earlier on, it might take a fucking decade...Then you can concentrate on getting this...Izzie woman...to turn full time lezzer and run off into the sunset with you...oh, good luck with that one by the way. I've dated married men, usually without knowing they were married at first...they all say they'll leave their other halves for you Em...in my experience, if they don't do it inside a month, its just bullshit, designed to part you from your knickers...Anyway...that's one option, if you're stupid enough to try it. Or...you can take your head out of your arse and do anything and everything you can to get Naomi to forgive you. I wish you luck with THAT one too. Basically, you're fucked"

I sat back and let her have another cry over that little bombshell. Tough love was needed, and here endeth the first Katie Fitch lesson.

XXX

I ended up letting Emily sleep with me that night. There was no way anything constructive was gonna happen till morning anyway. I have to to tell you that it was a fucking uncomfortable experience, sleeping with an emotional, jittery wreck of a sister. Fuck knows how Campbell put up with her all these years...Still, they probably shagged each other to a standstill first

Just before I went to sleep, I decided to see if I could raise Campbell on the phone. No joy, not that I was surprised. Emily told me just before she passed out with exhaustion, that Naomi was Bristol bound. Ever predictable, she was heading for Mummy. Oh well, I thought, at least I know where to find her...